The Order of Ocelot Tamers

Have you ever wanted to tame your very own ocelot? Don't know what an Ocelot is? Interested in protecting world order? Then this club is for you! Here you can name and tame your very own Ocelot! Post pictures of Ocelots, describe your Ocelot obsessions, and tell tales of your Ocelot hunting stories! Short Version: <div class="spoiler"><input type="button" class="button" onClick="this.nextSibling.nextSibling.style.display='block';this.style.display='none';" value="Show spoiler"> <span class="spoiler_content" style="display:none"><input type="button" class="button" onClick="this.parentNode.style.display='none';this.parentNode.parentNode.childNodes[0].style.display='block';" value="Hide spoiler"><br>Ocelots are sinister beasts bent on world destruction, and as such we need your help in taming these creatures! Just grab a taming whip and some anti-ocelot armor and join the club! <!--spoiler--></span></div> Long Version: <div class="spoiler"><input type="button" class="button" onClick="this.nextSibling.nextSibling.style.display='block';this.style.display='none';" value="Show spoiler"> <span class="spoiler_content" style="display:none"><input type="button" class="button" onClick="this.parentNode.style.display='none';this.parentNode.parentNode.childNodes[0].style.display='block';" value="Hide spoiler"><br> Greetings comrades in arms and ocelot-taming whips. We of the Order do cordially invite thee, fellow master of the ocelot, to join us in creating a new world order where the ocelots take their rightful place as our ever-obedient servants. We of the Order endorse any and every would be Ocelot Tamer. It is through such devotion that we have been able to make our rightful stand, together as brothers, atop the world's stage. Recently the natural Ocelot populations have begun surging and with it, ocelot-related violence. Whole cities are being overturned as wild Ocelots rampage throughout the lands, terrorizing the citizenry of South and Central America. Order must be brought to these fearless beasts, and the iron fist of Ocelot-taming might must be brought down upon the savages! We of the order endorse tamed Ocelots and their masters, but we by no means stand for the wild savagery of such ferocious felines. The devastation of the South American countryside has reached such new highs that many countries fall to shambles, become backwards nations and corruption and vice consume their Ocelot-ridden governmental systems. The damage has spread as far north as Mexico and now the Ocelot Army has been seen approaching the border to Texas. If something is not done, the Ocelots will conquer all of the Americas. These Ocelots have come a long way from the early days when they were hunted for their fur and put on the endangered species list. However, through sheer willpower, these felines have overcome the threat to their survival and have banded together an organized federation of Ocelot principalities throughout South and Central America. in 1996 after being taken off the endangered species list, these furry felines have made a complete comeback and now seek revenge on their former hunters. Such terror and devastation have not been seen since the days of the Mongol Horde, where some 75 million people lost their lives. The United Federation of Ocelots has even allied themselves with the Grand Consulate of Manatees and received aerial support from the Kingdom of Buzzardom. The Ocelot Horde has even extended peace accords to the European Union and curried favor in the Chinese and Japanese governments. All of this has been in anticipation of isolating the United States from its allies to slowly suffocate us into submission. It is because of such events that the Most High Order of Imperial Ocelot Tamers was formed. The Order stands to check Ocelot dominance by controlling their members. We have already made gains in converting their followers to our side. We of the order do not condone the Ocelot's actions, however we also do not condone the brutal slayings of Ocelots by the more proactive warmongers in the United States Congress that seek to completely and swiftly exterminate the Ocelot threat under an iron heel. We of the order must prevent such happenings by taming these feral beasts into refined and elegant members of society. However, the process of taming Ocelots is extremely dangerous and thus we have set up a list of rules that one must follow in taming Ocelots. 1. The use of nuclear weaponry on Ocelots is considered excessive force and thereby banned. 2. Protective anti-Ocelot armor must be worn at all times in dealing with Ocelots. 3. Ocelot flaying, burning, frying, skinning, bludgeoning, carving, decapitating, puncturing, and severing of limbs are banned in France, but legal in all other areas. 4. Fried Ocelot with spaghetti is delicious. 5. Excessive use of ketchup when eating Ocelot-burgers is banned. 6. All Ocelots are not created equal. Please abide by these regulations in any and all dealings with ocelots.<!--spoiler--></span></div> Before closing this page, gaze deep into your soul and if there you do not see your inner Ocelot, then I can say nothing more to stop you from leaving. But should you look deep enough, there you will surely find your inner Ocelot eagerly waiting for you to tame! This club is not only about Ocelots, but self-improvement! Club Titles: <div class="spoiler"><input type="button" class="button" onClick="this.nextSibling.nextSibling.style.display='block';this.style.display='none';" value="Show spoiler"> <span class="spoiler_content" style="display:none"><input type="button" class="button" onClick="this.parentNode.style.display='none';this.parentNode.parentNode.childNodes[0].style.display='block';" value="Hide spoiler"><br> Grand Headmaster of the Order of Ocelot Tamers - <!--link--><a href="http://myanimelist.net/profile/masterhoopla">masterhoopla</a> Master of Ocelot Rehabilitation for Misguided Ocelots - <!--link--><a href="http://myanimelist.net/profile/Metroid_Ex">Metroid_Ex</a> Kind Mistress of the Tsundere Ocelots - <!--link--><a href="http://myanimelist.net/profile/Tsuruya-san">Tsuruya-san</a> Princess of the Snow White Ocelots - <!--link--><a href="http://myanimelist.net/profile/Rub_My_Fanny">Rub_My_Fanny</a> Head Priest of the Holy Temple of Ocelots - <!--link--><a href="http://myanimelist.net/profile/iTom">iTom</a> Dances with Ocelots - <!--link--><a href="http://myanimelist.net/profile/Alindul">Alindul</a> <!--spoiler--></span></div> Allies of the Order: <div class="spoiler"><input type="button" class="button" onClick="this.nextSibling.nextSibling.style.display='block';this.style.display='none';" value="Show spoiler"> <span class="spoiler_content" style="display:none"><input type="button" class="button" onClick="this.parentNode.style.display='none';this.parentNode.parentNode.childNodes[0].style.display='block';" value="Hide spoiler"><br><div style="text-align: center;"> <img src="http://www.thecommonwealth.org/Shared_ASP_Files/UploadedFiles/%7B50418ABD-8A62-4A38-A94D-E1FD1E5F736D%7D_Australia.gif" border="0" /> <img src="http://www.ansci.wisc.edu/jjp1/ansci_repro/misc/project_websites_08/thur/monotremes/platypus1.jpg" border="0" /> <!--center--></div><!--spoiler--></span></div>