xTheMentalist's Blog

Character: Miko and Tony
Setting: Track Field

(Tony and Miko walking towards the field)

Tony: So remind me again why I have to join you in meeting Mr. Mendoza?

Miko: Simply put, I am afraid of him. And I suspect him to be a child molester.

Tony: Maybe, but you’re not a child. A child is a pre pubescent person who watches teletubbies. You are a guy who hangs out in the library to watch porn.

Miko: I was studying. And it was your mp4.

Tony: Exactly, you could’ve asked. I would’ve lent it to you.

Miko: I was studying and decided to listen to music. It was my surprise, as well as the girl’s next to me that instead of 2PM, I heard Maria Osawa moaning. And why the hell is it turned so high and the ear phone doesn’t work. I was banned in the library and had a chat with Mr. Hiyan.

Tony: You listen to 2pm?

Miko: That’s not the point!

Tony: Relax. The earphone has been broken for weeks and so is the volume of the mp4. That is why I don’t use it.

Miko: You could’ve said that to me before I was scolded by the librarian and laughed at by Mr. Hiyan. He said next tym use a psp!!!

Tony: You didn’t asked!!! I would’ve lent it to you!!!

Miko: Damn you.

Tony: You gonna cry now.

Miko: No, you’d like that.

Tony: So what do you like about 2pm again?

Mr. Mendoza: Hello boys. Welcome to the track field Miko. I believe this is your first time here and the semester ends next week.

Miko: I had the case of the dungue, sir. I gave you the medical permit.

Mr. Mendoza: I read it. And I also read your record. This is your third P.E. class that you will fail. That is a problem.

Miko: I failed all the physical exams, sir.

Mr. Mendoza: I see. You are a turnip.

Tony: What’s a turnip?

Mr. Mendoza: A vegetable.

Tony: I see.
I don’t get it.

Mr. Mendoza: There is nothing to get but a passing grade. Miko, what is the game where you hit a wooden ball with a mallet through hoops embedded into the grass playing court?

Miko: Croquet?

Mr. Mendoza: Correct. What is a wrestling move which consists of one wrestler picking up his or her opponent off the ground and then using a large portion of his or her own body weight to drive the opponent down on the mat?

Miko: A suplex?

Mr. Mendoza: Correct. How long is the starting line used in track and field races?

Miko: 5 cm?

Tony: And you listen to 2pm, really?

Miko: Why?

Tony: Those were in the finals last week. Only a few people got it correctly. Maybe Berry and some other smart guys.

Mr. Mendoza: Indeed. And they’re physical exams were barely passing. So in theory, you are as smart as them, Miko but too lazy to study and too dumb to hide porn in public.

Miko: So you know about it too.

Mr. Mendoza: That is not the point. The point is Miko, I have a way for you to pass your physical. Look over there, what do you see?
Tony: A wall.

Miko: With a bullseye painted on it.

Mr. Mendoza: You see, P.E.’s goal is to hurt your body. And you skipped that with a very life threatening disease. But I have a solution. Run a lap in the field and then run towards the wall. Easy as that.

Tony: …..

Miko: You want me to run into a wall voluntarily.

Mr. Mendoza: Yes. And running a lap will get you momentum which will hurt twice as hard when you crash into the wall. Do this and you pass P.E.

Miko: I prefer a pedophile teacher over a sadistic one.

Mr. Mendoza: Me too. But my ex-three wives will tell you otherwise. So run the lap and break a bone.

Miko: I hate my life.

( Miko changed into his shorts and did a crouching position so he can start the lap.)

Tony: Ok Miko, the wall is your enemy. First befriend it, then gain its trust and then beat it. Focus!!! You can do it, don’t mess this up. Just-

Miko: You wanna run the lap too??

Tony: No.

(Mr. Mendoza readies the signal and Miko runs the lap.)

Mr. Mendoza: He is fast.

Tony: yeah, but why is he closing his eyes?
MIKO OPEN YOUR EYES!!!

(Miko keeps on running with hiseyes closed that he forgot to turn at the designated corner and runs into a pole immediately knocking him out.)

Tony: …..

Mr. Mendoza: I take it back, he is not that smart.

Tony: That’s better than a wall though.
Mr. Mendoza: Look closer boy, it’s a fake wall. I had the drama club fixed a fake wall out of Styrofoam and painted it like a wall. I wanted to hurt him mentally not physically but I guess either way works. Tell him he pass P.E. Congratulations.

Tony: Wow…..you’re mean.
And that was better than tv.

(THE END)