emperortopaz's Blog

Nov 2, 2017 7:56 AM
Anime Relations: The iDOLM@STER Cinderella Girls 2-shuunen Kinen PV, The iDOLM@STER Cinderella Girls, The iDOLM@STER Cinderella Girls 2nd Season, The iDOLM@STER Cinderella Girls: Anytime, Anywhere with Cinderella., Cinderella Girls Gekijou, Cinderella Girls Gekijou 2nd Season
This is the Four-hundredth-sixty-sixth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*Topaz and Ririchiyo are riding with Ranko in a limo, sitting across from the chuunibyou idol.*

: Psst! Topaz! The blog's began!

Wait, already? We're still on our way to where Ranko's boss will meet us!

: You speak the truth, Emperor of Topaz. But do not think that your journey there shall be uneventful, as I shall plunge this blog into the darkest corners of hell!

: Hell? What are you talking about?

I think that she means that she wants to be talked about in the blog on the way. And judging by how plot works, we'll end near our destination.

: Nya ha ha, seems that thine knows thy destiny. Forsooth, make haste and drown in darkness by my side!

: I take that as a "yes". But knowing Topaz there will be another girl popping out of nowhere just to fill time.

I don't think that any other girls could fit in here.

: Um, I'm wondering why I had to come with.

*Rider, who had been offscreen all this time speaks up.*

: Do not think that our memory of you is forsaken, Perseus. I shall force you to apologize to the dark lord herself!

: I told everyone that I hate that name!

: Wait, why is that?

Perseus is the hero that defeated her. I do wonder why they used that name.

: Possibly because names like "Medusa" or "Gorgon" would have made it too easy.

: Do not give into temptations, Emperor of Topaz! Today is not the day of Perseus, and instead I implore you to invoke the chant of this fallen angel!

: I still have no idea what she's saying...

I think that Ranko is giving me permission to talk about her, even if she's being impatient. But since she allows it...



: I find it pretty amazing that you can understand what Ranko is saying.

: Hmmm? Are my words of power too burdensome for you?

I think it's because I've had experience with that sort of personality.

: Ah yes. I believe that in school you kept saying you were an alien and made up your own species.

: Nya ha ha? So it seems that I am not the only one who has drank ambrosia and seen the true path?

I don't know if "drinking ambrosia" is a good way to put it, but I did have my share of chuunibyou when I was younger. Now I just write stories about anime girls and stuff.

: Speaking of which...

I know, I know. Let's begin!

Head
Hair: Ranko does have pretty good hair, but there are some problems. First I'll talk about the good things: One will first notice that she has a very fitting, unique hairstyle. She has twintails, with the bottoms being a little drill-like. I might have liked them more if they were entirely drill-like, but considering her hair when down is wavy I still find them nice. Her twintails also start around the upper-rear of her hair and reach about to her shoulders (if not a little bit past). I like her cute ribbons as well which are at the base of them. Ranko's face is nicely framed by her sides as well, which like her twintails reach about her shoulder. When her hair is down it looks like her hair reaches her mid-back which is a nice length (and as mentioned before it's wavy which is nice).
Ranko does have a few bad things that you could probably predict. I'm not the biggest person on twintails, but I will say that hers are fine how they are. Her bangs are a little generic, with a standard long middle bang as well as being parted over her left eye. And since you can imagine since I haven't mentioned it, I'm not a big fan of Ranko's gray hair. Now, I'm not against gray hair in general. I just mean that it doesn't seem to suit her well. It just looks a little bland considering the type of character Ranko is. Plus black hair would have been great with her red eyes. Overall I do like Ranko's hair, but she isn't as great as I can imagine her to be. Though at least it's better than Anastasia who has a similar hair color (Ranko's is darker) but without the unique style.
Grade: B

: How astonishing. I would have thought that you would approve my unholy locks.

I do, though I suppose that might have sounded a little meaner than I may have intended. I apologize for that.

: I'm sure that he would bow for an apology, but since we're inside a moving vehicle it may not be for the best.

Anyway, I do like your hair but it's the color that's a little plain. I do like how the light reflects off it at times and it's quite bouncy as well.

: Harumph, it would seem that you do not understand true culture when you see it! Not that you would know good hair, one who looks as if Samson lost his strength!

Ooo, nice burn! But enough talking about me, as it's your day. And with that let's continue!

Eyes: Ranko has some really incredible eyes, especially on certain cards. Her eyes are a beautiful red color and in many of them they're a dark red which is really pretty too. The gradient from black to red just looks so brilliant! Her eyes are also shaped well, with a tsurime and a strong inward slope which I enjoy as well. Her upper lid also frames her eye nicely, and I don't mind the eyelashes in the corner as they just accent it a way that makes her even more appealing. I also like how they're shiny-looking, which looks pretty as well. She also has noticeable eyebrows, but nowhere near the point where they'd be pointed out for jokes or something. Overall Ranko's eyes are extremely beautiful, and it's a shame that unlike Yurika she doesn't wear glasses (at least as far as I can remember).
Grade: B+

: Nya ha ha! Seems that my eyes have hypnotized you, forcing you to become my slave!

: Just because he likes them doesn't mean that he'll be your slave.

Right. Keep that for Zettai.

: Oh? Trying to use a decoy to distract my immortal eyes? Do not underestimate me! I shall make you quake in fear from the might of my third eye!

Now you should REALLY keep that for Zettai!

: Especially as we're currently trapped in a motor vehicle.

: Hmm? What's all this about third eyes? Do they have a power that matches my mythic eyes?

Well, third eyes DO have the ability to make a certain part of my body like stone... Especially yours, Rider.

: Thank... you?

: Topaz! This is no time to make jokes!

: Indeed, for the seventh planet from the sun is filling me with it's power! My third eye can barely contain it!

*Topaz giggles.*

Well, let's hope that you don't hit us with the might of Uranus then.

: Topaz! Stop being immature!

Fine then, I guess we'll get back to the blog.

Face: Ranko has a fairly standard face, especially for the franchise. This doesn't mean that it's bad though, as I appreciate the fact that she has a small nose and she looks pretty cute. Her face is also acorn-shaped and as mentioned before it fits well with her hair. And of course we can't forget all the cute expressions Ranko uses, such as the teary-eyed cute one that's on MAL at the moment (in her pictures).
Grade: B

: Nya ha ha. It seems as though you cannot truly perceive the beauty of my visage!

It's just that A-1 does have a derpy way of doing things, and the mini series while cute doesn't show off your face to its full extent.

: And like that's the only problem with the mini series...

That's true too. Boo picking the week AFTER I talk about Ranko to finally have her appear in this season! They should have just taken out the previous episode instead of forcing five weeks of Cute idols and making probably Passion only have three rather than the 4/4/4 that it should be.

: It would be quite fitting for one such as I to have an episode on All Hallows Eve as well.

Exactly! Now, what were we doing again...

: Don't be so lazy, Topaz!

If I was lazy would I be writing all these in-betweens?

: It is true that we are conversing quite a bit during this blog. Is this normal?

: A special child such as myself deserves a spectacular blog, one that shall be quite memorable!

: I just hope that by "memorable" you don't mean you'll cause lasting mental scars by releasing your "third eye".

*Ranko pouts.*

: Grrr, now that I have been informed by what that means it causes my heart to fill with the fury of a thousand suns! Stifle your mockery!

True, we shouldn't keep picking on Ranko like that. Besides, I have a blog to continue!

Body
Build: Ranko is pretty good, but she does have a pretty big flaw. As far as measurements she is 156 cm and 41 kg, and her three sizes are 81/57/80 so her chest is slightly bigger than her ass. It's pretty insignificant, so that's not the flaw. The problem is that Ranko doesn't really show off too much. With such somewhat-bland measurements it's not like she gets a lot of fanservice, either in the cards or the anime. The most is that she has some nice navel shots on certain cards, but she really needs to show off further appeal. Like how Yurika showed off her ass. Sadly, even if Ranko's body is good and matches well with her age the problem is that she just doesn't show off enough.
Grade: B-

: Thou are just angered that I did not sting my bottom like that vampire. Perhaps if I showed off my posterior it would improve my ratings?

: It's alright. You can call it an "ass". In fact it's encouraged.

And as good as seeing your ass would be, it wouldn't improve or be counted in the blog. This only includes canon information and the like.

: So are you saying that such scenes would be superfluous?

They would still be interesting to see, I suppose.

: I approve of giving your readers something to enjoy, even if shall enjoy plummeting to the depths of Hades yourself!

What's that?

*In one swift motion Ranko lifts her skirt and shows off her sexy thong Chuunibyou ass. She then pulls her thong down and pulls Topaz's face againnst her now-bare ass. She pulls up the thong.*

Hey! W-what are you doing?

: Since you did not think that my a-ass was worth talking about I shall show you how glorious my gate of Babylon is!

: That name sends shivers down my spine, for some reason...

*Ranko then sits down, facesitting Topaz's trapped face. He wriggles himself out.*

: Hmm? Were my namesake rank aromas not up to your desires? Or should they have been more putrid?

: I think that your ass was smelly enough. Instead, you confused Topaz and Zettai again.

: Perhaps I was indeed mistaken.

Still felt great, though. You'll have to do that with Zettai when he does your blog. But that is for another day, for now let's continue onward.

Chest: That said, Ranko isn't exactly busty either. She's about average-sized and as a result doesn't have any horrible busty moments, at least in the anime. There's a few cards that show cleavage, but that's more due to the outfits she's wearing though they aren't exactly mamocentric either. Overall Ranko's biggest problem is that she doesn't have any memorable moments.
Grade: B-

Clothes: Helping out the past two areas Ranko does especially well here. She tends to wear a lot of frilly gothic lolita outfits which are quite great, and as an additional accessory she carries around an umbrella sometimes. Other outfits include all the idol outfits she wears, an angel costume as well as a devil costume (seems she took a visit to PriPara right there), a kimono, a race queen, and various fantasy crossover outfits such as from Granblue Fantasy. Overall I'm probably forgetting some but Ranko's outfits are one of her most charming points.
Grade: A-

: Hmmm? I think that we skipped a spot there.

I don't think that there was much to talk about there. But do know that Ranko's clothing is great!

: Most certainly. My garments are those that allow me a closer touch with my vampire body.

: I wonder why, between girls like Yurika and Ranko, why chuunibyou idols like goth lolita.

Probably because they're a gothic horror.

: That or they just like the looks.

: Perseus is correct, though do know that such apparel is just a disguise for my mortal being to observe without rousing suspicion.

Still, they all look so good! Speaking of looking good, let's continue with Ranko's blog!

Mind
Personality: Ranko is a very cute chuunibyou and one of the most famous examples. She uses phrases for common sayings and can be hard to understand by the characters on occasion (often a translator is necessary). She also says that she has magical powers, and she sketches her ideas in a sketchbook which also works as her diary. She's usually shown to be a skilled artist, though I imagine that varies depending on what story they need to use. However, like most chuuni this hides the fact that Ranko is a shy girl with low self-esteem. This gives her the appeal of a dual-persona type in a way, which is quite nice. She wants to get rid of this side of herself forever, but luckily the Producer wants to make sure she doesn't lose that side of herself. She does speak of corrupting angels and vampires, but don't confuse that with the fact that she enjoys the horror genre. She's even very scared of ghosts and would cower in the corner if forced to watch one! Ranko mainly enjoys the elegant feel and gothic look of vampires than the horror aspects. She also is a bit of a loner as Rosenburg Engel (her unit) is the only solo unit, though she does sometimes perform with Love Laika. She also breaks her character to give the other girls a pep talk, though she claims that's the spirit of an another angel speaking through her.
Ranko is voiced by none other than Maaya Uchida. Yes, this is the same Maaya who does Rikka's voice from Chuuni series, which makes it perfect for the chuunibyou Ranko. Her singing voice is quite great as well. I also like Ranko's cute "Nya ha ha" laugh, even if it doesn't seem to be popular online. Some other roles by Maaya include Koito from Phantom World for another KyoAni series and Sharo from GochiUsa. Overall Ranko is a really adorable girl and she deserves a lot of screentime, which is a shame as in the second season of the main series she gets pushed to the side.
Grade: A-

Libido: Sadly Ranko doesn't show too much libido in the anime. There's some slight bonding with Anastasia when she has to fill in for Minami, but other than that she seems to be a loner. There are other girls she talks with, especially the girls at her dorm like Syoko or Ko'ume (though Ranko is a little frightened of the latter's hobbies). Ranko may also have some interactions in the games that I don't know of, especially with the producer, but the only thing really big is that she doesn't let him read her sketchbook/diary when it comes to things about him.
Grade: C

Well, since we have her here why don't we talk a bit more with Ranko?

: Nya ha ha. What matter do you wish to augur with my powerful magics?

I want to know about your romantic feelings.

*Ranko becomes flustered.*

: R-romantic? An immortal like I does not have need of such frivolous pleasures of the flesh!

That doesn't mean that you can't have some feelings. You're not a robot!

: And being fair in anime that won't completely discount you either.

: I know not of which you speak! You must be speaking the tongue of the gods to perplex me as you are!

I just want to know your feelings. Especially about the Producer.

: W-what? S-stop! I don't w-want to talk about that!

*Ranko is red and her arms are flailing around.*

: I'm impressed that Topaz managed to get a straight answer out of her.

True. And I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I can see now that I was stepping out of line.

*Ranko adopts her normal cool persona.*

: So this was just an ordeal? Seems that I passed with flying colors, not that I expected an immortal like myself to be flustered by such carnal d-desires.

Age: Ranko is only 14. It shouldn't surprise me as much as it did, considering that puts her in the chuunibyou range, but for whatever reason I thought she was older. Not by much, but I guess I was projecting Rikka's age (well, her being in high school at least) into Ranko. Her birthday is also April 8th.
Grade: B-

: Oh? Sounds like you underestimated the years my mortal vessel has been wandering the Earth. Perhaps you expect me to truly be thousands of years old, as was my former life?

Not quite. It's not like I was expecting you to be too much older. It's just surprising to know you're a year under Mio or Rin, and three under Uzuki. I was thinking that you were a high school girl, but I guess that's just Rikka. It doesn't help that you aren't too different from the average build of the Cinderella Girls idols either.

Total Grades: 71
Average score: 7.9
Final Grade: B

And that's the blog for this week!

: Seems underwhelming. I had expected a fellow chuuni to be able to appreciate me more!

: In all fairness you did beat Uzuki and Yukiho. Among others, but those are probably the two you'd know the best.

: Nya ha ha. Even though your ally may judge me better than you I shall accept your score.

: What good timing, we've arrived at our location!

: Wait, Rider was driving this whole time?

She does have a good Riding skill, so it's presumed that she can drive properly. Plus it keeps me from having to write more parts.

: Your laziness knows no bounds. But we have arrived at the gateway to your punishment. Follow me closely, and I include you as well Perseus.

: I told you I hate that name!

*Ranko leads the other three out of the limo. They seem to be at a big concert hall, though it doesn't say who is performing. Still, it's very lit up and looks very Vegas-like.*

Wow. So this is where we were going.

: Looks like they spared no expense to make sure that this month will be a showstopper.

I just hope that it's not the blog-stopper that they expect it to be-OOF!

*As Topaz is admiring the lights and bustle of the hall he walks into a familiar girl.*

Sorry about that-hey, aren't you...

: W-what? What are you doing here, Topaz?

I thought it was you, Rin. We haven't seen you in a while

: Not that we expect to see girls that often after blogs, but still. Anyway, what are you doing here?

: A friend of mine is performing. I came here to support her. What are you here for?

: We are here to visit JPEG and to force Topaz to battle in a contest for the rights for his blog.

Wait, you're not the one that's going to test me?

: Sadly no. I was only the chariot to transport you to this promised land. With this my assignment is over.

Well then, good luck with whatever you're doing and good bye.

: I should probably leave as well...

: No, JPEG mentioned that she required you to meet her as well, Perseus. Now, the three of you enter the forbidden area!

*Rider sighs as her, Topaz, and Ririchiyo enter a door.*

: Wait, isn't that the door to the stage?

*As the trio enters the stage lights come on. They seem to be on a stage in front of many people.*

What's all this now?

*Fog rolls in as if by a machine from the sides of the stage. A shadowy twintailed girl descends from the stage on a crescent moon prop, though her identity is silhouetted.*

: What's going on?

Either we have to fight an Earth Dragon or we knocked out the lead. I, Topaz, the world's premier blogger, will save Maria!

*The girl on the moon starts talking.*

???: Enough of your foolish talking, why does everything out of your mouth sound so stupid and awful?

: JPEG! So it is you who has planned this public humiliation!

Wait... Her voice sounds familiar...

JPEG: That's right, Perseus. I was the one who sent you to butter up Topaz! And now, I have no use for you!

*With that JPEG waves her wand, hitting Rider and causing her to disappear.*

Oh no! She disintegrated Rider!

: I'm more worried what would happen if she were to use that on us!

JPEG: Do not worry. If it had that kind of power you would not be standing there. This only dispels summons.

But I didn't summon Rider. She attacked Topaz in her sleep!

: That's accurate but easily confused...

JPEG: I never said that YOU summoned her. Specs has become even more powerful since your last meeting. Although Perseus was not agreeable at first, Right and Left Frames were able to... persuade her to our side.

What monsters! Torturing an innocent meganekko like that!

: Occasional meganekko, at least.

JPEG: It matters not. All of this, from Month-kun and Infamy to Cacophony and Liepard. All of them, my minions. Even though Specs is hiring your former adversaries she knew not to forget about me. I am the one that you have scorned the most!

Scorned? What do you mean?

JPEG: Do not make me repeat what that ABOMINATION of a blog you gave me was like! I even scored less than a SNAKE GIRL!

: Miia?

JPEG: NO! Well, yes but while still troubling I mean the more recent example!

W-wait. I doubt you're Cirno so there can only be one person that it could be...

JPEG: That's right, Topaz!

*JPEG jumps down and stands as Topaz says her name, revealing her identity.*

Chinatsu Yoshikawa!

: I'm surprised that you remember me after all these years. Now I can finally get my revenge, and I have a helper for just such a situation...

*Another twintailed teen emerges from backstage.*

M-MADOKA?!

: The goddess? I thought that she had an alright blog. Though I suppose that we should be watching for wild Homus.

Not that Madoka. Madoka Amahane!

: It is good to finally meet the one who not only wronged my master JPEG but also muscled his way into my close friend's dressing room for a blog.

*Rin, who was in the audience all this time, runs up to the stage.*

: N-no! I did the blog because I wanted to! Madoka, you don't have to defeat Topaz for my honor!

: Honor or not, Topaz needs to pay for what he has done.

: And you shall show Chinatsu just how much you have changed by scoring ME. Then we'll have a contest and you'll surely lose!

Sounds like next week will be the season finale, so be sure to watch as I talk about Madoka!

: Wait... It seems like we're off by a week. Hopefully there won't be a demon emerging from her like last week.

I'm not THAT predictable... am I?
Posted by emperortopaz | Nov 2, 2017 7:56 AM | Add a comment
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