I woke up to find I was in an old house deep in the snowy mountains. They said I was carried into there with my head being bruised. There were a mistress, who was surrounded by books and pictures and loved camera, and the four maids who smiled sadly. They seemed to know everything. However, I couldn’t remember anything.
“You brought the time into this house where time had stopped”.
The gear began to work as if it was led by the folklore of spiriting away talked in the candle light. At midnight, the big clock that had stopped for decades rang thirteen times.
When a dark blue shadow crawled out from the depth of the well were wandering around, snivel of the maids came in the dark. Was it an ecstasy or else?
Ok. Tokineiro, also known as A Time To Screw. This review may have spoilers, but what the hell do you care? It's a hentai =P
Quite an interesting premise that this show is based on, you'd think that it would reflect into the overall presentation, but you'd be sadly mistaken.
The first episode of this show really sets a nice tolerable tone for a complex storyline, there's a lot of the "what just happened?" situations. Now, normally, if a series is going to go for the complicated storyline, they'd at least explain in better detail why things were happening, unfortunately, 95% of the time, random events
occurred to which there was ZERO explanation.
Ok, so you're thinking "so what if the story is bad? it's a hentai, get over it." You'd be right, in most cases. Sadly, not in the one. For the most part, the art inconsistencies aren't really noticable in the first episode, but the second episode is plagued with bad coloring, horrible lines and just really awkward art.
The sounds. HAH! I usually don't have beef with sounds, but the VAs really overdid their parts. Too much unneccessary screaming/yelping etc. The really only thing that saves this from a lower score is a half way decent orchestra BGMs.
lol wut? This has to be the most confusing character development I've ever laid eyes on. One girl is crippled, but really isnt. One girl has a split personality, to which there's no explanation, not even a subtle hint at it. And I understood why there were 2 Setsuya clones, but what was the point of the third one? He was just staying in his room...
Well... in all honesty, a lot of the stuff that happened DID make me LOL, but that's part of the problem, this show is supposed to give off a brooding, mysterious feel, and you just can't help by laugh at some of the events that happen.
Horrible attempt at a hentai OVA series. There are better ones out there. Don't waste your time with this one.
"Nothing is nonfat. That's why the world is going to explode one day."
"nonfat? exploding world? what the fuck? is he crazy?"
Yes. Yes he is. His name is Pete Meat, and he dubs hentai.
After running a train on the world of laughter with "Sextra Credit", Media Blasters saw fit to buy up several more disgustingly misogynistic, filthy hentai and turn them into uproarious black comedies; among them was 2004's "Time to Screw". Headed up once again by the awesome Pete Meat and a bunch of voice actresses who couldn't give any less of a shit, Media Blasters prepared their second assault on the world... and
stuck their pinky in its collective asshole. (yes, the pinky line does make an appearance in Time to Screw too!)
Once again, the dub itself is the only reason to ever watch a disgusting show like this- because, like Sextra before it, the Japanese audio version is played straight and is a depraved, misogynistic power fantasy. The art is crap, and they have no value as any kind of... personal aid... but as a comedy, it's "Time to Score"- and only 10s in the scriptwriting and delivery department. Pete Meat is the single greatest hentai dub voice actor, ever. He hams it up, sounds totally disinterested, and then switches up and even sometimes comes off like he's disgusted with himself at having to read these lines! It's all for a ridiculous comedic effect though- and I laughed out loud more times at the creatively nasty humor than the Cleveland Browns create ways to lose games.
With lines like:
"Have you ever tried to fuck a box?"
"are you pregnant?" "why, do I look fat? I'll start a diet tonight!"
Which then led to the first quote
and "Can you imagine how many faith healers would be out of work if they knew about the powers of kinky sex?" - in direct quotation to an old woman miraculously being able to walk again after having sex with a maid.
I needed to change my pants. Twice.
This goes on and on for an hour- an hour of filthy sex acts involving a vacuum cleaner, a 3 course meal, a billiards set, a washing machine, and a wheelchair. You do the math. It's got bondage. It's got rough sex. It's got maid fetish. It's got FOOD fetish ffs! The maid girls in the sex mansion cover Pete Meat in all manner of food they cooked- steak, salad, pudding, casserole, everything- then proceed to vomit all over him (using it as lube) and then have sex with him. By the end of it, he looks like Pizza the Hutt, and I couldn't tell if I was tripping or just laying on the floor clutching my sides watching a hentai dub. If you can't find something to tickle your funny bone, you just have no sense of humor.
All told, "Time to Screw" is inferior to its stablemate "Sextra Credit", with its poor attempt at a mystery/mind bending plot vs Sextra's straightforward revenge plot, but it succeeds in all the same levels of quotability, hilarity, and sheer ludicrousness. But since I'm scoring this on the hentai scale (maximum being a 4, because they're all complete crap anyway), a 3 and my shining recommendation of the dub make this another can't-miss, 2sexual, black comedy romp that's worth the price of admission: your sides.
"And then there was the matter of time; Einstein and Oppenheimer, the theory of relativity, and the conundrum of big balls in your face. It was all a continuum, like one long winding turd, snaking its way through the universe. And, like a turd, the smell was not to be forgotten."
My rating for this show is based entirely on the English dub. I watched it with the sub and dub at the same time. They are as far as I can tell unrelated.
I don't know the story behind the people who dubbed this show. I like to imagine that it's a bit like Samurai Pizza Cats - if you don't know the story behind that show, its creators were given the show but not a script and had to make stuff up. In this case they probably had a translation, but the dialogue in the original version is so disjointed (read
the summary if you want to see what I mean, it's all like that) that they decided to just throw it out and rewrite it.
And their results were delightful. They created one of the most amazing comedies I have ever seen, except for the really disturbing sex scenes that happen occasionally. It's hard to explain the exact brand of comedy that works so well here without examples - a scene where naked girls in the bath debate the relative hotness of dead physicists, a woman reminiscing on the colors of her dildos as a child, a scene where a woman just lists things she could have for breakfast for a good few minutes. If any of that sounds interesting to you, it's a must watch.
This anime is fucking awesome, it is much better than Fullmetal Alchemist and Steins;Gate
"Have you ever tried to fuck a box"
First off, this hentai must absolutely be watched in English Dub for the full effect. The dialogue and voice acting is top-notch and very emotional.
You meet this dank man who owns a mansion and has three clones of himself. He fucks his maids non-stop and the maids are sex maniacs too. There really is nothing much to it, it's just a guy and a girl fucking each other hard? Whats more to offer!
Time to Screw really puts sex into perspective as it asks us, "what
do we find pleasurable?". It explores the different fantasies of a mankind such:
- Fucking a box
- Vacuuming a girl's ass
- Crude oil coming out of pussy
and much more!
"Nothing is non-fat, that's why we all all explode"
Please keep this in mind when going on a diet.
All in all, this hentai is fucking amazing, you will find it very entertaining, and hey? Maybe you'll find something new to do with your waifu!