"
Baman's Profile" the plaque on the door reads.
Opening it, you step into the room.
The small, tidy room is mostly empty, with nearly bare white walls and blue furniture,
with a window providing a good view to the Net outside.
In the middle of the room by the window, a young black-clad man sits in front of a desk.
shifting his gaze from the documents on the desk, he eyes you with a puzzled look.
"Oh, a visitor? Sorry, I'm afraid I didn't hear you coming" The man looks slightly
intimidating, with a sharply trimmed goatee and cold eyes.
Removing his Headphones and tidying his papers, he gestures towards the
empty chair by the desk.
"Do sit down, no need to stand there in the door."
You close the door behind you and sit down in the chair.
The man adjusts his glasses and assumes a
Gendo pose.
"So, what can I help you with? If you want to leave a comment, just drop them into
the post box by the door."
"Oh? You want to know about me?" He adjusts his glasses again and ponders for a moment.
"Well, you know, it's a bit hard for me to know what you want to know."
"Just the basics you say? Well, I can do that." He glances out the window for a moment, then continues.
"Well, I go by the name Baman. It's not a name with any real significance,
although it's origins might be a bit funny, but thats another story. I am a rather nihilistic and cynical person, and not really the most sociable kind, I can also be quite pretentious at times, and yes, I am an elitist indeed.
After finishing my military service, I found myself in Bergen (also known as "City of Torrential Downpours"). Having taken a one year Psychology study, I'm now on to my integrated Bachelor/Master study in Law. I also enjoy music, and I've got an office in
LastFM as well.
I am also, like my peers here at MAL, an Anime and Manga enthusiast, and as for
my preferences, I've got my favourite lists right over there, and my Anime and Manga lists are up there on the wall. If you want some recommendations, I think I can safely recommend anything I have given a score of 8, 9 or 10."
"Oh, that picture? It's a
Dugong. Rather peculiar creature, wouldn't you agree? It's been here on my desk since the last time I reorganized my Profile, so I thought, why not keep it?"
He opens a drawer, fishing out a file of documents. "These are the Anime and Manga Stats tables, although I must confess, I am unsure of how precise they are. Time flies by when you are enjoying yourself, and suddenly hours are gone in what seemed like minutes. Funny thing that, how we perceive time differently under different circumstances. Now, where were I..."
He opens another drawer and reveals another pile of papers. "Let's see...Here we've got the favourite people list, the Club list, the Friend list, and...No, wait, the recommendations are over there, that's a bit odd. I have been reorganizing my profile recently, so things are a bit cluttered...Now. Ah, the Recommendations and the Reviews up there in the corner and lastly the RSS Feed. Never use that though."
"The Blog? No, sorry I don't really use that either. I did fill out one entry long ago, but that will most likely be the only one."
The man rises up from the chair and walks up to the wall with the door. He gestures towards the banners hanging there.
"That's my MAL Claim Banner. All this claiming is so tiresome, so I just went one step further. And really, everything already belongs to me. Have you ever seen the Dugong Ninjas watching over you as you sleep? Well, they have seen you. Of course, when people do find out the truth, things get pretty hectic around here. Lincoln and Elvis were easy enough, but Hitler managed to kick up quite a fuss before my aquatic assassins got to him."
Baman adjusts his glasses and points at the next banner.
"That's the Banner for the "Club for The Appreciation of Hellsing" It's a Club I made back when the whole Club system was still a novelty. It's gotten quite a number of members now, and if you appreciate Hellsing as well, then you are more than welcome, just register at the Club Office at the second floor."
"And this is the Banner for the Claymore Club. It's a club for the Claymore Manga and it's admittedly mediocre anime counterpart, not for Claymore proximity mines or the swords. Just so there's no confusion."
He walks back to the desk and sits back down in the chair.
"When it comes to friend association requests, I will assume most people requesting such have already interacted quite a bit with me, and if not, I would appreciate it if they leave a word or two as to why they request such. In the event that nothing is said beforehand, I do expect a return of my initial greeting, and failure to comply will result in the
termination of the contract."
"So, I guess that's about it. Unless you wanted to know anything else?"
"Well, here's my card, for future reference"
"Nice to meet you, enjoy yourself here at MAL. Oh, and please, do close the door when you are leaving. The draft makes my club banners blow away all the time you see..."
Baman adjusts his glasses and returns to his documents as you disappear out the
door and back into the corridors of MAL.