Ranked #2832

Shi ni Itaru Yamai (Manga)

"A person can't exist alone. What makes a person is the relationships they have with others... Those people reflect your true nature. It means that a person alone can't prove they exist.

That's why people hurt themselves, and hurt others just to prove that they exist. Screaming "Someone please notice me! I'm right here!" They're all running away, trying not to be swallowed up by the dark nothingness."

Shi ni Itaru Yamai, which roughly translates as Sickness Unto Death, is a 2 volume long psychological manga that started in 2009. The story is about a young man who has just started college, studying clinical psychology. He stays in a mansion under the condition that he must tend to an ill person when necessary. This person is a girl with hair turned white suffering from a very serious psychological disease. This disease is slowly killing her, not only psychologically but physically as well. According to her, she's suffering from a terminal illness of the heart called despair. Our main character ends up involving himself with this girl while trying to save her from her own mind and maybe even her true self.

First thing that must be said - this is not realistic, as you probably got from the part where the disease caused her hair to turn completely white. It is a manga that blends real but exaggerated psychological problems with philosophic matters (to be precise existentialism).

It has pretty good dialogue. It raises some interesting questions and the main plot point is very interesting. But I can understand that it'd be easy to see it as pretentious. It tries to juggle complicated questions and issues, but never actually manages to explore them completely or efficiently. On the other hand, it strives to make the reader think and question himself about the true meaning of existence. Not physical existence, but existence as a whole. To do this the author used a couple of psychological diseases (such as Dissociative Identity Disorder and Depression).

The search for something that confirms our existence as a singular unique entity in this planet. The goal of existing in someone else forever as a memory. I can't say any more or I'll be giving away the twist of the story.

Should you read this manga? Well it depends. I definitely think it isn't something everyone will enjoy. I think you shouldn't go in with too many expectations as it isn't an overwhelming piece. But if you want a simple and short psychological manga that poses some philosophic questions, I think this won't be a waste of time. Try and think about the points it raises and the threads they leave hanging. Reflect a bit about the true meaning of existence.

Thank you for reading and I hope I've helped. I didn't feel like such a simple manga with just 2 volumes required a bigger review so I'll leave it at that. read more