Yaoi/Shonen Ai (Anime and/or Manga) with Equal Positions in Relationship?

AngelShiva said:


I can't disagree more with you. And by the way, real life doesn't (always) work like that...

Anilapse said:
Thank you for the suggestions, everyone...I'll look into those ASAP.
I just don't like applying those kind of roles to LGBT+ relationships, as I am also one, I like reading manga/watching anime that I can resonate with. It's a very similar feeling to when people ask IRL, "who's the guy/girl in the relationship?"
Umm...no, because we're not a hetero couple?

yaoi_renee said:
I would think calling a relationship "unhealthy" because there's a bottom and a top that don't reverse roles is what's really unhealthy. I guess this is why the gay community can never be unite in one. We're all judgmental afterall -.-
And with that said, I'm not trying to attack anybody, but I think it's quite unhealthy to be indecisive and can't set yourself in one role.

Anilapse said:
I'm not judging your taste(s), though, yaoi_renee. That's totally fine for you to like what you like. Not being the 'opinion police' or anything here.

AngelShiva said:
And I still can't get why healthy relationships are so hard to find in the yaoi genre... -_-'

omniomi said:
Totally hear you... On top of that I much prefer the relationship depiction in bara but I like the characyer style of yaoi/shonen ai more. Yaoi has such unhealthy relationships in general.

omniomi said:
It's not the bottom/top dynamic that's unhealthy. It's the seme almost always forcing themselves on the uke even when the uke is verbally protesting. I know lots of gay couples that are top/bottom with no versatility but I don't know any gay couples with the weird absuive dynamics of yaoi couples.

In my example of Nowaki x Hiroki their relationship is unhealthy because Nowaki basically forces the relationship on Hiroki in the beginning and when Hiroki does comes to love him Nowaki is an emotionally distant dick so much so that he fucks off to another country without saying anything for over a year and expects Hiroki to immediately pick back up when he gets back. In Yaoi the top is always super dominant and almost always an abusive asshole. You can be a top without being abusive and power-bottoms are also a thing.

yaoi_renee said:
I'm a feminine man myself, so of course I'm extremely happy with the yaoi material where I can relate to the uke being feminine and the girl in the relationship and I want my boyfriend to be manly and the one who protects me and all that.

yaoi_renee said:
Oh, I apologize if I have made a mistake. I actually deleted that post already after realizing what people were saying, but I still have to disagree. Not all seme are abusive. Actually, most of them aren't, unless you've been reading a lot of yaoi hentai :p

omniomi said:
What I don't like is that "no" means yes and most of the tops are abusive either emotionally, physically sexually, or all three. I hate the way it portrays tops and constantly shows bottoms being abused. I watch how Usami treats Misaki [Junjou] for example and all I can think is "come live with me Misaki, I'll treat you properly" I can't relate to Usami at all

omniomi said:
I have yet to see healthy top/bottom relationships in yaoi but my exposure is rather narrow. I thought that's what this thread was for though? I am not OP but what I would love is a list of healthy top/bottom yaoi relationships they do not need to be vers/vers.