lalazoe's Blog

Female Characters (in no particular order):



(Idk why the hell I have so many more female favs than male.)

Male Characters (also in no particular order):






Favorite RL t.v shows:

Warning: the content contained in this blog may be disturbing for some, but that's why you're here...isn't it?

Ahhhhhh the sweet sight of a man being ripped apart by a naked girl with invisible arms, the impenetrable chills that come from watching a boy beat two of his friends to death with a metal baseball bat, these horrific parodies of human mutilation can be found often in anime or manga. If you are like me you understand the inexplicable sick, twisted enjoyment that comes from watching these actions. If you are disgusted by it and can't bring yourself to watch/read even a sliver of "Elfen Lied" or "Higurashi", then you better read on. Trust me- you won't regret it.

Let's get the basics down. Take a deep breath, and try not to focus on your gag reflex.



^This is an excerpt from a page of one of my favorite manga, "Goth". You want mutilation? This image pretty much sums up what crazy sadist serial killers do. But what's so enjoyable about this is, in fact, the disgusted feeling you get in the pit of your stomach. It's so disturbing and graphic that you want to look away and forget it was ever there. Well I got news for ya- the world ain't made of puppies and marshmallows and this terror happens in real life. What makes gore so fantastic is that really allows the reader/watcher to gain a sense of death. It's not pretty. But it is fascinating. From a psychological standpoint humans are born with a natural curiosity about what's underneath all that skin and bone. You know what's underneath all that?
This is:

Now that you know the basics, let's move onto the actual enjoyment

Wincing as you click on the spoilers? I used to be just like you. It was when I was 9 years old and I watched "Silence of the Lambs". For those of you who don't know what that movie is, it's about a guy named Hannibal Lecter who eats people. I was disturbed beyond belief. I couldn't believe how much blood there was involved with death. I had only been exposed to the death that was peaceful- you know, the kind where the old man dies in his sleep but closes his eyes beforehand. I asked my Mother if that was really what happened when people got hit really bad and she had no choice but to me "yes."
The reality of gore is that it is a part of life. Someone gets run over...you can bet there's gonna be some insides spilling out. Someone gets stabbed, they bleed excessively. I'm not asking you to love gore in real life. That would mean you were a "sadist". I only like the gore in movies and in anime/manga because it is more artsy and more bad ass. That's the simplest most important thing about being a gore lover: you feel like a bad ass.

The final lesson.



.....-_- still feeling disgusted? Then you may be unable to ever become a true gore fan.
In closing, I want you to understand the difference between a gore lover and a sadist.
Sadist=enjoys making physical pain for people/observing RL physical pain.
Gore lover= enjoys gore in anime/manga or movies and understands that the chills they get from seeing disturbing images is much like the chills you get whilst watching a scary movie.

Thanks for taking the time to read this. If you are now pepped up and ready to watch/read some really gory A&M, pay me visit on my profile. Good luck!

If you are like me (and I'm assuming you are since you are the proud owner of an MAL account), then anime/manga is a part of your life. It may not be a large part, or a very time consuming part, but a part nonetheless.
and that most likely means you know about the stereotypes and stigmas that are attached to being said fan. You're either proud of it and have no problems hanging out with people IRL that share the same interest, or you still don't keep it a secret but at the same time you don't go promenading around in people's faces saying you like it. Or you're a closet anime/manga fan. You hold the secret close to your heart and only include yourself in anime sites online. You are worried that people will attach you to that "smelly, icky, socially-awkward anime nerd" stereotype. You see these stereotypes, and you steer clear of them because you have actually seen anime "nerds" around school or college that fit this stereotype. You don't want to be ostracized.
Welcome to my world.

There was a time, yes, when I was open about my never-ending love for anime. I decorated my room with Studio Ghibli posters and went to Borders ever once and a while to buy manga. But things changed. I saw how people reacted when I told them I was into anime and manga.

"That's so weird" or "you're not Japanese". "Only dorks read that stuff".

Fervently, I cleaned myself of anime. The posters were ripped down, the manga books were stuffed into a far corner of my closet, and the random knick-nacks were thrown away. I was just a normal girl again. The amount of friends I had did not change (I was relatively popular for being a "nerd") and no one really asked about it anymore.
My anime cleansing did not last long.

Now, I'm a Senior in High School and I've been a closet anime fan for 5 years. I use the internet to watch, to read, to discuss. On the internet I am no longer afraid to reveal this aspect of my interests. I have, basically, a whole different (secret) life on the internet.

At school I see the kids who are open anime "nerds" sitting alone in the library. And yes, it brings me shame to say that more than one of them wear trench coats. Students laugh when on the morning anouncements they say that the "Anime club will be meeting after school to eat 'culturally aware snacks' and watch films'. I flinch every time. But I laugh with my friends anyways.
I'm a traitor


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
STORY TIME!

On Monday I was with my best friend and her boyfriend at Borders. We had sat down on a couch somewhere and my friend was reading the first chapter of a book that she was having second thoughts about purchasing. We were near the manga section of the store, and a small gaggle of High School girls were crowding near one shelf laughing.
My friend's boyfriend leaned over and whispered "dare me to go over there and ask them which one is best for 'beginners'?"
He smiled. There was nothing I could do but nod my head.
He managed to make it half way to the group of girls, when he turned on his heels and ran back holding his nose.
"God, I couldn't even stand the stench!"
I recoiled. "They can't smell that bad! Stop being such a stereotypical ass!" I protected the girls.
"Ok, fine. You go over there and see."
I got up, marched in their direction, and sniffed openly. To my disappointment, the gaggle of girls smelled strongly of B.O.
I walked back, and sat back down on the couch. He grinned.

"I used to be an anime nerd, y'know", I whispered.
He narrowed his eyebrows. "No way. You?"
I nodded.
"I used to come in here when I had 10 dollars to spare and buy manga whenever I could."
My friend's boyfriend couldn't believe it and busted up laughing.

But then he stopped. "This is great, because I used to be an anime nerd too."
Now I was the one in disbelief.
"I used to be obsessed with Naruto. When it first came out that is, my room was decked out in Naruto stuff" he laughed.
"Why did you stop?"
It felt sad to ask him that.
"I don't know. I guess I just had better things to do with my life than look at stupid graphic novels. It takes over your life, y'know. Those girls over there have to read their manga and obsess over the guys because they'll never get anything better than that. They all fit into that stereotype. I'm not generalizing."

I didn't say anything after that. Was that what I was? Someone who didn't have a life and obsessed over dumb characters because I'd never get anything better? I wanted to crawl into a deep hole somewhere.

It's not melodramatic; it's the truth that this is a huge problem I face. Should I tell my friends and risk them making fun of me (or worse) or stay "in the closet"?

Stereotypes are inescapable