emperortopaz's Blog

December 25th, 2014
This is the Three-hundredth-seventeenth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

: Welcome back everyone. As you can see, Topaz is busy playing video games... *sigh*

*Camera pans to Topaz playing video games on his computer.*

Oh, sorry. I didn't notice you all coming in. Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas everyone! Unfortunately this is also the last Thursday of the year, so this is the Yearly Meganekko blog. If you're looking for the Christmas angel traditional blog, that was last week.

: I won at the video games! *shakes head* Wait, don't get me distracted! It's about time for you to start your blog this week?

But it's the holidays! Last time Christmas day fell on a Thursday I took the week off!

: But now you have a more dedicated fanbase, they'll be angered if you skip a week! Or, more appropriately, he would.

That's true... But fortunately I'm talking with the very girl I was thinking of blogging about today.

: So that's why you're playing GUNBROWN the video game!

There's some grays, for realism. But indeed, isn't it about time for you to introduce yourself?

*A blue haired girl turns towards the camera. She seems to be wearing a revealing outfit and has a big sniper rifle.*

???: *Sigh* What do you want me to do now?

I want to talk about you for my blog.

???: I do owe you for grinding all the materials for my weapon crystals. Sure, go right ahead.

: Wait, how can she be talking?

Computers are awesome! But going into the blog this Christmas day...

: Hopefully you don't mind that I'm talking with my virtual avatar.

While I do prefer your real version, this is fine.

: How about a small taste then?


Hair: As Sinon has two versions (technically three, but you'll understand), I'll go over each separately. Well, in separate paragraphs at least. First off is Shino's real life hairstyle. She has short brown hair, not even reaching her shoulders in the back. The sides are somewhat long, extending past her shoulders. They also have ribbon or tape on them, for decoration. She also has a fairly deep bang, reaching her nose or at least between her eyes. It's sometimes pointed to the side, though it's not consistent.
Sinon, however, has a more fantasy-based hairstyle. First thing you'll notice is that it's much lighter, being a light blue rather than a brown color. Otherwise the design is mostly the same; the long bang, long sides, and short hair are all present as well. In fact, other than maybe her cat ears in ALO (ALfheim Online) or the color the hair is pretty much the same. Maybe a small amount longer, but overall it's almost exactly the same. Another difference would be that, instead of tape, she has what seems to be gun clips or some other type of FPS-style clip in GGO (Gun Gale Online) (they're replaced by tape when in ALO, though it is a different style, more X-shaped than a simple tie). She also has two hair clips on her bangs, but it's not easy to notice. Overall I like her natural version more, mainly due to the darker color. I would have liked more differences between the two, but that might be asking too much of the Sword Art Online writercharacters...
I should note that in the web version she had a drastically different appearance. In one version she had darker blue hair, but with two very small twintails off each side of her face. She also had longer, more voluminous hair, with most of it reaching her neck. A second version had purple hair and was similar to the previous, but was more realistically cut with a partial hime. Also, in the game “Infinity Moment” she seems to have a hair color closer to her real hair.
Grade: B-

Eyes: Shino's real eyes are a lovely brown, much like her hair. I do like when hair matches eyes like that (usually). She does have sort-of tarame eyes, though they're more of a chestnut shape than anything. Both versions have a similar shape though, as A-1 isn't exactly the best when it comes to faces (though I'll get to that next). Sinon has aqua eyes, also matching her hair or so. The pupil is also unusual, with a big black mark in it. This holds over to ALO when her arc ends, but in that it's a darker blue. It might just be my dark preference, but I like that more than the GGO.
Of course, we can't forget that Shino wears glasses! She's the meganekko of the year, after all. Sadly her virtual versions don't have this aspect. You'd think that there would be eyeglasses in the two games she played, there were some in Sword Art Online after all! Then again there's likely an explanation for this: Shino does not need her glasses. Well, for vision at least. In fact her eyes are better than the normal person's, to the point that she can see twice as good as them! The reason for her frameless pair is actually that they're miniature bulletproof shields. Explanation for this odd fact will come later, but do know that I like her glasses.
Grade: A-

Face: Both versions, again, are mostly similar. In fact, I could probably get away with putting the two together. Shino has a nice, simple face and I like the fact that she has a small nose and features. It's a bit softer in the manga, at least from the little I've seen. She also has a bit of a potato face at times, not looks-wise but shape-wise, but that's A-1 pictures for you. Nothing against Shino though, she does show a lot of nice emotion in her face and overall is a good character. I especially like how they portrayed her younger bite, but I'll describe that later.
Grade: B

: Man, do you always put things off until the last moment?

: Yes, usually because he's playing video games or something else.

Don't tell them my secrets!

: You two are both so silly... Also chestnuts are topical, considering what day it is.

Certainly, though I'd hate to see your eyes roasting.

: Topaz assures you that no eyes were hurt in the making of this blog, as well as the club comment. Also, aren't those the things that wake up a sleeping Pokémon?

Those are Chesto Berries, but basically the same thing.

: Let's not get distracted.

Are you that anxious for me to talk about your... body?


*Shino slaps Topaz's avatar.*

Okay, I deserved that.

: You did say it in the creepiest way possible, even if it's not as easily apparent with text.

Exactly, but for now let's hop into the next part!

Build: Both Shino and her virtual versions are pretty similar. She has a slender build and, including measurements, is 161 cm tall and her three sizes are 80/61/81. As you can tell, her butt is slightly bigger than her chest. Whether it was on purpose or not, SHIRIno became known as a butt girl. She shows it often, and a lot of her fanart is of her backside. I imagine it helps that she's a sniper which usually have large butts (for some reason). She even gets a scene where Kirito, the lead, grabs her cat tail in ALO and shows that it's sensitive. Sadly this is the closest she gets to a good “butt scene”, so no jiggly butt like Nanael. Her legs also don't look too bad, and her body in general when scene in her underwear scene looks really nice!
Grade: A-

Breasts: As said before, Shino is slender and has an 80 cm chest. While this might seem big, it's not compared to some of the other characters. Shino pretty much only beats the token loli Silica in chest size (and probably Yuuki as well). In general, her chest is modest but it's also not that she's flat either. She just seems to have a more developed backstory, is all.
Grade: C

Clothes: Again, there's some major differences between real life and video games. As Shino she usually wears her school uniform. It consists of a white shirt, black or brown blazer and skirt (hard to tell the exact color), and red necktie. For obvious reasons I love Shino's school uniform, and that's not even counting the moe shirt occasions when she's playing games by herself. Because GGO is in the colder months, maybe, we get a lot of her in winter clothes. I especially like her scarves.
Speaking of scarves, her GGO avatar also wears one (a white muffler). It looks epic, at least for me. Otherwise she wears a desert colored military jacket, bulletproof armor and combat boots of the same color. She also seems to wear a white and black leotard under it, with tight shorts that occasionally show buttcrack. Under that she seems to wear matching black sports bra-ish top and panties. She also carries around her sniper rifle, “Hecate”. In ALO she wears a green and white rangerlike armor. Sadly it's not as butt-showing but she does have the added tail which was pretty cool.
Grade: A

: My butt shows? Why doesn't anyone tell me these things?

I can imagine one reason...

: Not everyone is as butt-loving as you and Zettai, Topaz. (D-does this mean I should wear more skimpy outfits? Maybe Chiaki knows of some pointers...)

I meant because she kills them too quickly.

: I suppose that's a good point. Plus as a sniper they don't get a good look at me.

: Wait, did you just do two rear-heavy girls recently?

BUTT of course!

: And you've done a lot of Yukarin girls, including Hiroko?

Yeah, but I don't get what you're getting at...

: Are you SURE you're not turning into Zettai?

I'm pretty sure. He'd give Shino a bigger score for her slim chest. Even if there's nothing wrong with it. Besides, I'm sure next week you'll realize the differences...

: That doesn't bode well *sigh & facepalm*.

: I wish people would stop bringing up my body.

Don't worry, that part's done. Now it's time to talk about your personality.

: But there's things there I don't want known either!

By sharing those things I think you'll get better about those things!

: *sighs* FINE then. Talk about me, but you owe me more game time later!


Personality: Shino is definitely a kuudere at first. She doesn't have really good social skills and is mostly emotionless until she starts to open up to Kirito. Unfortunately as a result she becomes more of a tsundere, but currently she's a quiet but put-together girl. Not in a bad way, but there's a reason she's called the “Ice Cold Sniper”. I liked the motif of the first ED of the second season, with her against ice. It portrayed her personality very well. That said, while usually calm and reserved she does change when angered. While hard to approach and not exactly outgoing, she's a friendly sort of person. The other girls do seem to look up to her cool personality.
In GGO Shino plays a sniper, able to shoot from a long distance. She does jump from the top of a tower in an epic moment that's completely idiotic, but still she's skilled enough to tie for first in the third GGO tournament and second in the fourth. In ALO she plays a Cait Sith archer, again being more of a ranged attacker. Sadly she's not as fancy as the sword or magic users, but at least she can attack adjacent targets! (Maybe.)
I loved seeing Shino grow as a person, though. You see, before the show starts Shino killed a man. Yes, as a child she shot a robber, biting his hand to get the gun away from him and shot him in various places, one of which was in the forehead. This was enough to traumatize her, giving her a very violent fear of guns. It got to the point where bullies would point their fingers at her in a gun-like shape and nearly make her vomit. Seeing an actual gun DOES make her vomit, though fortunately they don't show it. I really like how they portrayed her fear, not just saying it but showing how it has effected her mental state. However, even though she wasn't charged for murder she was shunned by others for killing someone. Even her mother seemed to dismiss her, giving Shino a major complex. Before Kirito the only person Shino could confide in was Kyouji, a childhood friend. Kyouji was also the one that got her into GGO, hoping that being around virtual guns would help her phobia. However, that wasn't a great relationship...
Shino is voiced by Miyuki Sawashiro. Not one of my favorite VAs, but she does a good job at bringing Shino out. Hilariously she's not the only MURDERnekko by Miyuki Sawashiro I've done this year (just look at the Meganekko Day blog). Emphasis added for the pun, not for cruel intentions.
Grade: A

Libido: At first Sinon thought that Kirito was a girl due to his girly-looking avatar. Once she started to change (into other clothes) in front of him he finally reveals that he's really a guy. She becomes mad towards him, not getting better until near the end of the arc where they spend a special moment in a cave. However, even though she warms up to him she's not actually a love interest. Well, I suppose in the SAO games she is a valid girl, but as far as the story goes she's not as major as Asuna is. And Shino is fine with that, preferring to tease Kirito than actually compete for his favor. One moment that stands out is when she uses her archery skills to get the Exalibur back to Kirito and tells him to think of her each time she uses it.
The other “love interest” Shino has is Kyouji. While he does lust for her, this leads to terrible, terrible things. I won't spoil what happens, but this arc happened right after ALO so two consecutive arcs ended with near-rape left a bad taste in my mouth.
Grade: B

Age: Shino seems to be 16, at least as far as the Phantom Bullet arc goes. We do see her younger in her backstory, but I don't mind.
Grade: B

Total Grades: 78
Average score: 8.6
Final Grade: B+

: Hmmm, that's not a great score...

Well, it's not too terrible.

: Still lower than what I got. (Oh dear, I hope she doesn't think I'm bragging...)

: I see then. Then again, I suppose that there's a reason that you're his assistant and not me.

*Shino laughs merrily*

Right, though in your case it would be more of an ASSistant...

: Are you saying that I'm not- er, not that I want to be, you disgusting pervert.

: Well then, you'd better be careful that I don't snatch up Topaz under your nose, Ririchiyo.

: Hey!

: Catch you both later. Bang!

*She makes a gun with her fingers and “shoots” before logging out of the game.*

Well, that's the blog for this week. Hopefully everyone enjoyed it.

: Right. Next time will be a new year, which means that Topaz will do his seasonal meganekko choices. Hopefully he can stop playing video games before then...

I make no promises!

Posted by emperortopaz | 12-25-14, 11:09 AM | 0 comments
December 18th, 2014
This is the Three-hundredth-sixteenth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

Welcome back everyone! Ahhhh....

*Topaz relaxes in his chair.*

So good to be back alive.

: Technically you won't be alive until you do Shiki's task. C'mon it can't be too difficult to do one simple good deed.

I thought we did that already? Wait, didn't you mention something about a rogue angel last week?

: That I did.

Well then, tell us where she is and the girls and I will hop over and send her back quickly.

: Didn't even ask us for permission, yet we still have to help?

Yes! Or do you want to see me go back to the underworld?

: Well...


: Joking, joking. Besides, we'd have to find some other rube- er, host, to stay with if Topaz left.

Exactly! Wait...

: Joking of course.

: *sigh* This arguing seems so familiar somehow. You all should learn to get along better. Why don't you all just get going. Here, I'll even show you where to find here.

*Botan hands Topaz a sheet with the mysterious angel's location on it. He and his assistants all go there, only to find a blue-haired angel laying on a couch. She's eating chips and watching a huge screen television.*

: Nyahahaha! This is the people Heaven sent for me? It's just a bunch of little girls!

: Hey! I'm at least an adult!

: At least there's ONE guy. But he looks so scrawny.

: I'm not a-

: I think she meant Topaz.

: Oh, right.

So how about we get you to go back to heaven?

: Are you kidding? I can't relax like this in heaven. They keep giving me more work!

: Well, maybe if you actually did your job, and PROPERLY, you wouldn't get so behind.

I think she'd have a huge behind even if she did her job. But on that topic, how about you battle us? You can even choose how we fight.

: But fighting doesn't suit a beautiful archangel of my statue.

You can choose another type of competition then.

: Hmm, then let me think about it.

: Can Topaz do your blog in the meantime?

: Oh! I've heard about that! Laila told me you did her a few weeks back!

That was actually Zettai, but close enough. Does that mean that I have your permission?

: Of course! The world deserves to hear about how AWESOME I am!

You heard her then...

Today's girl is:

Queen's Blade

: In the meantime I shall take these potato chips, and ... *crunch crunch crunch*

: Hey, that's not how the meme goes!

: Whazza "meme". *crunch crunch*

Hair: Nanael has very short hair, looking almost boyish as it barely even reaches her shoulders. And that's just the sides as the back isn't as long. To be fair though the back also curls up slightly, though not quite a "curl" as a wave. It's a bit difficult to describe. She also has a pink clip in her hair. Her hair is most often seen as a light blue color, which I do like but I'd prefer it darker (out of preference to dark hair, not that Nanael looks bad). In her "dark" form her hair appears pinkish or red, and while I appreciate the differences I like the blue better as it balances with her eyes more.
Grade: B

Eyes: Speaking of Nanael's eyes, we move towards that direction. Her eyes are pretty nicely shaped, especially compared to the more mature-designed characters. They do have a tarame though, so they're not too perfect for my tastes. Color-wise they're nice; in her normal form they're a nice green while her "dark" form, rather than go the route of "red = evil", are more of a blue shade. Blue eyes fit angels well, but it's a shame her hair color never matches her eyes.
I don't think Nanael ever wears glasses in the main series, or at least that I can remember. However, in her combat book she has a single image of her wearing some red under-framed glasses. They don't fit her too well, but I'd never complain about additional glasses fanservice.
Grade: B

Face: Nanael does have a pretty cute-looking face. She's one of the most baby-faced characters in Queen's Blade, at least before Rebellion came out. Her face is somewhat puni-ish as well, not as much as some other series but moreso than some of the more serious characters. She also has a small nose and has a lot of emotions, which helps her to be comedic.
Grade: B+

Build: Nanael has measurements!

Background noise sings: Hallelujah, Hallelujah!

Hey, could you turn that down? I'm trying to do a blog here.

: It's not MY fault you're doing it so loudly! I'm trying to watch television here!

You're not interested in hearing what I think of your body then?

: Not really. But if you insist I'll listen to your dumb monkey thoughts.

That's all I ask for. And I'm not a monkey! Anyway, getting back to Nanael's measurements. She's 162 cm tall and her three sizes are 84/57/82. This sort of puts her in the "loli" category as far as Queen's Blade girls go, even if her chest isn't too small. Her personality helps, I suppose. Anyway, like many other Queen's Blade characters Nanael has a stellar body. Of course, I have to mention that she's an angel. As a result she has two wings, but one is much larger than the other (which is a topic she doesn't like to discuss, but it's been that way since birth). Her wings are mainly white, but in her dark form they turn black. She's got some well-defined curves and shows her body often. Her legs are pretty nice, but it's hard to tell about below her knee due to her high boots. Heading slightly higher, however, is her BEST feature; her butt! Really, Nanael has a lot of butt shots, especially in her combat book and official art. It's big and looks great in general! It even JIGGLES at one point, though that's in the Queen's Gate games (still counts). Unfortunately her butt still has a smaller measurement than her bust, not all angels can be Laila I guess. Though both angels DID get a nice offical post-spanking image.

Stop arguing with yourself, Nanael!

Grade: B

: Are you SURE you're not that "Zettai" fella? You did point out my butt, say a lot about it, and even his assistant was in that image!

All coincidences, I'm not Zettai. Right, girls?

: Right, you're not Oniisama-er, Zettai- at all!

: I'm still not convinced...

Perhaps the NEXT area will be proof enough.

Breasts: 84 isn't too bad, but my limit for "large breasts" tends to be 85. This is unfortunate for Nanael for multiple reasons. Her breasts aren't actually too bad. As said before, if they wanted her to be a butt-focused character they really should have made it bigger or her chest smaller, but having her be a butt girl with a small difference isn't too bad either. That said, the series Nanael is from has some of the stiffest compeTITion possible. And I'm not talking about a certain "stiffness" they cause in me xD. But indeed, the other Queen's Blade girls cause Nanael to look like a teen in comparison.
Grade: B-

Clothes: Nanael has a very pretty outfit, at least to me. It's a white angelic gown with a short skirt, and while the shoulder straps are thin this is explained by the fact that it doesn't have a back. It's not too outlandish either. Not only that, but the skirt is so short nearly all of her butt is shown. She does wear panties though, and surprisingly they aren't striped but rather spotted (I'm sure there's a joke about her panties always being SPOTTED here somewhere). She wears some armor as well, but nothing that blocks a vital organ as it's just thigh-high boots (usually white, but in "dark" form they're black) and a single gauntlet. On her other hand she wears a long glove. Around her waist is a belt, and on that belt hangs her "Holy Milk" bottle. I'll get to that later on, though. Overall it's a nice, somewhat modest (for Queen's Blade outfits) clothing choice that fits her well. Sadly she doesn't buy underwear with Laila though. In Rebellion she tends to wear a more battle-bikini looking outfit, looking like a cross between a Dragon Quest character and a magical girl (the latter being more in the boots).
Official art has some other outfits as well. One is basically a dark version of her usual outfit, no doubt cosplaying as Dark Pit rather than the actual one. There's also what seems to be dark-pink pajamas with a nice hat, a Santa outfit, and a red gothloli-looking dress (this was an eyecatch as well). Finally, sadly she wears her usual outfit in the Omakes rather than a schoolgirl outfit but she does wear a spotted bikini (though the top could use some more support).
Grade: B

: You can't count all of those outfits! They're fanmade!

They were put into an official fan book, I can count them.

: Your rules are strange, Topaz.

That they are, not even I know all of them. Though I am glad that you're calling me "Topaz". What made you realize that I wasn't Zettai?

: It's simple, Zettai would honor my modest bust over my costars.

: Plus he'd probably have some fanservice by this point...

You say that image wasn't fanservice then?

: You've got a point...

Personality: Nanael seems to be a friendly character, but she's kind of a jerk at times as well. She'll take advantage of people's kindness and really doesn't think highly about anything on earth. That may be due to being an angel though, as they all seem to think a similar thing. Speaking of being an angel, while Nanael thinks she was sent down to bring order to the world, she's actually been banished and is on a trial as punishment for causing so many messes. She has a bottle of Holy Milk that she can't cover or spill, but being the klutz that she is it slowly drips away. She tries to fool people by adding other milk, which leads to a silly festival event where she keeps getting the wrong fluid put into the bottle. This doesn't work on her superiors, so Nanael gets punished with a different sort of trial-by-milk. The second was connected to her strength, so when it was nearly empty she was almost powerless. Normally she's a bit overpowered, but it was funny to see the "weak" battle between her and a hungry Airi. In battle she uses telekinesis to make her weapon move on its own as she doesn't think humans are worthy of a fair fight. She also has other attacks, which may or may not be based on mecha attacks (such as her Falling Star Kick looking like Giga Drill Break).
Nanael is voiced by Aya Hirano, which is sort of unfortunate. Not that it's a bad voice for Nanael, even if I'm not all that fond of the higher pitch of it. It's more a fault of the VA's personal life. Due to medical issues in 2011-12 she didn't have as many roles as before. The problem is that this made Nanael completely disappear for Rebellion, the third season. It also made her appearance in Vanquished Queens that much more surprising, showing a positive sign for Nanael in future Queen's Blade products.
Overall Nanael isn't really my sort of character. She's a bit too hyper and manipulates the other characters (and not in a sexy way). Her huge ego is annoying at times as well, and it gets worse when she's promoted to Archangel (there's a reason Laila prefers being on earth). Her voice also bothers me slightly, and she's made into a comedic character most of the time. She's not bad, though, I just prefer a lot of the other characters in the series. The second season did help my opinion of her, as the first usually had her pushed into a B-plot only to show up late or otherwise miss announcing the battle properly (it was a running gag that got a bit tiresome). The second season made her seem less like a jerk though, as she really did appreciate how close she was becoming to Melpha (maybe).
Grade: C

Libido: Nanael has a surprisingly high libido. She wants a harem of male servants, though not necessarily for "feeding" purposes like a succubus. At least as far as the anime is concerned. You see, a lot of her libido gets played down in the anime (at least from what I've read). She'd want to get with any guy she can lay her hands on, though I'd wish she'd be more selective. Not that I dislike her trying to hit on Rana, who is a shota, but that's more Airi's area of expertise xD.
Grade: B

Age: It's unknown how old Nanael actually is. As an angel she could be any age, but since she seems to be a young adult or older teen I'll judge her based on that.
Grade: B

Total Grades: 69
Average score: 7.7
Final Grade: B-

: Nyahahaha! I see that my blog is completed. That means that you'll have to face my angelic wrath!

Well, that is what we promised. What sort of battle were you thinking?

: Hmmm, let's see... I know, how about THIS!

*Nanael holds up a fancy new game console.*

Where did you get that?

: Let's just say that I borrowed it for such a competition. But for now we're going to play Smash!

*All four gasp in amazement.*

: Wait, do you mean all four of us facing you?

*Nanael hooks up the console with her telekinesis while answering.*

: That I am. However, I'm going to be playing with four lives while you guys only have one each. Plus, as an additional handicap I get to choose who you play as!

: Hopefully we all get someone we're good with.

: Speak for yourself, I haven't played this game before and I don't think Riri has either.

: I've played a little, but not much.

: So it's just me then?

: Maybe if you played something other than Pokémon...

: Hey, this Stuntank isn't going to raise itself!

I'm sure we'll be fine. I don't think Nanael knows how to play either.

: *giggles* (Those fools won't know what's coming...)

*The game starts up and Nanael hands them their controllers while getting to the multiplayer mode.*

: I want to be Snake!

He's not in this version.

: I call foul! Zettai's version had them!

: Are the only things you know about this game from that one blog?

: ...Maybe.

Hopefully you know well enough to keep yourself alive then. But getting to the game, what characters were you planning on having us use?

: Nyahahaha! I was hoping you'd ask that. Here, let me do that. *uses Topaz's controller to point to Donkey Kong.*

Oh hey, I'm not too bad at him. Why do you say-

: Because you're a big hairy ape like him!

That's not very nice.

: Harumph, but it's true! Now for the other Topaz's... *uses Kimiko's controller to point to Diddy Kong.*

: Oh no, I'm not good at him! Though I guess you gave me him because he wears a similar hat.

: NOPE! It's because you're like Topaz only smaller.

: What do you mean by- HEY!

: Now, let me select your character, Rika.

: You should have her be Wario. You know, for the obvious.

: HEY! Stick a cork in it!

: I'd try, but I'm afraid it would shoot out and hit me in the forehead.

Split it up, you two. We're here to make sure I become alive!

: You don't want to spoil Topaz's chances, now do you?

: & : Noooo....

: You can fight all you want among yourselves, but here's your character *uses Rika's controller to point to Jigglypuff.*

: Hmmm, I recognize this. With this I'll easily destroy Dragon-Types. Especially Giratina!

Yeah, but Lucario's Iron Head is Super Effective and Charizard takes reduced damage, unless it has the Final Smash.

: Curse this anti-Jigglypuff roster! At least I'd be good against that frog. At least tell me the final smash is Bigglymuff so I can eat people who check their Pokédexes.

Sadly no.


: And now for the last competitor, not that it matters. I'll annihilate all of you anyway!

Don't be too sure, I've gotten out of tougher situations!

: You haven't faced ME yet. I am invincible! But enough trash talk. *uses Ririchiyo's controller to point to Mr. Game & Watch.*

: Harumph. I'm not too terrible at this retro character. But might I ask why you chose him for me?

: I think the reason should be obvious, but you share a lot of similarities....

*The camera pans down to Ririchiyo's DFC, and then to Nanael bouncing her larger chest.*

: HEY!

Don't worry, you're still lovely to me!

: I-I don't need your pity, Topaz. But thank you

What was that?


: Enough arguing, it's time to play *uses her own controller to point to Palutena while returning the others to their owners.* Of course, as I deserve I'll be playing with the goddess herself. Of course, her looks pale in comparison to my own. Now, let's get going!

*Nanael selects the Big Battlefield and the game begins.*

=== GAME START ===

*Topaz starts by rushing Nanael's character. Kimiko stays back, ready to back him up while Rika and Riri try to learn their characters.*

Aha! Let's see you survive this!

*Donkey Kong claps at Palutena, which knocks her back. He goes to keep it up, but she stands and kicks him somewhat.*

: Don't underestimate a goddess like me!

*Palutena shoots a standard shot at Donkey Kong, pushing him back.*

: Go forth, HOLY DIVE!

*Palutena uses Angelic Missile, sending Donkey Kong backwards. Palutena is hit with a flying sausage for some damage as he recovers.*

: Don't forget that we're here to back him up!

: I don't fear your roasted wieners, you 2D character!

*Topaz giggles.*

: Oh, grow up.

*A bomb-omb appears at Palutena's feet.*

: Perfect! *picks it up and tosses it at Game & Watch.*

*However, Topaz heroically dives in the way, getting blown upward and getting KO'd.*

: That's one! Here I thought he'd be the longest-lasting one, what a joke! Now nothing can stop me!

: That's what you think!

*Diddy stops biding his time and launches at Palutena, grabbing her face. He then punches her and pushes her back.*

: what's that, you think you can defeat me?

*Two items appear on the stage. Palutena rushes over to the Ore Club while Diddy quickly goes after a bonus flag. Jigglypuff also goes after the club, but Pautena hits with it first.*

: Wait, this gives me an idea. Do you two think you can distract her long enough for me to use this?

: I'm getting smacked, but I think I may be able to.

: I think I have a good grasp on this game now.

*Jigglypuff and Game & Watch assault Palutena, both figuratively and literally juggling her with an array of grabs, Sing, and bug spray. In the meantime Diddy gains an additional life from using the bonus flag.*

: So that's what that dumb flag does? I should have gotten that instead!

: Oh, don't worry. I'm not keeping it for too long... NOW!


*Topaz uses Kimiko's bonus life to return, surprising Nanael. In fact, he's nearly able to KO her with a fully-charged special punch. She's able to recover, but just barely.*

: Seems that you're better at this game than I though. But I have a few surprises too!

*Nanael imbues the controller, and then the console itself, with her holy energy. Palutena also glows, similar to a Super Star.*

W-what? That's just cheating! I call a rematch!

: You can't have a rematch just because it doesn't go as planned, Nyahaha! It may have taken a lot of my holy milk, but if I can't be defeated it'll be worth it! I'll have you in my harem in no time!

: She's right, I can't damage her at all!

: I can still interact with her, but what good will that do?

Hmmm, I know what we can do!

: That desperate? Well, I will tell you this is only for this life. But if you can't defeat me now that's all that matters!

*DK grabs Palutena and puts her on his back.*

: W-wait, you can't damage me like this...

Yes, but you have enough damage now that it'll be hard to escape. And now...

*DK jumps off the edge of the stage, with Palutena unable to wriggle free. Both are defeated.*

: Hopefully we can find another bonus flag now.

*Palutena returns, but everything stops glowing.*

: Grrr... Well, at least I got rid of Topaz like that. Hiyah!

*The fighting continues, with neither side getting the upper hand. Until...*

: Finally, a home-run bat!

: How dare you pick that up before I do! I want it back!

: Well then, I'll let you HAVE IT!

*Diddy swings the bat in an epic fashion, hitting Palutena out of the arena in one shot.*

: Now that is how you do a home run!

*Palutena returns, but stands suspiciously close to Diddy.*

: Eh? Want more then? Well then...

: That's a trap, other-Topaz!

*Indeed, as when Diddy swings the bat he's met with a counter blow, instantly killing him instead. Diddy's bat falls to the floor and disappears.*

It's just down to you two then...

: I think our chances just went down, sadly.

: That's what you think. As is custom, I'll use my deadly poison on her!

But Jigglypuff doesn't even get Toxic in this game, Rika.

: I mean THIS!

*Jigglypuff leaps at Palutena's face and uses Rest. However, while she did get a flower planted on her head Palutena instead just strikes the front of the screen, getting KO'd again.*

: That's just a fluke! Now that I'm on my last life I'll take this seriously!

: We're not beaten yet!

*Game & Watch uses his bug spray to combo Palutena.*

Good job Ririchiyo! Pump it harder! That's it... *notices Kimiko and Rika glare at him.* Aaaand I just realized what I said. My bad.

: I want to try something else this time.

*Jigglypuff uses Rollout! It's super effective, hitting Palutena away and nearly knocking her out. She manages to recover, grabbing the edge and attacking to climb up.*

: I knew those wings weren't just for show! Want more then, do you?

: Just try it!

*Rika uses Jigglypuff's Rollout again. However, at the last second Palutena dodges, sending Jigglypuff careening off the edge and to death.*

It's up to you now, Riri!

: *gulp*

*Palutena recovers just as a Smash Ball appears.*

: Finally! I'll easily defeat you with this!

*Both players chase after the ball, but Palutena knocks Game & Watch back and opens it. He falls off the side of the arena, but grabs the edge. Palutena lands on the flat ground.*

: Take THIS!

*Palutena uses her final smash, Black Hole Laser, and a large laser appears through the stage. However...*

: It.. Missed?

: Grrr! You're lucky this time, but this battle won't last long enough for another mistake like that!

: No...

*Game & Watch leaps from the edge and runs toward Palutena.*

: ...It...

*Game & Watch avoids Palutena's shots by running, eventually leaping at her.*

: ...WON'T!

*Game & Watch uses his Judge attack, hitting a "9" for maximum damage and sending Palutena flying to a KO. However, before the results screen appears Nanael unplugs the console.*

: Oh look, the game magically crashed! What a coincidence, guess we have to do it over.

: No fair!

That's right. We won, and your cheating won't be allowed!

: Oh? And what will you do if I don't listen?

: We'll dump THIS!

*Rika holds up Nanael's bottle.*

: W-what! How did you get that?

: I snatched it when you went to unplug the game. Now, if you don't want to be sent to hell for spilling this you'd better leave this instant!

: Yeah, yeah... Fine...

*Rika hands Nanael the bottle back as she slowly leaves.*

And get a move on too!

*Topaz smacks her big butt, making it jiggle.*

: Ah!

: You just wanted to do that, didn't you.


: I don't blame him, it's a delight to see Nanael leave. If you catch my drift...

: Stop looking at my butt, waaaahhhh!

*Nanael runs out screaming, eventually flying once outside. Botan, who is waiting on a nearby roof collects her.*

: Wow, they actually did it. I'm surprised.

*Botan takes her back to Shiki. In the meantime, Topaz starts appearing less pale.*

Hey, I feel healthier than ever. I guess that my good deed was completed!

: Good job Topaz! Now that you have a new lease on life, what are you going to do next?


:, : & : *Sighs in unison*
Posted by emperortopaz | 12-18-14, 10:38 AM | 0 comments
December 11th, 2014
Anime Relations: Yu Yu Hakusho, Yu Yu Hakusho: The Golden Seal, Yu Yu Hakusho: Mu Mu Hakusho
This is the Three-hundredth-fifteenth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*We join Topaz as he's playing with his Nintendo 3DS. Ririchiyo walks up to him.*

: Topaz! Isn't there something you need to do today?

You're right! This National Dex isn't going to fill itself!

: No no no. I mean something ELSE!

I should probably finish the Delta episode too...

: I don't mean that, I mean your blog!

Oh my, I completely forgot!

: Did you now, or are you just procrastinating?

A little bit of both. But welcome back everyone to my Anime Girl blog! It feels good to be back in the world of the living.

: People who don't read the story won't know what that means...

That's their own fault, they're missing out on a great part! Besides, if they don't read the story then they wouldn't be reading this, now will they?

: Um, er, that is...(Come on Ririchiyo, think of a good come-back...)

*Before she does a blue haired ponytail girl rides in on an oar.*

: So how is that good deed Eiki told you to do coming along? You'd better not just be sitting around playing video games!

*Topaz hides his 3DS.* Nooo....

: Don't think I didn't notice you playing it. *shakes finger at Topaz.* You'd best listen to her, or you're be shipped straight back to the world of the dead!

Yeah yeah... Say, Botan. Has anyone ever talked about how lovely you are?

: No, not recently. Not since Kuwabara found out about Yukina, anyway.

It's a shame. Hey, since I have to do an anime girl blog today why don't I do one on you?

: Such a charmer, you are. Well then, I give you permission to blog about me.

: Don't just accept that, he's just using you to procrastinate more... *smirks* Of course, since his blog is ACTUALLY getting done I can't complain. (Why did my heart skip a beat when Topaz called her lovely? My arithmia must be acting up again...)

Well then, now that we've decided on the girl it looks like...

Today's girl is:

Yu Yu Hakusho

: Hey, isn't that the show with the busty girl in the wheelchair?

You're thinking of Yuuki Yuuna wa Yuusha de Aru.

: Now that you mention it, that is right. Sorry, all the YuYuYus confused me.

: The MeMeMes?

No, that's a different series entirely. Plus that's more of an episode than anything else. But enough stalling-

: I don't believe that, but you're an expert on THAT topic.

-It's on to Botan's blog!

Hair: The first thing you'll notice about Botan is definitely her hair. It's a very colorful light blue, seeming to pop out compared to the more subtle colors of the rest of the cast. I do prefer darker colors, but Botan's hair color fits her well. As far as style, Botan usually has her hair up in a ponytail. It's the type that has a sort of upward bump in the back, rather than leaning straight own her back. It doesn't start out too long, only starting at her shoulders or so, but it seems to grow by the end of the series (or maybe it just looks fuller). The ponytail is held up by a red band, sometimes with a bow if she's feeling fancy. She also has long sides that reach her chest, though they don't cover her ears. Probably because of her ponytail, I guess. She also has pretty big curved bangs, as was sort of the style in the 90's. They also seem to get larger as the series goes on, but I'm not sure. As far as alternate styles, there's two main ones. For one, during a slumber party she puts her hair in buns and curlers. It looks more silly than anything else. Secondly, for a more "dressy" appearance she pushes her bangs to one side.
Grade: B

Eyes: This is one area that you can tel that Botan is from a 90's series. Her eyes are the wide style that was seen almost everywhere. They're very round, but also pretty expressive. Her corners also point upward, though she has a tarame. There's not much praise I can say for the design, but I do like purple eyes. Purple is my favorite eye color, and it goes well with her hair.
While Botan doesn't wear glasses she DOES at one point. She wears them in the Three Kings tournament arc as part of a disguise. At least in the anime, in the manga she didn't observe the fighting. Unfortunately this is before being a meganekko really caught on (there were a few examples, but no big ones) so sadly she had the coke-bottle variety I'm not fond of.
Grade: B-

Face: Again the 90's art style rears it's head, pun unintended. Now, Botan doesn't look too bad, but she is a sign of how styles change. I'm not too fond of the 90's shounen look as far as faces go, but her face isn't too terrible. It does have a fair-sized nose though, which is something I'm not fond of. That said Botan is a very expressive girl, and she has a few nice moments. I especially found her cat smile to be cute.
Grade: C+

Build: It's hard to tell how shapely Botan is sometimes, as her clothing usually covers her figure. If only we could see through clothes- THWACK!

*Topaz gets slapped in the face, dealing 5 damage and leaving a glowing mark.*

: Don't even think of using the Psychic Spyglass for such perverse reasons... Oh, wait. Sorry, I forgot who I was talking to.

No problem, I probably deserved it. But anyway, from what I can see Botan doesn't have a bad body. She has shapely hips and waist, though sadly Yusuke, the male lead, doesn't talk about her butt like he does Keiko's. She won't tell us her three sizes either, a shame! Her legs also aren't bad, at least from what I can tell (Kimonos tend to hide legs really well). Finally, for what ever reason when I put her name into Google one of the suggested searches for her is her feet. You see, she seems to have a barefoot scene during an episode which got really popular for some reason. I'm not sure myself, and it's not even that she got a close up or anything. Now, if she had done something like step on someone's face I could see the appeal, but as it is I'd rather look at the rest of her. Also, I haven't read the manga but it seems in that she has a separate body in the "human world" that she has to inhabit. This was taken out of the anime though.
Grade: B-

Breasts: Botan is somewhat busty, at least from what I can tell. It isn't TOO bad, especially considering how modern anime and even modern Jump is, but in series she's treated as having a fairly notable bust.
Grade: B-

Clothes: As said prior, Botan tends to wear a pink kimono most of the time. Around her waist is an obi which is a mix of red, white, and blue. She also wears a fancier kimono later on, one with designs, but that was just for a formal occasion. While I don't dislike kimonos I don't think they're suitable for a "common" outfit because they hide so much. Luckily Botan has a lot of alternative outfits. The first we see is one of a fortune teller, which is basically a hooded cloak and covered face (excluding her eyes). She also gets a hold of a female uniform from Yusuke's school so she can keep a closer eye on him. It's a basic medium blue sailor uniform with a yellow neck ribbon and a long skirt. She also wears a black jacket with a reddish tint and red pants during her most epic arc, looking really nice in it. As a whole she has a lot of nice jeans + top outfits, showing her sporty/tomboyish side. Some shirts include a green one with yellow sleeves hood with a fish motif on her chest, a pink business shirt with stripes and brown belt, or a sweater-like pink/purple shirt over a blue short sleeved one (I'm guessing). Later on her casual outfit has a brown vest over an orange long sleeved shirt with jeans, though she also has an outfit with a pink shirt and a different colored brown vest. She also wears overalls at one point, mixing it with a green shirt. Finally, during the dark tournament she wears a yellow long-sleeved shirt and brown pants with suspenders. Overall I don't mind a lot of her outfits, but the pants + long sleeved combination got a bit confusing. If only she wore short sleeves, or pantyhose to show off her legs, or even a NECKTIE as that would fit with a lot of her outfits!
Grade: B

: Grumble grumble! What's this about you and short sleeves?

I don't have anything against them, but it's a shame that your outfits are nice but you needed an extra push to get a higher grade.

: Bet you wouldn't mind if she had a cleavage window, like that one sweater meme.

That's true, but more for the variety than seeing her cleavage.

: Pervert... Wait, how did you remember so many outfits? The show was long and I wasn't expecting you to remember many.

I took notes and carefully reviewed the footage! It involved many painstaking weeks to review your series.

: Don't lie to the poor girl. Just admit that you found a CG set where she was wearing each outfit performing the same naughty acts on a faceless guy.


*Botan deathglares at Topaz, but eventually sighs and cools down.*

: I suppose you ARE of age and I can't say anything about fanart. Just get on with the blog...

That's kind of you, thanks.

Personality: Botan is the grim reaper in the YuYu Hakusho world. Or at least one of them. She was sent down to guide Yusuke in his task of regaining his body. Thanks to their great teamwork she starts aiding him more after he gets revived, being a guide and pushing him into doing his spirit cases. She's usually the one that briefs him on his cases, and is often the bridge between him and Koenma, his boss.
Personality-wise Botan is the exact opposite of what you'd expect from a grim reaper. This is even pointed out by Yusuke. She's a perky shinigami and is cheerful most of the time. She's hyper at times, but never to the point of annoyance, more of an excited tpe of hyper. She can be sarcastic and can occasionally break the fourth wall. She's helpful and well-meaning, but clumsy at times (again not of the annoying variet) and can be a bit of a trickstr or scaredy-cat. She eventually cares very deeply for Yusuke and his allies, cheering for them in every tournament even if it meant she'd be entering enemy territory. She's also the original healer girl in the series, though this gets taken over by Yukina. Still, Botan does help both to save Keiko early on an perform first aid in the Dark tournament. Overall, while not too notable of a girl I do like her.
I'll admit that I saw YuYu Hakusho dubbed. My reasoning is one of nostalgia, I first saw it way back on TV (though in the edited version). I bring this up because, to me, Botan has a British accent. At least when she's not slipping in and out of it. I'm sure that Sanae Miyuki is a good VA for her (I haven't heard enough, or really any of her), but to me Cynthia Cranz fits her a bit better. Nothing against her Japanese VA, though.
Grade: B+

Libido: Surprisingly enough Botan isn't treated as a love interest even though she's the lead female in the series (or at least shares that role with Keiko). In fact, very little of her libido is shown. She does smack Yusuke for trying to look at her with a special spyglass and dislikes Kuwabara's obsession with her, but misses it slightly when he moves on. In the non-canon Mu Mu Hakusho omakes she seems to be Yusuke's wife, but I shouldn't use that as evidence (it was just a strange dream).
Grade: C

Age: It's unknown how old or when Botan's birthdate is (even the manga seems to claim it's unknown). She acts similar to a student, but is alright with drinking alchohol at one point. Technically she's a Reikai so she ages slowly anyway, but it seems she had the job of the grim reaper ever since Yusuke was a child (so likely at least 10+ years).
Grade: A-

Total Grades: 67
Average score: 7.4
Final Grade: B-

: That seems like a good score. How did I do overall?

You've done the best this month!

: Considering this is only the second week it doesn't carry much weight.

: Don't worry, a B grade is about average. Then again it pales in comparison to mine. I got an 80. (Wait, why am I trying to compete with her. Am I threatened by her? But for what... Topaz... no, that can't be it)

*Riri shakes her head.*

Someting wrong?

*Riri blushes a bit.*

: N-no, nothing at all. Just finish up your dumb blog.

: But he hasn't done his good deed, and this week's almost up!

Well, I can't think of any good deeds at the moment. If you have any ideas-

: Well of course I do. You could help with old ladies, or aid children in crossing the road.

: But he already does that, even without being told.

: Hmmm, then we must have a more important task. *Claps her hands together* I know, you can send a recent rogue angel back to heaven!

Those darn rouge angles of satin!

: Didn't Zettai already make that joke this year?

Perhaps, but it seems that's it for this week everyone! Seems we'll be facing an opponent next time, be sure to watch! Er, read I guess.

Posted by emperortopaz | 12-11-14, 9:56 AM | 0 comments
December 4th, 2014
Anime Relations: Touhou Niji Sousaku Doujin Anime: Musou Kakyou
This is the Three-hundredth-fourteenth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*Ririchiyo and Rika are relaxing once again in Topaz's living room. Suddenly Kimiko bursts in, a phone on her shoulder.*


: If you're going to say you can save a ton of money...

: No. Plus I already used that joke. My Touhou contacts have finally found Topaz!


: Where is he?

: Uh huh. Yeah. Where is he? *she pauses for the other caller to finish.* He's in the Land of the Dead. *to caller* Wait, really?

*Riri looks concerned while Rika is annoyed.*

: Don't worry, Ririchiyo. Topaz is still alive. He just needs us to go rescue him first! *to caller* And thanks for the news, I'll be sure to keep in touch. *hangs up phone*

: This sounds complicated.

: It isn't. All it will take is a simple teleportation spell. Their Land of the Dead seems to have a lot of leeway.

: Must be a revolving door...

: Wait. Then, if it's so easy to get into why didn't you find him when you searched?

: I can't go to the Land of the Dead. They're making a special exception for the occasion.

: *irritated* And just what did you do to cause the Land of the Dead to kick you out?

: I might have... sort of... Stalked Komachi...

*Rika sighs and facepalms.*

: You'd understand if you saw her! Those great perfect orbs, as if sculped by the heavens themselves...

*Rika kicks Kimiko in the shin.*

: Enough of your dumb fantasies! Is there anywhere else you're banned from going? For future reference, of course.

: I can't go to the underground hot springs any more...

*She remembers the reasons why.*

: Hey, let me guess. It involves breasts in some way.

: Sort of, in a way.

: Pervert...

: That's fine, I just want to find Topaz. Er, because I want to scold him for his thoughtless behavior! (I can't tell them the real reason...)

: It might take a week to get there, or at least until the end of the blog.

: Well then, let's hope that he starts talking about a girl soon!


*In the Land of the Dead, Topaz approaches a desk with a chair rocking back and forth. The chair is facing away from him, and the girl in the chair begins to speak.*

???: So you're the still-living person who arrived in Komachi's boat...

That I am, they call me...

*The girl turns the chair in an epic fashion.*

: Do you think that I, the Yama of this realm, do not know all that pass through it? You're EmperorTopaz, blogger of girls.

Sounds like I'm popular down here. Must be Aya's articles.

: Do not take my power of the Yama lightly. In order for you to leave, I must first judge you.

What a coincidence, I could judge you right back.

: W-what? You do not have such powers!

Well, not to the amount that you have. My numbers are likely more arbritrary, but I'm sure you'd score well.

: Hmmm, although your blog is mostly cosmetic, I cannot say I am not curious to hear your thoughs. Please entertain me. This is a good deed you can do right now.

Well then, I hope it won't send me to hell but-

: I assure you, nothing you will say will change your stay or leave here. My answer will be unchanged.

What? You've already decided what to do with me?

: I have. After years of reviewing I've gotten quite fast at it. Do not think I am sloppy though, I have weighed the options clearly. I am just curious as to what one such as yourself thinks of me.

Well then, it seems that...

(Note: I may be using fanon/personal opinions about Touhou characters)

Also, I'd like to add that her name has many translations. These include "Shikieiki", though it should be two words, and "Sikieiki", as she was first translated as. Japanese can be complex sometimes. So which would you prefer?

: Call me by my title: Yamaxanadu.

That sounds like a long and complicated name. I'll just call you Shiki.

: *sigh* I suppose I did know that you were lazy... I have not qualms with it, though.

Well then, let's get on with the blog!

Hair: Shiki has greenish-blue hair, being more green than blue. It's a cool color, and one that's not too common. Speaking of not too common, she has about two different hair lengths in that the hair on the right side of her head goes past her shoulder while the left side is cut short. The left is nearly boyish as well, showing her ear, but not on the right. It's hard to tell exactly how long her hair is, but in the manga she seems to just be a long side-bang. Speaking of bangs Shiki's are pretty nice. I'm not too fond of the part in the middle though, she deserves a true hime cut rather than two parathesis.
Of course, we can't forget about one of Shiki's most notable features: her hat. Shiki's hat is one of the most ornate and fanciest hats in all of Gensokyo. It looks like a crown, having gold decorations and crown "tips" around a blue fabric. It also has a blue belt around a white cloth. Finally, she has a red-and-white ribbon, with the right being red on top and white on bottom while her left is the opposite. I really like her hat.
Grade: B+

Eyes: Unlike Komachi last week, Shiki has not been in any fighting games. As a result we're mainly stuck with the main game and some manga moments (having a Touhou character get forced to use their game is not a good thing). She doesn't have special eyes, and about the only big thing is that her eye color is a bluish and looks somewhat similar to her hair.
Grade: B-

Face: Like with eyes we don't have a great source for Shiki's face. At least she faces forward, which is sort of special compared to other characters. As with most Touhou characters she does have fairy small features, though it's possible that Shiki is somewhat pale (at least to me). One notable thing is that she'll keep a patient smile when scolding people, unlike some fan sources where she's quick to anger.
Grade: B-

Build: Like a lot of Touhou characters, Shiki doesn't have a set way for people to draw her. Shiki herself may be one of the biggest differences. You see, a lot of the time she's portrayed as a short girl, and that's the way I see her as well. However, this is a product of sprite limitations (her hat takes up some of the area) as she seems to be as tall as Komachi. Considering Komachi is quite tall I was surprised by this, even going against canon to think of Shiki as still being a short girl. Nothing wrong with lolis, after all. I like the extra contrast. Her height also appears a lot shorter in the Grimore of Marisa as well. Of course, either way we don't have much to go on. She does seem somewhat stocky, but I blame that on a possibly thick outfit. For some reason, Shiki DOES have one unique feature in fanart: she's a leg girl. I'm sure at least one of my friends will appreciate that...
Grade: C+

: Hmmm... Seems that writing this blog is difficult.

Well, I don't have much to go on. Perhaps if you show me your body...

: *Blushes and covers herself* W-WHAT? HOW DARE YOU SAY SUCH A THING!

I don't mean you have to get naked or anything. I meant you should get out from behind that desk. I can't see your lower half, and your height could be hidden by a high seat in that chair.

: High... chair... Are you calling me an INFANT?

No no no. Even if I think you're short you're not THAT bad. I just mean that it's hard to get your sitting height from this position. And if you're not coming out, I'll just look back there and-

*Shiki holds out her Rod of Remorse to prevent him from going further.*

: That's enough. No one is allowed at this seat other than ME! Blog or not!

Fine then. I guess it'll be a great mystery like with Patchouli's bust size.

: Oh, I know that.


: Not telling you though.


: Just get back to the blog.

Breasts: B-but I don't want to talk here next. I plead the fifth!

*Topaz get struck with the Rod of Remorse.*

: Stop that this instant! There's no reason for you to stop the blog here. Do your job!

*Topaz sighs* I suppose it would be unfair to skip this. Alright. Again, this area is a flexible. However, it's pretty given that she has a modest if not flat chest. This is how I see it, and it plays up the contrast between her and Komachi well. That said it's also gone so far as to make Shiki jealous of Komachi and wanting large breasts herself. However, this is more the fanon personality rather than the more accurate one. It's hard to tell officially, but I imagine she has a flat chest.
Grade: D

So how was that?

: A bit more depressing hearing about it from you, but I have no problems with my chest size. You may continue with the blog.

Clothes: Despite not having a lot of outfits I do like Shiki's. It's a military-like dark blue vest with red buttons and gold decor on the shoulders over a white shirt and a short black skirt. She also has ribbons on her forearms, which are red and white. Her alternate outfit makes her hat and dress be red while her white shirt is purple. She also always carries the Rod of Remorse with her as well, which she uses to punish people by writing their sins on them. She also has a cleansed crystal mirror, which reflects past deeds and is tiring to use, but it's not shown in her sprites. Hers takes the form of a hand mirror. Finally, as said before, Shiki is a leg girl. As a result of this, or maybe her short skirt, she became known to have zettai ryouki. No, not the other blogger, I mean she had thighhigh socks. It's strange though, considering that after that her OFFICIAL leg wear was shown and she seems to have extremely low socks as to mock that idea (though it does show off more of her legs, so who knows).
Grade: B+

Personality: Shiki is the Yama in charge of Gensokyo. For those who don't know, a Yama is the person who judges the deceased on where they go after death. As a result, she can see into a persons past deeds and scolds them if they misbehave. Her lectures are so well-known that Yukari, probably the strongest character in Gensokyo, is afraid of Shiki. This may just be because she's avoiding the lectures, but still. However, she's just trying to keep people from going to hell, rather than sending them for no reason like Fanon tends to think. If anything her motto of "Hell does not exist to punish sinners. Hell exists to ensure that no-one sins." is more supportive of the opposite. She also doesn't discriminate between youkai and humans, telling both Reimu and Yuuka (who is a youkai) to do their jobs better. Shiki does preach a lot to the characters, but to be fair they're not exactly the most righteous and she's doing it with patience. Most of the time, at least. She's a bit harsher with Komachi, but this is more a case of a boss getting mad at a lazy employee rather than Shiki being jealous of Komachi's chest (or anything else the fanon could come up with).
Shiki's ability is to establish something as good or bad (basicaly black and white). While this doesn't seem like a powerful ability, do realize that you can't overturn her opinion. Even a popular "OBJECTION" would have no effect against this judge! She's also the final boss as well, so you can imagine she's pretty powerful. In the Touhoumon games her "Judgement" is the only OHKO attack in the game and only she can learn it. She's also a Steel/Psychic type, though sadly she doesn't have a mega evolution (this was in Gen III). Overall I really like Shiki. She's one of my top Touhou characters still, and in general I like "lawful" girls like her. It would help if fanon stopped taking her lectures to the extreme. Though I do like her "Danzai Yamaxanadu" fan video, but that could be because her song (Fate of Sixty Years) is so good. Also, while I haven't heard anyone else think of it, her odd choice of Kanji for her name makes me think of chuunibyous for some reason.
Grade: A

Libido: Like with Komachi last week, there's no official sources for her libido. Probably the closest to her would be Komachi, hence one of the reasons I pair the two. To be fair Shiki is the tsundere one in their relationship, but I don't hold it against her.
Grade: C

Age: As a yama Shiki is immortal, and her actual age is unknown. Due to her size she's sometimes portrayed as a child, but I just assume she's sort (as said before). Komachi also says that she was originally a jizou statue who came to life after receiving enough faith.
Grade: B

Total Grades: 64
Average score: 7.1
Final Grade: B-

And that's your blog. What do you think about it?

: I did enjoy it, though I'm surprised that I scored the same as my lazy employee. How did that happen?

Well, let's just say that, while you're one of my favorites, there are certain areas where you're lacking. Komachi, on the other hand, has those but I'm not as big a fan of hers in other places.

: I see. Well, it's time to make my judgement... Topaz, you are-

*Topaz gulps, but Shiki's door swings open.*

???: Let Topaz go!

: Who keeps me from my business!

*Riri, Rika, and Kimiko all walk forward.*

: See, I told you we'd make it in time.

: That you did, though no thanks to Kimiko...

*Kimiko turns towards her, showing a red hand-print mark on her face.*

: Hey, it's not my fault Komachi was just sleeping there...

: You were staring at her! No wonder she slapped you!

: But....


*The three girls stare at Shiki, who clangs her Rod on the desk.*

: I'm not a fan of monkeying around in my room. If you have something to say, tell me then leave. I have a judgement to give.

: Alright then, please let us take Topaz back!

: Oh, you're vouching for him? Perhaps you'd like to remind me of his past deeds, and I'll see if they sway my opinion. After all, I do know you're a pervert...

: (P-pervert? What was Topaz doing with her) Uhm, He stopped Kanon, Tsukiko, and Hayate just this year. The latter was also a worldwide problem, from what I heard.

: Before that he defeated Maho who was attacking in a giant ship. He also defeated her minions of Iria and Chinatsu.

: Even before that he beat Dokuro-chan, Hinagiku, Quattro, and Tae as well as the space loli Riro who was planning on stealing all glasses for herself.

: Weren't all those battles BECAUSE he was doing his job?

Er... uhm...

: No matter, your words refused to change my opinion. Topaz, for entering the Realm of the Dead without dying, I sentence you to... Leave.

NOOO! Wait, what?

: You can just go. I knew about all these things before thanks to my mirror. Hearing your assistants talk so highly of you is commendable, though. I can't fault you for doing your job either.

: Topaz is.. free?

*She starts to tear up and hugs Topaz, quickly joined by the other two.*

: Wow, it's like she was able to read our minds!

*Kimiko coughs and blushes a bit.*

: Something wrong?

: I-I'm just so relieved that Empry is finally saved! Thank you, Yama!

: I approve of you upholding my verdict. BUT! I will have you return with the help of a shikikami. I can't have you walking back and forth through the threshold of death at will.

*Komachi peeks her head out of the doorway.*

: I don't know who you're getting to do it, but do remember that I'm not a valid target.

*Kimiko feels glares from Komachi.*

: That's fine, I luckily have a loaned one from another Yama. I hope you don't mind.

As long as I'll be alive, I don't mind!

: Good! Especially as I want to see at least one more good deed by the end of the year.

I'm sure that I'll find a way.

*A blue haired kimono girl flies through the door on an oar. She's wearing a pink kimono.

: You wanted me, Shiki Eiki?

: That I did, Botan. I want you to escort these four out of here. Maybe watch over them a bit, to make sure nothing funny happens.

: *salutes* On it!

*Botan escorts the four of them out. As they leave Komachi rushes in.*

: What is it? Looking for another excuse to get out of work?

: No, it's THIS!

*Komachi pulls an envelope out of her cleavage, which Shiki opens and reads. Her mouth opens in shock.*


: You know I don't like that Kimiko girl!

: But still, I can't believe that remnants of that book were somehow sensed in this area! They must have been brought here by some sort of spirit. Close down the doors, make sure it doesn't escape!

: ON IT!

*Topaz and others are outside of the castle as the portcullus shuts behind them.*

Well, that was a close one. Everyone out?

: Yeah.

: We're all here.

: I wonder what happened to make them close it down. That shouldn't happen.

I'm sure they just want their privacy...

*Suddenly a shooting pain is sensed in Topaz's body. He grasps his chest and falls to one knee.*


*She goes and checks.*

Y-yeah, I'm fine. I just probably have a bit of a headache from staying in there so long...

*He stands up and continues, unaware at the remnants stuck in his chest pulse slightly with demonic power...*
Posted by emperortopaz | 12-04-14, 10:37 AM | 0 comments
November 27th, 2014
Anime Relations: Touhou Niji Sousaku Doujin Anime: Musou Kakyou
This is the Three-hundredth-thirteenth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*We start this blog at Topaz's house. Rirchiyo is pacing while Rika is playing 3DS.*

: Hey, what's a good name for my starter?

: I don't know, Captain Punch? I can't think with Kimiko looking for Topaz like this.

: Uh-huh... And what should I call this HM Slave I just caught? It's a beaver, if you need to know.

: Anthony. Wait, how can you be playing video games while Topaz is out there?

: Well, it's not like I can do much here! All we can do is wait.

: True...

*Suddenly Kimiko Topaz comes through the door. She takes off her snow supplies and looks disappointed.*

: I don't like that look. Please tell me you found Topaz!

*Kimiko shakes her head.*

: Oh come on. It's obvious what's happened. She found him, and she's going to act like this to get our hopes up. Then Topaz is going to crash through the door and we'll praise him for finally getting here.

*Kimiko bows her head while Rika fakes laughter.*

: Wahahaha... You two have got us good! Really Topaz. You can come out now!

*Ririchiyo places her hand on Rika's shoulder.*

: I-I don't think she's joking. Are you...

: I'm afraid this is no joke. I've been EVERYWHERE and can't find Topaz anywhere! Either he's lost forever or he's purposely avoiding me! I even asked everyone I know to keep an eye out for him!

: I hope we get information soon...

Posted by emperortopaz | 11-27-14, 9:04 AM | 0 comments
November 20th, 2014
Anime Relations: Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha A's, Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha StrikerS, Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha: The Movie 2nd A's
Example #312: The Third Ace

This is the Three-hundredth-twelveth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

Welcome back everyone! I'm sure this has been an exciting month for everyone. We've been working hard to get to the center of this airship-type thing to find and rescue Hayate. Along the way the rest of the Wolkenritter were blogged on while they fight my assistants in various places. And now, as I'm sure you've been looking forward to...

???: Mwahahahaha....

Huh. Was that laughing you, Riri?

: Wasn't me.


: I wouldn't laugh in this situation.

Then who...

*Topaz realizes and turns up to Hayate.*

: That's right. It was me! Or rather the spirit of the book taking control of this cute girl! It's been so long since I've awoken I decided to play for a little bit.

Why are you attacking me?

: You think you're the only one I'm after? Nonsense! I'm focused on drawing all libido from this world!

Oh no!

: They're KyoAni!

Good joke! But this is a serious matter! Everyone knows that a person's libido is the source of power!

: You watch too much anime.

Not my fault that my life is anime!

: Shut up! I've had enough of this constant bickering! It's time to show you how powerful I TRULY am!

*Rings of light seem to be pumped out of Hayate's body, releasing across the globe.*

: WAHAHAHA! It looks like your "friends" will be having a harder time soon...

*Topaz's radio explodes.*

Oh no!

Hair: Hayate has short brown hair. It barely reaches her shoulders, and only one part (oddly on her side) goes past her chin. She does seem to grow it out in Force where it reaches her shoulder-blades or so, and in ViViD her hair reaches her shoulders all over. However, as far as the previous series (and thus most that I've seen her in) she has a boyish cut. I do like her hair color. It's a plain brown but a nice shade in my opinion. When transformed her hair does become lighter, becoming tannish in the movie but more white in the TV series. I don't mind the white, but the tan color is a bit bland. One can't forget her hair ornaments, though! As a child she has two varieties, a red X-shaped ribbon and double stripe of yellow. Both make her hair seem cuter, though in Vivid and Force she just has a yellow X (at least as far as pictures I've seen show).
Grade: B-

Eyes: Overall I like most of the eyes in the Nanoha series. Hayate's are no different, having big blue eyes and being really moe-based. However, as I look more and more close to all the girls, I have noticed that there's a large amount of characters with blue eyes in the series. Add that to the fact that Hayate has rounded eyes that are extremely close to Nanoha's, and while I don't dislike Hayate's eyes they're not too impressive either. They're still cute, though.
Grade: B

Face: Again the series is a great example of how faces should be. Well, as far as the anime, in the manga of the Nanoha series I still have a hard time telling the difference between characters. Hayate herself is very cute, moreso as a child than as an adult. Though speaking of her growing up, I'm not sure if she did it as graceful as Nanoha or Fate did. I'm not sure, it's like they were trying to keep some of her child-like innocence but weren't successful. Don't get me wrong, Hayate does have a great face, but maybe after investigating a lot of the characters in the series I've become somewhat more judging...
Her smile is still really cute, and since she's so positive she has it a lot.
Grade: B+

: Let's see if you can endure all these shadow creatures!

*Hayate conjures a beast-like creature with a horn. It charges at Topaz and friends, but is easily dispatched by Signum.*

: You continue the blog while we start clearing a path to Hayate!

Sounds like a good plan!

*Hayate continues to create creatures as Signum and Riri get closer.*

===Meanwhile, on the ground under the fortress.===

: Are you sure about this plan?

: Of course. A girl in glasses and a silly helmet suggested that we would be able to do this for excellent damage.

: And y-you're not afraid of falling off?

: Are you calling me a bad driver?

: Don't let my size fool you...

: S-size? (I hadn't noticed earlier but why are all these girls so HUGE! Even that tiny girl has a huge rack!)

: It will be dangerous. We've lost another pilot a month or so ago. I do wonder where she went.

: Luckily I think that most of the weaponry was taken out of commission by our initial attack as well as Topaz's invasion.

: And what trouble we have I can just fill up with my ability.

: Now everyone, we know what the plan is, correct?

: They fly us up there and we'll use a combination meal-I mean, attack, to destroy the fortress.

: EXACTLY! Though mentioning that did make me hungry...

: You can eat after this!

: Affirmative.

*Cryska and Inia board their mecha as does Mix. Emi climbs on top of Mix's ship while Saber mounts the other, and they fly upward.*

: Wait, I'm not sure this is a good ideeeeaaaaaaaaa.....

Build: Much like Nanoha and Fate, Hayate starts out as a loli and grows into an adult. As a result she can appeal to both types of people (and it's off-screen so it shouldn't bother those that don't like lolis growing). I'm a bit iffy on the loli side though. Not that I dislike lolis (I like the other two fine) but the fact that she's paralyzed and has to use a wheelchair is sort of off-putting to me. Fortunately she does get cured at the end. She gets a transformation scene similar to Fate and Nanoha, though sadly I can't find if she has a StrikerS one or not. I mention the two girls in particular as, like those two, she does show nipples in the A's movie. She also shows her butt on occasion but she's not Fate. That's probably her biggest problem. Most of her co-stars are sexier than she is or have a particular trait like the others. Fate has her butt, Vita has loli appeal while Shamal is more “adult”, and both Signum and Nanoha are bust girls. I mention two bust girls because of the trio of Fate/Nanoha/Hayate Nanoha is treated as the chest girl. You'd think that would mean that Hayate should show her waist more (so it would be Nanoha for bust, Hayate for waist, and Fate for hips). Sadly they waisted this potential.

: Topaz, don't make jokes that might be hard to understand....

I'm sure that's far from the most esoteric joke in this blog. Getting back to her body, while Hayate doesn't have an impressive waist she does have some nice legs (though most of the characters do). I'll also mention that, height-wise, as a child she's equal to both Nanoha and Fate (her standing height, at least) but seems shorter than them (as well as Subaru and Teana) making her the shortest main adult in the series. At least as far as I can tell. As far as my final opinion Hayate does have a great body and I prefer the StrikerS-on version, but I like the other girls more.
Grade: A-

Breasts: As with the other two lead girls Hayate grows into a healthy young lady. Her chest is perfectly fine, and in the prior series she has a great DFC. I will mention that, out of the three main girls Hayate seems like she has the smallest chest. That said she's still pretty stacked.
Grade: A

Clothes: Hayate has a wonderful amount of outfits. As a kid she usually wears casual or pajamas as she's a weak-bodied girl. I'm not sure if she wears a school uniform in-series, but if she does it seems to be a white sailor outfit with a long skirt, rather large collar, occasional blue stripes near the edges, and a red ribbon. Her magical girl outfit is a bit more impressive, looking like a white school jacket similar to Shamal or Nanoha, a tight black dress with a short skirt underneath, some decoration-like armor near the waist, and a cool beret-like white hat. No doubt she designed this herself as she designed the outfits for the Wolkenritter (as mentioned in their blogs). Occasionally she'll have black feathery wings behind her, and she's usually holding her staff “Schwertkreuz” or her book (the Tome of the Night Sky, which is her device and part of Reinforce).
Outside of A's she gets some great outfits. In StrikerS comes the amazing brown suits that I'm extremely fond of. Hayate even wears a necktie and white pantyhose! In Force she seems to change out for a blue suit which matches her eyes better but I like the brown one as it goes well with her hair. Not that I'm complaining, both suits are FANTASTIC! It's also suggested that Hayate enjoys cosplay and making outfits, though this isn't shown too much. Official art doesn't do too much to improve her, but it does give her a fair share of swimsuits (both bikinis as an adult and a sukumizu as a loli), a yukata, a few towel or hot spring images, and surprisingly a Halloween-ish outfit. She also has a tanuki motif, including a mask that she wears on a video phone call at one point in Vivid.
Grade: A

*Riri and Signum finally make it to Hayate.*

: W-what? My minions weren't effective against you? Let's see how you handle THIS!

*The magical machinery around Hayate becomes much larger, resembling a suit of armor with large shoulder pads.*

: That's a large machine...

: I'd go as far as to call it mammoth!

Don't you mean “Mammon”?

: Quiet, you! As for you, devilish machine, take THIS!

*Signum leaps above Hayate and dives down, thrusting the large machine. It goes berserk but frees the unconscious Hayate. Signum catches her mistress.*

: Now that we have Hayate we'd better leave! This place will collapse without her powering it!

: What kind of load bearing fortress IS this?

The kind that we'd better escape from!

*The three hurry from the machine, with Signum carrying Hayate, but thorned wires cover the door.*

Machine: Wahahaha, do you think I'd let you escape and take my power source that easily?

: We need a way out! Do something, Topaz!

All I can do is continue the blog and hope that will wake Hayate up...

: I hope it does...

*She glances at her mistress sleeping peacefully in her arms.*

Personality: Hayate is a very kind girl, but she's thrown into strange situation when she finds the Book of Darkness, a powerful dark artifact. She treats the protectors of it, the Wolkenritter, as her family and they care for her (otherwise she's an orphan). In order for the Book to be used the Wolkenritter are required to steal Linker Cores. They have to do this under Hayate's nose as she thinks that people don't deserve to be injured. As said before she's paralyzed and the Wolkenritter want to use the book to heal her (though to be fair it's the thing draining her power). She also becomes friends with Suzuka, one of Nanoha's friends so the two enemies have to be surprised by the other at points in the story.
Hayate herself is a great girl. She's mature, calling the Wolkenritter and even Reinforce her children, but she's not too serious either. She's often positive, even if she has to bury her true feelings. Hayate also loves books, though that's also what got her in trouble with the Book of Darkness. She also speaks with a Kansai accent, which is odd considering she's from the same town as Nanoha yet no one else has that accent. Not that I mind, especially since Kana Ueda is her voice actress and she's really great with that dialect.
As far as pure power goes, Hayate is probably the strongest character in the Nanoha series. Yes, that's even including Nanoha herself. While that seems impressive it's only considering pure magical potential. The problem Hayate has is that she's not completely able to control it. The bureau needed her to make her own device because her power kept breaking the ones they were making, and warnings are sent out when she heads to the battlefield (which she needs to get clearance for). Hayate specializes in wide-area bombardment spells, able to clear out entire armies at a time. As long as she has help aiming, of course. She does have to incant her spells as well, meaning she's not as great with one-on-one battles. She even says that Caro without her dragons could defeat her. Hayate is even nicknamed the “Living Lost Logia” due to her great power.
All in all Hayate is a pretty fantastic girl, but I do still prefer the other two “leads” over her.
Grade: B

Libido: Hayate doesn't have that much libido. Well, I do suppose that she enjoys fondling breasts for some reason, with permission, but as that's only in the sound stages I don't count it (it does explains a certain image). She's family and occasionally shipped with the Wolkenritter, mainly Vita or Signum. However, I think the main pairing people have is to pair her with both Nanoha and Fate as the three are the “main characters”. I also suppose there's the moment of the three of them sharing a bed in StrikerS. I'm not to big on threesome pairings like this, and the two are fine by themselves. Romantically, I mean, I'm fine with Fate having fun with Erio. Speaking of which I don't think that Hayate is paired with him, or many other guys, that often it seems (at least alone).
Grade: C+

Age: Much like Nanoha and Fate her score here depends on which series you're talking about. And, unlike the other girls this month, she actually changes in age. She's 9 in the majority of A's though in the epilogue she's 15. Hayate is 19 in the StrikerS anime though it seems the manga has her between 15 and 20. She's 23 in ViViD and 25 in Force. Overall she's a great age for me but like the other two averaging her age only comes to 18 (just counting StrikerS as 19) which is pretty nice.
Grade: A-

Total Grades: 80
Average score: 8.9
Final Grade: B+

: Hmmm, so you don't like Hayate because of her relationships with Nanoha and Fate then?

I hope to Arceus that's not the reasons I wasn't the reason I don't like Hayate as much as them!

: I'm sure that there's a better reason... Hmm?

*Hayate starts to squirm in her hands, but is still sleeping.*

Hey, Ririchiyo! Come here, it seems that Hayate is waking up. Maybe. ...Riri?

*Ririchiyo seems to be gone, but when Topaz turns to check he sees her being dragged towards the giant machine by shadowy wires.*

: HELP ME! *Voice changes.* I'll help myself to YOU instead, my delicious demon friend!

You'll never take Ririchiyo!

*Topaz marches over and starts to stomp on the wires. He manages to get Riri free, but gets captured instead.*

: Oh no! Topaz!

Don't worry about me, I'll try my best to control this ship to keep it from falling!

Deep Voice: Wahahaha! What lovely high libido this guy has!

*As the demonic version is distracted Topaz opens the door for the others. Ririchiyo hangs back.*

: Look at you, being a hero again...

Of course. As said before I'd do anything for beautiful girls! Especially ones as lovely as you.

*Ririchiyo flusters.*

Now go!

*Riri and Signum, with Hayate in hand, eventually run towards the exit and escape. As they float down they pass by some machines carrying two girls.*

: What are they... Wait! Don't destroy the ship! Topaz is still-

: Are you ready, Saber?

: Of course! Here we go...

*Saber and Emi leap at the flying fortress, their swords drawn.*

: NOOO!!!!

: Dual...

: Excalibur...

& : X-STRIKE!!!!

*The two sword users make a cross-shaped slash in the ship. The ship, and Topaz, take an overkill amount of damage. The ship slowly shatters into dust and Topaz dies while Riri feels a pit appear in her stomach, and the whole thing goes slow motion. She starts to sob.*

: Topaz.... WHYYYY!!!!

: It had to be done! Such a demonic force can't be allowed to exist!

: B-but he saved us all with his sacrifice. Why did you have to be such an i-idiot *sniff*.

*Emi and Saber fall over towards where they landed.*

: I'm very sorry about your loss. We had no idea there was anyone still inside.

: Please have our most serious apologies. *bows.

: That still doesn't help!

: How about I get you home. Then you can work with Kimiko and Rika for a solution...

*Signum takes the teary-eyed Ririchiyo back home. As they arrive Kimiko and Rika are waiting for them.*

: Hey... Isn't someone missing?

*Riri tells them the sad story. Kimiko and even Rika seem depressed as a result.*

: I-I can't believe that Topaz would sacrifice himself like that...

: It looks like I'm going to ask around the Touhou universe next week.

: Wait... Why's that?

: Oh, right. I forgot all about that. You haven't had this happen. You see, this isn't the first time Topaz has died. And, when he does, he gets reincarnated in the Touhou universe.

: But that makes no sense!

: I don't understand it either, but it's something that happens.

*The three cheer up, knowing that Topaz may still be out there.*

: I guess we'll have to wait until next week to find Topaz...

*The screen starts to fade in a circle around Kimiko as the three anticipate. Suddenly the circle gets bigger.*

: Hmmm... Seems like we're forgetting something...

Posted by emperortopaz | 11-20-14, 1:11 PM | 0 comments
Anime Relations: Clannad, Clannad: After Story, Amagami SS, Amagami SS OVA, Amagami SS: Imouto, Amagami SS+ Plus, Amagami SS+ Plus Specials, Amagami SS+ Plus Picture Drama
*Kimiko and Rika are sitting at a movie theater, sitting in seats.*

: Well, it's that time of the year again.

: Winter, accursed season!

: No, not that. Though winter does suck. I'm talking about guest blogs!

: Wait, even though Topaz put us through all that we STILL have to do the guest blogs? He should pay us more!

: He lets us mooch off him, we can go through this.

: Fine then! Let him have his character blogs!

: You're just jealous that “Oniisama” is letting other girls into his life.

*Kimiko smirks at Rika, but she gives her a hard slap and knocks her off her chair.*

: I'm alright! It'll just be a minute for me to get up!

: Well then, how about we look at the first guest blog of the year. It's ZettaiRyouiki talking about Tsukasa Ayatsuji!

*The movie starts to roll...*

*Kimiko finally sits back up as the video finishes.*

: Wow, I wonder what sort of things are kept in that diary. And how to get my hands on it...

: Sometimes I wonder what goes on in your head...

: Electrical sparks, same as everyone!

: THAT WAS HYPOTHETICAL! GEEZ! Anyway, isn't it about time for you to feature the second girl?

: That's right, we can't keep our audience waiting any longer. From ZettaiRyouiki here's Kotomi Ichinose!

*The projector starts to put up the next blog.*

: Is that all of them?

: That it is!

*Both girls give a sigh of relief.*

: Sadly we won't be able to share this with anyone.

: Well, who would watch this? Besides Oniisama, of course...

*Both girls sense a person in the theater behind them. They turn and notice a man in a suit with a camera for a head. He's doing a silly dance.*

: Oh dearest me! I've been caught! Better skedaddle!

*The movie thief runs off.*

: HEY! Come back here, you movie thief!
Posted by emperortopaz | 11-20-14, 1:04 PM | 0 comments
November 13th, 2014
Anime Relations: Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha A's, Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha StrikerS, Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha: The Movie 2nd A's
This is the Three-hundredth-eleventh week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

Welcome back everyone. As you can tell, we're about halfway through Hayate's giant airship fortress thing.

: We'd be further if you didn't try to convince us to steal from those multi-headed creatures.

Hey, we could always use more megaelixirs.

: What about the muscle freaks? I don't care how many Thunder Shields you have, you still won't be able to equip them.

Unfortunately that's true, though that's a completely different game. THESE guys you can steal Power Tabs from!

: Regardless we don't have anyone that can steal so the topic is pointless.

*Sigh* That's true. Anyway, we're getting further while the other characters are defending places of interest from other opponents. Kimiko is off facing Vita while Rika has to deal with Shamal. Speaking of them, how about we check up on them.

*Topaz messes with his radio and gets Kimiko first. She's staring upward dumbstruck.*

What's happening over there, Kimiko?

: Oh, Vita turned her hammer into a gigantic sphere and was about to squash us all when Tsukiko came. She became a giantess and is currently protecting us from the attack.

Ah, and you're looking up to make sure she doesn't drop it?


..I see. Wish I could be there...

*in the background* : HEY! No one stares at my imouto's hidney!

: You were doing it!

: I meant BUT ME! And that's a request to my darling imouto as well... *swoons*

: ...Pervert.

: Kuhahaha! As you can see our troops are doing nicely here. Plus I have more allies on the way!

Sounds great then! I'll swap over to Rika for now.

: Catch ya later then!

*Topaz goes over to Rika. Immediately he sees Yaya nearly defeated as well as Rydia barely able to continue casting spells.*

What's happening!

: Well, once we lost our melee support it's been difficult to endure each of the waves. Rydia's doing her best and it's not like I'm really that much of a combat person myself.

Hold on, I know exactly what to do!

: .... Really? That's it?

It's all I can do!

: *Sigh* I can just hope that there's going to be a random person showing up to help.

*Unknown to Rika Shamal slides up against her and takes the radio.*

: Hey! That's mine!

: Ha ha ha. It's like taking candy from a baby. Though I suppose considering your height that may be more true than I meant, hee hee.

: Shut your trap!

: Silly Rika, I have no crossdressers! Besides, I see you've shown your true powers and are finally doing your blog on ME today. However, I won't go down as easy as Vita may have. After all, now that I see you're not here I can destroy this house in a single attack...

Wait! Don't destroy the kitchen! And the rest of the house, but that's not as funny as the running gag!

: I care not for your gags! Surging Storm!!!

*Shamal leaps into the air above his house and sends down bolts of electricity. However, it seems to be absorbed...*

: Naked Collider!!

*...And sent back to Shamal. She avoids it, taking less that a few hairs from the powerful blast.*

See, I knew someone would come!

: And I'm not alone! Come out, Chris!

: Jeez, and I was waiting for a big entrance like you got.

*Chris leaps on top of Topaz's house with Himawari.*

: So you've got one or two strong units. Fufufu... (As long as I retain the TrueNameCaller I'll be unbeatable...).

*Shamal drops the walkie talkie back into Rika's hands to face these new foes.*

: Alright Topaz, it's up to you to do a good blog!

I can do A blog, but I'm not sure if it'll be great or not! However I can't be second guessing myself forever so here goes!

Hair: Shamal has medium-length hair, going about to her shoulders. That doesn't mean that it touches her shoulders though, it's more of a bob cut. It does spread out slightly at the bottom but isn't too wavy, and she has two air lifts like Vita did last week (only without as much “air” so they'd be more like horns). The hair on her sides isn't too long. As far as color, Shamal is a blond. Finally, as part of her outfit, she wears a green hat which makes me think she looks like a priest-type character from a video game. Overall her hair is somewhat cool, but nothing about it really stands out.
Grade: C+

Eyes: Shamal has the best eye color of the Wolkenritter. Her eyes are purple, which is probably my favorite color for eyes. This is balanced out by the fact that her eyes are the worst-shaped ones for my tastes. Unlike Signum and Vita (occasionally) Shamal always has a tarame. While it does work as it makes her look more motherly, I can't say that it looks as attractive to me as the other two. That said, there's nothing wrong with Shamal's eyes; the art style is still to my liking and I like the shininess that most Nanoha characters have.
Grade: B

Face: As said before, Shamal has a “motherly” look to her. I'm not sure why, but I do think that this is shown off in her face. Not that she looks old, of course, but rather that she looks more mature. Other than that, her face is fair though not outstanding. She does often wear earrings which could show a bit more maturity, but I'm not too big on them.
Grade: A-

*As Topaz was doing his blog Chris and Himawari were cornered by Shamal's shadow beasts.*

: Ara ara, any last requests?

: You don't have us yet! MEGADETH PARTY!

*Chris shoots out a multitude of missiles at the beasts, destroying many of them. Shamal continues to use her magic to summon more.*

: I have no problem with you wasting your ammunition on my minions. *smirks* (And as long as I have my TrueNameCaller it takes two of you anyway...)

???: They aren't alone!

*Suddenly a mech suit collides with the flying Shamal, blindsiding her. Shamal falls to the ground, but before hitting she creates an air cushion and survives unharmed.*

: I'll protect Topaz's house too! It just took me a bit longer than usual. You wouldn't understand how hard it was to get the machines for this.

*Shamal looks up at Linda.*

: It seems that I have a bit more trouble than I figured. However you wasted your surprise attack by not destroying me immediately!

*Shamal shoots a few unnamed magical “bullets” at Linda, but she shoots most of them out of the sky. Linda's machine is still hurt but operational.*

: Don't think that a few simple attacks will be able to keep me from defeating you!

*Linda shoots a machine gun at Shamal, but the bullets are absorbed.*

: W-what?

: That's impossible!

: Heh. How do you like that? With my new TrueNameCaller I can't lose!

: If we can't defeat you, we'll have to seal you away!

: Perhaps in a cave of some sort...

: The doors sound terrible! Besides, what's with us and thinking that the best solution is to seal things away?

: I'm lazy.

: I doubt that's the answer for the every trope, but for you I can believe that...

: Enough small talk, let's get down to business!

*Shamal is about to call another attack, but is interrupted by a lone girl singing...*

???: "Let's e-eat" and "I-It's delicious.."

: Hmmm?

???: T-those watchwords, of smiles...

: T..This energy. So ... positive...

???: There is happiness today because there is a great meal. I want to e-eat rice with an egg on top...

: I-it can't be!

: It IS!

*A brown haired girl is up on a rooftop, but surprisingly...*

: Y-yes! That's right.. Home c-cooking is very good!

: Phew, I was worried that it was a PreCure coming after me. Not that they'd stand a chance-

: E-even if there aren't side dishes, that's still OK...

: Do you really think that You can touch me by singing about rice?

: She can at least try!

: O-on the side of the s-smile, there is always warm rice!

: Your words carry no meaning! Get her!

*Shamal points at Hanayo and several dog-like creatures rush up to attack. Hanayo curls in a ball for protection.*

: KYAAAHH!! I knew I shouldn't have came!

: Don't worry, I got it! BILLION MAIDEN!

*Chris shoots down the creatures, but by doing so Shamal gets dangerously close to the house.*

: Watch out!

*More singing is heard.*

????: Searching for that Shapeless love.

: This again?

???: That certain kindness.

: Do you think you can fool me twice with the same trick?

*Four idols seem to form a square around Shamal*

: That never fading hope.

: Let them resonate, to the future!

*Energy swirls around Shamal as the idols close in.*

: W-what's happening?

: As long as you have a little bit of courage,

: Even if you haven’t' found it yet,

& : But I'm sure it's there!

: Such... Power...

: It can't be...

: & : Innocent!

& : Innocent!

: This is too ridiculous- I can't be defeated by THIS!

: That tiny bit of courage.

: The light of love.

: The sparkling stars-

: light up our lives.

All four: With our hearts together, let this melody resonate!

*The four aim their microphones at Shamal.*

All four: Idolmaster Innocent Purification!

*They strike Shamal down, binding her to the ground and pushing her back.*

: I was so clooossseeee!

: Well, that was a relief.

: W-we followed Chris here, but as we couldn't fight we stayed back...

*Hanayo climbs down.*

: It was all Takane's idea.

: You give me too much credit.

: I guess it's helpful that you watch children's shows.

: Well then, let me thank you. I didn't know bards could be that powerful. The only one I knew ran and hid.

: Hey.... You look familiar...

: Perhaps you're thinking of your Oniisama's blog. I am a major part of it in the latest arc.

: No, I'd think I'd recognize you...

:What if I did... THIS

: (please don't moon me please don't moon me).

(Please moon her please moon her).

: I mean, THIS!

: OH! THAT'S who you are! I think Topaz did a blog on you too.

: That he did.

: He told me not to read it. Was it perverse?

: Perhaps...

: Great like I needed more rivals for Oniisama's attention...

: What was that?


: I'm curious. How did you figure out which colors to be?

: Ara ara, a good question... Um, why was it again?

: You got chosen for blue because of your hair. I was chosen because I had a ponytail *shows it off*. Though I would have preferred not to sing as I'm just a manager now.

: I have short brown hair and had a similar name. A-at least that's what Takane said.

: Certainly. And of course I have the color hair closest to purple.

: Here I was thinking it was because you brought a tambourine...

: Yeah, whatever happened to it?

: Let's just say that while practicing it... "broke".

I'm jealous!

: *to Topaz.* Quiet, you! Shouldn't you be getting back to the blog now that things are taken care of here?

Oh yeah!

Build: Much like Signum Shamal has a curvy adult body. However, her outfit isn't nearly as complimentary and I don't think we see much of it. In general Shamal gets very little official art, and what little is from the front so she doesn't have a great butt image like Signum. The art style is a nice one though, and from what I can tell her legs are really awesome. She's slightly shorter than Signum, but less than a head. Unfortunately she doesn't have any exact measurements.
Grade: B+

Breasts: Judging by a certain image, Shamal is about as big as Signum. However, a majority of the time Signum is treated as the busty character in the series while Shamal isn't really talked about. I imagine this is because Signum isn't exactly modest, she's fully covered sure but Shamal tends to wear a lose outfit or a lab coat that makes her seem less busty than she actually is. Or maybe that image over-exaggerates her chest. Either way do know that she's a busty adult. Personally I don't mind Signum being busty, though...
Grade: A-

Clothes: As said before, Shamal wears a priest or cleric-type dress as her combat outfit. It consists of a white shirt with white tabard with green designs over it, a small light green jacket with huge shoulders and sleeves (at least in comparison to the jacket), and a dark green skirt that goes to her feet (or so) with white frills and a light green overskirt. And of course her nice hat, can't forget that. While it does cover her body a lot I can't complain as it fits her “support” role perfectly. In Strikers she tends to wear the usual brown suit most wear, including neck tie. She also wears a lab coat over it so people can tell she's a medic.
She also has other outfits. In A's she wears casual clothes when not in combat and she also wears a tight black dress under her outfits it seems (not as underwear). Most of her clothing the Wolkenritter wear is picked out by Hayate as well, just for background information. As a whole Shamal tends to wear greens and lighter colors. Her official art images include a bikini and apron (sadly not a back shot), bikinis in general, and a few images of her either nude (with censorship) or in just a towel. Seems the Nanoha girls like their hot springs...
Shamal's device is Klarwind. It's a German ring that she wears on her pointer finger. And ring finger. And the pointer and ring fingers of her other hand too! I don't understand how it works either, and there's not as much to talk about with her device as Vita's hammer or Signum's sword. I figured I'd give Klarwind a mention, though.
Grade: B+

: You'll never believe what just happened! A bunch of idols showed up and performed live for me! That's how important I am!

: AMAZING! Show me!

*Tomoko uploads her video to a website and provides a link.*

: What gives? The video seems to be taken down!

: It can't be- *checks, and indeed it's been taken down. She then screams to the heavens* COPYRIGHT LAWSSSS!!

: Truly they are the most fiendish of all corporations...

Personality: One of the biggest problems with Shamal, and one I've been skating around, is that she's the least popular of the Wolkenritter.

: What about-

Silly Riri, only GIRLS count. This is Nanoha! Anyway, as I was saying Shamal is the least popular GIRL of the Wolkenritter. Even in A's this is apparent as she doesn't have as much screentime as Signum or Vita. Or at least it seems as much. Shamal is likely the first female “causality” in Nanoha too. No, she wasn't injured or anything. What I mean is that Nanoha has a large cast so not all of the characters can stand out. Where as Vita and Signum went right into StrikerS as did Hayate, Shamal was only seen on occasions for being a medic. I imagine this being because she was designed to face Yuuno, the assist mage to Nanoha and later Fate. Both are blond support mages and I think they face off on more than one occasion. However, as they both are support mages there's nothing flashy about their battles, at least compared to some of the other fights in the series. Of course, like with their bodies Vita appeals to those that like hot-headed lolis while Signum is for those that like busty and stoic women. As a result Shamal really doesn't have the fanbase those two have, being more in the “average” area.
Which is a shame as there's nothing terrible about Shamal. She's the main housekeeper of the Yagami “family” and worries the most out of the Wolkenritter about Hayate's well being. She has both Vita and Signum not worry about betraying their mistress by finding Linker Cores as she'll take total blame for that. The pressure does get to her occasionally, and she gets an emotional crying scene. Other than the massive stress she places on herself she still acts polite and soft-spoken. She's a good example of a Japanese beauty and a motherly figure at that. She doesn't cook well, but at least it's edible (Hayate likes it).
As far as fighting goes, as said before Shamal is a support unit. She can use wind magic, but her most used ability is probably her healing. She is also skilled at making barriers and creating portals. This is why she's put against Yuuno so often (not that I mind, of course). Altogether Shamal isn't a terrible character but her low screentime, at least compared to the other girls, does hurt her for me.
Grade: B

Libido: Sadly Shamal really doesn't show any libido. She's treated as a motherly figure to Hayate and the other Wolkenritter. And, as much as this series would make sense and I'd personally enjoy it, Shamal and Yuuno aren't a couple after a few fights.
Grade: C

Age: Shamal, like the rest of the Wolkenritter, is technically ageless. However, what separates Shamal from the others is that she's the “official” oldest at 22. This fits her as she's definitely the most mature of the group. Technically, had I been giving age perfect scores years ago Signum would also have had it, but for now Shamal is the only one with that honor. Er, between the Wolkenritter, not altogether like many of my blogs mistake. Oh, and I do suppose that she's 32 in StrikerS and 38 in Force, but I don't mind too much.
I suppose she IS younger in “Iryou Shoujo Medical Shamal”, being ten and a loli, but that's not canon anyway. Plus she becomes her normal version as “Shamal” as her loli form is “Yuzuko Kagurai” .
Grade: A+

Total Grades: 77
Average score: 8.6
Final Grade: B+

: That's lower than what Signum got, but higher than Vita.

Indeed. As said you're between the two girls in most places. This includes my blog.

: I see then. But I must ask. How were you able to bind me like this?

: Well, that took something special...

: And I don't mean my amazing vampire ability.

: Where did you two come from?

: SHE brought us!

*Aoi points as a pink haired girl walks out.*

: P-Patchebel!

: No reason to call me that silly nickname. But I'm glad you remember me.

: Of course, but what are you doing here?

: I'm not going to be the one doing things...

*Kanon shifts to Apollo.*

: I AM!

: A goddess? No wonder those idols were able to bind me! They used YOUR enchantments!

: That they did, but I'm not done yet. Are you two ready?

: Of course!

: Why do WE have to help you with this! Not that I mind, we are saving Topaz. But STILL!

*Elsie and Haqua fly in holding a giant jar and cork, respectively. They manage to slip Shamal into the jar.*

: Usually this is for lost souls, but it was once used for a demon so you should be fine in it.

: I see... So you've trapped me.

*Shamal knocks on the glass of the jar.*

: Did you see that? We're done here. Can I finally take a break, Topaz?

Go ahead. It looks like we've finally arrived here too.

*The camera cuts to Topaz and others. They've finally reached the center of the ship and see Hayate trapped in a giant machine.*

: Help... Me...

Don't worry! I'm sure we'll help-next time!
Posted by emperortopaz | 11-13-14, 11:48 AM | 0 comments
November 6th, 2014
Anime Relations: Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha A's, Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha StrikerS, Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha: The Movie 2nd A's
This is the Three-hundredth-ninth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

Welcome back everyone. Last week we finished up with the underworld arc, defeating Fino in the process.

: Sort of.

: Right. After Rydia showed up and destroyed all of our clothes she gave up.

I suppose that is fair. But still, I wasn't expecting Rydia of all people to come and save us. Nor was I expecting this to all be a plot from Hayate, Signum's master, to get me out of the way so she can destroy the upper world. And she seems to have made it difficult for all of us this time around. She's attacking in separate parts, forcing us to split up the party. Rika and Kimiko luckily have walkie talkies so I'm able to communicate to them.

: Hopefully that's all the summary you have, as we've reached Hayate's base.

Wow, that seemed quick.

: A bunch of mecha-using girls were able to clear the way a while back. I'm guessing that many of the troops are with Shamal and Vita as well, so this place won't be as heavily guarded.


*Lights flash and laser domes come out of the ground. Ririchiyo shifts to her demon form and slices them alongside Signum.*

Luckily it's not 2300 AD!

: What?

: You're using obscure references that she doesn't get, Topaz. (of course I do get them, but... s-shut up!)

All I'm saying is that a ship this size certainly can't be a small OMEN...

: *Sighs.* Let's just get going...

Sounds like a good plan, but before we go too far I'd better check the other locations.

*Topaz tunes to Rika first.*

How's it going, Rika?

: We're still flying. It takes a while, it seems.

: You're the one who wanted to go by dragon.

: How could I NOT? Dragons are AWESOME!

I agree with that! But since you're not doing anything I'd better check on Kimiko. Talk to you later.

*Topaz messes with the Walkie Talkie again, eventually getting static.*

: What's wrong?

I think that they're still in transit.

: But I thought that teleportation was instant.

Magic is strange, I guess. But I think we'll be seeing her shortly...

==Meanwhile, in a certain mansion==

*Hayate is thrown back by a brutal goblin punch.*

: Urrgh... *stands, but looks bloody.*

: H-Hayate.. You barely look like you can stand!

: He's just trying to psyche out the opponent! You can do it, Hayate!

: Thanks for the support, ojousama. But I don't think I can do this alone...

???: Luckily you don't!

*Hinagiku and Isumi show up behind him. Isumi has a few talimans at the ready while Hina has her sword Shirosakura out.*

: I'm here too- Whoops!

*Saki trips running into battle. She stands up back by Maria, who helps her up, and Nagi.*

: Leave this to us!

: We're professionals!

: HA! Professional WHAT?

: Professional professionals!

*Isumi throws her talismans at the goblin-like creatures, destroying them. However, a few bats swoop in and attack her.*

: Don't worry, I got this!

*Hinagiku leaps on a table and chops them in half (though the magic just turns them to ash).*

: Good job saving her, Hina. You're the man!

: (T-the man?)

: You were great too, Isumi.

: But to be expected...

*A bat flies towards Hina. However, this one lightly taps her on the shoulder. She overreacts and grabs her ankle. Isumi throws a talisman at it to make it disappear.*

: Oh no! My girly ankle of girly womanhood!

: Are you alright?

: Has he always been this dense?

: I'm afraid he has... *shakes head*

: Enough of this toying around, get them Boss Goblin!

Boss Goblin: *Grunts*

: Both Hinagiku and I are too injured to continue.. What are we-Isumi!

: I'm all out of talismans. I was only carrying my travel-size packet and wasn't planning on having to battle so many creatures at once.

: (Of all the times!).

*The larger-than-human sized goblin charges at the group. However, a voice is heard from above.*


*Kimiko and Fino fall out of the sky and onto the large goblin. Fino falls on his head while Kimiko falls on his back, pinning it under their butts. It moans and slowly does a thumbs up before disappearing.*

: Kuhahaha, we have slain the beast! Though I wonder what did it in.

: I imagine it was... ASSphyxiation! I guess he went out the way he enjoyed.

: W-who are YOU and why are you at my mansion?

: Do you not recognize me? I'm the demon lord's daughter!

: Don't you think it's about time for you to give up on those chuunibyou thoughts?

: No, really, I am!

: Sure, sure...

: I'd imagine you'd believe her. It's not like shadowy monsters attack here everyday so strange things might happen...

: W-wait. I recognize you. You're one of Topaz's assistants!

: So that's why this is happening! It's all Ojou's fault! or are you going by "wig" again?

: I didn't do anything, it's all her!

*Hinagiku points to Vita.*

: That's right!

: I thought you were fighting Zettai, or at least with him, most recently!

: Finales are a funny thing.

*Kimiko's walkie talkie starts to make noise.*

Kimiko! Are you there?

: Yeah, we got here safely.

: I landed on a guy's head and squashed him!

Some of that I'm jealous of. But perversion aside who is the girl there?

: It's Vita!

How horrible, the 3DS is MUCH better!

: Certainly, it has Sm4sh and Pokémon for one!

: This isn't a time to be discussing my name! I'm going to destroy you all and send your cores to Hayate!

Not if I can do this first!

: Is that all?

It's all I can do from here. Besides, I have a feeling there's more people there than you give credit for...

: At least that's a cute image.. I MEAN, how dare you start your blog without asking for permission first!

You're attacking innocents, I can bend the rules a bit.

: Looks like your plan has been foiled, for now at least!

Hair: Vita has somewhat short hair, or at least looks as if she does. Her hair is usually done up in twin pigtails, braided to look really cute. The braids themselves tend to stick out slightly, being straight and not curling like Ritsuko's. They go about to her mid-torso or so. They're really cute, giving her a lot of Gothic Lolita appeal. Speaking of which, she has quite a few nice hats, one in particular being a red beret. She looks really adorable in them and she's also extremely defensive of them as well. In front she has Key-Horns or hair intakes or whatever they're called (her upper bangs seem to have a bit of a lift to them). She also has an ahoge. While I'm not sure if she has it down in the series proper there are a few nice official images of her with her hair down. It looks wavy and does go about to her hips or so. Overall Vita's hair is pretty awesome and I could see her getting higher if it wasn't an orange-red-ish color. That said, while I'm not fond of the color it does match Vita's color scheme well. Her hair gets lighter, slightly, when in a Unison with Reinforce II.
Grade: B

Eyes: Sadly despite being a braided magical girl Vita does not wear glasses. I don't usually mention it as a lot of girls don't, but it's unfortunate as she'd probably look good with them. Back to her actual eyes, Vita does have a strong tsurime though it becomes more relaxed the further into the series we get (must be a villain thing, I guess). She still retains some slope though, don't worry. The eyes in Nanoha are also great for my tastes, being nicely sized and full of life and color. Vita does have blue eyes which doesn't bother me too much but do take notice that there are a lot of blue eyed characters in the series.
Grade: B

Face: Nanoha the series also has really cute, if fairly uniform, faces. Really, it's hard to tell people apart in the manga as a result. That said, Vita does have a cute face. She's the type to make all sort of emotions rather than the more stoic Signum. She has a pretty awesome "determined" face as well as a few sly smiles. She also has small features which is standard but still nice.
Grade: B

: Enough of this small fry. Go forth, Giga Robo!

*A three meter-tall machine with large arms shambles towards them.*

: HAH! Let's see you destroy THIS!

*As the mecha looms over them, a quick shadow flies up towards it. It jumps back and forth across the giant robot and within seconds the creature is destroyed. The attacking girl lands reveals herself.*

: Once again I've cut another useless thing...

: Look Hayate! It's Mikasa from that show with the giants!

: I told you not to watch that, it's far too violent for girls your age!

: A brave attempt. It seems I was wrong to underestimate you. Fine then, take THIS!

*Vita summons a multitude of bats from behind her.*

: Where did she get all these new moves?

: Hayate, the one that's my master, blessed me with many abilities now that I'm fighting for her!

*The bats dive bomb at the team, but one by one they get shot out of the sky.*

: WHAT?!

*Everyone turns to look where the shots were fired. There, standing on the table, is a green-haired mostly-girl figure.*

: Oh? Little ol' me? Certainly. That should keep you from underestimating us! And I'm not the only guy like me either! ... You can come out now.

???: I don't want to!

*A voice is heard under the table and table cloth. It is soon joined by a second one.*

???2: But you have to!

???: It's embarrassing! I can't be s-seen like this!

???2: Don't worry, no one will know it's you.


*While they talk Saki goes over to investigate. However, she trips and knocks the table away. Mariandale jumps away in time, but under the table seems to be a magical boy with a cat. The boy gets very embarrassed.

: Noooo! Stop staring!

: Enough of this! *stomps foot* I'll just take care of you MYSELF! Like I should have in the first place!

*Vita dives at Kanata, who barely blocks with his staff in time. It's snapped in two and he's flung backwards.*

: THERE! That takes care of that! Now I'll just get the rest of you and...

*Vita turns to Hayate and others, but they've gotten three new defenders.*

: I'm lucky that my family was invited to such a party as this. I had a bad feeling and decided to come.

: Ikaruga said that there would be cake here. Yay cake!

: ... I go where Hibari goes...

: Who cares! It's just more people I have to defeat!

*She charges at them, but Ikaruga blocks it with her sword.*

: Silly Vita, I have the weapon advantage! And now that you're defenseless...

*Yagyuu fires at Vita from her umbrella though she blocks it with a magic forcefield. Hibari does a punch-punch-butt attack, hitting Vita's feet in the last hit.*

: She kicked my butt, Yagyuu...

: That's just because you hit my feet with your gigantic butt!

: How dare you do that to Hibari!

: You're not listening! Urgh! This is so frustrating! I once beat NANOHA, why do I have such trouble against nobodies like you?!

: I blame Topaz's blog powers weakening you.

: Why didn't anyone tell me that! But I have a plan- *flies upward.* There, now you're unable to reach me!

: Quick, Topaz, do something!

I'll continue my blog for now, you guys brainstorm!

: Don't worry, I'll attack her with my Power Glove!

: I thought that it was a "Power Hand".

: But I like this name better, it's so BAD!

*Fino uses her giant hand to hold back Vita while Topaz continues his blog on her.*

Build: Vita is first and foremost a lolihag. That is, as part of the Wolkenritter, she never ages. As a result she'll be a short loli character for all time. Unfortunately I can't find any measurements on her, but she is about the size of a preteen (she seems about Nanoha's height in A's and is about to Shamal or Signum's hips). She does have alright legs, but as she's still a small girl they're not quite developed and the same for her hips or waist (and bust is out of the question as well, but that's later). She's not a terrible loli, she just doesn't measure up to some beauties I've seen. May be that her clothes don't show her off, for example. I'm not sure if they show her transformation in the second movie, but looking at her Strikers transformation we do see a bit of her bare butt right before her skirt appears.
Grade: C

Breasts: Unlike every other character introduced before Strikers Vita is the only one to remain with a flat chest onward. Okay, so Arf has a more "modest" version of herself, but Vita is the true lolihag of the Nanoha series. As she is, she's fine and delicious. I'm just not attracted to flat chests like say, Zettai, is. Not that I'd want Vita to grow, of course. I have Signum and the other girls for that, no reason to take Vita's best appeal away from her.
Grade: D

Clothes: Vita's main outfit is her combat uniform. It consists of a great red-and-black gothic loli outfit with poofy shoulders, frills, a few bows, black gloves, and a long skirt. I'm not sure if she wears her thighhighs or not in this outfit (I can't find an image of her from below the hips) but they're cool black-and-white striped ones. She also carries her hammer device Graf Eisen which speaks German which she uses both in melee and to fire sphere-like orbs at her opponents (by striking them). It also matches her hat which I've mentioned before goes well with the outfit. It also has a bunny face, which is somewhat her motif in a way. Sadly she doesn't show a lot of skin so it's somewhat hard to determine her body.
Vita has a few other outfits. One is a cool t-shirt with skull on it, short skirt, and her thighhighs as said before. This is her basic "casual" outfit in A's and it's possible that Hayate made it for her. Another casual outfit is her pajamas, which looks basically like a long shirt with striped panties. In Strikers she seems to wear her military uniform more often. Not that I mind. It's a white jacket with shirt underneath, blue necktie, short blue skirt, and boots. Sadly she doesn't have awesome legwear like Fate's pantyhose or Nanoha's thighhighs. Also, in A's she wears a black dress though it seems looser than the two other girls. Official art adds quite a bit more outfits. These include naked towel, a sexy kimono, various one piece swimsuits (though sadly not a school swimsuit), a gym uniform with red bloomers, miko outfit, and probably some others I'm unable to find.
Grade: B

*Vita finally breaks free of the Power Glove's effect.*

: Nya ha ha! I knew you couldn't control that thing forever!

: It's true, I poured too much magic into that... *pant pant.*

: What are we going to do?

*Mariandale continues firing, but to no avail. He turns to Kanata.*

: Ya gotta think of something! You're the only one here with magical powers.

: B-but without my staff I'm nearly powerless!

: Then use something else!

: But where...

*Kanata looks around and finds a familar person.*

: Would you guys be quiet? I can hear this wild party all the way from the inn!

: Perfect!

*Kanata fondles Naru's chest.*

: W-WHAT? I hope you have a good reason for that!

: I wanted to pick-

: Never mind, I don't care... PER-


*As Naru is about to attack Kanata he's able to cast a light freeze spell on her, stopping her in place.*

: I'm not sure what your plan is.


*Kanata picks up the stopped Naru and tosses her at Vita. Just when she's about to hit the magical loli Naru unfreezes.*


*Naru punches Vita with the fury of a tsundere hit. She seems effected.*

: Not tsunderes! My one weakness!

: What kind of weakness is that?

: I wear glasses...

: BEAUTIFUL *is totally distracted.*

: That seems to have worked. Quick, someone else volunteer!

: I know who wants to be tossed next.

*Sena pushes Yozora forward. However, when Kanata goes to reach for her Yozora is further down and he grabs Sena's hand instead.*

: Wait, not me!!!

: You reap what you sow, you Enrac cow!

*Kanata still throws Sena at Vita, but misses.*

: KYAAA!!!!

*She lands safely.*

: But why DID we have that truck of manure sitting there?

: Must be a garden supply.

: Curses, she was too lopsided and couldn't go straight!

: That explains why she keeps going after Kobato...

: It must be her large breasts. Not to be mean, but I think flat girls would have less wind resistance...

: Don't look at me!

: Well then, you'll have to do!

*Kanata grabs one of the caterers.*

: EEEK! A MAN! Somewhat, but still! *starts to punch.*


*Kanata tosses Inami as well, getting Vita with the idiotic punch from Inami instead. The punch penetrates her shields, knocking off her hat. It floats downward. Inami lands with Naru and Sena in the soft manure safely yet stinky.*

: MY HAT! That's it, today is a day that will live on INFAMY for you!

*Vita swings her hammer at Kanata, flinging him across the room. He even strikes Mariandale on the way. Both guys are knocked out of commission.*

: That's what you deserve, you traps! Now, to deal with the rest of you!


: Alisa?

: Milady?

: I'm standing right here, Hayate...

: Then who is it?

*Three lolis and one busty elf emerge from a portal.*

: I TOLD you we'd be late! It's all your fault for wanting to bring more people with you.

: B-but I figured that, since you're not the greatest mage and I don't have many spells we could use all the help we can get...

: Harumph. You should be lucky to be in the presence of a Flame Haze such as myself.

: At least I can understand her. She's like Kirche and has fire spells. What about HER? *points to Taiga*

: What? You talking 'bout ME? I've been in plenty of fights!

: I just figured that we could use all the help we can get.

: Do you not believe in me?

: No, but...

: Look at all the cool cosplayers Hayate! I want magic too!

: I don't think that's something you can just pay for... Also all these voices are confusing my ears.

: Suddenly I have an idea! Listen to this Nagi, and you four come here too.

: Sure! *walks over, bouncing the whole way.*

: Wait, I lost it...

: Probably something involving Vita's weaknesses or something.

: Right!

*Kimiko whispers her plan.*

: Hey, what are you talking about over there! No matter, I'll just squash all of you flat at once!

: I think that for some of these girls, myself included, that wouldn't be a problem.

: You may want to cease such jokes, Kimiko.

: True... But for now, use that attack!

*Nagi pulls out a full bag of money, Shana and Taiga draw their swords, and Louise arms herself with her wand. They get in a square-like formation around her.*

: Fool, I'll just shield and-


*Tifania shoots a beam that stops Vita's shield from coming up.*


*The four tsunderes charge in.*

: Four...

: Riesundere...

: Cross...


*The four girls run in perfect formation, striking Vita and sending her upward with massive damage and even an explosion. She lands and breaks some tables while sending up dust.*

: Looks like we have this under control, you'd better continue your blog!


Personality: Vita is a pretty amazing character. She's a boisterous short girl, which is always a humorous pairing. Then again, considering she's fought with Nanoha and came out on top her words aren't meaningless. She's confident and powerful, but relies on brute force and emotion more than the other Wolkenritter. In some ways she's a bit of a jerk, but always comes through for her friends and has others best interests in heart. She's somewhat slow and not as dodgy, but makes up with it with sheer endurance. She also can make her hammer super-huge which is amazing, though seeing her in combat is pretty amazing as well. Speaking of her hammer, I wonder if that as well as her shortness is supposed to portray her as a "dwarven" character, but that's just speculation. She's a sort of honor blade, but more like an "honor hammer", as she's fiercely loyal to her master.
As far as personality, you could call Vita a limited tsundere. She is shyer around Hayate and others while "tsun" with her enemies and Nanoha. Even after becoming friends I don't think they have a great relationship (it happens). However, she's more of a hot-head and easy to anger. Speaking of Nanoha, in Strikers her and Vita team up to teach the Stars Squad though she still works with the other Wolkenritter. She's also a pretty large ham, shouting attacks and being really entertaining in general. She also mistakes names at times. Sadly her childish side keeps her from getting too much higher on my scale, though.
Grade: B

Libido: Vita really doesn't show too much libido. She's shipped with Nanoha because they're rivals, the rest of the Wolkenritter sans Zafira I imagine, and Hayate. There's a cute image of her blushing with Nanoha which helps but I don't think she's the one for Nanoha. I'd probably put her with Hayate as the two are cute together. Oh, and like many Strikers girls she gets paired up with Erio sometimes. It helps that he's the lone male (or at least the main important one) but I haven't seen much with those two personally.
Grade: C

Age: Technically Vita doesn't age and is an eternal loli. She's said to be eight as far as A's is concerned and ages up to 24 in Force. That said, it really doesn't matter as she'll always look the same and that's just for forms. She's eighteen in Strikers, which is a nice age for me, but I have to judge based on her looks as well. Not that there's anything wrong with lolihags, but they don't score as well as they could. She isn't immortal either (at least as far as combat goes).
Grade: B-

Total Grades: 58
Average score: 6.6
Final Grade: B-

And with that it sounds like Vita is done for.


*Vita stands up from her crash, her clothing ripped in places and looking obviously injured. She quickly flies upward.*

: Time to use the ultimate attack, the one given to me by Hayate's new powers... RIESIGENKOMET HAMMER!

*Vita's hammer becomes huge and spherical, nearly covering the entire mansion with the ball-like tip. The front also has a picture of Vita's face on it. The girls that were away cleaning up the army return.*

: That's one huge moon...

: Hayate! Do something!

: I'd love to, but what can we do against an attack that large?

: Perhaps I can be of some assistance. *munch munch*

: Let me guess, you came here to eat the snacks.

*Tsukiko nods.*

: Don't worry, she's learned her lesson about attacking Topaz. Haven't you?

*Tsukiko nods.*

: So what's a non-magic user like yourself going to do?

: Holy powers of the cat god, bestow upon me THAT power again!

*Tsukiko glows before growing back into her giantess state.*

: GIANT IMOUTO BUTT! *nosebleeds.*

: Riri told me that was your reaction last time as well... I don't blame you, it looks like there's ANOTHER large moon out!

: Stop staring...

: *sigh* Why are you two such perverts...

: You might not want to snap at them for that, Yagyuu.

: So what? You've become huge but I won't be stopped!

*Vita swings the hammer down, but Tsukiko is able to keep it from hitting.*

: I've got it. For now...
Posted by emperortopaz | 11-06-14, 11:52 AM | 0 comments
October 30th, 2014
Anime Relations: Yuusha ni Narenakatta Ore wa Shibushibu Shuushoku wo Ketsui Shimashita., Yuusha ni Narenakatta Ore wa Shibushibu Shuushoku wo Ketsui Shimashita. OVA
This is the Three-hundredth-ninth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

: Welcome back everyone. Now, you might be wondering why this beautiful girl is bound up in front of you. Or you might be wondering why I'm doing this introduction instead of Topaz. Unfortunately, it seems that he got thrown out of the window last time. I'm sure he's fine, but until then I'll have to speak on behalf of him. As for why we're bound up, it's all Fino's fault.

: Kuhahaha! That's right! I got my revenge on that fool who defeated the demon lord!

: But Topaz isn't even the one who did that! That was Emi, I think!

: No matter. Topaz still had a hand in fighting my father!

: But what about us? Why are you still binding US?

: Agreed! This is too tight on my stomach and-

: Rika wants to keep all her gas for her "Oniisama"...

: If I wasn't bound up I'd smack you for that! Don't mock my problems from earlier.

: Kuhahaha! It is true that now that Topaz is out of my hair I have no reason to keep you. Do you think that you can do that?

*Fino turns to the shadowy figure and nods. The figure starts to move forward, but Riri gets an idea.*

: WAIT! While we're your captives, don't you want to gloat about your plan?

: OF COURSE! How could I, a noble demon, NOT want to gloat? You see, this girl came to me and showed me videos of Topaz defeating the demon lord. Said that it was all his fault and stuff.

???: Secretly I only wanted to have you keep Topaz away for a while while my mistress prepares...

*all characters*: HUH?

: Y-you're not going to double cross me now? That power hand was such a cool item!

???: Keep it for all I care, but you won't be using it MUCH!

*The shadowy figure pushes Fino against the bound three.*

???: Easily manipulated...

: N-no! You can't defeat me now! What about our deal?

: At least reveal yourself!

: I agree! And we mean take your clothes off too!

: Ignore Kimiko, she's odd sometimes...

???: Very well, though you should recognize me.

*The tall, ponytail girl reveals herself. Sadly not to Kimiko's liking.*

Posted by emperortopaz | 10-30-14, 11:05 AM | 0 comments
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