emperortopaz's Blog

April 28th, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-eighty-seventh week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*Topaz and Ririchiyo walk through the arena backstage area.*

Wow, I'm surprised that we didn't get stopped on the way here.

: Certainly, but I imagine that it's because you're lazy.

Perhaps. And for those of you just tuning in we're at the Grand Arena. It's a new part of the Colosseum that Aldra controls.

: New part nothing. I'm pretty sure this “Grand Arena” is just a fancier name for the old section.

So that's why it looks familiar. But to finish we're here to face Melona as she's finally challenged us to a one-on-one battle.

: She challenged YOU. Otherwise a two-on-one battle would seem unfair.

Good point. But at least you're here for moral support.

*Topaz rubs Ririchiyo's head.*

: Hey, stop that! I didn't say that you could touch me!

Fine fine.

*The two continue out to the center. A cheering crowd greets them, and Melona is standing in the middle of the arena. She smirks once she sees Topaz coming out.*

: I'm glad that you weren't so intimidated by my challenge that you ran away. Having you here will at least keep me entertained for a while.

But why are you bothering me?

: That's none of your concern.

I think it is. You DID attack me a lot.

: I just needed someone to play with. And young boys like you and Zettai are so much fun to toy with.

: Careful Topaz! She might be plotting a devious trick!

: Awww, you give me too much credit. But even without a silly trick I can still defeat an idiot like you! In fact, since I'm curious how about you do a blog on me first? Might as well do a great beauty such as myself before you end.

*Meanwhile, up in the VIP room Aldra clenches her fist and slams it against the arm of her throne.*

: That Melona is stalling again!

: She's never been someone who enjoyed listening to rules.

: I hope that she shall not regret asking Topaz to do such a thing...

: I doubt it. Topaz is honorable and wouldn't attack her without warning. However, it does give him time to prepare...

*Aldra hits a few buttons and a microphone emerges from her throne.*

: MELONA! What do you think you're doing? Destroy Topaz this instant!

: Nag nag nag. You never let me have any fun. Even if you are Aldra-sama doesn't mean I have to obey EVERYTHING you say.

: You dare betray me?

: Betray nothing. I respect you giving me a chance, so allow me to take my time.

: *Angry* FINE! But you shall not get any help from me!

: I wouldn't want it any other way!

*Melona turns to Topaz, who has entered the arena. Between them a cloud of smoke appears and a fox demon girl announcer appears.*

: Is everyone ready to BATTLE?!

Oh, haven't I seen you before?

: That's right! I work for Aldra, but only in purposes pertaining to the Colosseum. Hey, haven't I seen you here?

Sure! A few times, no less!

: Neat. *To audience.* Well then, it seems that Topaz wants to do his blog before facing Melona. Hopefully those bloodthirsty members in the audience can handle the wait! But I imagine that the Grand Arena, one of the three new arenas, will be the place for a major battle today!


: Yes, didn't you know? There's the Grand Arena, the Terrain Arena, and the Forge Arena. But enough exposition. I'm sure everyone knows what we're really here for...

Today's girl is:

Queen's Blade

*The audience cheers.*

Hey! That's my job!

: Let other people announce the girls once in a while. Sheesh...

Fine, saves me work. But as the announcer says let's begin...

Hair: Melona has fairly neat hair. Sure it's pink, but it actually looks really good and fits with her character as well as outfit a lot. Plus I like how her bunny ear-like protrusions look when pink. I'm not a big fan of the Lime green variety in the game books, but luckily she doesn't use that in the actual series. Style-wise Melona is pretty nice too, she has huge wavy hair that looks really pretty. It goes until right above her hips, meaning it's a perfect length. She even has a really nice hime cut too! As mentioned before she has rabbit-like ears that look really soft and squishy, and thanks to her shapeshifting abilities she has a lot of varieties with her disguises. Even including wings in one image. About the only problem is with her sides, but it is a major one. While the sides themselves aren't bad, reaching her chest and making her hime cut look better, I really dislike the fact that her hair ends in hands that are used to support her chest. Barely support at that, and while more of a clothing issue (I'll probably talk about it there too) it's one of the things I dislike about Melona.
Grade: B+

Eyes: Her eyes aren't too great either. While she can change the shape of her eyes, she's unable to change the color. This is a bad thing as Melona has blue eyes like an unfair number of characters in her cast. She also usually has a tarame, which isn't exactly great for my tastes. She also has notable eyelashes, though they aren't too much of a problem. Melona also has flower-shaped pupils. I don't usually enjoy objects in eyes either, but considering the supernatural nature she has and the fact that it's black and actually look like pupils I don't mind too much. Technically I actually enjoy it as it helps notice the differences between Melona being disguised as someone and the person themselves (though I'm not sure if her transformation in Rebellion was noticeable). While she didn't do it in the show, that I remember, she does shapeshift into Cattleya in one official image. While nothing major having a canon shot of Melona, even if transformed, in glasses is nice. It also means that she can form glasses with transformations, though that's just me thinking of my tastes xD.
Grade: B-

Face: Again Melona can change shape here too. Shapeshifters are hard to blog on xD. Luckily Melona is a fairly cute character in her base form and doesn't look bad at all. She does have a fairly sizable nose which I'm not a fan of. She also has rosy cheeks as well as what seems to be lipstick around her mouth. Hmm, combined with the eyelashes it does look like she's wearing make-up in general, but she probably just makes herself look like that as it sorta fits her carefree attitude. Anyway her head looks acorn-like and is framed nicely by her hair. And hey, at least she looks feminine which is more than I can say about Cattleya!
Grade: B

Build: As with the previous areas, Melona can alter her body shape at will. This means that she does not have set measurements, unlike the other characters. That said her base form seems similar to a lot of other characters from the same series, at least the non-loli ones. She does have great legs and butt, the latter of which has a particularly spectacular shot in the second series ending. Really, her butt looks really rounded and soft-looking which is great!She really has an extremely sensual and beautiful body, really, and the series certainly doesn't hide it either. I suppose that I should count her tiny travel-size version when she becomes weakened, but that's balanced out by becoming a giantess in the manga. Overall she has an amazing body and the ability to change it at will makes her even more interesting!
Grade: A-

Breasts: Sadly Melona does not have a perfect body as this is where her problems are. While not too bad compared to some other girls, Melona still has a fairly large chest. It's one of the reasons she should require much more support than her “hands” can handle, pun unintended. Her walk cycle is fairly bouncy from what I can tell, which it probably wouldn't be if she had more support. But the main problem is, of course, that she shoots acid breast milk at opponents. This is a very silly thing and it's brought to ridiculous levels in the first episode no less. You see, Reina presses against Melona's chest and keeps her from spraying. As a result Melona gets huge breasts, to the point of exploding. As this is the first episode I wonder if a lot of people's opinions were judged just based on this poor (if goofy) scene. Speaking of expansion there's also a scene where it's revealed that she was disguised as Ymir through Rebellion. This comes with a scene of Melona returning to normal, starting sadly with her chest. That's also not counting that for whatever reason Ymir can become bustier in Rebellion with a transformation and it's double the horrible surprise. Overall Melona isn't too big, but her problems certainly are.
Grade: C

Clothes: Melona actually does fairly well here. As mentioned before she keeps her chest contained in her hair-hands. It's a very unique look, but due to the lack of support I dislike it. Other than that I don't mind her outfit, which is a transparent pink dress that fits her well. Especially as you can see her butt and she doesn't wear underwear (I think the front is blocked, fortunately). She also has a lot of variety as she can also transform her clothing. First I'll mention the outfits from the specials. First is her pink and white sailor outfit (as the specials are set in a school); while not bad and I like her bow I dislike how she still has her “hands full”, to say the least. She also wears pink panties with it, though they are wedgied up her butt. In the second season specials she seems to wear a black bikini, including top for once! In the Rebellion books she seems to wear a more queenly gown, a shame as it doesn't show her bum as well but I do like how her hands are supporting her chest from below as well as her larger sleeves. As far as transformations go, she has images where she's disguised as Irma, Elina in a leopardess outfit, Reina, Nowa, Tomoe, and Listy and she also disguises as Ymir (as said before). Other outfits include a geisha kimono, a barely-covered catgirl, a race queen with an umbrella, a Chinese dress, a gambler with cards, a maid, and a dragon. Considering Queen's Blade characters aren't known for their numerous outfits, usually at best having two, Melona's great variety is a great thing.
Grade: A-

Personality: Melona is a servant of the Swamp Witch, the main villain of the series. In particular she's good at espionage, which includes obtaining information and assassinations (the latter gives her the nickname “Protean Assassin” though she goes by “Protean Trickster” in Rebellion). As said quite a bit this is helped by Melona being a shapeshifting slime. That said, even though she's a servant she likes having fun over being obedient and serious. She likes toying around with others, especially in battle. This is because she's extremely strong and her slime-like body makes her nearly invulnerable. She could be described as being a little childish as she has the occasional outburst, but that just makes her more entertaining. She's willing to work with anyone but only if it benefits her. That said, don't call her a “monster” as that makes her upset. Overall, she makes for a good villain but we really don't have much of a backstory and she's relatively simple overall. Not a bad thing, mind you, but she makes for an interesting character.
Playing against her usual roles Melona is voiced by Rie Kugimiya. She portrays Melona's great, flirty personality well and I really like it. It's very seductive as well. That said it does cause some oddness as Rana is also portrayed by Kugimiya (though that lends itself well to one of Melona's disguises).
Grade: B

Libido: On one hand Melona is extremely perverse and sadistic. She's a very flirty and fun-loving girl that loves to tease others (especially toying with her opponents). Not only that but she doesn't have a problem with nudity. On the other hand she does suffer a bit as she really doesn't have a steady pairing. I suppose that Reina may count, due to being her first opponent in the series, but other than that she doesn't seem to have any set pairings.
Grade: B+

Age: Melona sadly has no official age. That said as a slime she likely doesn't age and she has the base figure of a young adult which works well here. Again Rebellion did hurt somewhat with the Ymir reveal, but I already punished her once for that.
Grade: B

Total Grades: 74
Average score: 8.2
Final Grade: B

And that's the blog for this week!

: WHAT THE?! I was expecting a better score than Zettai gave! What gives!

We do have different criteria, remember. Just because we're friends doesn't mean that we have to like the same things.

: Right. Like how Zettai has good tastes and Topaz is dumb and mamocentric!

Only sometimes! It's not my fault I'm extremely weak-willed...

: Don't worry. You won't have to feel bad for long. Take THIS!

*Melona swings her fist at Topaz, but he barely evades.*


: Not so fast!

*She changes the shape of her arm, wrenching it back and smacking her fist against Topaz's head. He takes 15 damage.*

: Oh no! Topaz!

Don't worry!

: Did you see that everyone? Melona is certainly using her transformation powers well in this battle! How will Topaz survive? Or will he not? Let's continue and find out!

Take THIS!

*Topaz tries to smack Melona in the back, but the slime girl expands her butt huge. As a result Topaz airbags off it and falls down. He stands up quickly.*

That's one huge tushie! My attacks bounce right off!

: Wahaha! What's the matter? Too distracted to fight?

Nonsense! I will stand my ground with honor!

: Quick, attack her chest! As a busty girl she deserves it!

Great plan! I might not have Rika's latest attack, but getting slapped would probably still hurt.

*Topaz goes and attempts to slap Melona's large breasts. However, she sucks them in and becomes flat chested. As a result Topaz stumbles forward, barely able to stay standing.*

: How foolish. Announcing what you're going to do beforehand while in earshot won't work! Though I do admit that I like this figure. Maybe I'll go tease Zettai with it, as he can appreciate my slim slimy beauty.

That's true, and he deserves all the fun he can get. Unfortunately, I have to defeat you here!

: HA!

*Melona returns to normal off-camera so dumb expansion isn't shown.*

: I've just been TOYING with you. I haven't even used the attack I'm most known for!

Oh no.

: You can't be serious!

We can't show that, this is a clean blog! Er, mostly, I guess. At the very least we have rules about what we can show, and that type of thing is a no-go!


Rules aren't eggs!

: Who cares, now prepare to die!

*Koto's head takes up half the screen, so that Melona is not seen. However, the assassin shoots her acid at Topaz and his evasion is seen.*

: Wow! What an, er, unorthodox style of fighting... Topaz is really on the ropes now!

: Topaz! Watch out!

What do you think I've been doing?!

*Melona keeps up her attack.*

: Mwahaha! What do you think of me NOW?!

You really ask me that while I'm being attacked?

: Fair point, but if you grovel to me and allow me to hand you over to Aldra this will be all over!

Never. I won't let the villain win!

: Suit yourself!

*Melona starts destroying the ground. Soon there's a large outcropping from the stones of the Arena getting lopsided.*

: Wow! What poor aim! Luckily there's a splash guard for our crowd in such an attack!

*The screen focuses on Melona about to hit the crowd with random acid spray, but magical barriers protect them.*

: But how can Topaz stand to defeat this Vicious Viscous Villain?!

*Topaz's eyes light up.*

Viscous... wait a second...

: Oh? Do you have some sort of idea to fight back? About time! You can't evade all day, and I'm getting bored just being a long-range shooter. Come, give me your best shot!


*Topaz puts his hand in his pants, and the whole arena flinches and boos.*

: REALLY TOPAZ?! Is this the best time for that?

: I know! Weren't you just just complaining about her attack?!

: Don't worry, ufufu. I bet I cause that reaction a lot.

It's not what you all are thinking. And they call me a pervert.

: You are.

Fair, but that's not my intent this time! Melona, take THIS!

*Topaz throws an object at Melona, but she forms her arms together to make a tower shield-sized defense.*

: You fool! I said that I can block any attack!

*However the sound of glass breaking and falling to the floor is heard.*

: H-huh... I'm feeling... funny...

*Suddenly Melona's butt becomes huge and balloon-like. It's at least twice the usual size.*

: What the?!

: What just happened?! We've seen Melona transform before, BUTT this seems caused by Topaz's attack.

That it was!

: I'm not sure how you got my body to do this, or why. I mean, other than looking sexy as all get out, but this doesn't give you any tactical advantage.

That's what you think!

*Topaz runs behind Melona, who turns much slower than normal due to her inflated backside.*

: Huff... Huff...

What's the matter? Why are you... DRAGGING YOUR BUTT?!

: That's not funny! Stop moving so fast too!

Plus your large trunk gives me the perfect target for THIS!

*Topaz throws another item from his pants, and hits Melona's jiggly slime butt. Again the sound of glass breaking is heard.*

: So you've got some more of those things. I'm not quite sure what they are, but-


*Melona lets out a huge fart.*

: Oh gag! How smelly and loud!

: You know Topaz, you cater to Zettai far too much.

More like I don't cater to him enough, considering all the problems I cause him. And those aren't even all the problems he has to go through either!

: Hey! Get your head back in the battle. Or I'll defeat you by sitting on you with my huge butt!

As great as that sounds, I can't be defeated here. Though, *cough* I probably shouldn't be standing behind you...

*Melona continues to fart repeatably.*

: Oh come on! They aren't even as bad as Airi's!

*Another voice over the loudspeaker is heard.*

: This isn't the time to say that! Stop embarrassing me publicly!

Right, don't be distracted and keep your head in the battle!

: You don't need to use my words against me! Here, take more firing!

*Melona prepares to “aim” again. Before she succeeds to “reveal” Topaz tosses a third glass item at her. As a result her breasts become so huge they drag, rendering her “weapons” useless.*

: How gross!

You're telling me! But strategically it works.

: Wow! At first it seemed like Melona had the upper hand, but whatever Topaz has been tossing at her seems to be affecting her coloring and body.

: You'll pay for ruining me like this!

I think I have the upper hand here! More mass means I don't have to aim as well!

*Topaz hits Melona while she's distracted. Her whole body trembles.*


*Then Melona becomes a giantess, towering over him.*

Wait, no! This should be against the rules!

: Worked for a certain green guy.

: Yeah, but they don't pay me enough to deal with this. I'm outta here!

*The announcer escapes towards the entrance.*

: MWAHAHAHA! Seems your random items have paid off in my favor! Now to squish you easily!

Oh yeah? Remember what I said about mass?

: Oh no...

That's right!

*Topaz takes two more items out of his inventory and throws both at Melona. Even though his accuracy would suffer he manages to hit with both.*

: I can barely feel such tiny specks. You'll never be able to defeat...FFFFWWWRRRPPP-er, defeat me!

*Melona goes to step on Topaz. However, instead she grows a beard.*


*Melona's body then rumbles the entire arena.*


: What?!

No time to explain!

*Topaz ducks behind the outcropping from before.*

: Fine then.

*Riri hides in the entrance to the arena. Just as she makes it Melona explodes with a loud BANG, covering the entire Arena with pink slime. Koto sticks her head out.*

: Er, well... Seems that Topaz is the victor here.

*Meanwhile, up in the VIP room Aldra stands up and walks away without saying a word.*

: Are you not going to say a word for her?

: *Without turning around* Harumph. She got what she deserved. She misjudged Topaz, and put her life on the line. She failed, and failing is not an option for my troops.

: But...

: Oh, and Airi. Clean up that mess. I don't need goop all over my precious Arena.

: But...

*Aldra turns, trying hard to keep from crying and yet a tear forms.*

: Are you going to betray me TOO?

: ... No, Aldra-sama.

*Aldra marches off. Back in the arena.*

*The crowd cheers. Ririchiyo also runs out to Topaz.*

: Congratulations! You defeated Melona! But what happened? What were those items you were throwing?


*Topaz pulls out a mostly empty case of vials.*

: Huh?

Remember the potions we got a while ago from Touko?

: Touko... Oh, the invisible school nurse... WAIT! You mean to say that all of Melona's transformations-

That's right! They were the effects of the various potions!

: But I thought you had to drink them for them to work...

Ah yes, but you have to remember that Melona is a slime. As a result any fluid that hits her would take affect immediately.

: Is that why she exploded too?

No, that was potion miscibility.

: Potion Mis-ability?

Miscibility. It means that the various ingredients in the potions worked against each other in such a way that it caused a giant explosion. I'm just lucky that it happened then, as I only have one potion remaining now...

*He pulls it out, showing off the label “INV.”*

: Hmmm, it's fortunate as giving Melona Invincibility would have made her unbeatable.

She'd be a Star, man!

: That was a horrible joke...

: Ahem!

Oh, you're still here?

: Of course. While Melona had you ending the blog as a wish if she won you get a prize as well.

Well then, I wish Melona was-

: We can't do that sort of thing.

Aww. Well then, I guess I just wish for some free time for relaxing.

: What a coincidence then.

*She hands Topaz two tickets.*

: I just happen to have these tickets to an idol show for next week. Why don't you take your girlfriend over there?

: I'm not a girlfriend!

And besides, how do we know that this isn't a trick?

: I'm not working THAT hard for Aldra...

Fair point. And look Riri, it's for a certain Dancing Bolt!

: Eh? Melotta used Thunderbolt?

Close, but not quite... But anyway, thanks for this prize.

: Welcome, thanks for the great battle. I'm sure that the fans enjoyed it!

Indeed. But it seems that this is where the blog ends for this week. Join us next time!

Posted by emperortopaz | Apr 28, 8:09 AM | 0 comments
April 21st, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-eighty-sixth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*We join Topaz and Ririchiyo outside his house. He is holding a box of donuts and opens the door.*

Welcome back everyone. I'm finally returning home today.

: Hopefully Rika and Topaz haven't been having wild parties.

*Rika greets them.*

: Welcome home, Ni-pah~

How adorable!

*Rika's eyes glare at Topaz as he attempts to hug her cute loli body.*

: Don't even think about it.

Fine then.

: Still, welcome back. And same to you too, Ririchiyo. I assume that it was hard work keeping him on track.

: Honestly dealing with all the girls trying to kill Topaz was more difficult.

: Sounds interesting. Let's talk about it in the living room.

Certainly. Here, let me put down this box of donuts I got as an apology in the kitchen.

*Topaz sets them down on the counter and the three of them sit down in the living room.*

Now, it all started with-

*A loud crashing noise comes from the outside, as if something broke into Topaz's house.*

Oh no! Not again!

: I knew we shouldn't have come back while there were still attempts after your life!

: Quick, check the bathroom! That's where they came last!

*The trio rushes to the bathroom. It seems pristine.*

Wow, the government really returned this to the former glory after January.

: Now isn't the time to appreciate our washroom. There's someone attacking!

Good point!

*The three rush to the bedroom, but no one seems to have broken in.*

Phew, looks like no one is here.

: Of course. You're bedroom will never make noise! (Er, that wasn't too mean I hope...)

Nice joke, though I'm alright and proud of that. But if it wasn't one of these rooms where could it be?

: The kitchen!

But isn't that a little overdone? I mean, with all the girls breaking through that way can't I come up with anything better?

*The trio hurry to the kitchen. There, they see a large hole and a girl with long dark hair sitting with a sword.*

Oh come on!

: Well, I guess that at this point it's more of a running joke. And like Working you sure love your running jokes!

But she burst through the wall and is probably going to kill me!

: Not only that, but she ate ALL the donuts!

*Rika shakes the donut box and only crumbs come out.*

: That fiend!

: Go show her the arrow of her ways, Topaz!

Don't you mean "error" of her-

*Topaz turns back and sees Rika trying to arm a crossbow.*

: What? That's not the saying?

We're not going to shoot her with a crossbow!

: Agreed. While ignoring Topaz's poor excuse for strength we need to save the uses on those weapons for a better time!

Besides, where did you find that?

: I have a lot of torture devices laying around.

I guess people really do have odd collections. Hey, do you have a morning star?

: Two, in fact. Though one is in pretty rough shape.

Well then, get the good morning star.

: Alright then!

*Rika goes off to get it while Riri facepalms.*

: You just wanted to use that joke didn't you... I mean sheesh, "Good Morning" star...

Hey, I know a guy who beat up an alien invasion with one! Well, by that point it was a Shooting Star but still...

: This is no time to be talking about retro NES games!

I thought that was almost all we talk about during blogs?

: NO!

*The assassin pops the last bit of donut in her mouth.*

???: Now that I am out of donuts it is time for you to face me!

*She stands up and draws her katana. She then lunges at Topaz, who barely avoids it.*

: Who is this even?!

Can't you tell? I mean her show was fairly recent...

Posted by emperortopaz | Apr 21, 7:14 AM | 0 comments
April 14th, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-eighty-fifth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

Welcome back everyone. In case you haven't been following my blogs for the past, what, four months?-anyway, I got badly damaged in battle last November and was in the hospital for most of December. As a result I got a lot of expenses and, since the New Year began or so I've been trying to work them off. However, as it turns out I recently paid them off and I can finally return home!


Agreed. Now hopefully nothing happens.


*Crickets chirp as the two wait patiently for something to happen. Topaz even clears his throat.*

W-well, seems like there isn't anything waiting. Which is odd as last week Aldra, the keeper of the Colosseum, sent Nagisa here to kill me. Luckily as you can see he did a poor job of it.

: Fortunately. I can only imagine what I'd be doing if you weren't here...

Is that a love confession? It sure sounded like one!

*Ririchiyo is flustered.*

: NO IT WAS NOT! Come on, or I'll leave you in my dust!

*Riri leaves the room, carrying a few boxes of Topaz's stuff.*

I'm coming, I'm coming!

*He hurries out, but has completely lost Ririchiyo.*

Well, glasses. Now I've lost her...

*Topaz looks around, but goes down a different hallway as Ririchiyo. The lights up above start to flash, and Topaz soon realizes that he's not alone.*


*He turns around and sees a masculine figure. The figure then tosses an object at him, which he barely evades. The object turns out to be a knife as Topaz's sleeve gets cut by it.*

Hey, watch it there!

???: That was only a warning. Do not think that I'll miss the next one!

*The shadowy figure walks up draws another knife. "He" then attempts to slash Topaz, but the blogger grabs the thrown knife and defends. He then gets a good look at the assailant's face.*

W-wait. I know who you are. You're... TSUGUMI SEISHIROU!

*Tsugumi raises her head, finally revealing her face from the shadows.*

: So I've been identified. I guess that's what I get for wearing boys clothes, I'm not sure WHY but I seem to get identified better in them... N-nevermind. What of it?

I can't believe that you'd come and attack me!


*Tsugumi backs away and reaches into her pocket for a handgun. In the split second Topaz was able to dive into a nearby classroom and dive under a desk. Tsugumi then unloads on the classroom windows, breaking them yet the glass fortunately doesn't hit Topaz. She tosses the empty gun aside.*

: Aldra told me all about you!

*Topaz pops out of his hiding spot.*

She's obviously lying as she's trying to have me killed! She wants my demonic energy!

: Sounds like YOU'RE the one lying! Who would EVER believe such nonsense. You sound like a chuunibyou!

EL PSY CONGROO! Wait, no. I'm telling the truth!

: Don't toy with me! I know exactly what you're doing, and it's not working!

*Tsugumi pulls out a rocket launcher.*

I think that's a bit too much fire power!

: This is no time to hold back!

*Topaz backs away, and eventually gets to a familiar window.*

Gasp... The window from last year... How lucky.

: What are you blabbing about this time?


: Good. Now hold still...

*As Tsugumi fires the rocket Topaz leaps through the window. The room explodes behind him, and Topaz lands in the pool safely. He moves to the side as Tsugumi leans outside.*

: You may think that you've gotten away this time, but you won't get lucky twice!

*Tsugumi jumps out the window and chases Topaz, who has just escaped from the pool. As they run Tsugumi continues to shoot at Topaz, switching guns as needed. Fortunately her poor aim while running means he doesn't get hit. Eventually Ririchiyo starts running up.*


: What's going on? Is it Miia or Lunar again?

*Riri starts running alongside Topaz.*

No! It's another assassin!

: I hope this one isn't another trap...

Reverse trap, but close enough.

: Listen, you there. I warn you to not interfere in my destruction of Topaz!

: Why can't we have a week where someone DOESN'T try to kill you?

You think I want to be running for my life?

: You could use the exercise. Still, why don't you use something to stop this?

I thought that was your job?

: I suppose, but-

*While distracted Tsugumi finds the time to shoot Topaz in the right calf. He falls to the ground wounded, skidding slightly and taking 30 damage.*


: Finally, took long enough for my shots to finally hit you!

: That's true. Are we sure that she's not a stormtrooper?

: Heh. But this is no time for jokes as I'll end your life Topaz!

*Tsugumi approaches the sitting Topaz, who is cradling his leg. However, Topaz's mind races and he thinks about the previous blog-

-and he throws the knife he was holding onto upward. Tsugumi steps back as he does that, giving him time to stand on his good leg and he claps in front of Tsugumi's face. She's barely dazed, but it gives Ririchiyo the time to tackle the would-be assassin. Riri and Tsugumi then fall to the floor, with the half-demon sitting on top. Riri's also sitting so that Tsugumi is face down and is keeping her hands pinned to her back.*

: CURSES! I can't believe that you knew about the sure-kill technique!

Much like using X-Accuracy and OHKO moves in the first two gens. But enough about that, I want answers!

: NEVER! I'll never reveal my personal measurements!

Not those, I want to know why you're attacking me.

: I told you before, because Aldra ordered me to!

But I don't get why. I'd imagine that you were around Chitoge...

: Well, I WAS! But then she decided to join the seven sins and attack this one blogger. Then she left again to defeat a magical princess's plot armor and I haven't seen her since!

: Wait, that's Zettai's blog!

: What's a "Zettai"?

Zettai is an awesome friend of mine, even if he refuses to think so.

: He likes to remain modest, unlike Topaz here.

But now I'm wondering why you joined Aldra's crew.

: Well, I wasn't expecting it either. I had just heard rumors that my Ojousama was defeated by a slime girl in an eating contest. As a result I went to find that pink bunny-eared girl and she told me she'd help look if I promised to find this "Topaz" fellow.

: That must be Melona! She's been a thorn in our side for quite some time.

Right, and that gets me worried as to what the other two may be up to...

: Wait, so you DON'T know where Ojousama is?

No, and I really don't care either.

: TOPAZ! Be nice!

What? I don't like Chitoge and Raku should get with Marika or Kosaki. Preferably the former.

: Be that as it may, can someone get this loli off me?

Why would you want to? I bet her butt feels soft on your back.

: Leave my plump loli rump out of this!

Hey, how about this. You let me blog about you and I'll let you go.

: I-I guess I can do that. Just don't say anything too perverse!

I'll try my best not to, but I hold no promises. But as she's given me permission...

Today's "girl" is:

Seishirou Tsugumi

: Ahem!

What is it?

: You did it again.


: You forgot to remove the quotations around "girl" again.

Oh, is that right? Meh, I'm lazy and she was raised as a boy so it shouldn't matter.


Fine fine!

Today's girl is:

Seishirou Tsugumi


: I guess.

And you don't mind me calling you "Tsugumi", right?

: *Sigh* I suppose, though only because you've been calling me that anyway.

: Enough stalling, get on with the blog.

Hair: Tsugumi has quite good hair for my tastes-mostly. About the only problem is that her hair is extremely short, not even reaching her shoulders. That said it does help out her reverse trap-ness as it does make her look like a boy. That is, until she gets a big blue bow from Chitoge as that helps make her a bit more feminine looking. Kinda like how in cartoons or video games they'd add a bow to a female character (think of Ms. Pac-Man for example). Many characters from Nisekoi are characterized by their hair features, and the bow is Tsugumi's. Occasionally, if Tsugumi is in need of a disguise, she does have a wig with long hair. It even has braids that come over her shoulders as well. As far as the rest of her hair, it's a nice style with the sides sticking out a bit and a long middle bang. I will say that there's a problem that she nearly has Raku's, the male lead's, hairstyle xD (luckily he also has an X on the side of his face). She also styles it at one point by having one of those “classic” beauty styles with one long bang on the side (not over her eye though) and it looks really pretty. Of course, we can't forget the main reason I like Tsugumi's hair. That's of course the color. While normally black in the manga her hair seems to be more of a dark navy on top with a layer of black on bottom. It looks pretty neat and mixes two dark colors that I like together. Overall her hair is nice and the biggest problem, the short length, actually helps her a bit.
Grade: A-

Eyes: Tsugumi has pretty nice eyes. Sadly while she starts with a fairly strong tsurime she has been becoming more rounded after she starts becoming more confident in herself. That said they still lean inward and I like how her eye is shaped as well. Minus the eyelashes I guess, but they're hardly noticeable in the actual series. And surprisingly, as Tsugumi has dark hair, I actually don't mind her red eyes. The fact that she has a tsurime helps as well, making her look intimidating. Her eyes are also really pretty, though that could be said for most characters from the series.
Sadly as Tsugumi is a “familiar” in the Magical Kosaki spin off that means that she doesn't wear glasses in that. I can't recall if she wears glasses or not in the actual series either. I will say that she wore glasses in an image from the now-defunct Majikore game. They were a nice lower frame pair (though thick frames would be better), but sadly it's a bit too little. Luckily there are other meganekkos like Ruri and Yui to help the series, just not Tsugumi herself.
Grade: B

Face: Tsugumi starts out somewhat intimidating, but like with her eyes she becomes softer as the series progresses. She's also somewhat lean-looking, though her chin is still soft and rounded. She also has a mole near her right eye. Overall she has small features and a dot nose, appealing well to me. She's also said to look fairly “handsome” which works well for her and I mean that in a good way of course. She also seems to have fair skin, though that just means that she has really brilliant blushes. This is one point where Nisekoi does really well, they show a lot of silly emotion in faces and I like that fact. There's also something to be said for the imbalance between Tsugumi's hardened assassin-like demeanor and the easily-flustered personality. I wouldn't say that I'm a big fan of “gap moe” (especially as I dislike that term) but it works really well for Tsugumi.
Grade: A

: For someone who was wounded you sure talk a lot.

Don't worry. The only hit point that matters is the last one.

: Then why did you slump down and act like you couldn't walk?

Oh? That wasn't part of the special move? I thought that since it was a leg attack I'd have to be slow for a period of time.

: Life isn't a video game, Topaz!

But video games are life!

: They aren't actually...

Besides, look at this!

*Topaz shows off the leg. All it has is a big bruise, though not a painful looking one.*

: What the?

It's THIS!

*Topaz hold up a bead-like bullet.*

: It's an anti-sensei bullet!

: D'oh! I must have grabbed that Nagisa kid's gun by mistake.

I'm lucky for that, and as a result I'll continue this blog!

Build: Tsugumi seems to be 162 cm and 48 kg, meaning she's a somewhat tall (by normal standards). Sadly we don't have her other measurements, though. Luckily despite being strong she doesn't seem especially bulky or ripped, being more lean with some nice fair legs and arms. She does have a really nice narrow waist and lovely butt that occasionally gets a shot (there's at least one good one in the second season during the pool episode). The anime also helps, with SHAFT giving her smoother features and showing her off a bit more than the manga does. Overall she's a great curvy girl though she does have a problem caused by the following area... Oh, and as mentioned before she's a familiar in the spin-off. This means that she has a form where she's a cat with a blue-ish fur color, though I won't count that against her.
Grade: A-

Breasts: Tsugumi is definitely a chest girl. A lot of her non-standard outfits tend to emphasize her chest and a lot of attention is brought to it. The other girls fondle it, to the point where one supporting girl calls her “Miss Boobs” or something along those lines after fondling Tsugumi. As a result of her being busty she also inadvertently makes her rival Paula jealous. Even the fates mock them as when they're picking out fortunes Tsugumi gets one that reads “they're still growing” about her chest while Paula's mocks hers (when it really should compliment her DFC). Speaking of growing I'll mention that during the hot springs episode it's said that Tsugumi was at least an E-cup and that she's gotten bigger as the series goes on. That's one of the problems as while Tsugumi isn't exactly showing off her chest the other characters, especially the girls, tend to bring her size up. She even gets a bit of a complex from it! And that's not counting all the show's moments either; while probably more reserved than a lot of other series Nisekoi can get pretty mamocentric and as the largest girl Tsugumi gets “picked on” as a result. I dislike when “busty” becomes a character trait, and it's becoming increasingly more common for reverse traps ever since Charlotte in IS (though it likely happened prior too).
That said, taken at face value which is what I score on, Tsugumi is quite nice. She's obviously busty and I don't mind “hidden busty” girls either as it makes the time between fanservice shots easier for people who don't like that type of character to handle. SHAFT's animation style also works well, giving her a nice bounce and her chest looked especially soft when prodded. While the standard series is in Jump and as a result doesn't show nipples, the spin-off Magical Kosaki does and, while Tsugumi doesn't show hers until a few chapters in they don't look bad. Overall, what keeps Tsugumi from a perfect score is oddly enough all the attention her chest gets. If only Marika's butt got that much attention to balance!
Grade: A

Clothes: Tsugumi has really great variety in her outfits. She mainly wears a male school uniform which consists of a white shirt, khaki pants (it seems, at least), and a red necktie. She also occasionally wears a blue blazer, though she keeps it unbuttoned most of the time so it's more like a jacket. The reason she wears boys clothes is that she finds it easier to move around in them as opposed to girl's clothes. She does wear the girl's uniform on occasion, though not often (mostly either as a disguise or as Chitoge or Paula's suggestion). It's fortunate as the girl's uniform is far more plain, as it's a basic white sailor outfit with blue collar, a blue skirt, and a red necktie. Underneath she seems to wear a cute flowery bra, though we don't see her panties to see if they match.
Don't think that's it, that's far from her only outfit. Though she does seem to wear it at home, but still. She does have some nice casual outfits, though I can't think of any in particular that stood out. She's also worn a couple bikinis, the first one being a tube top that I'm not fond of (though it's likely because it was short notice and Tsugumi wouldn't fit in anything else) but the blue striped one with yellow shirt was cute. There's also a chapter where she goes through a clothing roulette pretty much for her job, putting on a bunnygirl outfit, a one-piece swimsuit, a Chinese dress with cleavage window, and a great waiter outfit. The latter was how she was found out. Before that she also wore a couple of dresses, one frilly and the other being very sleek and fitting Tsugumi's curves well. In Magical Kosaki she wears a strapless witch's outfit with long gloves and big hat. In one piece of official art the girls are wearing fruit outfits as chibis, and Tsugumi is a melon (hopefully not for the obvious joke). The Majikore game also helps out, putting Tsugumi in a lot of outfits including a sukumizu, gym uniform with blue buruma, a cheerleader, a race queen, a nice blue leotard, a naval uniform with nice hat, a ninja, a stewardess, a maid, a miko outfit, and many more. She even cosplays as Sayaka from Magical Madoka! Overall she has a great variety and looks great even dressed as a male. If her chest wasn't so forced at times I could see her getting a perfect score here, curse that!
Grade: A


*Tsugumi struggles under Ririchiyo.*

What is it now?

: You've said such... embarrassing things.

To be fair I talk about such things in most blogs. You just happened to have a lot more to talk about.

: Well, it is fair that you talked about her chest too much. Zettai needs his service too!

Well, I suppose that we can have Tsugumi sit and fart on a cake.


: We can't do something like that, Topaz!

Yeah, you're right. He'd much prefer Marika doing that. Just sitting her ojou butt down and ripping a loud stinker without shame. Bet she'd get frosting on her butt, though most of it would wave as she lets out that visible gas...

: Er, you sure this is for your friend and not yourself?

Oh, sorry. I was trying to get him to imagine it.

: Well, enough of that. I meant she hasn't equipped the chocolate cake. And she's not a Huniecam girl. And- WHY DO I KNOW THESE THINGS!!

*She rubs the top of her head in frustration.*

: I have no clue what you two are talking about, but can we just get on with the blog. Me being a part of this conversation is nearly as embarrassing as cake fa-er, what you two were talking about.

How modest, yet adorable.


Fine, fine... Let's finish things up.

Personality: Tsugumi is first introduced as Chitoge's bodyguard and a potential rival for Raku. Tsugumi then ends up chasing him across the school, attacking him but eventually giving up. We also find out that she's a she, a reverse trap, at that point as well. We also learn that she's loyal to Chitoge, who she calls “ojou-sama”, due to a childhood promise. Tsugumi was an orphan, eventually raised by Claude who works for Chitoge. That said he gave her the name “Seishirou” as he didn't realize that Tsugumi is a girl. Even to this point, which is really odd and shows how dense Claude is. Then again Tsugumi had to be told about the fake relationship and that wasn't until recently, nearly 200 chapters in or so and at least two years in-series. Anyway Tsugumi was raised into an assassin, nicknamed “Black Tiger”, and goes off on missions occasionally (which may explain her somewhat spotty appearances).
Tsugumi is a strong character, possibly having the most character growth in the series yet not showing it. As the series progresses she starts becoming a bit more feminine, though not without losing her masculine coolness either (unlike a lot of other characters). And that coolness is one of the things that drew me easily to Tsugumi. She's always ready for combat and I like her blunt way of speaking (even if it's not readily realized). I also like her easily-flustered side as well, it's really cute. She's also a lot more comfortable with her feminine side as well, though she still looks quite fine in the boy's uniform. She also dislikes ghosts and is a skilled chef, being about as good as Raku. She also lives alone in her apartment, though I think Paula, her assassin rival “White Fang”, may be staying with her. I do like Tsugumi, but she does remind me a lot of Naoto from Persona 4. This isn't a bad thing exactly, but the resemblance is uncanny and it's almost like Tsugumi is a rip-off. Speaking of rip-offs while Tsugumi does get a fair amount of character-based chapters she suffered early on from the same thing Nao from Smile Precure did; the chapters revolved more around an invention she found rather than Tsugumi herself. Overall she's a fine girl that may have scored better if she appeared in the spotlight more. And by “her” I obviously don't mean just her chest as that needs to stop being a character trait.
Grade: A-

Libido: At first Tsugumi doesn't really know what “love” is. She thinks it's an illness and spends a lot of the series pondering if it's love or not. She eventually does confess to Raku, though he is unconscious at the time. She thinks it's enough though, and it does show that she has a fair bit of libido towards him. That said she's probably the least likely girl of the main four to win as she doesn't even have a key. Yeah, that sounds unusual (especially as the series itself seems to forget that plot token lately) but it does make sense if you read/watch the series. The married-couple moments were cute, at least and I liked Chitoge being a fat dog. That said, Tsugumi has her fair share of admirers. Both male and female, though the former are taken more seriously. She gets chocolate from girls on Valentine's day, for example. Tsugumi is also devoted to Chitoge, but it's not a romantic love. She also stands down for Chitoge due to her relationship with Raku, even after she finds out the relationship is fake (in the beginning, at least). Tsugumi, when drunk, also gives her rival Paula a passionate kiss. I'd probably say that's the relationship that Tsugumi will end up with, even if it's not a romantic one (and I don't mind yuri rivals getting together unlike yaoi ones). I suppose that I can mention the Tsugumi/Tsugumi pairing as the series has shown it in chapter covers and in endings. Basically it's the masculine and feminine versions of Tsugumi looking cute together, though I would consider that a cop-out.
Grade: B-

Age: I'm not sure where it is pointed out, but Tsugumi seems to be seventeen. Even if that's not accurate she is with the other characters and currently in the third year of high school (the series started during their first year). For added information her birthday is July 30th but Chitoge decided that as Tsugumi doesn't actually know when she was born.
Grade: A-

Total Grades: 88
Average score: 9.8
Final Grade: A-

And that's the blog for today!

: FINALLY! Now can you get your assistant off my back?

Why would you want that? Riri's loli butt feels great!

: Shut up! What we do in private doesn't need to get out!

*She stands up allowing Tsugumi to get up herself. The assassin brushes herself off.*

: Phew! Am I ever glad to be out from under her.

I agree, more time for Riri to sit on MY back!

: I'm not sitting on your back! NYAH!

*She sticks her tongue out at Topaz.*

I'm not picky. I guess that Tsugumi can do it too...

: What kind of floozy do you think I am?

One that dresses like this:

: Uwawaha! W-where did you get that picture? And WHY did you show it?!

Internet, obviously. And since you did so well according to my blog you were able to win a prize of a bonus image!

: Been a while since one of those. Glad the tradition is still here as almost forgot about it.

I know, and that is a lovely foot!


*Riri manages to hold Tsugumi back by grabbing her from behind.*

: Topaz! Do something!

Err, I don't know what to do. Perhaps giving her something would help...

*Topaz reaches into his inventory.*

Let's see... random potions, mint from Yui Horie... hmmm, I don't think Tsugumi would like any of these things?

: What's that in your hand?

Oh, that? That's just the bullet I got from Reika.

: Hey, let me see that.

Y-you don't want to shoot me with it, right?

: No. I'm a collector of such things.

Fine then, release her.

*Ririchiyo releases Tsugumi, who then takes the bullet out of Topaz's hands. She investigates it closely.*

: Just as I thought. A .303 British. I've been looking for one of these for ages!

So that's something you want?

: Of course! This was first developed in Britain in 1888, and was standard until the 1950's. And look at these grooves! Not to mention this looks like the Mk II, which was discontinued when explosive bullets were deemed "inhumane" and-

*Tsugumi continues to fangirl about the bullet.*

So is that something you'd want?

*Tsugumi blushes cutely at her behavior and attempts to go back to looking collected.*

: Ahem, I suppose that it is. I apologize for my earlier behavior.

: Don't worry, Topaz is a pervert so it's not just you.

: Anyway, I feel bad taking such a rare bullet without a gift in exchange.

*She looks through her pockets, which she has due to wearing pants, and pulls out a ribbon similar to the one on her head.*

: I suppose that you can have my spare ribbon. I keep it in case the one I lose the one ojousama gave me, at least until I find it again.

That's a good plan. So what, does it make me immune to status ailments?

: What? No?

: You can't equip it anyway Topaz. You're neither a female nor a dancer.

My victory against Kanon a few years back says otherwise. But either way thanks for the ribbon, Tsugumi.

*She blushes.*

: T-think nothing of it, idiot!

???: Hey, what are you doing here?

*A "familiar" voice is heard.*

: Eh? Tsugumi? What are you doing here in the school so late at night?

: Uh er uh... I was waiting for you, of course.

: That's good to hear. I had traveled down to the school store to buy some of the special donuts, but it seems that even waiting there they had so many reservations that I couldn't get one. I was also scouting around for when we watch the meteors next week too.

: A shame. How about we return home, ojousama?

: I suppose so, but how about we stop by a beef bowl place on the way. I'm famished.

: Whatever you say, ojousama.

*Tsugumi and Chitoge leave.*

Well, looks like alls well that ends well. Though would be better if you sat on my back.

: W-well, now that no one's around I GUESS I can.

*Topaz gets on all fours and Ririchiyo sits her loli bum on his back.*

: But don't think that this makes everything up with Zettai! He's probably still in a bad mood from all the things you said about Tsugumi.

Well, I can't lie on my blogs. But it's still better than wild fanboyism without properly explaining things like my early blogs or stuffing horrible mamocentric pictures and gifs in it. I could think of a HUNDRED things that could make it worse.

: That's a bad pun, and you know it.

*She kicks him, though not hard.*

True. But now I have to wonder what sort of person we'll be facing next time.

: True, it's not like we have any sort of hint. I guess our readers will just have to check it out for themselves!

See you all next week!

Posted by emperortopaz | Apr 14, 8:06 AM | 0 comments
April 7th, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-eighty-fourth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*We see Topaz equipped in his standard crossing guard uniform with vest, helping kids through crosswalks. Once they're all safely across he finally gives his introduction.*

Welcome back everyone. Last month I was quite busy, doing the Smile Precure girls while facing down Melona's attacks. I even had to have a Pokémon battle last week! Hopefully this week will be less hectic. Oh, and you're probably wondering where Ririchiyo is this time. I'm not sure either, but she told me that she could trust me this week because-

*Topaz clears his throat and a near-flawless imitation of his assistant's voice comes out.*

: I'm pretty sure that I can trust you not to do anything disgusting to TRAPS. Please don't prove me wrong though.

She shouldn't worry though, I'm not that perverse. Oh, and I should mention that this week, as the first week in April, is my blog's annual trap blog. I figure that I should mention that.

*As Topaz is talking a figure that's about the size and figure of a short middle school girl sneaks up behind him. She has a knife drawn, the bright sun reflecting off the metallic blade. The girl also has a great amount of bloodlust in her glowing eyes, though the rest of her figure is undisguisable.*

But I wonder where he could be...

*Topaz seems completely unaware of the assassin behind him. Their hand is about to grab his neck while the knife approaches as well. However, completely coincidentally a volleyball is flying at him with high velocity.*

: OH NO! Topaz, watch out!

Gasp! A flying ball! I'd better use my mimicry to avoid it!

*Topaz thinks hard about the previous girl, picturing her in his mind-

-However, due to Miyuki's clumsiness he takes the ball directly to the face. This causes him to be flung backwards into the assassin, knocking both to the ground. The knife slides away harmlessly, but Topaz does take 10 damage from the speedy ball and impact of the ground. Akane runs up to the two.*

: Sorry 'bout that, Topaz. I guess I dan't know mah own strength sometimes.

*She picks up the ball and leaves, letting Topaz and the would-be assassin to get up. Topaz soon recognizes the not-female crossdresser behind him.*

You're Nagisa Shiota!

: Uuugh... I guess my cover was blown.

What are you doing here?

: I was told by Aldra to come kill you. Well, technically that one "Melona" girl told me to, but still.

But I thought you didn't want to be an assassin anymore!

: This is all a bit complicated...

==Flashback music==

*Nagisa is bowing in front of Aldra, who is up a few steps on her throne. Melona is standing beside the young boy.*

: What have we here? A pathetic MALE?

: He may be male, but that's just what we need.

: Elaborate!

: Obviously if we choose a girl to champion against Topaz he'll just blog about them and they'd decide not to attack. However, if we send a guy like THIS after him he has no hope but to give up.

: There's just one problem. I have no reason to listen to your requests. I'm not an assassin...

: Once you have a talent for assassination, it does not easily leave. And the seed of a beast has been implanted into you. Not literally, of course.

: I may have the talent, but that doesn't mean I'll work for such evil people!

: Oh? But I have someone very special to you!

*Melona pulls a cloth off a nearby cage, revealing a tentacled teacher.*

: NAGISA! Help me please!

: Korosensei? What are you doing there?!

: It doesn't matter, just do as they say and they'll let me go!

: Wait, wouldn't it be better if you just stayed in there?

: Nurufufufu... Am I such an unworthy teacher that you would not rescue me?

: I suppose you do deserve saving.

: That's good, because this is an Anti-Sensei cage and I can't get out on my own.

: Perfect. Now here's what I want you to do...

==Flashback ends==

That's quite the informational flashback. Though I wonder how they were able to capture Korosensei.

: I wondered that as well, and even asked Korosensei afterward.

==Flashback music==

*After the previous flashback, and both Aldra and Melona have left.*

: This is all your fault, Korosensei.

: Nurufufufu~ Think of it as a learning opportunity. But I do wish that you did not have to kill this Topaz fellow.

: So how were you caught?

: A carefully executed and devious plan, obviously!

==Flashback within flashback==

*Korosensei is hiding in the bushes, reading a gravure magazine with a huge grin on his yellow face. He hears some women speaking and looks over at them like a creep.*

: Oh my. My super-large breasts are so heavy! I'd better duck into this building, where anyone could sneak up and fondle them...

: Y-yes- *whispers* Are thou assured that this lecher shall fall for such an obvious falsehood?

: *whispers back* Maybe if ONE OF US was better at acting we wouldn't have had to rehearse so much!

: I take offense! Still thy tongue as at least I am still a woman of honor!

: Stuff that honor up that gigantic horse butt you have and swallow your pride. *back to talking loudly.* M-man, who knew that a totally topless hot tub would be inside this building. I can't wait to show everything off!

*She enters the building.*

: I-Indeed, mine shoulders doth hurt from mine hefty bosom...

*Centorea also enters, and Korosensei slides up behind them.*

: Nurufufufu~ Truly this will be an enriching day...

*As he enters the darkened building a cage falls on top of him.*

: Knew that would get him!

: Mayhaps this shall teach thou not to be a letcher, especially towards the upper region of females.

: Whatever. I'm just glad that we didn't catch another idiot this time.

: Quite. That male with the hand of drakes would not stop uttering that aggravating word.

: Not to mention the half-fiend with the powerful dimensional blade or the one who draws from perversion... Ever notice that guys are idiots?

: I agree with thou's statement. Although I am not a strong case I hath noticed a distinct lack of butt-loving males from your Japanese entertainment.

: I met one, once! His name was Zettai and it was loads of fun playing with him too!

*The two leave, still talking as they bring Korosensei with them back to the Aldra's fortress.*

==Flashback within ends==

: Is that supposed to encourage me to save you? Cause it doesn't help...

: Please! Please! Allow me to be your teacher once again.

: FINE! But I might still betray you and kill you myself.

: Nurufufufu~ I wouldn't have it any other way...

==Flashback ends==

*Topaz and Nagisa are sitting on a hill talking, as the crossing guard job has been long done.*

I'm glad my perversion didn't end up being used like that. Though at least I'm intelligent, most of the time.

: I can see that. So what is this "blog" thing Aldra wants to destroy you for?

I'm not sure why she wants to destroy me over it, but I just talk about girls.

: That doesn't seem too troubling.

If you only knew some of the things I've gone through... I've saved the world more times than I can count. Wait, no, it's about four, I'd say.

: Wow! You've really put yourself in peril quite a bit. Compared to me...

Nonsense, you're a great person as well. In fact, if you'd allow it I'd love to blog about you.

: I don't know if you know this, but I AM a boy...

I'll take your word about it... So then what's with that outfit?

: That Melona girl said I'd hide better like this and you wouldn't suspect me as much. I would like to take it off, but I don't have any pants.

That's fair. I can't say I disagree with her tactics as you did sneak up on me better. And don't worry, I have a tradition where I talk about cute boys like you.

: That kinda sounds gross...

Don't worry, I'm not a creepy person. Mostly.

: In that case, I suppose that I should allow it. Maybe it'll get me out of punishment from Aldra.

We can only hope that Aldra won't be angry as...

Hair: Nagisa has a very unique hairstyle, and I can't say I enjoy it too much. Not that it's bad, but rather there's a lot of things that sorta bug me. The main problem is that it looks like he has short hair, but if it gets put down it reaches his shoulders. His hair length is a choice by his mother, and I'll get to that later on, but sadly this means that when he gets older in the epilogue he cuts it short. He also has his hair up in twintails of sorts, his hair being the spiked and plant-like variety. I liked seeing Kaede, another student, put his hair up like this as I found that to be a cute scene, but I'm not a big fan of Nagisa's hairstyle. Though even down it looks somewhat masculine, I'm not sure why I think that (possibly due to how messy it is), but probably my favorite hair from him is that in flashbacks he has a ponytail. Perhaps it's because her hair seems straighter, compared to his layered look having more curves. His hair is a light blue which contrasts with most of the cast having more realistic colors (in the manga it makes his hair white, which is cool but also doesn't really fit him). I would have liked if his hair was a darker blue. Oh, and he has cute ribbons in it when he's forced to crossdress. Overall there's a lot of gripes, and while I'm not a huge fan I will say that Nagisa has a very unique hair style.
Grade: C+

Eyes: Nagisa has much better eyes than he does hair, though. At first you might think that they're fairly standard, but he didn't get listed as one of the most beautiful eyes in anime for nothing (for all that MAL lists are important). But they do have a really great shape, even if it takes a bit for him to grow into his tsurime. Add that to the fact that his eye color matches his eyes and you've got a winner! I may have dismissed his hair before, but I do think that his eyes are a bit darker in the gradient near the top which helps a lot. His eye color also fits well with his outfit too, which is always good to see. Nagisa also only has two lines that make up his eye, the upper strong tsurime and about half of his eye facing outward. Okay, so he has a few more for emphasis, but the main point I'm trying to get across is that he lacks a lower line. This works well with the art style, which seems to focus on the unusual pupils of the characters. Nagisa has great eyes for me, though sadly he doesn't wear glasses. I will mention that he does wear safety goggle when in chemistry class, though we don't see that too much.
Grade: B

Face: Nagisa's face is pretty average, at least as far as the AssClass characters go. There's not much detail and the small features definitely help, especially with his dot nose. His head is acorn-shaped though he does have curve around his eyes. I do like a lot of the emotions he has though. There's the tough, bloodlust-filled version where he's smiling despite the combat and yet still looking intimidating, but he also has a cute blush when forced to crossdress. He also is said to look feminine, but I think that's just because he doesn't look GAR like Karasuma or especially notable as his face is similar to the likes of Karma and others. At least he doesn't get the titan-type face from his mother too (which is a nickname from her explosive personality in the second season of the anime where she looks similar to a titan from Attack on Titan).
Grade: B-

Build: Nagisa is pointed out by the series to be the smallest boy in the class. And that's likely true as he's 159 cm tall and weighs 48 kg. He desires to grow taller, especially when he becomes an adult, but sadly for him (and a relief for me) he only gains a single centimeter in the seven year time skip. He's also fairly feminine in the way he carries himself, and is called androgynous by most of the cast. He even gets the nickname “Gender” during the nickname battle (though I'm not sure what the Japanese name was). They don't get confirmation until he swims in the class's pool and it's commented on. Nagisa does have a guy's body and has some muscle, but not enough to take away from his figure which I like. I also like him showing that, despite his size, he can be quite powerful. Body-wise Nagisa is fairly slim but has some wide hips (though it's likely just because the pockets on the outfit are rather bulky). Overall while Nagisa has a fairly standard shota-body it doesn't cater quite as well as it could as far as my scores go. Oh, and while I don't count it there is a moment in the Korosensei spin-off based on video games where Nagisa is affected by his bug, or a personal ability, and becomes super strong. Definitely not something I'm attracted to, but I found it funny that his head is still the same size xD.
Grade: C

Breasts: Like most traps Nagisa is flat here. Not much else to say, though I guess I can mention that in the pool episodes he doesn't wear a shirt and doesn't seem to have nipples.
Grade: D

Clothes: I really like the school uniforms in this series, so Nagisa scores quite well here. The uniform consists of a white shirt with either a grey blazer (with the girl's outfits) or a blue button-up vest (the boy's, which is what Nagisa wears), a black necktie, and some sort of bottom. In the boy's uniform, which Nagisa wears a majority of the time, has long grey pants with big pockets on the side and a black belt. It seems he has to hem up the legs though, due to being so short. The summer uniform has short sleeves and seems to lack the tie, sadly enough. I really like this outfit as it makes Nagisa look more like an office worker than a student and that's a cool effect. He does wear a blazer during the school festival, and due to plot reason he also puts on the plaid skirts of the female uniform. Technically this is the second time he crossdresses (and last “official” time), the first being during the summer break where he dresses in an outfit to get through a club. That outfit is sorta gothic or punk-like, having a black shirt that shows shoulders, red bracelets, a red and black skirt, and black thighhighs. I do like this outfit, but I also appreciate the fact that they don't force Nagisa to be a trap in every appearance either (despite Karma's best efforts. Though sadly this also means we don't get to see maid Nagisa or any of the other costumes he bought for Nagisa). In the manga Nagisa wears a fish swimsuit to help a teach a girl to swim, it makes sense in context, but I like how it showed a bit of his midriff. In the proper pool episode he wears trunks like the other boys. His casual outfit seems to consist of a jacket, a tank top, and jeans which works well for him (especially when he sheds the jacket when he gets really serious). There's also the battle outfits, which consists of a sorta-bulky military quality jacket, a black bodysuit, matching pants, and black boots. The color of that outfit changes to match his surroundings as camouflage. Finally, while he didn't technically wear it his mother did hold up a pink dress in the mirror for him. Overall I really like Nagisa's uniform, but while he does have a lot of variety it's nothing that appeals to me that strongly. Oh, and in the spin-off he apparently gets forced into a frilly bikini and charms the class, but that's overly pandering so I'd like to strike that from being official.
Grade: B

Personality: Nagisa is a pretty interesting guy. He is similar to a lot of traps, being shy and feminine, but that's more because of his self-depreciating personality than just being made to be “cute”. He's timid and cautious, but he also can keep a clear mind. He can hide his bloodlust in such a way that he can casually walk up to someone before attacking, meaning he has a real talent for assassination. He even uses several moves from other assassins, and his “victims” compare him to a serpent in the way he can glare and nearly crush someone even before making a move. I really like this serious side of him as it shows he's not a standard character. Incidentally he's also the fifth best marksman in the class among the boys. Fortunately he uses this talent to become a teacher, and is able to easily calm the delinquents using his skills. As far as school work goes, Nagisa is technically in class E, only doing well at English in the beginning but eventually becomes one of the top 50 students in the school.
That said, a lot of Nagisa's personality is because of his mother. He lives alone with her, though it seems that near the end of the series his father seems to have returned to help patch things up. However, this is not a good thing as Nagisa's mother seems to abuse him. At one point she even slammed his face repeatably against a table, and that's not counting all the verbal abuse either. It turns out that her parents wanted her to focus on studying and never allowed her to be a “girl” so she wanted a daughter to raise properly. However, instead she got Nagisa, a son, so she decided to raise him as a girl. This included forcing him to keep his hair long, dictating his life goals and education, and even forced him to crossdress. It seems that her favorite phrase to him is “I actually wanted a girl”, which really bothers Nagisa. Luckily, after seeing Nagisa protect her from an assassin his mother decided to hold back a bit. She shows not one, but two sort of redemption which is nice, and Nagisa helps her around the house more after that too. I bring up his history as it does well to show how his personality formed; his shyness is a result of not wanting to anger his mother while his observation skills are also developed as he tries to keep her from blowing up too badly. I liked looking at his past as it shows that he's more than just some fanservice trap character.
Nagisa is voiced by Nao Touyama in the OVA and by Mai Fuchigami in the proper series. Being more familiar with Mai's voice I'll say that it's a great one. She really gets his bloodlust when needed and meekness otherwise. I think that this is her first shota role, as she's more famous for Iona from Arpeggio, Alice from DokiDoki Precure, or Miho from Girls und Panzer, but she does have a great voice. Overall Nagisa is a great character, and the only problem is that we don't get to know his past for quite some time. Before that, and before he shows his true assassin qualities, he seems more basic sadly enough.
Grade: A-

Libido: Nagisa is likely the least perverse male in the series, at least as far as the students and Korosensei go. He seemed to mostly stay out of the tank activity, where the other boys were helping Iona with a remote control tank to look up girls' skirts. That said, there are a lot of characters who like Nagisa, so he does have a lot to discuss. First off is, well, pardon my language but there's a teacher called “Bitch-sensei” (her name is “Jelavić” but apparently Japanese pronounces Vs like Bs so she gained that nickname). Anyway, when she found out that Nagisa had information on Korosensei's weaknesses she decided to try and seduce him. This included marshmallowing and using her famed “30 hit kiss of death”, but outside of her introduction she eventually fell more for the other teacher Karasuma. He also managed to seduce a rich guy while in drag, which proved useful for another plot though Nagisa is less than thrilled at this. There's also Sakura, the rough girl from the cram school that Nagisa tutors after helping out her school. She also encouraged him to become a teacher, which is indeed what Nagisa became. There is a fair amount of years, and Sakura is fairly young for a serious relationship, they share one that's more based on respect than anything else.
There's a fair share of characters in class 3-E that seem to like Nagisa. I suppose that I should mention that Korosensei and Nagisa, being the two “faces” of the series, occasionally get paired but I'd like to bury that as I really don't approve of such things. There's also Karma, who seems to be another famous pairing for him. It's helped that Karma (along with Rio, a female student) is the main one that tries to get Nagisa to crossdress. He's also Nagisa's main rival, and they are also childhood friends. I suppose that yaoi pairings are famous among Shounen series, but considering that both seem to show more interest in girls means that I don't see how this got so popular. Karma even likes a meganekko! And yet this pairing gets more doujins than any other, grumble grumble. Anyway, we've come to Nagisa's most important relationship. Kaede Kayano, most often called “Kayano”, is the official female lead of the series. As a result, Nagisa and her should be paired up which is exactly what happens. And I approve too. Now, this isn't just pairing the two leads, the two do share a lot of moments together. They even look a little alike, both having non-standard hair colors and similar styles (though Kaede seems to dye hers). Nagisa even gave her a 15-hit kiss to keep her still, probably the only moment we have of him showing a bit of perversion. Which is a shame as I would have liked to see him do a bit more, like hug Kaede and compliment her beautiful flat chest (the poor girl needs it after all the insults she gets). Sadly the lack of perversion is what does Nagisa in here, though to be fair it's not like I expect him to be like Korosensei either.
Grade: C

Age: Nagisa is in his third year of middle school, making him about to graduate and a bit better than the standard middle school student. His birthday is also July 20th. We also see him after a time skip in the epilogue and it doesn't look like he has changed a bit.
Grade: C+

Total Grades: 57
Average score: 6.3
Final Grade: C+

And that's the blog for this week.

: Not too bad, I suppose. There were some weak points, but I'm sure that I can smooth them out before graduation.

Don't worry, I still really like you!

: I'm not sure if that's supposed to comfort me or creep me out.

It's supposed to be relieving...

*Topaz looks depressed.*

: Ah, er... Th-thank you, I guess. But I really have to get back or I'll never be able to save Korosensei.

: Do not worry, Nagisa. I'm right here.

*Unknown to both Topaz and Nagisa Korosensei has been spying behind them. The two are taken aback, while he is eating a cream puff.*

: Delicious. Your local cuisine is sweet and tasty, just how I like it.

: When did you get here!

More importantly, where did you get that cream puff?

: I've been here since Libido. Nothing more than a brisk walk from my location, so I decided to stop off for a bite. But now that I'm here that means that you may put your blade away, Nagisa. You do not need to fight.

: I'm mostly glad to see you again.

*Nagisa attempts to hug Korosensei, but the tentacled teacher backs away as he notices an anti-sensei knife in his student's hand.*

: Of course, you can always fight me.

So how did you escape?

: Nurufufufu~ you'll never know!

I assume that it has something to do with a horse or something. You have a big hoof mark on your face!

: What? No I - *Takes out a mirror and looks at himself* KYAAAA!

*Korosensei over panics in a comedic fashion, but soon brushes himself off and calmly takes a breath.*

: Ahem. Anyway, as an apology for my student distracting you from your work allow me to take it upon myself. I shall help you in whatever way you require. But, like all good teachers, I'll only aid you when you least expect it...

That sounds like foreshadowing!

: That would be giving Korosensei far too much thought...

True that. But it seems that our time is up for this week's blog.

: True, we should be getting back. How about a lift, Korosensei?

: With honor!

*Korosensei wraps Nagisa in his tentacles and flies off. As Topaz watches, another figure comes up behind him.*

: Seems like your trap blog is done.

That it is. So what made you come back so early?

: OH! I found out that you finally made enough money to pay off you loans. You're off the hook!

HUZZAH! It's been a fun trip, but now I have to collect my goods and then we can return home!

: I just hope it won't take a week or something...

It might, I have a LOT of junk.

*Ririchiyo sighs.*

: I suppose that we'll be at this school next week then.

I know. But who knows what kind of girl we'll see!

Posted by emperortopaz | Apr 7, 8:45 AM | 0 comments
March 31st, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-eighty-third week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*Topaz and Ririchiyo are organizing books at the school library.*

: Psst, Topaz. The blog has begun.

Curses! I can't let this opportunity pass me by!

*A pink-haired girl with pink dual chocolate cornet hair comes up.*

: Shhh, don't you know that this is a library?

Er, my mistake. *continues but is quieter* If you're just joining us, I'd say go back and read previous blogs.

: Right, get Topaz's view ratings up. He needs all the confidence he can get.

I'm not that desperate. But in all fairness, what with my insurance causing me to get a bunch of odd jobs at Endless Cross School which I've been doing for some time and the recent attacks by Melona using magical girl creatures this has been a busy year and I have no idea how I'd summarize everything.

: You just did.

Hmmm? Really?

: I don't know. I'm an idiot who only knows fairy tales. Tee hee. But speaking of that, how about we get into costumes. Here I'll change your assistant.

: What theee heeeeeeccckkk!

*Miyuki spins Riri around, putting her in a cosplay of a certain fairy tale hero who was born in a peach.*

Looks great!

*Riri flusters from the short skirt, specifically the back.*

: I don't agree, this is really embarrassing! Look at how exposed my behind is!

With pleasure!

*The camera close-ups on Riri's soft and plump butt. However, she smacks Topaz upside the head.*

: I didn't mean that literally! Besides, it's like my "peach" is about to pop out! And I don't mean my chest as that would be dumb!

Of course. After all, if your chest was any type of food it would be a pancake!

*Ririchiyo grabs his collar and smacks Topaz repeatably.*

I meant that in the best way!

: Sure you did.

: Never mind her Momentaro cosplay, look at mine!

*Topaz is surprised by Miyuki's name mistake as it stands out from her love of fairy tales. But he shrugs it off as the middle schooler spins around in her gown.*

: Looks lovely!

Wrong series, but right color at least.

: Of course, Sinderella is one of the best fairy tales!

Hmmm? And what are those copper-like shoes for?

: Oh? Those are my BRASS slippers. Like in the story! Though I have to hurry or I'll transform back at the strike of noon!

*Topaz whispers to Ririchiyo.*

Hey, is Miyuki acting funny to you?

: *also whispering* Maybe she thinks that all these stories are copyrighted or something.

Better than changing them for no good reason through localization, but that's a dumb idea.

: Hey, what are you two blabbing about over there?


: Topaz was wondering if you had a costume for you.

: Of course! Here, have a costume of the guy I have a crush on!

*Miyuki hands Topaz an outfit.*

Hey, this isn't Peter Pan!

: Oh, er, I changed it. Yeah. Now it's Aladdin, so go change.

Alright then, if you excuse me I'll change in this supply closet.

*He goes to open the nearby door, but Miyuki stops him.*

: N-no, how about you go into the bathroom. No reason to change in this dingy and dank closet.

Oh yeah, perhaps you can explain THIS!

*Topaz opens the door. Comically several mops hit him in the face.*

: To be fair she did warn you...

Don't worry, I have a hard head!


No time, take a look at this!

*Topaz points into the room and the real Miyuki is all tied up.*

: Wait, if that's Miyuki, but Miyuki is out here...

Obviously this one is a fake! No wonder she got the fairy tales all wrong!

: Mwahaha, I knew that impersonating the blogged girl would get me closer. But no need for this flimsy disguise any longer!

*The false Miyuki disolves into slime and returns to being Melona. Meanwhile Topaz and Ririchiyo untie the true one.*

: How dare you tie me up and toss me in a closet, steal my identity, and, most importantly, get a lot of fairy tales wrong! I'll teach you a lesson!

: Oh, and I allow you to blog about me. I don't know what it is, but the other girls have said that it's given them more power. It looks like I might need it, too.

: Such haste to battle. But I'm not one to turn down a fight either. Come forth, enemy!

*Melona uses one of the shoes she had been wearing prior to create a creature.*


Careful Miyuki! If that creature is as strong as it smells you'll be in for a tough battle!

: Ufufu, I take that as a compliment!

: Just get on with the blog, Topaz.

Great plan, and as she already allowed it...

Today's girl is:

Miyuki Hoshizora
Smile Precure!

Hair: Miyuki probably has my least favorite hair of all the Smile girls. However, that's only because all the girls have wonderful hairstyles. Even Miyuki. While not really a style I prefer, I do like the uniqueness of her chocolate cornet-like drills. She has one on each side of her head, similar to where buns might be and they're held up by cute yellow ribbons. Technically her hair IS pink, a color I don't usually enjoy, but the fact that it's dark pink over a lighter shade makes me enjoy it a bit more. Unfortunately while her hair is up her ears can be seen, though she does have nice framing sides. Her bangs aren't anything special, but to describe them she has a lot of shorter strands (three on each side) with a large middle bang. Her hair is up most of the time too, which also makes her hair seem shorter than it really is. Oh, and she also has an ahoge on the upper-right side of her head.
Cure Happy sadly has a lighter pink color to her hair, but it's still within a somewhat likable shade. The shading certainly helps too. Like the other Smile girls she gains a tiara with wings in her transformation. Cure Happy also has much longer hair as her twintails go all the way down to her knees (possibly longer, they do curl up slightly at the tips). She also has two strands sticking out of her main twintails as well as two ahoge on her head, one on each side. I like how her cornets in her civilian form transform into the bases of her twintails, it's a cool effect and I like how it creates a layered-look to her twintails. I would say that it might have been nice had they gotten bows or ribbons, but that might be too busy as well. As Princess Happy her hair gets slightly longer, with her twintails gaining more “bumps” to them. Her ahoges also become more curved. Overall she has a great look, and while not one of my favorite Pink Cures I can appreciate that at the very least she didn't randomly get blonde hair or something. Also as Cure Ultra Happy her hair becomes EXTREMELY long, easily going past her feet. She also has two backwards-facing wings above her ears.
Grade: B

Eyes: Sadly Miyuki's eyes are not as forgivable as her hair is. While they are the same color as her hair, darker pink in normal form and lighter as Cure Happy, I tend to judge eyes a bit more. Her eyes being tarame isn't the best, though it does fit her personality. She also has a lot of expression, and in general Smile's art style is really great. She does seem to have a lot of eyelashes as well.
Grade: C+

Face: Like the other Smile girls Miyuki shares the excellent art style. It's a very soft style that I enjoy, and Miyuki herself has a nice, gentle smile which she often has. She does have a slim nose, but like the others it isn't often noticeable. As said before, her face is well-framed. In addition, she has several silly faces that have become memetic. These include one where she has an extremely wide-looking face and another where she's smiling despite all the trouble her poor luck has caused her. I also can't forget that Miyuki's face seems to attract flying objects, which is the way she's introduced to Candy and Pop, the two fairies of the series.
Grade: A

Build: Miyuki is pretty much similar to the other girls. She has an average teenage girl body, without many curves. Nothing wrong with that, of course, but it doesn't score well for me. Instead, I will mention that perhaps Miyuki will “grow into” a nice body. I'm saying this as her mother Ikuyo is curvy and is possibly the most popular PreCure mother in the franchise. Okay, so I didn't figure that into Miyuki's score, but I wanted to mention it. I'll also say that, like the other girls Miyuki has various transformations due to Majorina's inventions. These include becoming invisible, shrinking down, becoming younger, a mind switch with Candy (which lead to Cure Candy, which is the biggest waste of a good name ever) and even becoming a giant mecha! Said mecha is called the Happy Robo and I liked that episode xD. Likewise Miyuki was transformed into a fairy when they visited Märchenland.
Grade: C

Breasts: Likewise Miyuki isn't too different from the other cures, but like her body she may become like her mother. Again that's not taken into account.
Grade: D

: You need to stop talking about Miyuki's mother!

But she's one of my favorites! Of the non-glasses wearing variety, but still!

: That's just because you're a pervert! At least mention something for Zettai.

You mean like having her fat butt break through her jeans?

: Precisely! Now get back to the blog!

Clothes: Miyuki is usually seen in her school uniform. As with the others this consists of a blue skirt with white shirt, not-quite knee-high socks, and a neck tie matching her color (this being pink, which is also what the non-Cure students also have). Her casual outfit is better, with thighhighs and a layered ruffled skirt, and a pink long-sleeved shirt with vest over it. Again Smile gives the girls a theme color and sticks with it, meaning that Miyuki often wears pink. Of course, we can't forget about Miyuki's bonus costumes! After all, during the fairy tale fashion show she wore a pink Cinderella dress. Then later on she also wears a... Cinderella dress, during the Cinderella episode. But in the movie-she is also Cinderella. Somehow I think that Miyuki has a theme going, and while I respect her dedication the lack of variety does hurt her. That said the movie also has her in the non-magical Cinderella outfit where she's a servant, and I like Miyuki's cute bear patch on her apron. She also dressed in a flowery pink kimono for the theater village episode.
Cure Happy's outfit is similar to the other cures. It consists of a short skirt with spats sticking out of the bottom, a top that covers the skirt slightly and has frilly shoulders, and a ribbon on the chest. She also has gauntlets and almost knee-high boots. Color wise Cure Happy is a mix of white and pink (with white being similar to the other cures). Like the others she also gains a wedding dress-like frilly outfit above her ordinary Cure outfit in Princess form. But, sadly Cure Happy also has an exclusive power-up in the movie (well, it helps her as far as variety is concerned, but this is around when that started to be a common occurrence). As Cure Ultra Happy she looks mostly like her Princess form (with a whiter shade of outfit), but she gains a long flowing feather-like cloak and she sprouts a huge pair of wings on her back.
Grade: B

Personality: Miyuki is a bright and energetic girl that really likes fairy tales. Fortunately she isn't as obsessed as a certain Princess Precure, but she does have a few character episodes based on that. Also, in a bit of a twist in the past Miyuki was shy and had a hard time making friends. This changed when her grandmother gives her a mirror and a meeting with a mysterious girl made Miyuki a lot more open about herself. She's also very happy and optimistic, often using her phrase “Ultra Happy” to describe her happiness level. She also has a silly “happu-ppu” or something similar word that she says when things don't go her way, usually with puckered lips. She also thinks that keeping a smile is important to retain happiness Miyuki is also a dojikko, but fortunately it doesn't mean that's her only character trait either. Plus it's mainly done for comedy and she doesn't get hurt from it. She can get over-excited, but her enthusiasm is the reason that she's accepted as the “leader” of the group. Well, that, she's pink, and she's also the first member, but still. She is also the worst student of the bunch, which says something about her as other than Reika the girls aren't exactly geniuses. She's certainly not like a certain other “pink Miyuki” xD. Miyuki is a likeable girl, I agree, but she is probably my least favorite Smile Cure. Nothing that's her fault, of course, it's just that the other girls are really appealing personality-wise and Miyuki doesn't fit with their high standards. She's still great though, and I like how Cure Happy uses the power of “heart” almost in a Kamehameha fashion. Miyuki is voiced by Misato Fukuen who does a great voice for her. She's also known for girls like Yoshika from Strike Witches or Yami from TLR, and while not as great as the latter's portrayal (I like KDEG voices) she still portrayed Miyuki's optimism well.
Speaking of voices, in Glitter Force Miyuki-er, “Emily” for some dumb reason-is voiced by Laura Bailey. You might recognize her from anything, really. Anime-wise she voiced Kid Trunks, Evangeline from Negima, and Rise from Persona 4. She also did the voice for Lucina, and while I do like her voice it's also really over exposed. Getting back to Glitter Force they change Cure Happy into Glitter Lucky, even though she keeps the idea of being optimistic and “Ultra Happy” was already in English. I think that they did this just for the joke in the bad luck episode so she could call herself Glitter “unlucky”. Other problems with the dub include “Emily” having a dream in the beginning of the series that foreshadows their Princess forms, by actually SHOWING them, yet she doesn't realize that the girls around her are the other teammates. In Saban's defense I think that the Tokyo Mew Mew 4k!ds dub did a similar thing, but comparing it to something done by 4k!ds should show you how awful this plan was.
Grade: B

Libido: Miyuki actually has a crush that she admits during the girls' slumber party! That said, it's only the fictional Peter Pan so this really doesn't help her libido too much. Sadly Miyuki herself doesn't seem to have much otherwise. I think that she's mostly put with either Akane or the girl from her past (being either Nico from the movie or another girl that I can't remember the name of). Candy or Pop also have their share of supporters, but I don't think Miyuki is paired up with either too much. Probably the only big thing is that Miyuki supports Akane in her pursuit of Brian.
Grade: C

Age: Miyuki is fourteen, like all the other Smile Cures. Not much to say here that I haven't said in previous blogs.
Grade: C

Total Grades: 58
Average score: 6.4
Final Grade: C+

And that's the blog of the week!

: It's unfortunate, but not surprising, that I'm the lowest of my group.

: Topaz prefers Blues, Greens, and Purples over the more feminine colors.

...Isn't "Purple" kinda a feminine color?

: That's not important.

: Right! What is important is that thanks to Topaz's blog I have enough power to defeat this creature!

: Acan?!

: Hey! You didn't even throw a punch or anything!

: Blame the bored writers! Besides, a creature as easy as this isn't worth my time!

: Oh no, I better escape.

*Melona runs towards one of the exits, but is blocked by another Cure.*

: Haven't ya realized by now that ya underestimated us?

: I don't think so, you bunch of school children!

*Melona runs towards another exit, only to be blocked again.*

: We m-may just be school children, but we can deal with a monster like you!

: You girls don't know what you're getting into...

*She runs off again, with similar results.*

: I think that it is YOU who doesn't know the true power we have!

: Yeah, sure. Whatever.

*She attempts to use the last exit, but the final Cure stops her.*

: You may have fought usfc using your magic, but it's time for us to battle your own person!

: Well then, come and get me!

*Melona runs to the center of the library, a circular area with a mural ceiling. The five cures all run towards her, soon folllowed by Topaz and Riri.*

: Your month of terror ends here!

: To be fair the month would end here anyway, but my terror shall reign!

*Melona hits a hidden switch, causing a deep smoke to appear around the Cures.*

What's this?!

: It seems like a crystalizing gas, much like what Aldra filled the Colosseum with a while back!


*But it was too late, the five girls being crystalized in place.*

: OH NO! What can we do!

: Don't worry. We can play a game if you wish, but you have to bet your blog!

I accept!

: Wait! You don't even know what game she wants to play!

It doesn't matter. All that matters is that I save the girls!

: Such just determination, too bad it's wasted on a PERVERT like you!

*Melona hits a switch, and the area moves upward like an elevator. The ceiling even opens up, revealing a large arena.*

: We'll be using these Pokémon things!

But I don't have any!

: Hmmm? I'm pretty sure that I see a few...

*Melona hits another button. The five Cures then get a Pokéball come out of their chests, in the spiritual non-violent way. The balls then float over to Topaz.*


: This seems like a huge set up. No wonder Miyuki's battle was such a joke!

: That's right! Now, send out your first Pokémon!

Alright, here I go!

*Topaz choses the Cure Sunny ball first, and a monkey-like Pokémon appears.*

: Inf'rnape!

Well, at least this one is really useable!

: Well, since you used a Fire-type I'll chose this Water-type!

*Melona sends out her first ball, revealing a shark.*


: Doesn't she realize...

Shhhh, don't help her... Alright, do your standard first turn thing!

: Don't let that Fake Out hit you! Protect!

*Sharpedo raises a shield of energy, protecting it from harm. However, rather than clapping Infernape throws a bunch of rocks around. They don't actually hit the Sharpedo at all.*

: Really?! Those annoying rocks ALREADY?!

: YEAH! I'd rather have your monkey fling poo at me!

You'd like that too much. Mulch has a low base power and I'd have to go without an item afterward!

: Err, what?


*Melona's Sharpedo seems faster.*

: Perfect! Now, do your one thing!

*Melona's Sharpedo becomes much bigger.*


: Oh no! Now it'll defeat you in one hit!

: That's right, now use Waterfall!

*Mega Sharpedo shoots like a torpedo towards Topaz's Infernape. After reaching it it creates a geyser of water and rides it upward. Infernape takes heavy damage, but a small piece of ribbon falls off.*


Uhfufufu. You should know...

*Infernape leaps upward and creates a large glowing ball of energy.*

-the spirit of Kansai does not go down that easily! NOW, FOCUS BLAST!

: APE!

*Infernape slams the ball of energy down, smashing it into the Mega Sharpedo and destroying it in one hit.*

: Great job! But why didn't you just use Close Combat?

But this looked a lot cooler and fitting for Cure Sunny.

: Your showmanship will get the better of you someday...

: That was merely a warm up, to get your guard down. Beware 'cause here comes the heavy hitter!

*Melona throws a ball, and out comes a shining purple killer whale. It then changes form into a black version.*

Oh no! Shiny Primal Kyogre!


: Sadly Topaz is lazy and thus that's just the regular version!

Nothing wrong with being lazy! Though it does mean that Slaking isn't as useful as it could be.

*Primal Kyogre's ability makes it downpour.*

Now my fire attacks are nullified!

: Not that it matters much. I mean, who would use fire-type attacks against a WATER-type?

: That's right, now use your strongest attack-

WAIT! Infernape, return!

*Topaz recalls his Infernape and sends out his next Pokémon.*

: Nothing you could possibly have could withstand my Primal Kyogre's Water Spout!

*Primal Kyogre uses a powerful Water attack, flooding the entire area.*

Oh no! Hopefully the books downstairs aren't wrecked!

: In all fairness I think that Pokémon battles are like magical girls and the surroundings don't stay wrecked. And don't mention the Black White intro either.

*The water subsides, with Melona gloating.*

: MWAHAHA! Looks like my powerful water attacks easily destroyed your...



*Topaz sent out Peace's equivalent, a Heliolisk. Its dry skin absorbed the power of the water attack.*

: WHAT THE?! That's unfair!

Nonsense, now to use your own weather against you. Heliolisk, use THUNDER!


*A bolt of lightning strikes Kyogre from the heavens. It barely survives with 3 HP. Heliolisk also loses HP due to the Life Orb item.*

: Mwahaha. That's what you get for using INFERIOR Pokémon! Kyogre, use your improved attack to deal super effective damage!

*Kyogre uses Earthquake, dropping Heliolisk down to 2 HP. However, at the end of the turn the rain restores some of Heliolisk's health.*

You may have thought that you had this one, but do the same!

: You fool! Lightning never strikes the same place twice!

In the rain it does!

*Heliolisk uses thunder once more, defeating the Primal Kyogre. The skies become clear, and Topaz's Pokémon loses HP again.*

: Fine then, if your stupid lizard is healed by the rain let's see what he does when it becomes sunny!

*Melona throws her third ball. Out comes a brick goliath, though it quickly becomes glowing with lava energy.*

: Of course she'd use Primal Groudon too...

I can't keep an Electric type out against that, better trade!

*Topaz calls back his Pokémon, sending out the next.*

: Before it materializes use your special move!


*Groudon summons a ton of rock spires from the ground. However, they seem to all go underneath Topaz's flying Pokémon. It looks like a dragonfly, sorta.*


: Flygon for March? That's dumb. Couldn't you pick that one fighting bird, at least that could kick and use wind powers...

I imagine the forces that be wanted me to use a Pokémon from each generation. At least it's not weak to fire like the banana tree dinosaur.

: Ufufufu. Do you really think that a weakling like that can take down my Primal Groudon?

: ON!

: Your Earthquakes will just bounce off, but try your best!

True, better use a special attack. Flygon, use Earth Power!

: FLY!

*A great earth shaking occurs under Primal Groudon, defeating it in a single hit. Flygon takes some damage from Life Orb.*

: WHAT THE?! Why are these Pokémon Aldra lent me so weak?!

Oh, so you're working for Aldra then. I wonder what she has against me.

: It's not important, as once I win you'll be sent to the Shadow Realm!

: Great, is 4k!ds dubbing us now?

Sadly I think Saban made the Glitter Force enemies from the same place.

: When will bad dubs end!

No clue...

: Enough discussing such idiotic things. Go forth, Latias!

*Melona sends out a red dragon-like creature. However, it quickly turns into a purple version of itself.*

: LAT!


: Ufufufu. What could possibly be wrong?

You can't use more than one mega in a battle!

: It's alright, I'm evil. I break rules all the time.

: Hm, she's got a point. At least the villainous teams never think like that.

I'd better prepare for such cheating by switching out!

*Topaz returns his Pokémon and sends out a blue icy bird with a flowing tail.*

: UNO!

: This is more like what I was expecting. Not sure why this bird speaks Spanish though.

Obviously it only has one card in their hand.

: You fool! In the time that you switched out my Latias used Calm Mind.


*It indeed looks smarter.*

: Oh no! That Lat- wait, is that Mega Latios or Latias? I'm always confused.

I think it depends on eye color, but I agree that Gamefreak was lazy. But no matter, I'll make your buffs useless!

: HA! Articuno can't use Haze so I have no idea what you're talking about. Latias, use Calm Mind again!


*It becomes twice as smart as it was originally.*

Don't let that stop you, use Mind Reader!


*Articuno concentrates really hard. Like, REALLY hard.*

: If you think that will make Blizzard or something hit better you're wasting your time. Latias is fully buffed and able to used Stored Power!

: Lat!

*Latias shoots a purple laser at Articuno, dealing 159 damage out of its 192 HP.*

: Oh no! What's your plan now?

*Topaz points at the Latias with an intimidating grin.*

...Sheer Cold.


*Latias gets encased in a block of ice and faints.*

: NO! I was ready to sweep and everything!

: And I thought your showmanship would be the death of you. Here you are up without a single loss!

Of course, because the power of magical girls is impossible to overcome.

: F-fine then... But I must say... The next one is the strongest I could possibly bring.... Go forth, RAYQUAZA!

: Oh no... That means...

*Melona sends out a green serpentine dragon, but it quickly mega-evolves. The air around them become windy.*


: Quick, switch out! Mega Rayquaza isn't worth losing anything to!

Switch out, even though I have the advantage? Besides, what could she possibly do-


*Mega Rayquaza dive bombs Articuno from space, easily causing it to faint.*

Don't worry, I still have THIS!

*Topaz sends out a pink goofy-looking Pokémon.*

: Dino!

: Really? Why are you using such a terrible Pokémon?

I dunno.

: Audino!


: HA HA HA! If this is the best you can do, I've got this match won already! Draco Meteor!


*Mega Rayquaza summons a giant draconic meteor and fires it at Audino. It crashes into the ground.*

: I can't look!

It's better than you expect...

: Ehhh?

*Underneath the giant meteor, easily holding it at bay is Audino. However it seems to have changed form into a more white version of itself. Using just one finger it destroys the gigantic meteor. Both Melona and Mega Rayquaza are shocked.*


Fufufu. Did you forget about Miyuki's love of FAIRY tales? And how FAIRY-types are immune to Dragons?

: That's a stupid thing!

Oh well. Use Dazzling Gleam, Audino!


*Audino shoots a lot of fairy powder at Rayquaza. It doesn't take it well, fainting from it.*

: HEY! That shouldn't do that much damage!

You forget that Dragon Ascent cut your defenses down, allowing me to defeat your beast in a single attack!

: Also Stealth Rock is annoying.

: Grrr. That's it, time to bring out the big guns!

: Wait, Rayquaza wasn't the big guns?

You have nothing left. This was a 5v5, after all.

: You fool! You only thought that because there are five Cures, but I have another one!

But I only have five.

: Don't worry, I'll find one.

*Riri looks in a convenient and large treasure chest. She doesn't notices how great her butt looks.*

Nice Peach, but we're looking for Smile Precure characters.

: *flustered* Just get your head back in the battle!

*Melona throws out a Pokéball, releasing a green genetically modified Pokémon that somehow has its own shiny form. It then becomes bulkier, with a pointed brow.*


: Just Super!

At least he isn't Golden. But you can take this, Audino!

: Aud!

: I wouldn't be so sure, POISON JAB!

*The Mega Mewtwo X punches with a poisonous fist. Fortunately it only deals about 44% of Mega Audino's health.*

: Darn it, that things bulkier than I expected!

I told you before, don't underestimate the power of Fairy tales! Dazzling Gleam!

*Mega Audino does the same thing as before, dealing almost half of Mega Mewtwo X's HP in a single hit. It now hangs at 68 HP out of 181.*

: I just have to believe in my last chance! Poison Jab again!

: MEW!

*Mega Mewtwo X punches again, but gets a lucky crit and knocks out Mega Audino.*

No! Now my Happiness is gone!

: Mwahaha! Send out the next one...

*Topaz reluctantly sends out his Pokémon, but as Mega Mewtwo X outspeeds them they get defeated one by one in a still montage. After Infernape faints Topaz drops to his knees.*

: I told you that I'd come back! Now, you'd better get a Pokémon in the next sixty seconds or I'll call this a forfeit. One... Two...

*Ririchiyo runs back, a Pokéball in her hand.*

: Fifteen... Sixteen... Twenty...

: This was the best I could find!

Good enough. I have a strong feeling about it!

: Forty-five... Forty-six...

*Topaz sends out his last Pokémon, a late-entry teddy bear.*

: Ursa!


: Hey, it's the closest I could find to that Cure Candy or whatever!

Meh, good enough.

: I've got this one easy. Take down that pathetic bear, Mega Mewtwo X!

*Mega Mewtwo X uses a Draining Punch on the Teddiursa, hitting it directly.*

: OH NO!

*However, Topaz is grinning. A familiar piece of cloth falls off the Teddiursa, who also has a evil grin.*


*Teddiursa's eyes star up and it grabs Mega Mewtwo X's hand. It then flips it over, causing the mega legendary to faint on the ground in a crater.*

I think that is my win!

: No fair! You cheated and used multiples of the same item!

You used more than one Mega Pokémon.

: FINE! Take your dumb cures! Like I care!

*Melona frees the girls and makes her escape. The Cures are unconscious, but breathing.*

Well, at least they're free now.

: If only we could free the girls that got stuck in other places. Like the Colosseum last year.

Something tells me that this isn't the last we've seen of Melona and the others...

: Maybe we'll look at another series finally.

Well, next week IS the trap month. And I have a KILLER idea...

: That's a terrible joke.

Posted by emperortopaz | Mar 31, 8:42 AM | 0 comments
March 24th, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-eighty-second week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*We join this week's blog with Topaz and Riri setting up board game tables.*

Welcome back everyone. As you can see, we're hard at work setting up seats for the family game night at Endless Cross School.

: I thought we were just helping out the student council. How did we get roped into this?

It's a long story...

==Flashback music==

*Topaz sits on a chair, being part of a circle with many other girls.*

Can I go yet?

: NOT YET! We still have many important school duties to assign! Endless Cross School Student Council Rule #21, no one may leave the meeting until all the business has been taken care of. Now, what were we discussing?

: More money for the tank club!

: That's what you always say!

: And we could always use more money. Those treads are expensive, and that's not counting all the maintenance that's needed.

: I think that we were talking about the "aid Zettai foundation". Though I do not understand why we have such a thing.

: It's to aid in his depression by giving him a lot of service. And don't worry, I know a great way to tease him. I even have my backless butterfly panties all ready...

: Are they anything like the snowflake panties this nice helper gave me?

*She points to Topaz.*

W-well, I figure that she's a lot like Miyuki so I should give them similar gifts.

: You pamper him too much...

He is my only reader, and I want him to feel great all the time!

: Commendable, but please refrain from such dirty things. Or at least do it in a secure location!

: I did try to teach Zettai a lesson in the toilets, but it was too much and I blew the door off. He fainted as well.

I imagine he had a huge smile on his face at the time...

: Enough about toilets! Unless that's why you want to leave, Topaz-senpai.

That's not it.

: You do not need to explain. I imagine that being surrounded by beauties such as us has made your ********* become *******.

*Shino uses her pinky to explain further.*

No no no! That's not the reason at all!

: Your modesty is commendable, but do not be frightened if your ********* needs to *******.

Language! Also I think you're using far too many stars per word!

: Yeah, at least say he's waxing his tank cannon or something.


: While Zettai would prefer me, I think that Topaz here would probably prefer the council president with the "convenient window" for him...

In my defense Zettai would probably love to be sat on by her as well.

: Such perversion... But sitting on Zettai sounds sexy. I would even call him a dog or p-pig or something.

: Ahem~ Getting back to the next subject. *Stands up with a box of papers.* Now, we'll see which one of us is going to host the family game night this week using this raffle.

*She walks over to Topaz, but a piece of paper falls out of her coat pocket.*

Oh hey, you dropped this.

*He picks it up and it has "winner" on it.*

: Congratulations, Topaz-senpai. Seems you'll be hosting.

This seems like a trick.

: Don't worry, I'm sure that she did that just because you haven't been signing up for anything.


*Topaz sighs.*


==Resuming present==

And that's what happened.

: I agree that sounded rigged. But at least we're not the only ones here.

*A blue girl emerges.*

: Everything going alright?

: It's boring, but it looks like we have everything set up. Though I do wonder why all those mirrors are on the table over there.

Obviously they're so that the young heroes can reflect sunlight into the sun-faces.

: Talking about video games again? At least this time it's an N64 game...

Or 3DS!

: I'm not sure what all this about video games is about, but it sounds like some fun. And the mirrors were set out for prizes.

: Cool. Good thing that question didn't go unanswered.

: And I see that everything is set out properly... *inspects around.* Great then, that means that we can open the doors.

*She goes over to the doors. However, right as she's about to open them a boisterous man barges in, knocking Reika on her butt. Luckily her plump cheeks absorb the impact, though sadly Zettai's face isn't there to catch her.*

: WRRRYYYYYY... Am I at such a silly place?

: I'm not sure, but it seems you're rude!

*Topaz helps Reika up, brushing off her bottom as he does so.*

Yeah! And it doesn't look like you're very family-friendly either.

: Indeed. This is a function for students and their families only. We must ask you to leave.

: Well well well... Er, I really should have talked more to Masuzu before takingthis disguise.

Disguise? Wait a minute.. Your next line will be some sort of bad Dio meme joke, won't it?

: Bad joke? Of course not! But you thought that I am Dio...

*Dio becomes a puddle and reappears as a familiar villain.*

: But it was I, Melona!... Uh?!

Knew it was someone in disguise.

: That's fortunate. I don't think we could have had a realistic chance against a vampire of that power.

: Hey! Don't forget that I'm still powerful. Especially if I do this- Fiend, come forth!

*Melona uses her magic to bring forth a creature from one of the nearby mirrors.*


: We should have known that those mirrors were suspicious! I never should have mentioned them!

But foreshadowing is important!

: Enough fooling around. This time I mean business!

Oh no, they're going to drop the stock market on our faces!

: Quick, Reika! Use the Accountant attack!

: Eh?

: ...Nevermind, it was a dumb joke.

I liked it!

: Of course you would. You like ALL dumb jokes!

Only the ones that make sense and aren't painfully stupid.

: While you two talk, allow me to transform!

: There, now prepare yourself you fiendish interloper!

Wait, before you get too involved will you allow me to blog about you?

: Of course! And this time you don't need to look for a Toynbee tile to get me to help!

: And Topaz doesn't have to kiss your butt either!

A-are you sure?

*Topaz looks saddened.*

: Of course not, pervert! (Though you could always k-kiss mine-er, what kind of perversion am I envisioning?!)

Sad to say, but that's more Zettai's style anyway. I wouldn't want to take that away from him. Anyway, enough delay as...

Today's girl is:


Reika Aoki
Smile Precure!

Hair: Reika has, in my opinion, the very best hair in Pretty Cure. I don't mean just Smile Precure either, I'm talking about the whole franchise. Her “civilian” mode is absolutely stunning. Her hair is a dark blue and she not only has a great length (going to her mid-back) but she even has a straight and flawless hime cut. Her sides go down to her neck, giving a lot of framing to her face, and are held by small cute clips. This is the perfect kind of hair, and it matches Reika's traditional personality perfectly. If this was the only style Reika had, this would be an easy A+, no doubt. Rather, it's the alternate hairstyles that bring her down. For example, when playing sports or in her Momotarou costume Reika has a ponytail. I don't actually dislike ponytails (just look at Nao's blog last week) but other than keeping it more regulated and not as flowing I don't see the point. Still, this isn't a problem, it's more that her base form is just THAT strong that it's hard to compare!
Speaking of comparing, we can't forget to talk about Cure Beauty. When Reika transforms her hair becomes a lighter shade of blue, and that right there is a bit of a bad thing for me. Luckily she does keep her nice hime cut, though she does have a tiara with wings above her ears. It really reminds me of Umi from Rayearth, have an example image. Her sides are also longer and fuller, with cute golden holders and I really like them. In back Beauty's hair looks like it was cut, again with a straight cut, but it's actually because her hair is layered and she gains four thick segments that reach her knees or so. I wasn't too big on them to begin with, but I do like how they look like icicles which fits well with her ability to control ice. What really hurts is Princess Beauty though. Her sides again become longer, reaching past her stomach. Her tiara also becomes bigger and also gains floating wings, while her hime cut is retained. The worst part of her look is that it seems like the hair around her head randomly explodes into a lion-like wavy pattern. Considering her hair was straight and regal, then when she goes into her princess mode it just looks sloppy as if she didn't brush her hair after getting out of bed. Now, there's nothing wrong with the hair cut, but it looks more like a male's hair style (it would fit in with Saint Seiya, for example). Really, the only problem with Reika's hair is that Princess Beauty's hair is so random that it hurt her chances at a perfect score. If only it wasn't for her pesky transformations she would have done so well! Also it would be great to see a Cure gain a great hime cut after transforming.
Grade: A

Eyes: Reika's eyes are really pretty as well. Like the other Smile girls her eyes match her hair, making them a deep blue normally and lighter when Cure Beauty. I approve of this look, especially Reika's dark blue eyes. Her eyes are also gentle and beautiful, befitting her Cure name. She does have a tarame, like a lot of the other Smile girls, but it's endearing. Reika also has some eyelashes, but they aren't too noticeable in the main series. Overall the only thing that would help would be if she wore glasses.
Grade: B

Face: Reika certainly lives up to her “beauty” title here as well. Like the other Smile girls she looks extremely great, especially for my tastes. She has lovely soft-looking cheeks and, well, not exactly dot-sized but still a fairly small nose which I still like. She also has a great blush, and in general looks absolutely GORGEOUS! I'm not sure what the reason is, but Reika's close ups are some of the best in the Cure series (at least in my opinion) and she looks almost flawless. That said, she also doesn't look too different from the other Smile girls, and it's possible her great hair framing her face and adding a bit of color is leaking into my opinion of her. As a result I won't make her too much better than the other girls.
Grade: A

Build: Reika has a body fitting a middle school girl, like the other girls in Smile PreCure. Nothing wrong with that, but slender girls don't score too well here. It is noted that in an episode she does have a diving buttshot, though sadly it's not as good as it could have been (though I guess I can't be too hard on shows for girls not trying hard for fanservice).
Grade: C

Breasts: Again, like the other girls Reika has a flat chest. Nothing wrong with it, other than not scoring well in my blog. There are certain aspects of this franchise that are much better for Zettai, including this and the previous area.
Grade: D

Clothes: Reika is usually seen in her school uniform. As with the others this consists of a blue skirt with white shirt, white not-quite knee-high socks with a blue stripe, and a neck tie matching her color (this being blue). Reika's colorized customization is that she wears a second shirt over her shirt, it likely has a certain name but not sure how to describe it. The shirt is blue, but not as dark as her skirt or hair. Overall, since I like blue I really like Reika's outfits the best out of the girls. The fact that the light variation and white work well with her dark hair is another bonus. Other casual outfits include a light blue fancy dress with dark blue belt and average-blue jacket, a frilly doll-like dress with a big bow in back which is white with light blue in certain places, and her gym clothes which have red shorts. Speaking of athletics she also wears a standard archer's outfit when performing archery, including the chest piece. She also dresses as Momotaru in the movie (if only she'd show her “peach” instead), Prince Charming in the Cinderella story (which is odd as she's the most feminine character, though I do agree she's the most regal), a lovely kimono in the movie village episode (including the head decorations), and a swimsuit at one point. Overall she has a great amount of variety and much of it fits her noble background.
Beauty's outfit is similar to the other girls, but with a dark blue and light blue mix rather than the girl's color and white. The top looks fancy with the frills as do the skirt, and I like Beauty's arm bands as well. She also wears high boots (though not knee-high) and I will mention that many of Reika's outfits have heels which I'm not too fond of. It's possible that she wears them to make herself taller and be able to look Nao in her eyes, perhaps xD. Anyway, like the others she gains a light-colored wedding dress-like outfit over her Cure outfit when going into Princess mode, and it has a nice big bow in front too. I will say that Beauty's is definitely a very pale shade of blue, as opposed to white. Overall again I really like blue so I approve of the little differences between Beauty and the other Cures.
Grade: B

Personality: Reika is an elegant and quiet, if friendly girl. By “quiet” I don't mean she's a KDEG or something, but that she has a gentle and respectable tone to her voice. Speaking of voice Chinami Nishimura does her voice, and if it wasn't for some other big-names like Marina Inoue in the same series she'd easily be the best. She gives Reika a beautiful voice and has one of the strongest performances in the series. I know I've probably used “beauty” to describe Reika too much at this point, but it's really a great way to describe her various points as she's simply amazing. Anyway Reika is a classic sort of Yamato Nadeshiko, being from a proper and rich Japanese family. She's calm in demeanor and has many noble activities such as being in the archery club or standing as the student council vice president (though she becomes president later in the series). She's also very philosophical and deep-thinking, though she's puzzled by the jokes in the episode where they meet Akane's comedy idols. Still better than being puzzled by the easy questions given to the other cures, and while Reika is the smart one of the team they do both a good and bad job at showing it. The bad is the aforementioned questions, the good is when she's easily able to spot the weaknesses in the enemies with little interaction. She also cares for the flowers around the school, coming in early to do so. There's also a lot of similarities between Reika and Karen from Yes, what with both being smart Blue cures that came last, having noble families and archery attacks, and having similar calm yet popular personalities. The main difference is that Karen, as Cure Aqua, controls water while Reika as Cure Beauty controls ice. Interestingly, but fitting her late entrance (even if it's only the fifth episode), Cure Beauty is probably the strongest of the Smile PreCures. I don't mean in pure brute strength, but a lot of times Reika faces down Joker alone, and Joker is basically the second in command after the sealed big bad. Oh, and Reika has an older brother, a father we don't see, a mother who practices Akido, and a grandfather that is a bit controlling but is looking out for Reika. Reika also takes her path in life seriously, nearly quitting being a PreCure to see what she really wants to do (though it does not last long). Overall Reika is an amazing ojou that deserves a great score here.
Reika's name in Glitter Force is “Chloe”, and I have no idea where that name comes from. It certainly does NOT fit a proper Japanese lady like her, though given that they probably removed many of the cultural things at her house I guess they're getting rid of that aspect of her. Speaking of confusing names, where exactly does Glitter BREEZE come from? I mean, I could see Nao having that name as she at least controls wind, but Beauty uses ice. I guess the reasoning is that they try to use a “wintery breeze” excuse but that's just dumb! Hilariously water comes from a type of Spring so it's possible that they got the names mixed up xD.
Grade: A

Libido: Reika, as mentioned last week, is part of the famous pairing with Nao. As said, at 8:40 or around the two would often have some sort of yuri interaction. Sadly it seems that Nao is the main one doing these things, no doubt because she can't keep her hands off Reika. That's not to say that Reika doesn't recipricate, the eye contact is mutual and Reika seems to be more of the verbal-compliment type. Overall I approve of the two being together, and not just because it's nice when Zettai and mine favorites are yuri together. I suppose that I should mention that Joker sometimes gets paired with Reika, as each villain seems to get paired with the Cure they face most often, but I'm not too big on that. Overall not bad, but she needs to give Nao more hugs.
Grade: C

Age: Like the other Smile girls Reika is also 14. Not much else to say here, I've pretty much said everything with the other Cures but that doesn't make Reika less special either.
Grade: C

Total Grades: 66
Average score: 7.2
Final Grade: B-

: That may be less than Zettai gave me, yet you were far more positive...

He approves of middle school beauties like you more. Pun not intended.

: I think that he was only harsh because it was while DokiDoki and Mana Sue were still on the air. I'm sure he'd be much kinder to you now.

: That is a relief, I would wish to see him again. Perhaps I shall visit him alongside Kuroyukihime when she goes.


: Right! How dare you not even throw a punch! What kind of PreCure are you?

: The kind that doesn't rush into things. *starts glowing* But since I have enough power now...

*Even though Reika uses her Beauty Blizzard attack the monster shakes it off.*


: OH HO HO! Looks like you've found the secret trait of this boss!

Oh no! It's a Water/Ice type with Thick Fat! Ice will deal next to no damage!

: I don't think that's it...

: Correct. It's more that this monster's pain is sent directly to your best friend!

==Meanwhile, in Spain==

*Zettai shivers.*

Zettai: D-did it suddenly get chilly in here?

: *Not even looking up from her book* Stop lying, it feels just fine in here. Dummy.

: *Also casually reading* Right. Like I'm going to fall for that again and "warm" you with my farts again...

Zettai: No, really! It's like I suddenly got cold!

: Yeah right!

==Back at Endless Cross School==

You can't hurt him, Zettai will feel the pain!

: OH HO HO! Looks like I've got you this time!

No! There's still one thing that Cure Beauty can do!

: There is?

: Nonsense! You're all out of options!

Oh yeah? What about-*whispers in Cure Beauty's ear. She blushes a bit.*

: O-oh my. But I'll try my best!


*Cure Beauty leaps high into the air, and then falls butt-first onto the beast. She uses her immense butt-strength to destroy it for good.*


*Zettai is thrown out of his gaming chair and flung against the room.*

: EH?! What just happened?

: I'm not sure, but seems that Shadow Mewtwo is so difficult he got thrown in real life!

*Zettai has a huge grin and places his thumb upward.*

Zettai: Don't worry, ehehehe. I just felt something soft, yet familiar...

: Dummy...


: Grrr... Seems even my disguises are no match for you! But don't worry, I shall return next time to make sure you're defeated!

*She escapes.*

: Why did you let her escape, Topaz?

What are we going to do, trap her in a cage?

: I could have frozen her liquid body in an ice crystal.

Fair point, she probably wouldn't be able to escape if that was the case. But who would think of freezing a slime girl in ice?

: Well, it would be more likely than smashing into it with my bu-bottom.

: Yeah, what kind of creature has Thick Fat but takes so much from physical Poison-type moves?

: Eh? My bottom is "Poison"?

: Don't kid yourself, I can smell it from over here.

The answer to your question is easy, Ririchiyo. Azumarril.

: Wait a minute! You mean that there's Azumarril without Huge Power?!


: My mind is blown!

: *Ahem* Anyway, shall we finish preparing. Luckily she didn't make a big mess.

Certainly. *looks around.* Hey, this chess board is unusual!

*Topaz holds up something that is certainly not a queen.*

: Yes. It has been some time, but that set has been missing a queen.

*Ririchiyo inspects the other pieces.*

: Hey, don't these look familiar?

You're right.

*Topaz puts his hand in his pants and pulls out a chess piece. It happens to be a queen, no less.*

The queen I got from Shiro!

: Oh goodness, it does match perfectly! At least that means that we don't need to use this anymore.

*Reika hands the object to Topaz, who inspects it further.*

Wow... Hey, this is a bullet!

: That doesn't sound very family-friendly!

That makes me glad that we found it in time. But speaking of time, it's about time for us to be going.

: At least as far as the blog goes. So Topaz, any idea what we're doing next time?

Seems we're on library duty. Hopefully a certain purple Touhou girl shows up!

: I doubt it, but at least it should be quiet.

: Hmmm, if I remember the library will be doing a special on fairy tales next week. I have a friend who might be interested...

I'm sure that we'll meet her. But for now, we'll be seeing you readers next time!

Posted by emperortopaz | Mar 24, 8:57 AM | 0 comments
March 17th, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-eighty-first week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*Today we join Topaz at the top of a hill. At the bottom are girls playing football, and he's watching them carefully through binoculars. Ririchiyo comes up beside him.*

: Hey! What are you looking at here?

YEEK! Oh, it's just you, Ririchiyo. I'm doing my job here and watching the girls play sports. I am their coach, after all.

: I suppose that's fine, but I'm surprised that all these sports teams lost their supervisors all in a row.

It is quite the coincidence.

: And I'm surprised that you're having them play football too.

Football is a great sport and I know a lot about it! After all, I did win three Super Bowls by myself using my super Slam Dunk Home Run combos and won a Stanley Cup.

: ...You know that having a nerd mess up sports lingo is starting to be overused, right? Plus you didn't even refer to
the game they're actually playing with the white and black ball at all.

What game is that? Updog?

*Riri looks puzzled.*

: What is "Updog?"


*Topaz bursts out laughing and Ririchiyo seems annoyed. She even facepalms and sighs.*

: REALLY Topaz? I didn't know I would have to babysit an ELEMENTARY SCHOOL STUDENT! And I meant "Soccer", you dumb American.

By "soccer" do you mean punching a girl really hard or European Football? Because if it's the latter it's going to hurt.

*Topaz bursts out at his amazing pun. Riri again doesn't look amused.*

: Really now?

Right, because it could mean "Sock her" or "You're-a Pe-"

: I GET IT! Geez, stop making dumb puns and get back to the girls.

Sounds like a good plan, heh heh heh.

: Stop being creepy.


*Topaz continues to look out at the girls playing football. One girl seems tired out quickly.*

: *pant pant* I can't believe how well you girls are playing this game of commoners. Even an elder vampire like myself cannot not fall behind!

: Well, I think a lot of us are used to this type of thing. Besides, wouldn't this be easier if you weren't holding that umbrella?

: Nonsense! If I were to expose my vampire flesh to the harsh sun's rays I'd be even weaker! Don't you know anything about vampires?

: I suppose not. I mean it's not like I've seen a blonde vampire walk around perfectly fine during the day or anything...

: Exactly! But enough about vampires, let's get back to the ball game. Though I must say that you're quite skilled yourself.

: I come from a long line of demon-slayers-er, I mean... I do sports stuff, yes.

: That's a relief, if you were really a demon-slayer I'd have to suck your blood!

: I'm not a Caesar salad, you know. But enough silliness, seems a girl is going to make a goal!

*A ponytailed girl in a yellow track outfit runs towards the goal, kicking a ball.*

: Heck ya! I'm totally going to score!

: It's all up to the goalie now!

*The tall goalie, wearing her gloves, prepares in a sturdy stance.*

: Come here!

: Oh, I'll get past you this time! ZINGER STING!

*Karen gives the football a mighty kick, but Komori manages to catch it. She then throws it down the field.*

: Not this time!

: Aww fiddles!

: That's quite the strong goalie we have here. Hard to believe that she's in middle school.

: Yes, it was fortunate that we were able to get her to help.

: Isn't that why you're here too?

: It is. Not sure why though, I'd rather be with Ojou-sama...

: She seems important to you-Wait, that girl came out of nowhere!

*The ball bounces halfway down the field, seeming not to have anyone there but still having someone kicking. Once near the goal the girl appears.*

: Fufufu, I guess that this optical camouflage really works.

: That seems unfair!

: I suppose that she at least turned it off when it really counts.

: Plus a person should still be able to sense her ki...

: Alright then, take this! Assassin's Strike!

*Kaede does a spinning flip before kicking the ball towards the goal.*

: You won't make it past me!

*Komori does a diving save, catching the ball at the last second. Well, probably more within the last ten second, maybe even twenty. I'm bad at judging time. Anyway, Komori tosses the ball down the field.*

: Curses! I guess my weapon has become rusty so that wasn't as much of a killing shot than I had hoped.

: Komori sure is a good goalie. She won't not block anything!

: I'm not so sure, here comes a few more girls.

*Two girls, one in glasses and the other in a gym uniform with buruma, come down kicking the ball. They seem to be going from side to side, kicking the ball straight and uniform as if they were a single entity.*

: Mwahaha! You haven't began to see the power Kururi and I have! It'll totally make your head spin, and not just because we're Twins! Ha! Did you here that, Kururi? I unintentionally rhymed and it was awesome.

: Yes.

: Luckily you're moving slower than usual so that I can keep up, but we're still blazing past the competition! Are you ready for our special move? Too bad, I'm starting it!

*Kururi nods to her sister.*


: Assault!

*The two girls kick the ball at the same time, one with her left foot and the other with her right so both make impact at the same time.*

: Oh no! It's moving too quickly! Komori won't be able to get to it in time!

*The ball bounces off the goal post, shooting out of bounds.*

: Aw biscuits! Did you just see that, Kururi? We got boned! Though not as hard as the characters in that one book I found, mwahaha.

: I saw, pervert.

: Ahahaha, I guess I am.

: Komori is an extremely strong goalie, isn't she?

: I am, just look!

*Komori rolls up her sleeve and flexes, revealing a large muscle.*

: Is there anyone who is never not going to get blocked?

: If only I was a true Invisible Stalker...

: That would be unfair. Plus readers wouldn't understand.

: I added a link, so they should get it.

: Wait, how did you do that in SPEECH?

: Not important.

: Certainly, if only it were easier to score. Ufufu, though part of the challenge is in the chase, isn't that right, Kururi?

: ...Don't pull me into your sex jokes. But it would HELP if Komori didn't block as well.

*The word "help" echoes in Komori's head, but she shakes it away.*

: Wait, here comes someone else!

*A green girl runs towards the goal, kicking the ball in front of her. She then does a leaping kick at the ball.*


*Nao hits the ball so hard that the ground breaks where she lands. The ball goes flying at highspeeds at Komori, who catches it with epic movements. However, the ball is spinning so fast that it pushes Komori backwards and the ball eventually goes to score. It also deflates after being kicked so hard.*

: Finally, now that she scored the final goal go I can go on with my duties.

: Kekeke, "duties".

: Don't mock me for that word!

: You know that this was just practice, right?

: We just needed another player to fill in, and Komori did that.

*Nao offers Komori a hand.*

: Thanks for making it as well. I know I may have over done that a bit, but I could tell you were holding back a bit too. You didn't have to help make me look so good.

: Eh-heh

*Komori rubs the back of her head. Meanwhile, back at Topaz and Ririchiyo.*

Aww man, she didn't take her shirt off to celebrate!

*Ririchiyo slaps his head.*

Ow! What was that for?

: Can it, I know that didn't damage you! And you know plain well why I'm angry.

Because you're the only one you'll allow me to see your DFC for?

*Ririchiyo grabs Topaz's collar and shakes him.*

: OF COURSE NOT! (though I would not mind-NO! I can't get caught up in that. My arrhythmia won't be able to take it!)

At least it seems that Melona isn't anywhere to be seen.

: Hopefully she's not the ball. It would be a good disguise but, really, that's far too much pain even for the slime girl.

*As Topaz and Riri are talking a small, barely noticeable black sphere lands in the middle of the field.*

: Huh, was it supposed to rain today?

: It is almost spring, so I can understand that. March weather is unpredictable.

*Suddenly the sphere grows into a murky monochrome sphere that covers the entire football field. Or half-sphere, as it's cut off by the ground. The girls all go into the fetal position.*

: Buzz Buzz wasn't a dung beetle, HE WASN'T A DUNG BEETLE *Starts sobbing.*

: I can't help everyone...

: I'll let Konoka-ojousama down... I just know it...

: The other girls are just so MATURE... I'm forever zero...

Oh no! Another minus zone, or whatever Melona called it!


*Topaz and Riri look around to find where Melona is. They notice her falling from where the small sphere came from, landing safely.*

: Fortunately my slimy body keeps me from taking falling damage!

Wait, where did you come from?

: Ufufu, wouldn't you like to know...

*High above the field, in the clouds.*

: Phew! Melona is harder to carry than she looks... But at least I'm away from that slavedriver Aldra and her menial tasks. I do wonder what Menace is up to...

*Meanwhile, back at the field.*

: It doesn't matter, Topaz! Just defeat her!

I can't, my powers don't work in the minus world effect! We've got to break one of the girls out of their depression!

: But which one? Most of them are good fighters in their own rights...

The answer should be obvious. But even if it wasn't, remember that Akane was able to function perfectly fine a few weeks ago.

: Really? I thought she was stuck too.

No, the other one. The Cure Sunny one.

: Oh, my mistake. I thought you meant the one with the butt.

To be fair both Akanes have tushies. It's just a matter of which one got the fan-

: HELLO-OOO! We're not having a tea party here, you know!

How rude. She just interrupted our conversation.

: Yeah, no wonder she's a villain.

: But would a villain do THIS? Come forth bad end!

*The goalpost changes into a bat-like clown creature.*


: Oh dear, I suppose that they would. My mistake, Tee hee. Either way, go defeat them!


*It rushes towards the duo.*

: Topaz! Do something!

If only Akane was here!

: I said do something!

I'd do more if Akane was here. Man, Akane sure was great. She defeated her opponent in no time. Akane is probably the best sports person in the whole Cross School.


*Nao breaks out of the despair when hearing so much praise for her rival.*

: I'll show YOU who the REAL sports champion is!

: Hmmm?

: What the?

Just as planned!

: Prepare to face my windy wrath!

: No thanks. I already took a ride with Airi today so I'm all "winded" out. Monster, take care of her!


*The monster turns away from Riri and Topaz, concentrating on Cure March.*

: Don't think that I'll be easy on you! AAAAHHH!

*Cure March gives a flurry of punches and kicks to the monster, forcing it to back away.*

: And for you, Coach Topaz, you'd better do my blog and I'd better get higher than Akane!

I can't promise that, but I'll certainly begin the blog. And as the Fighting Irish just said-

: That's a terrible nickname, Topaz.

I suppose, but either way...

Today's girl is:

Nao Midorikawa
Smile Precure!

: Oh, hey. Today's Saint Patrick's day. No wonder you're talking about Cure MARCH.

Right. It's a shame that the two clover-based PreCures are yellow. But we're talking about one of the few green ones today anyway!

Hair: Nao's hair is really great. She has a short ponytail that matches her color, though is dark green and looks really to my liking. It just fits a sporty oneechan character like her really well, and I like the yellow ribbon that holds it in place too. Sadly the ponytail doesn't even reach her shoulders, but it still looks nice as it has a good amount of volume. Her bangs also look great, though they are split and show a good amount of her forehead but only in the middle. The sides do frame her face well, going past her ears though you can still see them. Overall I'd say that the Smile girls have strong haircuts (with one notable exception).
As Cure March Nao's hair becomes MUCH longer. Her ponytail becomes huge, going all the way to her knees. It's held in by a tiara, like the other girls. She also gains two smaller tails in front, curving around her face and looking like huge side curls. I like how after she transforms for the first time she plays with these xD. March's hair is lighter, but green is still a cool color so I don't mind. Plus it looks really shiny and sparkly too. Sadly in Princess form March doesn't change too much. She only gains a fancier tiara, her ponytail gains a long curve, and the bottom of her tails become somewhat wavy. As far as the Smile Cures go, my favorite would easily be March's hair. It's just so big and fluffy and cool looking! And while Nao scores extremely well, let's just say that a future girl does have a better base form...
Grade: A

Eyes: I forgot to mention before, but Nao is one of two Green Cures. Add that to the fact that Smile started making it super obvious and making Cures color-coded for your convenience and you can understand why Nao has green hair. I bring this up because she also has green eyes. In fact, they also match her hair color. This means that they're dark green as Nao and lighter as Cure March. I don't have a problem with green, and both colors work well. As said before with the previous girls the eye shape is also really great, having a circular pupil and being really cute. Nao does seem to have a bit of a tsurime, if a very modest one, and the fact that the bottoms of her eyes are flat are a bit nice too. She does have a good amount of eyelashes, but they're hard to notice in the actual series and overall Nao doesn't have many problems.
Grade: B

Face: Nao's face isn't too different from Akane or Yayoi's, but that's a good thing. I really like Smile's art style as the faces are curved so nicely. Nao does have a slim nose but it isn't often noticeable. As said before her face is well-framed (moreso as Cure March) and in general it looks really great. She also apparently has the helix of her ears pierced in Cure form, not that it's easily seen due to her huge hair though.
Grade: A

Build: Nao is slightly above most Cures. As with most she doesn't have many curves, but I will say that her legs are fairly curvy. It helps that she attacks with kicks so we get a good amount of close-ups. Being taller than most others, and being the tallest girl in Smile I think helps as well. She also has great athletic ability and in general looks really great for a young teen.
Grade: C

Breasts: As usual Nao doesn't have anything here. Not much else to add here, except that she may not wear a bra. You see, during one episode Nao's shirt is pulled and you can see her shoulder but no strap. As a result people said that she doesn't wear anything underneath (not even an undershirt or sports bra).
Grade: D

Clothes: As said in previous blogs, the Smile girls tend to wear their colors quite often. As a result Nao usually wears green. Like the others Nao is often seen wearing the school uniform which consists of a white-and-blue one-piece dress with short sleeves, but like most of the others she splashes her own color into it. This means her necktie is green and she wears a light green vest over it. It looks really great, at least to me. She also wears white socks that go about to the knee, not bad but better than the previous two girls. She has two types of casual outfits, one being a long sleeved green shirt with decorations on the chest, olive shorts, and black boots with short orange socks. She wears an apron with this outfit when at home. The other is a short-sleeved light-looking green shirt, denim skirt with pockets, and brown shoes with olive socks. She also wears her football uniform which consists of a white-and-blue shirt with matching blue shorts as well as knee-high socks. She also has her gym clothes which is a white shirt with red collar and school crest on her left chest and also red shorts. She also dresses as Alice in Wonderland (sadly she does not drink any “Drink Me” items and grow huge), and in the movie she dresses as Urashima Taro with a silly grass skirt and spats. It's also interesting to hear that her original color may have been purple, which leaves me to believe I prefer purple Cures over any other (...counting Yuri from Heartcatch as “Purple”, of course).
As Cure March her outfit is similar to the others, being frilly and having a light green color (with darker green highlights). She also wears dark green spats, bracers, and white and green boots. As with the others in Princess form she puts on a big frilly gown over her normal Cure outfit. It has a minor light green shade, and a big bow on her chest. Overall the Cures don't have a lot of differences, but Nao still has a lot of great outfits. Would help if she dressed up in cosplay a bit more though.
Grade: B

Personality: Nao is a great older sister type. She's really defensive of her younger siblings of which she has between five and six, as another is born late in the series, and one of the best episodes shows the lengths she'll go through for them. She was so incredibly GAR! Sadly Nao is the least focused Cure in the show, only having about two personalized episodes (and one being her introduction). As said before she's strong and athletic, running like the wind across a building in the opening. She's a strong Tomboy, much like Akane, but Nao plays football instead of volleyball. She also takes care of her family and is able to cook, showing how responsible she can be. It's fortunate that she can cook well as it seems she eats a lot. For example, during the world trip she's constantly eating something at every location they visit. She's not without flaws either, she's terrified of insects (which made the shrunken episode especially hard on her) and she also dislikes ghosts and heights. As Cure March she uses the power of wind to fight. I can't forget that Nao is voiced by Marina Inoue, a very famous VA in her own right that's nearly identifiable by name only (she did the likes of Yoko Littner, Laura Bodewig, and Yozora Mikazuki as examples of big-name work). She does Nao incredibly well, to the point where it's not possible to not cheer for her. Overall she's still my favorite Smile Cure, not just due to her colors or voice but because she's such an awesome older sister, even to the other Cures.
Fortunately Nao doesn't seem to suffer as much as the other girls. There's still some problems with her name though, they went with the punny name of “April” for Cure MARCH. But then they went on to change her name to Glitter Spring to ruin the pun. I can't say if there's more things in the later episodes, but for now at least they treated her alright.
Grade: A

Libido: Nao “technically” doesn't show any interest in any other characters. That said she is childhood friends with Reika (though it's not established at all), and the two often have cute looks or cling to each other. Together they form the 8:40 ship, as many of the occasions where the two are yuri happen at that time stamp. Nao is also rivals with Akane due to both being athletic, though they don't have too much support in the show itself. I guess that as Nao faces off against Majorina, the witch villain, you could consider that another yuri rivalry though not a major one (and, other than her “younger” form, I don't blame Nao either).
Grade: C+

Age: As said with the other Smile PreCures Nao is 14. There's also the child episode yatta yatta. I will say it's a shame that they didn't make Nao older-well she is the oldest but I meant more of an actual age difference. Sure the girls are all in the class, but due to how the classrooms are grouped it could have been possible. Then again that may have been stealing too much from Mint. Imagine that, Toei holding back on stealing things. Seems impossible xD.
Grade: C

Total Grades: 67
Average score: 7.3
Final Grade: B-

: Yes! I beat Akane! Though it's only by a single point. Any ideas how I could make the difference bigger?

She had more help in libido. You should obviously try to do more with Reika to do better!

: R-REIKA? Why are you bringing her up?

*March blushes, though she also seems to glow with incredible power.*

: It seems she's gained enough power for a final attack!

: Perfect! Let's go- MARCH SH-

*Cure March attempts to kick a ball of wind. However, she trips and falls on her back.*

: WAHAHA! How comical! Looks like we've got you this time, Topaz! Creature, squash her!


*The goal post creature flies upward for a dive bomb attack. However, Cure March's eye sparkles.*

: Just as expected...

*March kicks the creature, doing massive damage and destroying it as well as the minus world.*

: W-WHAT? How could she have done that!

Don't you know? Wind deals more damage when you're in the sky!

: Like with Gust or Hurricane!


: Curse you and your Pokémon knowledge!

: It looks like your time is up, fiend!

*Setsuna places her hand on her sword and draws it slightly.*

: Am I going to have to cut you to ribbons?

: Er, um... Look, a UFO!

Don't fall for that, she already did that.

: Don't worry, we're not as easy to distract.

: Hmmm~ What to do what to do.

*Melona raises her hand high, even using her slime ability to make it long and skinny.*

: What the?

She's trying to get away!

*Airi flies by and picks up Melona, flying away.*

: MWAHAHA! Smell ya later!

: *sighs* Is this the extent of my skills now? Being used as an escape method?

: Yes, now hurry!

*They manage to escape.*

: Curses, they managed to get away!

*She untransforms.*

: But it seems that our time with you is over, Topaz.

: It was fun!

: I must be getting back to Konoka-ojousama.

*She leaps away. The other girls also leave.*

: Well, seems like you did alright with this job. What's next on the agenda?

Seems that I'm helping out the student council next time. Hopefully they won't give me a cold shoulder.

: That's a terrible obvious hint. But didn't we already help out the student council already?

That was one, but this school seems to have a lot of student councils.

: I GUESS there are a lot of kids, but still. That seems over the top.

Regardless, looks like we'll be meeting with a certain friend's favorite soon...

Posted by emperortopaz | Mar 17, 7:56 AM | 0 comments
March 10th, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-eightieth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*We start the blog with Topaz sitting behind a desk. In front of him are a few girls with easels, all pointed at a bowl of fruit. In the back there's various old art projects, such as sculptures, paintings, and other works.*

Welcome back everyone. Last week I had a lot of fun being a gym class teacher, but this week I'm being more serious. I'm having the girls all paint!

: Good to see you actually helping out.

Of course! Art is easy as all I have to do is sit here and judge the paintings the students do.

: I should have known you were being lazy...

: ... *concentrates really hard on the canvas.*

: Nothing wrong with being lazy here and there. Besides, I'm sure he'll grade us based on style points too!

: Y-you really think so? Because I don't know if I have the right colors down...

: I'm sure it'll be fine.

: Perhaps... But how about I take a look at what you're dr-AAAAAAAHHHHH!

*Yayoi looked over at Haruna's art. Immediately her face turns bright red and her eyes become amazingly cute and teary.*

: What do you think?

: I-I'm not sure middle school students like us should know things like that.

: Oh yeah? Well then take a closer look!

*Haruna holds up the canvas, taunting the sobbing Yayoi. Topaz gets up.*

Hey! Stop tormenting her! You know what? How about I take a look at that.

: Don't let that authority get to your head, Topaz.

O-oh my...

*Even Topaz blushes looking at the artwork.*

I'm not sure the banana is supposed to go in there...

: It's nothing dirty! Just two mechas combining!

That's not the kind of "symmetrical docking" I like to see. It's completely inappropriate!

*A meganekko rushes to the door.*

: Did someone say something about inappropriate robot docking? Cause I TOTALLY approve!

: Great, now we have TWO meganekko perverts...

Hey, aren't you supposed to be in the high school area?

: Probably, but hearing about mecha-on-mecha action drives me crazy! It's like a siren's song of energy that draws me to it! Ahhh~ So great!

: Shouldn't you be getting back to your classes?

: Hey, I'm not the only inappropriate girl here.

: But Haruna is supposed to be in this class!

: ...Yeah! Er, wait. What?

It's not important. We're just trying to get rid of an interloper.

: "Interloper"? I'm surprised to hear you're kicking me out, Topaz. After all, isn't your assistant the same age?

: Hew hew hew, if you think that I come here without doing my schoolwork first you're sadly mistaken.

: But what about Sora appearing last week.

That was honestly a mistake!

: ...I thought your excuse was going to be something like "She skipped so many classes by being a hikkikomori that she had to have a few classes over again".

Oh yeah. That is totally the reason and not a silly excuse.

*Rika stomps her foot a few times.*

: Fine, I see that I'm not wanted! But I do expect a blog next time I see you, master of stones!

*She walks off, with Topaz hanging out the door frame behind her.*


*He returns to the classroom with a sigh.*

: I'm surprised you shooed her away. Would have thought that you'd like having a meganekko like her around.

Yeah, but I can't be too careful. Remember, Melona was able to slip into the room without us detecting her. It could have been her in disguise.

: True, though she's only been in pictureless forms up to this point.

Fair point.

: Hey, what are you two talking about?

Uh, er, um.

: A maniacal curvy slime girl with acidic breast milk is currently after Topaz.

*The three girls look at Riri with blank stares.*

: W-what?

: I don't even know if that's true or not...

: That sounds highly unlikely. Seriously,, how did you come up with something so silly-sounding.

You'd be surprised. We've faced stranger.

: I don't know. This is pretty farfetched.

Ah, good ol' DUX.

*Ririchiyo facepalms.*

: ...I knew it... I knew once I was halfway through the word it would become a Pokémon joke...

That's just a word that's not used as much outside of that one instance. Besides it helps that I've been playing a lot of the Blue version recently.

: Ah yes, the thing that's been taking up so much of your time lately.

*Topaz says nothing and averts his eyes.*

: I knew it... *sighs.*

: So are we safe from this "Melons" girl?

: Her name is "Melona".

Though I do like that nickname for her. But don't worry. I'm sure that I'll be able to pull through again.

???: Fufufu... Do you really think that?

*Topaz and the girls look around the room to see where the voice is coming from.*

Where is that coming from?

???: Over here!

*A statue stands up.*

: MWAHAHA! I was here the whole time, and you didn't even realize it!

: What the? That statue is talking!

: Figures Topaz would pick the Sugita one though...

It was either that or the Daisuke Ono one-wait, what are you talking about?

: N-nothing, just commenting on the image and-

: Enough complaints! Allow me to show you my true form!

*The statue dissolves and returns as a curvy pink-haired woman.*

: Hello everyone!

: Such a scandalous outfit!

: I actually sort of like it, fufufu...

Quick girls! Defeat her!

: Hey, didn't you say you'd protect them?

I only said that I'd take care of it. Besides, I'm not one to harm a woman most of the time.

: I think this is a fair point for an exception!

: It doesn't matter how many you throw at me. I'll take you all on!

: Wait, I can't transform if Saki isn't around!

: That seems inconvenient and really easy to take advantage of!

: Oh no! I left my artifact in my other bag!

That sounds like a horrible excuse. Guess it's up to you, Yayoi!

: Hauuuu... I hope I can do this-N-NO! I know that I can!

*Riri holds up a flat hand.*

: Curses! I lost!

*Melona holds up a fist.*

: Good ol' reliable Rock. You always come through for me.

: Don't get cocky just because you've beaten my transformation sequence!

: So what did you do, Topaz?

*Topaz looks in wonder at his hand. It is in a V-shape, with a gap between his middle and ring fingers.*

I honestly forgot...

: *Whispers* Spock smashes scissors.

Oh, thanks!

: Ehhh? What is this "Spock" you speak of?

A famous character on a famous television series. But that aside seems I defeated you, Cure Peace!

: *Obviously overacting.* NOOO!

As a result, you must allow me to do today's blog on you!

: I-If there's no choice!

Today's girl is:

Yayoi Kise
Smile Precure!

: Hey! Don't think you can get another blog under my nose again! I'll defeat you for sure!

*Melona turns the bowl of fruit into a large monster.*

: What? Don't have a pretty picture for this one?

Sadly no, but mainly because I'm lazy.

: *Sighs* Well, whatever gets you to do the blog I guess.

: Don't worry, I'll protect you!

*Peace and the monster jump at each other and start battling in mid-air.*

Hair: Yayoi has some really interesting yet adorable hair. Her hair is yellow, matching her Cure color like the other Smile Precures, with it becoming slightly lighter as Cure Peace. Anyway, Yayoi has sort of short hair, only reaching her shoulders. That said it's EXTREMELY voluminous, poofy, and fluffy-looking, being as wide as her shoulders. Her hair curls forward and rests near her chin in cute little rounded ends. Her neck is nearly completely hidden, only showing a bit between the ends in front so that her hair is much like a scarf. Not only that, but she also wears a white headband with orange decorations on the sides and she has straight bangs (I'd call it a hime cut, but having her hair come forward makes it her own thing). It's really unique and cute, and I like it overall.
Unfortunately it's Cure Peace that I think is a seriously downgrade. Her hair “seems” shorter as the hair around her head is gone, getting pulled back into a ponytail. Her sides seem to pop out a bit, revealing her ears with earrings, and the sides of her bangs also pop out at an angle while she gets a large middle bang. As said before her hair becomes a ponytail, going upward before coming down in a wide curve that looks like a triangular shield protecting the back of her head. Or a palm tree with one big leaf. If it was forward more, I'd imagine that Cure Peace would have problems looking to the sides due to how large it is. It also curls slightly at the bottom corners. She also wears a tiara, much like the other Smile Precures. Now, even with these complaints I don't dislike Peace's hair. I find the way she gets surprised by her ponytail popping out really cute, and in general it's an interesting design. I just find it a downgrade compared to her civilian form. Princess Peace's (not to be confused with “Princess Peach”) hair is a bit better, with the ponytail becoming wavy rather than curved and she also gains two long side curls that reach her chest.
Grade: B+

Eyes: Smile Precure does really well for my tastes in the art department. Yayoi is no different as, even though she has golden/yellow eyes, I still find her eyes really cute. They're a tarame shape but that fits her personality really well and her eyes shine with a great radiance. Her eyes are really beautiful too. They're a bit brighter in Cure form, though again that works as it matches her hair. Overall Yayoi's eyes are lovely and the only problem, even if I don't mention it as much as I used to, is her lack of glasses (imagine Yayoi in dark, thick frames. It would have gone so well with her framing hair!).
Grade: B

Face: As said last week, Smile Precure's faces are really great for my tastes and Yayoi is no different. Yayoi also has a lot of extremely cute facial expressions and overall is a really “moe” character. Her hair frames her face really well too, making her seem even more adorable. She's so cute that I have a hard time finding the words to praise her looks. Yayoi has a small nose, and her chin is somewhat more rounded compared to her companions, though I think that's just to make her seem more innocent (it works though).
Grade: A

*The two continue their battle, with Cure Peace doing amazing acrobatics.*

: Wow, she's surprisingly good. Kinda wish that I could join her.

: Now now... This is her blog so give her a chance.

: I understand. Maybe Topaz will give me a "blog" too, like that Zettai guy did with Saki.

: Possibly, but I can't imagine that it will be any time soon.

*The fruit creature makes impact, punching Cure Peace across the room. She stands up but electricity runs through the creature. It seems to be moving slower.*

Great job, you paralyzed it with your Static ability!

: Wait? What?

: Your shield of electricity lowered its speed!

: I see, like in a battle manga!

: Quick! Paralyze her back with a hard stare!

*The monster glares at Cure Peace with its fruity eyes. She seems unaffected.*

: Eh? Oh, wait. Electric types can't be paralyzed.

*The fight continues.*

Build: Yayoi is extremely cute in all ways. Unfortunately her short, youthful body doesn't really appeal to me. She's probably has the least curvy body on the team not to mention the shortest, which means she doesn't score well here. She also doesn't have any good scenes either, not that I'd expect any but it would have been nice.
Grade: C-

Breasts: There's really not much to say that I haven't said before. PreCure are not known for busty girls, and they'd look silly considering all (or at least the majority) the girls are middle school students. At least kid's franchises don't seem to force the “busty middle school girl” stereotype...
Grade: D

Clothes: Yayoi has a fair share of outfits. The most common one would be her school uniform which consists of a white shirt, either a dull yellow vest or cardigan (depending on if it's the winter or summer uniforms), a blue skirt, and a yellow necktie. I am not sure why each girl has a different color necktie despite being in the same class, other than the obvious “keeping with the Cure colors” theme. If you can't tell Yayoi's character color is yellow. Her casual outfits include a yellow-orange jumper with long-sleeved yellow shirt underneath or a poofy white shirt with a ruffled yellow shirt on top with jean shorts with ruffled bottoms. She really needs better legwear than socks that don't even reach her knee. When in gym she wears a white shirt and red shorts with a white stripe down the side, and at night she seems to wear dull yellow pajamas. She also wears a cute waitress kimono in the theater village episode with a yellow plaid kimono, red obi, and a small blue apron. During the fashion show she dresses as Red Riding Hood with an appropriate hood and big red bow with a yellow dress, and in the Cinderella episode Yayoi was the Fairy Godmother so she wore a witches hat with a black dress and a silly hand rod. In the movie she dresses as Son Goku (sadly I don't mean the Turtle Hermit uniform version, even if I want to say that's what Yayoi was thinking of xD), which consists of a tiger print skirt, a yellow-orange breastplate over a dull yellow shirt, bracers that match the breastplate, red handkerchief, spats with monkey tail, and red boots.
Cure Peace's outfit is really cute as well. It's not much different than the other Cures, with poofy shoulders, a big bow in front, and a blouse and skirt that are a mix of white and the Cure's color (yellow in this case). I do approve of her cute yellow spats, though I like the short sorta-transparent wings in back too. She has boots that reach halfway up her shin, but I really would like her to have better legwear. Princess Peace again has a similar outfit to the other Princess mode girls-er, the Smile ones I mean. Basically it looks like she has a frilly wedding dress over her normal Cure outfit, with a big bow in back.
Grade: B

Personality: Yayoi starts out being a a bit of a crybaby. Nothing wrong with that, I mean that in the best possible way as she does seem to cry at the drop of a hat. Fortunately she gets a lot better, improving as the series goes on. She goes from an extremely shy and anti-social girl into being more open (though still shy, which is good). She's good at art, but needs Miyuki and Akane's help to give her confidence. She also enjoys drawing manga, with a creation based on Cure Peace called “Miracle Peace” (the character even has blonde twintails so Yayoi should scold the later-season Mirei for stealing her looks and name of “Cure Miracle” xD). Yayoi is also fairly bubbly and optimistic (other than in herself), and in general is an extremely moe character. Despite seeming like a “cutesy” girl Yayoi also enjoys hero shows, which is why she accepted being a PreCure so well, as well as Super Robot shows. Sadly this does not mean she can pilot the Happy Robo. She's extremely passionate about being a Precure, using her attack even if it surprises her a bit at first but she starts to endure her thunder. It shows how much she's grown in the series at that point, being much more confident. Yayoi's voice actress is Hisato Kanaemoto, and she gives the character a cute and not too high-pitched voice. Hisato is probably most well known for being the “new” Ami in Sailor Moon Crystal, but she has a lot of other roles like Amy from Gargantia, Ika Musume, and another Moe character. Every portion of Yayoi, even her voice, easily makes her one of the, if not THE most adorable and moe PreCure (at least for most people). Oh, and I can't forget about mentioning that Yayoi is bad at math. That's not too bad, a lot of people aren't good at it, but for a middle school girl getting confused by the question of "4+3+2+1" makes Yayoi seem especially stupid.
Probably my least favorite aspect of Yayoi would be the April Fools episode. You see, Yayoi gets pranked by her mother's lies and decides to prank her friends in a similar matter. Unfortunately Yayoi says that she's changing schools, making the girls panic and the rumor get way out of hand, to the point where she's barely able to tell the truth. It was generally just a bad misunderstanding spread out for a whole episode. That said, it's balanced by Yayoi's far better episode where she remembers her late father and the reason behind her name. It's due to wanting Yayoi to be kind as a mother when she grows up, if wondering. The episode was extremely touching and-eh? Saban, really, you couldn't dub Yayoi's best episode? Really? I mean this is the one that made me appreciate her FAR more than I did before, and you don't want to talk about dead parents for dumb reasons? *sighs* Well, I suppose that when you call Yayoi “LILY” the name idea really doesn't fit the plot of the episode (not to mention how confusing it will be when another Cure fits the Lily name much better. Not that I want Saban's grubby hands on the glorious Heartcatch, but still). Oh, and they also took away one of Cure Peace's best aspects. You see, whenever Yayoi transforms she uses a “ Jan-Ken-Pon” praise and uses one of the three hand symbols (rock, paper, and scissors). It was cool playing against her, even if I didn't actually keep track of the wins and losses. Instead, because apparently Saban doesn't want kids playing with scissors (even ones made out of fingers) they changed her phrase to "Puppies and kittens, the power of Love! I'm Glitter Peace!" which makes absolutely no sense. Not only that but it ruins the jokes that play off of Peace's transformation, namely the ones early on where Candy would play against her and Akane would wisecrack that they can't tell the difference with Candy's small fingers.
Overall Yayoi is a great Cure. I really appreciate how they showed her growing and becoming more outgoing without losing her roots either. The main problem is that I tend to like most of the other girls more than her, though that's just because Smile is particularly good as far as characters go (while lacking in plot).
Grade: B+

Libido: Sadly all of Yayoi's points here are mostly incidental. She seemed to have a good relationship with Akane when the series began, though she would often pick on Yayoi in a friendly manner. Yayoi also gets a combination attack with Reika, but otherwise their interactions aren't that major. As far as villains it seems that Yayoi's main rival is Akaoni, though I wouldn't support that. Yayoi is also likely one of the most popular Cures in general so she gets a lot of fan art (not something I judge on, but interesting to know).
Grade: C

Age: Much like the other Smile Pretty Cures, and most Pretty Cures in general, Yayoi is only 14. As said in Akane's blog last week there was also an episode where the characters became kids, but I won't count that. I will say that we see Yayoi in flashbacks during the episode where we learn about the name, and she was plenty cute then too.
Grade: C

Total Grades: 60
Average score: 6.7
Final Grade: B-

*The creature peels a banana and throws the peel. Cure Peace trips on it, landing on her butt and starts to tear up.*

: Ouchies! N-no, this is a time to be serious!

: I think if anything that sort of attack is the LEAST serious that it could possibly do...

Quick, now that the blog is completed you can destroy it now!

: Wait, why wait until now?

: Dramatic suspense!

That may have something to do with it, but it's more because my blogs gave her more energy.

: That's right, and it's time for my finisher!

*The fruit monster lays defeated.*

: I'm honestly surprised that hit. Both Thunder and Hurricane have such poor accuracy...

Must be raining outside. That would explain it.

: This is no fair! HOW? HOW was she able to use her upgraded attack like that! I was supposed to beat it easily as Grass defeats Electricity, but why did she add flying to it!

Zapdos is awesome, and seems that we've kicked your grass!

: Topaz! Language-wait, no, that was alright. My mistake.

: That's true, better escape! Grrr, we'll meet again!

*Melona leaps out the window.*

Wait! We're on the second story!


*Melona makes a splat sound as she hits the ground. She manages to escape unharmed due to her slimy body.*

: Curses, we let her get away again!

Don't worry. I'll be on higher alert from now on!

: Let's hope you remember.

*Yayoi returns to normal.*

: I did it!

Thanks for saving us all!

: Not that we were in much danger, though.

: Right, at least she didn't hit us with that despair world this time. B-but still, thank you.

: You're all welcome, and thanks for the blog, Topaz.

Any time, I love giving girls blogs! Though seems that next week we're going to one of the sports clubs!

: Is it the Mecha Musume Club? Or the Mecha Girl Club?

Sadly it's just an ordinary sports club, but those sound like things we should visit as well!

: I guess that means it'll just be another Cure or something...

Well, it is that month so...
Posted by emperortopaz | Mar 10, 8:42 AM | 0 comments
March 3rd, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-seventy-ninth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*As we enter the blog two teams of middle school girls enter the gym. One team wears red buruma and the other clad in blue ones. One of the blue members rushes over and hugs a member of the red buruma group.*


: Mimori-OOMPH!

: How I missed you! If only we weren't separated in groups like this by the new gym teachers.

: It's not the school's fault that they double booked for some reason. Also... Mimori?

: Yes?

: Can you not hug me this-gyak-tight?

: Oh dear me, Yuuna. I was so glad to see you that I gave you such a marshmallowing hug! Sorry to have embarrassed you like this.

: It's not that, Mimori. You know exactly what I'm talking about. Your hands are fondling my butt.

*A close up of Yuuna's red butt being fondled occurs, with her buruma being moved to wedged up her butt.*

: But I haven't seen you all week, and you were obviously seducing me with these tight sexy buruma!

: Yours are even tighter though!

*She smacks Mimori's butt, making it jiggle. One of the red buruma-wearing girls lets out a sigh at their sexual fondling.*

: Can you please keep your antics to your private lives?

*One of the blue buruma-wearing girls grins at Homura.*

: Are you sure you aren't just jealous? Perhaps you'd like having a relationship similar to them with me?

: I already have Madoka. Plus you should keep your cow-like chest away from me.

: So rude! It's not like I had commented on the rank pantyhose you're wearing under your buruma.

: It's a fashion choice!

*A blue buruma girl with short black hair comes between the two. A red buruma girl with short twintails also comes up.*

: Ladies ladies. Calm down.

: Right! We're all magical girls here!

: Well, not all of us.

*Two red buruma girls step forward.*

: Some of us are just gamers.

: Harumph. I just want to get out of here and get with my older brother.

*Two blue buruma girls step forward.*

: Agreed. While I appreciate the idea of athletics I do not see the point if the teacher is not here.

: Hey, he's probably just late!

: Idiots, both of them. *Turns to Yukari, barely trying to make an effort for conversation.* So what did the blue team do this week?

: I suppose that we could talk about what we did.

: Certainly, it was a blast doing all the stretching we started the week off with.

: You should have been there, Yuuna. I needed someone to lock arms with and you're the strongest girl I know.

: Though it was a pain with our thin white shirts. I'm pretty sure our supportive bras were visible!

: I am sure it was just your imagination, Mr. Topaz was only watching to make sure our backs were strong enough. It is vexing why his gaze fell lower though...

: Perhaps Topaz is a lover of the female figure and even in the face of obvious mamocentricities he's one who would give a fair chance to our butts jiggling in their tight buruma. Better than what MY series would do, anyway...

: I don't think anyone wants to think of that sort of disgusting thing.

: Wow! It sounds like you all stretched out a lot! We had to do stretching too, even with the arm locked back-stretching you did.

: Though the pervert kept watching our plump butts jiggle together.

: He also had us do a lot of squatting, and I nearly sat on his face!

: That was awesome, though not as awesome as what Kuroyukihime here did.


: What happened?

: She ripped one RIGHT on his face!

: It's not my fault, it's all because those girls in the cafeteria gave me extra sweet potatoes! I'll remember them, one was dressed in gothic lolita and the other had a leaf-hair.

: A leaf in her hair?

: No, a leaf made out of hair. Sorta, at least. I remember as I got the bonus too.

: Though the gas did help as it popped my wedgie-ing buruma right out!

: Don't say you did it on his face too! You know your gas is only for me...

: Of course. I'll always save my stinkiest ones for you.

: *Ahem* Anyway, on Tuesday we had trampoline practice.

: Oh yeah! That was loads of fun. We were doing something called "special appeals".

: Harumph. I do not think that they were that "special". I do note that all the stretching before hand did make it so that my back was not as sore as expected, but Mr. Topaz's instructions were quite vexing.

: True, not to mention all the balancing side-to-side as well. We were really jiggling!

: That sounds like loads of fun, but not as much fun as swimming! I won a lot of races!

: Not against me!

: Hey, that's unfair. You know you cheated by using the "jet" strategy! Not even that one wedgie idea Mr. Zettai told us to do could catch up to you!

: I will say that Kuroyukihime and I looked great in our white sukumizus, while the rest of you had blue ones.

: Not that I care, but was there any reason behind the color choices?

: I think he said it was to help us stand out against the water. I imagine it was just a foolish excuse.

: Not that I mind, I think I looked great in it! Mr. Zettai didn't even mind that I blew a hole in back.

: How naughty, though I'd love to see that. If only we were in the same group.

: Swimming reminds me that we did that yesterday as well. Luckily our pool is indoors though.

: Still felt a bit nippy, but I imagine that wasn't on purpose.

: I'm just glad that Mr. Topaz let me keep my glasses on, though not sure why he was so adamant in getting the other girls to wear glasses too...

: How vexing...

: Hmm? I don't remember seeing you at the pool, Akeno. Where were you?

: Er... I-I just put on a bit too much suntan lotion and slipped, bruising my butt. Luckily Mr. Topaz was there to kiss it and take me to the nurse's office.

: I see then, hopefully you feel better today.

: Wait, why were you using suntan lotion at an INDOOR pool?

: Er, force of habit? (I can't let them know that the lotion keeps water off enough that I can maintain my legs...)

: Whatever...

: Our day yesterday was a lot more fun, we got to practice wrestling!

: I do not see why Mr. Zettai allowed us to beat up on him like that. He seemed happy that my pantyhose thighs were wrapped around his neck though...

: He seemed to like the facesitting more. And the butt sumo, especially when Yuuna used her gatling-style attack.

: You should have seen it, Mimori! I gave him a huge stinkeye too!

: Sounds lovely... In fact, how about you show me an example right now?

: Oh Mimori, you know we don't do that in front of people.

: Y-yes, of course.

: Perverts.

*Homura sighs while brushing her hair in a great way. Outside the gymnasium a female voice is heard.*

???: I still can't believe that you made middle school girls act that way! I knew I shouldn't have left you alone that whole time!

*A familiar male voice is heard.*

I gave Zettai a chance for fanservice, so there shouldn't be any problems! Hopefully, at least.

*The gym doors open, revealing a hime cut girl riding on Topaz's back.*

: Just because there's not problems with your reader doesn't mean that you will get away with this-Oh, hello girls.

*The girls all welcome Ririchiyo. She gets flustered and hops off Topaz's back. He then stands up.*

: So this is your class then.

Not all of it. Now girls, I said you shouldn't get here for fifteen more minutes.

: So what are you going to have the girls doing today.

*Topaz holds up a volleyball.*

What does it look like?

: I guess volleyball.

You'd be correct. Now girls, line up by color.

*The girls line up, with there being some obvious differences between the red and blue teams.*

: H-hey... I just noticed something particular about the teams... Like it was split on a very specific feature or-

It's all in your head, I assure you. Now, let's get started here...

*The two teams start playing each other, jiggling their buruma butts aplenty. However, unknown to Topaz and the others, up in the balcony.*

: Fufufu... I'm so glad that I learned how to use this brush better.

*Melona uses the brush to spread black paint across a blank book.*

: Come forth, bad end!

*The gymnasium turns monochrome, and the happy ball-playing girls all fall to the fetal position.*

: So much despair...

: If only I could transform, but it's not worth the effort...

Riri! The girls are going into despair! We have to do something.

: Mumble mumble he'll never accept me...

Oh no! They got Riri too! I'd better get out of here!

*Topaz attempts to open the doors, but they are clouded by black smoke.*

Curses! If only I had a Pokémon with cloud clear!

: I don't think that would be much help anymore, as your time is up and you dropped your combo!

*Melona stands on the balcony's edge, resting on the railing.*

: Without your girls to save you it'll be simple to destroy you!

Oh yeah? Well let's see how you take my summons!

*Topaz attempts to summon, but it fizzles out.*

: Fwahaha! Looks like the minus world effect of this attack really works. You can't summon or use your abilities at all. Face it, you're at MY mercy now!

As sexy as that sounds, I'm sure that my luck will keep me from dying so easily!

: Oh yeah? I've conquered all the girls, and even though it's taking most of my energy to hold them down it's not like you have any surprises left in sto-

*Melona is tackled in mid-sentence by a mysterious middle school girl. The two fall to the ground, with the girl tumbling to keep from getting hurt. Melona just becomes fluid to absorb the blow.*

: So who is this student I seem to have forgotten about?

???: Don'cha know about me?

Posted by emperortopaz | Mar 3, 8:33 AM | 0 comments
February 25th, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-seventy-seventh week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*The blog begins with Ririchiyo running towards the board game club room. She opens the door and heads in, seeing a dejected Topaz and a shadowy girl sitting across the table.*

: So you were already here! Why didn't you wait for me.

I figured that I'd play a few games before we begin the blog. But I've never been so emasculated...

: I'm pretty sure you have, and you've enjoyed those times.

But this is different, just look at my pants sandwich!

*Riri glares at him, unamused by how he put that.*

: Are you sure you couldn't find a better way to say that?

*Topaz points to the sandwich he recieved last week, sitting on the table beside a board game. While the girl has a ton of money, Topaz side is practically empty. The sandwich is less than an eighth of its previous size.*

: I see, but how did this happen?

???: Fufufu, it's because Nii somehow lost his talent for games!

: Nii? Like in "Oniichan" or something? Oh yeah, Imprint ability and all that. So who do you think you are, taking Topaz's sandwich like that.

???: _____!

: Wait, say that louder. I think I missed it.

???: _____!

: I don't get it.

Her name is "Blank".

: That's ridiculous. It would make more sense if this was the Nintendo Fan Club, but I don't get why Blanc would be here.

Not "Blanc", "Blank". Though you are right that she's also "White".

: Enough difficult clues, can someone just tell me what's going on?

???: They call me...

*The girl raises her head and brushes her long flowing blue hair away.*


*Now that Shiro has been properly introduced Topaz and her fold up the game and place it in the box.*

: Now that I won again, I get half of your sandwich again!

Fine then, a deals a deal.

*Topaz breaks off half the sandwich again and hands it to Shiro. She eats it quickly.*

: Mmmm, the taste of victory.

: Wait, so why are you giving Shiro your sandwich again?

It's a long story, but I'll explain it in a flashback.

*Flashback music plays while Topaz narrates.*

You see, I had came here early. With no one here I decided to eat the sandwich. However, I saw a pile of blankets move in the corner, and out of them crawled Shiro with her laptop.

: I was playing a MMRPG.

: Hopefully not that one Zettai likes, you're far too young for THAT sort of thing.

Anyway, Shiro became jealous of my large meal and pouted cutely. She challenged me to a game and if I had won she would have let me do my blog on her!

: I hope you would have waited for me. N-not that I care to participate, but I can't keep you out of my sight without some fiend challenging you or you doing stupid perverted things.

Can I do regular perverted things?

: NO!

Fun-stealer. Anyway, I accepted Shiro's challenge, saying I'd give her half of my sandwich if I lost.

*Return to the present time, where Shiro has a smirk as Topaz is putting a chess board together in front of her.*

: Sounds like you lost. But why didn't you do something you're good at, like card games.

*Topaz continues to set it up as he continues.*

Oh, I did...


*Topaz and Shiro shuffle the other's YuGiOh decks.*

Alright then, this will be for half the sandwich or blogging rights.

*Shiro nods.*

Let's flip a coin then. Call it in the air.

*Topaz does so, with Shiro quickly calculating the odds.*

: Heads.

*It indeed lands on "heads".*

Alright then, you can go first.

*The two players draw their hands of five cards.*

: Let's begin then!

*She draws a card, keeping her actual hands covered in her oversized uniform.*

: ...I play Royal Magical Library, attack position. Then I equip Wonder Wand to it. This causes it to get a Spell Counter.

Is that it for your turn?

: Fufufu, you wish. I now activate Card Destruction!

*Both players discard their hands. Topaz still has a hand of five cards while Shiro has three.*

Looks like my hand is bigger now.

: Check again... Specifically in the graveyard.

*Topaz gasps.*

Broww, Huntsman of the Dark World?! And three of them at that?

: That's right, so I get to draw three more cards! *Does so* And I activate this Pot of Greed". *Draws two more cards, plus one for the Royal Library.* I'll continue to play spells, Triple Upstart Goblin! Triple One Day of Peace! Triple Into the Void!

*Shiro continues to thin her deck more and more.*

...Am I really needed here?

: Fufufu, you should learn your place and not challenge a gamer like me! Graceful Charity, discarding useless cards! Allure of Darkness, banishing useless a Dark monster! Broken Bamboo Sword!

Wait, that last one doesn't seem too bad...



: That's right! Then I activate Wonder Wand, sending it and my library to the graveyard. Now that my deck has finally been exhausted I can show you my win: EXODIA, OBLITERATE!

What? Exodia? No one's been able to use his effect!

*Shiro reveals the five pieces of Exodia, sending Topaz reeling back. With that we return to the present. Topaz and Shiro have started playing chess during the flashback.*

And that's how it happened.

: Sounds rough, but probably just a fluke. Why don't you play her in something you're better at. Like Magic, you've got a good record beating up blog girls.

That's what I thought as well...

*The flashback begins.*

: HEY! You can't make this whole blog flashbacks!

Don't worry, this is the last one. Anyway....

*We return to the flashback, where Shiro starts eating the large sandwich.*

I can't believe that I lost that quickly...

: Don't worry. You lasted longer than the rest of the game club. Hey, why don't we play double or nothing? I'll even let you pick the game.

Well then, I pick Magic!

*Shiro nods and starts digging around in the cabinets that make up most of the room. She bends over so much that her loli striped-panties butt is shown.*

(: Was that detail really necessary?

Of course!)

: Alright, deck obtained!

*Topaz gets out his deck and the two shuffle the other's.*

Now, I'll go first this time.

*Shiro nods.*

Alright then, I play this Mountain and cast Lightning Bolt for three damage!

*Shiro loses three life, putting her at seventeen out of the initial twenty life.*

: Surprised... You dealt damage to me...

Don't be too surprised, the early bird gets the worm!

: Yes, but the second mouse gets the cheese, and it seems you've left yourself wide open for attack!

It's only the first turn. What could you possibly do?

: I exile Simian Spirit Guide for one red mana. Using that I cast Faithless Looting, discarding Griselbrand and another card. Then I play Blackcleave Cliffs and tap for one black. Exile another Simian Spirit Guide and play Goryo's Vengeance on Griselbrand. Attack you for seven, gaining seven life. I then pay 14 life to draw 14 cards. I exile two red cards from my hand to play Fury of the Horde and attack with Griselbrand again. I then exile two more red cards and play another Fury of the Horde. That's 21 damage, my win.

....*Topaz whimpers.*

*Return to present.*

: Okay... I can see why you were slumped over like that when I got here now. And also sorta understand why Shiro is the only member of the games club around.

I know, it's like she has some strange power over games of chance and stuff! I mean look!

*Topaz points to the chess board. The only pieces of his remaining are the King and one Bishop.*


I don't know either! I mean, I'm not great at chess, but wow!

: Fufufu, simple probability. And seems that with this win I get the last of your sandwich! Om nom nom.

My poor defenseless sandwich, I barely knew you.

: Talk about ruthless. How about you allow Topaz to do your blog, Shiro?

: I suppose that I did humiliate Topaz enough for one day. Sure, go ahead. I'll curl up and snooze a bit.

*Shiro curls up among the heavy blankets and large poofy pillows.*

I thank you for being so generous. And viewers, I may not be good at games but I still manage to say that...

Today's girl is:

No Game No Life

: Hey, you're not calling him "Nii" anymore?

: There's no way Sora would lose THAT many games in a row.

Hmmm, seems Imprint has a few more holes than I expected. Oh well, here goes-

???: WAIT!

*An unknown loli with pink hair and unusual eyes shows up at the door.*

???: Is this the board games club?

Sure is!

: We're about to be busy. Can you come back later?

???: Awwww, and I had just found this rare game!

*Shiro's head pops out of the comfy pile, a pillow sitting on her head in a silly fashion. Her eyes are stars.*

: New game!

*She sits at the table with Topaz and Ririchiyo.*

: New game, new game!

So what's this game you've brought?

???: You see, it's called... DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS!

*She holds up a book.*

: Pssh, Topaz has played that before.

: Me too, I even have a favorite character.

Don't worry, I have a character for you too, Riri.

: Alright, I'll play your dumb games too.

???: Excellent... Fufufu.

*Topaz hands Riri her sheet, gets out his own, and Shiro gets hers out from the cabinent.*

???: Well then... Let the adventure BEGIN!

*The mysterious loli takes out a paintbrush and stains the book. Suddenly the trio are zapped into the Dungeon literally. They fall in front of a gigantic castle.*

Oof, that seemed a little too realistic.

*A nameplate with "Topaz" and "Human Bard, Level 20" appears as Topaz stands up.*

: Right, though fortunately it seems that we didn't take any damage.

*Ririchiyo's nameplate has "Tiefling Duskblade Level 20" appears for her. For Shiro she just looks around in wonder cutely, her nameplate saying "Wizard 5/Incantrix 10/Archmage 5//Cloistered Cleric 1/Factotum 8/Warblade 11. She's also floating around on a big disk.*

And people call me lazy.

: Hey, I need this to carry all my loot!

: Enough arguing you two. Seems we've been transported here.


*The girl appears at the top of the castle.*

???: I'll let you go if you can defeat the minions I left before you!

Should be easy.

???: And no flying up here either!

: Of course, what's the sport in that?

*The three enter the castle where they meet with the first challenge. The door locks behind them loudly. In the rather large entryway is a fully alert Great Wyrm Red Dragon.*


*It breathes fire, though fortunately the three mostly avoid it.*

: Quick, do your bard stuff!

Trust me, you don't want to see me sing. Or dance.

: Well then do your blog, that's what everyone is probably waiting for.

Fair point. Let's get going!

Hair: Shiro has unique but beautiful hair. It's mostly light blue, though there's a purple gradient as her hair goes down. The manga also has her hair be a green or blue color near the end, though from what I can see that wasn't retained in the anime. That's a really lovely effect and makes her look really pretty. Speaking of looking pretty Shiro's hair is extremely wavy and flowing, cascading down her back like a waterfall. Shiro's hair is also really long, going past her hips but fortunately the series still shows off her butt. Her bangs are pretty unusual, mostly due to being messy and seeming like she has a lot of ahoge, but she also has a really long middle bang that goes past her chin. Her sides are wonderfully framed though her ears are still shown through. In general her hair is excellent and remind me a lot of Konata from Lucky Star, but Shiro's messy bangs do hurt her slightly. Oh and she occasionally wears a cool tall crown and it looks nice on her.
Grade: A-

Eyes: You might think I'd dislike Shiro's red eyes, but they're actually quite nice. They fare well with the color of her hair, though I'd say that the manga golden color fits her better (I always say that golden eyes are nice for KDEG girls). She has a strong tsurime, with her eyes having a flat top at worst but usually a steep decline towards her nose. She does have quite thick eyelashes but that's an effect that all girls in the series seem to have. Shiro's eyebrows are also really small. Probably the biggest problem, other than her lack of glasses (that I remember, at least), is that her eyes are telescopic. What I mean is that she has a circle in her eyes that bothers me a bit. It's nothing too major and I wouldn't have noticed it if I wasn't researching closely but it's something that makes me think of eye monsters. Like the “final” boss in Persona 4 had that effect.
Grade: B-

Face: Shiro makes up for her eyes easily with a super-adorable face. Her cheeks look soft and squishy, which works really well for my tastes and is even better on lolis like her as it gives a very youthful look. She has a slight blush to make her cheeks look rosy and even softer. Shiro's eyes are a bit large in comparison to her overall head, but that fits with her being younger than the other characters. Otherwise her small features are really nice to look at. Even better is that she normally doesn't show emotion, save a few cat smiles for dominance in a game. At one point her and her brother Sora do look like JoJo characters, but that's just for a joke. Otherwise this is Shiro's strongest point, at least for me.
Grade: A


: Really? That didn't help at all!

Well, talking is a free action.

: Tut tut tut. Don't worry, I know exactly how to defeat him.

*Shiro opens one of her many packs. Out comes a bat, which flutters towards the dragon. The dragon tries to hit it, but the bat is too evasive. The bat eventually runs smack dab into the dragon's chest, causing it to fall motionless.*


: Fufufu. Shivering Touch and my familiar's ability to deliver touch spells. And now to finish it off: Cone of Cold!

*Shiro attacks the motionless dragon with a burst of ice. Riri and Topaz help by beating it up directly.*

???: GRRR! Seems you defeated the first pet, but that's not the biggest challenge! Come up the stairs!

*The trio goes up the steps to the next arena. They arrive in a circular room that seem to be made of mirrors. In the center is a multi-eyed creature with a large head-body.*


: Oh no! Now the lawyers will get after us!

Don't worry, I don't think any of my readers will tell anyone.

???: In this room the Beholder's many eye lasers will make quick work of you!

: Do your thing, Topaz!

On it!

Build: Shiro may be a short, flat loli, but it's easy to see why she's the lead. She has a really great body and even non-lolicoms can feel attracted to her. Maybe it's her long flowing hair, but she has a really perfect body. Her navel is cute and her legs and feet are fairly alright with a great shape on each, both of which are shown off well. She also has a surprisingly meaty tushie a well, and while it's usually covered in striped panties it still looks really great. The art style does make her a bit shiny but I enjoy that and it's not done to access either. Shiro is also so short that she's about a head shorter than any other character, Izuna excluded. The only problem, beside not appealing to my standard tastes, is that she lacks certain things. Namely she lacks a crotch and nipples due to an unfortunate shiritori accident. Written out that seems quite silly, but still. One can only hope that it was only during the game as it took place in a magically contained universe. Oh, and I'll also add that she dislikes baths (other than wanting to bathe with Izuna) so she's probably a smelly girl if left alone and I know someone who would like that.
Grade: B

Breasts: Sadly Shiro doesn't do as well here as my tastes are terrible. She's flat and she even lacks nipples. The flatness isn't a problem though, it fit with her age and body shape and they actually do a good job portraying it.
Grade: D

Clothes: Shiro usually wears her schoolgirl uniform, but has some variations. As far as her uniform, it consists of a blue sailor uniform with a white collar and a yellow scarf. I'm not sure if the uniform has a skirt as Shiro is so small that her uniform top extends to her thighs and looks more like a dress at times. It is possible that the skirt just meshes so well with the same-color uniform that I have difficulty telling the difference. Apparently she wears it because she remembers Sora saying that it was cute. She also wears dark thighhighs, bringing out the power of her legs even further. As mentioned before she wears striped panties and shows them off quite a bit, which is nice. When she defeats Steph a few times she wears her clothes, namely her panties and bra which Shiro wears on her head with the rest of her clothes wrapped around her neck like a cozy scarf. We also see Shiro wearing a noble-looking dress, the type with poofy sleeves and skirt, to show herself as a queen. That dress she wears a red bow on the neck. Sadly this is the extent of her wardrobe, unless you count how she's naked in all her baths and during the shiritori game.
Grade: B

: I meant something USEFUL (not that I don't appreciate you doing the blog, but still).

: Eat my Flesh to Stone ability!

*It shoots a laser at Shiro, but it bounces off uselessly.*

: Ray Deflection.

???: GRRR, you and your permanent buffs! Alright, Beholder, use your eye on it!

: Anti-magic eye it is!

*It aims a black cone from the huge eye in center at Shiro. While she seems effected, she instead folds her arms and yells.*


*The cone shatters, leaving everyone except Shiro and Topaz confused.*

: What was that?

She destroyed the effect using sheer GAR ENERGY!

: No really...

*Topaz opens a book and points to it.*

See, right there?

: Wow, you really aren't kidding.

: Ufufufu. Now what are you going to do?


*The beholder shoots out its strongest attack. However, rather than being deflected Shiro instead RE-flects it using a shield. The beholder is hit directly and crumbles to ash.*

: Sometimes that once-per-day reflect spell really pays for itself.

: I think that your character is overpowered.

: *whistles innocently.*

Anyway, now that that challenge has been defeated how about we continue?

: Right, we're over halfway done with this.

: Lead the way.

*The trio leaves the mirror room. The next room appears to be outside, in a plain meadow. A mountain appears to be in the center, however.*

???: Ugh. I can't believe that you defeat the beholder!

In all fairness it's far weaker than our party.

???: Oh well! Prepare to face THIS creature!

: What crea-oh... OH!

: Goodness!

*The "mountain" gets up on its hind legs and lets out a mighty roar.*


: What kind of dragon is this?!

: It's not a dragon at all. It's the mystical tarrasque, a being so powerful only one exists on a planet. It's like a force of nature rather than a creature.

Who could be pitting us against such powerful creatures?!

: Don't you make even stronger ones?

Yeah, but those are for stronger heroes.

: Still.

: I know what to do, Topaz. You continue the blog, and I'll take care of this...

Alright then, I'll finish up quickly.

Personality: Shiro is an excellent example of a hikikomori or NEET. She stays home instead of going to school, playing games with her older brother. That said there's a good reason as Shiro seems to be super-intelligent, explaining her lack of needing to go to school, and that goes well with playing strategy games. She has a photographic memory as well, and as an example she memorized EVERY state a chessboard and knows the optimal play to do. She is poor at reading emotions (that's an advantage Sora has) but considering she's a great quiet and emotionless girl it works really well. Okay, so not quite “emotionless” as much as “reserved” or “stoic”, but still. As said she plays with her brother, sharing a namesake of “Blank” in many games (or to be fair it's written as “__” or something similar). The duo work off each other really well, with Shiro doing most of the brain work in games. That said she does have a communication disorder and doesn't talk too much other than using her brain to play games really well. She's also weak to being separated with Sora, nearly going through withdrawal the first time, and when put in the Tokyo-like game world she curls up in a ball and shudders. I do like how she grew to the point where, when Sora disappears from existence later on, Shiro is the one that fought to get him back as it shows how much she cares. She's an adorable gaming girl that's hard not to like, and a perfect example of a great moe little sister character.
Shiro's personality is amplified by her adorable voice as well. Ai Kayano does a perfect tone and light delivery for Shiro, and it makes her even more irresistible. She also calls Sora "Nii" which isn't great but still cute, and refers to herself in the third person for additional cute factor.
Grade: A-

Libido: Shiro does fairly alright here. She does have some problems, like refusing Sora some type of service, but she does seem to have a lot of affection for her older brother. As I said in Suguha's blog I don't have a problem with incest and I'm guessing that she wants to be her brother's only love. It's cute to see her cuddling up on his lap. And apologies but it seems that she's only a step-sister to Sora, but the duo are really close and it's hard to tell. To be fair Shiro also has a few other interests. One of which is the animal lolihag Izuna, who Shiro likes to cuddle up with and rub against her tail. It looks really cute though not too lustful I think. There's also a time where, for magic reasons, she seemed to lust after Jibril the Yukarin angel. This is a bad scene as they seem to have only done it for the NTR fetishists and the characters even bring up that point (not to mention that Shiro marshmallows herself, it's not hard to see Jibril as one of the weaker Yukarin characters). At least it was done after Sora was affected by the same thing and said his love for Shiro, but still.
Grade: B-

Age: Sadly this is probably Shiro's worst area (for me). She's only eleven, while Sora (her older brother and possible love interest) is eighteen. That's a pretty big difference, but I shouldn't judge too harshly as I'd praise it if the genders were reversed (with an older sister with a preteen brother). That said eleven is really low in my scale, below even the normally-suffering middle school girls.
Grade: D+

Total Grades: 66
Average score: 7.3
Final Grade: B-

And that's the blog for this week!

: *clicks tongue.* I was hoping for more points.

: Don't worry, that's pretty good for a loli. More than the majority of PreCure and similar girls.

It helps that Shiro shows off a bit more, but she still has a few low places. They're places you'd expect to be low fromme, but still.

*Shiro shrugs.*

: I can only imagine what an actual lolicom would give me...


Ah yes. We were still in the middle of something.

: Summon Undead V (five)!

*Two ghost-like undead appear.*

: YOu RaNg?

: Touch that creature!

: YeS mIsTrEsS...

*The ghosts seem to haunt the creature, waving around as it attempts to hit their incorporeal bodies. Eventually their strikes prove too draining and the beast falls.*

: Fufufu. Good thing I kept this scroll around: MIRACLE!

*Shiro pulls out a scroll and casts a spell, making the giant creature's body disappear.*

Hurrah! Only one thing left to defeat!

: Yeah, but it'll probably be something really difficult!

: Bring it on!

*The three heroes head into the next room. They then climb the stairway to the roof. Sitting there is the pink-haired loli, sitting in a chair with her leg crossed over her lap.*

???: Heh heh heh, seems that you've finally arrived.

: Don't tell me that you're the last boss, that would be too convenient.

Right, plus she doesn't even have a portrait so she can't be important.

???: Just because I haven't revealed myself doesn't mean I'm not important!

So many negatives, I think I may have gotten confused.

???: Good, maybe you'll hit yourself. But I still have one last enemy!

*From the cracks between the stone ceiling a white substance flows out. It eventually grows to a size greater than 30', or over 9 m tall.*


: It's so gooey!


What sort of thing is this?

: Seems it's a Bone Ooze!

*Topaz giggles.*

Well, it does match the color of-


: This is serious! Bone Oozes are the strongest ooze-creature. They're immune to so much that I don't have a good spell available!

: Really? You're not prepared for something?

: I mean, who really uses “ooze” creatures. Elementals sure, Demons or Angels I can see, but we just went past a DRAGON and a TARRASQUE. This seems like a big downgrade...

Wait... An affinity for oozes... I think I know this girl's identity!

???: Really now? Who could it be?

*She twirls her pink hair and winks her symbol-having eyes.*

My only question is this: What does Suu want to defeat me for?

*The mysterious girl falls in a silly manner.*

???: I'm not this “SUE” girl at all, for I am-

*The girl melts into the floor and reappears as a curvy adult with pink bunny ears.*




: GASP! Wait, who are you.

: One of Aldra's underlings. I'm guessing, as she's at least a villain from the same series.

Right. Though I'm surprised she's going against me. Didn't you help Zettai against Chitoge.

: That was delicious and different. This time I'm ordered by Aldra, but it's still enjoyable knowing that I'll be the one to defeat you!

A lot of girls have said that, but we'll defeat you and escape this book!

: Oh yeah? Urufufufu, Bone Ooze. Defeat the small one!

*The Bone Ooze surprisingly charges Shiro, absorbing her loli body in its partially-transparent body. Bubbles come out of her mouth as he attempts to breathe.*

: Oh no! We've got to save her!

I know. Not only will the beast's ability drain her dump stat of Strength but it'll also pull the bones right out of her if we're not quick enough!

: How gross.

Right, and I have an idea... *whispers to Ririchiyo.*

: Fufufu.... You have nothing you can do.

Oh yeah, well take this: HASTE!

*Clocks appear around Topaz, Ririchiyo, and Shiro's bodies and they disperse, making the characters glow red.*

: So you're a bit faster, so what?


*Riri makes a total combination of 5 slashes at the ooze, hitting each one.*

: Wait, where'd the extra attack come from?

*Melona flips through the books.*

In D&D Haste gives an extra attack.

: And I used a maximize rod to make sure I did the max amount of damage possible! Not only that, but due to my Power Attack feat and the Ooze's low AC I dealt over 500 damage in that turn!

And the maximum hit points for the ooze is just over 400!

: BLOB Blob blobbbb!

*The ooze shudders and falls to the ground, melting away defeated. Shiro is sticky and has minor damage, but otherwise unfazed.*

: Eww. Gross.

: I agree.

: GRRR! You haven't seen the last of me! I was the one who sent the monsters against you for the past few weeks as well!

Looks like we have another enemy in our midst, Riri.

: Not this again...

: For now I'll allow you to escape, but the next time you won't be as lucky!

*The world around the trio shatters. Back at the board game club Riri pokes Topaz until he wakes up.*

Wow, you wouldn't imagine the dream I had, Ririchiyo. And you were there!

: I don't think that was a dream, but at least Melona has stopped bothering us.

*She points to a sticky book of D&D.*

Where did she go?

: I don't know. She was gone when I woke up too. But I imagine that we haven't seen the last of her.

Certainly. Hey, where's Shiro?

*Shiro is nodding in her sleep in the chair across from Topaz.*

: Mmm? Someone say my name?

: We're just glad that we made it through that.

*Shiro stretches and yawns.*

: That was a very fun game though. Hopefully I'll be able to play it again. And thank you for saving me, Topaz. For that I shall give you this.

*Shiro picks up one of the extra queens from the chess board. It seems to be made out of blue glass or crystal or something similar.*

: I found this extra queen in one of the boxes. It must have a match somewhere, so go and find it. And if you excuse me.... MMPH!

*Shiro cutely flops back into the pillow area, snuggling up and falling asleep.*

: Well, seems that this blog is finally over.

Right, it became much longer than I expected.

: Hopefully next week will be shorter.

I can only hope so. Seems like we'll be teaching gym next week.

*Topaz looks out at the track, covering his eyes from the sun.*

Hopefully it warms up.

: I'm sure it will. If not the students will be inside and that's fine too. The can play an inside sport like volleyball or basketball or something.

Sounds oddly specific. But either way, see you readers next week!
Posted by emperortopaz | Feb 25, 8:12 AM | 0 comments