emperortopaz's Blog

June 23rd, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-ninety-fifth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

: Welcome back everyone! And as you see I'll be the announcer this week.

Hey, whatever happened to Koto?

: She suddenly had to leave for some reason. Something involving Aldra-sama.

*Meanwhile, up in the VIP room Aldra is sitting on Koto's back.*

: Ufufu... Seems you're really enjoying this punishment.

: Of course, Aldra-sama. Everyone would love such tender care.

: I knew that you'd make the perfect slave. But I'm not as tender a queen as you may think..

*Aldra lifts Koto's skirt and starts smacking her fat butt.*


*She secretly enjoys it.*

: Ufufu, it's so much fun to tease my subjects. But for now I'm going to keep sitting on your back for the WHOLE fight.

: Sounds wonderful, I'm such a lucky minion!

*Back to the main stage.*

: So anyway, I wasn't paying attention to the battles so far. Can anyone clue me in?

You're not as good as Koto, now are you. Anyway, for the past few weeks I've been climbing the tournament ladder.

: Though to be fair it's more like Mortal Kombat as Topaz has to face everyone in the competition.

Exactly. And we've been her at the Forge Arena as I nearly got disqualified because I had trouble finding it. I manage to beat both Setsuna and Centorea, and last week I had to fight Annelotte. It was a rough battle, but I managed to come through. As you can see. This time I have to face Undyne.

: Sup? Pssst, who are we talking to again?

: Topaz has some sort of "blog" where he talks about Anime girls.

: I see then. Reminds me of what Alphys writes then. But why am I here? Besides to defeat the horrible HUMAN!

*Undyne points to Topaz.*

: You will rue the day that you came to face me!

: I still find it silly that Topaz is doing Undyne. She breaks so many common rules. What's next? Some Overwatch girl? Shield Knight? Some other obscure video game character?

: Hey, wasn't her game voted #1 in some poll or something?

To be fair I wouldn't take GameFAQs as a reasonable judge of gamers.

: Just look at all the stupid whiny Americans! And Topaz is only one of those things.


: Who cares about poles, unless they're the kind that I can impale Topaz with!

I disapprove. Besides, we have to do the blog first!

: Why's that?

I'm not sure, but it's been that way since the first blog this month.

: I think Topaz mentioned something about wanting the girl to hear his thoughts and they often go away after the battle.

: Well then, I guess I just won't have a blog! WAHAHA!

: Oh no! Undyne just launched a powerful psychological attack on Topaz! How will he get out of this one?

Why bother?

: Wait, that's not what you are supposed to say! She may be a troublemaker but we still need to do a girl this week!

True, but we obviously can't do one on Undyne.

: Wait, why's that?

Because you're obviously not AWESOME enough to deserve one.

: GRR! I'll show you JUST how awesome I am! Fine then, do your stupid blog! Bet I'll score ALL THE POINTS! Gwahaha!

: I am surprised that worked, but I'm not complaining...

Anyway, since this girl is raring for battle let me introduce her by saying...

Today's girl is:


: Pssst, does he always say something so odd?

: Usually the links are better, but that's what he gets for using a non-Anime character. I just hope that he doesn't have to put any silly anime relations still...

: What do you say we get this blog on. I'm getting a little hot under the collar. Must be the summer heat.

*Juri tugs at her neckline to get a breeze of wind down her shirt.*

Well then, let's get on with the show!

Hair: Undyne has a really strange hair style. It's pulled back all the way, and looks nearly bald in front most of the time. In fact, at first one could mistake it for part of a plume on her helmet rather than hair. Basically she has her hair pulled back in a ponytail, thought the animation in battle does have a cool bouncy, waving effect. In a certain run through her “powered-up form”, which I'll explain later, makes her ponytail spikier. Her hair is also a bright red, which isn't too bad (that's one of the reasons I thought it was a plume at first). Luckily it doesn't look bad on her, and in battle due to the monochrome enemies it appears white. Undyne does receive some help with a certain date-form, as in Alphys's date she actually styles her hair a bit different. Some of her hair is freed, and she places it over her left eye in a nice feminine style. Though it's completely possible that she's wearing a wig (especially as it's black in that part rather than white). Still, her uniqueness isn't completely bad, and as an aquatic-looking creature having any hair is a surprise.
Grade: C

Eyes: Undyne does not have great eyes for my tastes. One of the first things you'll notice is that she has an eyepatch over her left eye. I don't mind it too much as it makes her seem intimidating, and when in her “improved form” it starts to shoot out lasers! It fits with her personality well, is what I'm saying. What's less interesting is the fact that she has reptilian-like eyes, meaning that she has yellow sclera and vertical pupils. They do not look great, and I really dislike different colored scleras (and she eventually gets black sclera as well). She also wears heavy red eyeshadow, though in battle it's not detailed. Problems aside Undyne's eye shape isn't too bad; she does have a strong tsurime and her thick eyebrows don't look bad either. Overall she does have some problems I have trouble getting over, so she doesn't score too well here.
Grade: C-

Face: Undyne also has a pretty poor taste, though I blame some of that being in a sprite-based game. As you should be able to tell, she has blue skin and fins on the sides of her heads (where ears usually are). They're also blue with red markings, if curious. She does not have a nose, which is a good thing for my tastes, and her mouth is really big. Well, maybe not “really” but it's still large due to having big, yellow, and pointed teeth. Unfortunately her mouth and teeth are a big problem. For one, her upper lip is defined but as a result her side-profile makes her goofy-looking. Her teeth also look buck in both the sprite and most of her battle images. I think that they were trying to make it look like her mouth is constantly a bit open, but it's not a design choice I'd approve of.
Fortunately, the fact that the speaking boxes have character images-and the fact that they're well-emoted-helps Undyne out quite a bit. She has a lot of various emotions that are seen through there. Some of my favorites include a big toothy grin and a laughing version that's really humorous to look at. She also has a more reserve cat mouth-like one too. Overall these help her a bit, but Undyne really doesn't do too well due to her unusual looks.
Grade: C+

Build: Undyne doesn't do too well here either. When we first see her, her body is mainly hidden by the large suit of armor she's wearing. That said, when we see her in a more relaxed outfit it's surprising to see she's so thin. Not in a bad way or anything, but I was expecting her to be more muscular. I guess that's due to the sprites not showing too much detail as she seems to be strong. Also, Undyne doesn't have too much of a feminine figure either. Her hips are a bit wide, but other than that she's skinny. As a plus she does seem to be fairly tall, easily taller than any of her love interests by at least a head or so. I'll also add that she's a fish-like humanoid monster, and Monster bodies in Undertale are somewhat unusual but that's not too important.
Grade: C

Breasts: Undyne has a very slight curve to her upper body, but I imagine that she's more muscular than anything.
Grade: C

Clothes: Finally we get to something Undyne doesn't completely bomb out on! But really, she does have some cool and interesting outfits. We first see her, as said before, in a cool suit of armor. It's black and due to how the location we see her in is she's well-shadowed. In general it's a heart-pounding escape sequence and she's made out to be extremely intimidating. Her helmet also has a glowing eye. In battle it sort of reminds me of armor from a certain long-running shounen anime, which kinda makes sense if you think about it. When in her upgraded “Undying” form her armor becomes spikier (especially on the shoulders and gauntlets). It also gains a heart decoration on the torso and smaller ones on the hands. Undyne also can create and throw big blue spears, presumably made out of energy.
When not in armor Undyne wears a lot of casual outfits. Her main one consists of a black tank top and blue pants with red shoes. It's hard to tell the details of the clothing due to the sprite work, but a lot of games are like that. For a date she also wars a white turtleneck and a black presumably leather jacket. In the ending at the beach Undyne wears a yellow two-piece bikini though the bottom looks more like shorts than a bikini bottom. Overall not too much, but more than I'd expect from a sprite-based RPG like this.
Grade: B-

Personality: As said, when we first see Undyne she's extremely intimidating. This is helped by having other characters build her up for you. During the chase scene there's a lot of goofy moments as well, with a running joke where Undyne gets interrupted by Monster Kid. She's also a fairly difficult battle no matter what, as in the route where you kill things she becomes Undyne the Undying. Other than a silly pun with her name this form shows how determined she is and how much willpower she has. She's extremely hot-blooded as well, which is awesome. Undyne is also honorable, refusing to attack those on the phone and trying to make excuses for hunting the human. She's also extremely passionate about things, always throwing her whole self into something. She even gets egged into becoming the Human's friend through taunting. She also helps out other monsters as well, and is the captain of the Royal Guard. In general she's a cool battle-loving girl. As more information, she doesn't like hot or cold weather (she even has a warm fridge), she may dislike sweet or sugary foods and soda, and she seems to dislike puzzles but enjoys Papyrus's japes. There's also a funny part where she wonders if Anime is real as she was told it defines human history. Luckily you can assure her that it is.

: Why? Is anime NOT real?

I think it is.

: How can you be sure?

Besides all the girls around that are from anime, you mean? Let's see... Personally I've ridden in a mecha, rescued an alien princess from the clutches of a demon king, and seen gigantic swords and magical girls.

: That sounds AWESOME!

That it is. But overall Undyne is a really great, well-defined character that I wanted to blog about. While I probably forgot some things, she's a great battle-loving hot blooded girl with both humorous and caring sides.
Grade: A-

Libido: Undyne has pretty good libido, even if she's more innocent. She's too scared to give her meganekko girlfriend Alphys a note for a date, which leads to confusion. She then interrupts said date when Alphys thinks the main character wrote it instead. In the end scene they nearly kiss, but another character tells them not to kiss in front of the Human. Fortunately Undyne still gives Alphys a kiss in the good ending credits, showing both their love and that Undyne is in the lead. Undyne also goes on a date with the racially-blank Tumblr-gendered Human, giving the Human a lesson in cooking. The cooking becomes so hot and intense that Undyne's house burns down! Wait, perhaps I should have put that better... Oh, and because her house is on fire Undyne goes over to her friend Papyrus's house. While friends they don't seem to have any romantic feelings and are purely platonic.
Grade: B-

Age: Undyne's age is unknown. I'd say that she'd be in the late teens or twenties (considering she's the captain of the Royal Guard), but I can't be sure. Monster ages are strange, as are their romances, in this game. Apparently she also followed a currently-aged turtle on his adventures when she was younger.
Grade: B

Total Grades: 57
Average score: 6.3
Final Grade: C+

And that's the blog for this week!

: FINALLY! Now we can actually fight!

You don't have an opinion on the score?

: No. Why, is it really low or something?

: It's on the low side, yes.

: TOPAZ! Now I have another reason to destroy the likes of you! Now, prepare to take my spears!

*Undyne summons spears in various patterns on the ground, spiking them up. Topaz has to roll around, but he avoids them.*

: Looks like the battle has finally started, with Juri sending out a flurry of attacks!

*Crowd cheers.*

: Thank you for the cheering, I'm glad to be considered your champion!

You won't be the champion much longer, as I'll dethrone you! Then I'll face off with Aldra and get her to stop her plans!

: Don't think it will be as easy as you are thinking. Especially if I do THIS!

*Undyne swipes Topaz with a green-colored spear. He is unharmed, but he gains a green heart symbol on his chest.*

Oh no! My hitbox!

: Gwahahaha! Now I have you!

*Topaz attempts to move, but cannot.*

Now I'm stuck!

: She SLASHED you and now you can't move? Man, it's like that one jungle-based robot master in seven all over again! But I thought that green meant you were good at DODGE-ing!

Maybe, but I sure couldn't teach it!

: I blame Gohan being a poor student, perhaps...

: Seems like Topaz is in quite a pickle! Pun unintended. But without his high evasion skills how will he EVER be able to avoid Undyne's spears now?

: Ufufu... I have you now!

*She creates a floating spear and sends it flying in slow motion at Topaz.*

: Hopefully a plumber will leap at it and redirect it! (Hopefully I haven't been making too many references this blog...)

*As the spear is about to hit Topaz he remembers the girl from last time.*

*A shield is created just in time, knocking the spear away.*


: Looks like Topaz has finally used his Mimicry powers. As a result Undyne's powerful spear attack was blocked by his great shield!

: Seems that Topaz has a few more General abilities than I thought... Wait-that joke w-wasn't intentional!

Looks like I thwarted your attack, Undyne!

: That's right, I should just give up and-NOPE! Don't think that a simple SHIELD will get you through this! En GUARDE!

*Undyne surrounds Topaz with spears, attacking one by one. As a result of the floating shield seeming to move how he wants he's able to block all of them.*

That's not how you spell that.

: You must be joking if you think I CARE!

*Undyne starts using odd attacks, redirecting the spears at the last moment. Still, Topaz seems to be blocking them. His heart beats heavily, as if his demon form is trying to get out.*

I can block all day!

: Be careful! Remember that you were able to break through Annelotte's shield with Centorea's strength. Undyne might be the same!

Don't worry, I'll just leave the screen. That way I can get all the dragon's treasures!

: This isn't Shadowgate!

: Plus if you leave the arena you are disqualified.

Holy glasses, forgot that part! Guess I'd better think of a better idea-and QUICK!

*Undyne's attacks continue, though they seem slower for some reason. She pants as she speaks.*

: I'll... break through... this shield! Or my name is not UNDYNE!

*With a burst of power Undyne breaks through the sheild with a charge. However, at this moment Topaz's green-heart status runs out and he barely evades.*

Phew. That was a close one. I nearly got kabobed!

: I have a feeling that's not a real word. And don't be too careless, Undyne may be planning something!

: T-that's.. right... oof.

*She falls face-first to the ground.*

: What the?!

: HOW?! Did you see that folks? Topaz just defeated Undyne. I think. He didn't actually attack at all, but somehow she fell to the floor!

I imagine it's because of the Forge Arena. Aquatic bodies such as Undyne and Juri seemed to be sensitive to the blazing flames and molten metal.

: I was just thinking this land was fairly HOT.

: True. I'm sweating and I wasn't even fighting! Even my BUTT is sweaty!

: Too much information.

I'm sure SOME reader will enjoy that. But it looks like I won this one.

: Don't say that yet. This is a battle to the death, so there's no count down!

I remember Koto saying something like that. But even when the girl obviously can't fight more?

: I want to do something, but those are Aldra's rules. She even mentioned something like...
: Of COURSE you should attack those that can't fight back! Use every VICIOUS ADVANTAGE you have!

You know, that impression was spot-on...

: Mmmbbb-blkkk...

This is no time to be impressed, Undyne needs my help! But what do I have that can quench her thirst?!

: This is beginning to sound like sponsored content. But I doubt it as Topaz didn't bring home another bag of money.

: Looks like you only have a few more minutes left! What will you do, Topaz? Leave your opponent to die, or forfeit and save a life?


*Topaz gets under Undyne's body and tries to pull her away on his back.*

I'll help her-URK! Back... breaking... words... difficult to get out-KYA!

*However, she seems to be too heavy and he falls to the ground. He is able to get out of under her and stand back up.*

What can I do?

: What about one of your many items?

I don't think a picture of lolis or a rabbit's foot will be much use, Ririchiyo. If only some sort of refreshment would fall from the sky!

*Suddenly a vending machine falls from the sky and into the arena. Everyone is shocked.*

: D-did that REALLY just happen?


: Stop joking around and do something!

Fine then... Hmmm, let's see here.

: Why are you even taking so long?

Well, the Fresh Water is more economical but the Lemonade heals more overall...

: We don't have time to go shopping, Topaz. Just pick one!

Fine then!

*Topaz kicks the machine and a can comes out. He then pours it on Undyne.*

Wow, I'm lucky that this was water and not, say, coffee.

*Undyne coughs but picks herself up.*

: Just like the other human... Perhaps humans are not as cruel as I had expected.

: There are plenty of cruel humans, but Topaz certainly isn't one.

: And from those dishonorable rules it seems Aldra is a cruel one. Seems like I have a SPEAR to pick with her. But for now, it seems that our battle is over.

*Undyne hops down from the arena.*

: You can't, like, just GIVE UP like that!

: I'm not “giving up”. Topaz outlasted my attacks, and I don't want to be in this blasted place for one more minute.

*She leaves, only to be confronted by three other shadowy figures backstage.*

: Who are you two?

???: Our names are not important.

???2: All that matters is that you, like us, have a dislike for Aldra.

???3: We are going to strike after Topaz has weakened her in battle. Can we count on you?

: You mean get back at the one that made me fight in such a warm place, knowing I might faint? Then LEAVES me for dead? YEAH I'm going to want to face her!

*The four of them slink back to the shadows.*

: Congratulations, you've finally won the Colosseum matches for once!

Hurray! Though I do wonder how that vending machine came flying through...

I guess that's a matter for another day though. Looks like I'll finally be battling Aldra!

*In the VIP room*

: MENACE! Nothing you've done has gone right! Each of these “Honor blades” have fallen without Topaz even breaking a sweat or into his demon form. I mean sure, that Annelotte form did have a bit more power and I could feel his demon side trying to come out, but we need physical proof! And it's all YOUR fault!

*Aldra turns and points, but sees Airi standing next to her instead.*

: My apologies. *looks around.* Where did Menace go? I have to have a TALK with her.

: Is it like my punishment “talk”? Because it was enjoyable!

: Shut up, you SLAVE!

*Aldra kicks Koto in a sexy dominant fashion.*

: OHH!

*She secretly enjoys it.*

: Ah-HEM. It seems that Menace has left. She's right THERE!

*Airi points to the arena.*

: Hmmm, seems she's going to face Topaz herself. Fine, I'll let her mistakes slide if she makes him use his demon form.

*Back on the arena floor, where Topaz is surprised to see Menace.*

: What's this? Another competitor?

: I am not a competitor. But I have come in place of Aldra-sama.

You can't just change the prize like that.

: Do not worry. You shall face Aldra-sama, but first you shall have to get through ME!

: ANOTHER battle?! Man, if we're going to stay here I'll have to get some type of refreshment.

: Koto will be joining us again next time, and the battle is switching locations.

Not again!

: At least they're telling you ahead of time this time!

Fair point. Where is it?

: We shall face each other in the Terrain Arena. And we shall battle next week, as is natural for your blog.

Seems we've got a girl for next time. I'll be seeing you readers then!
Posted by emperortopaz | Jun 23, 8:25 AM | 0 comments
June 16th, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-ninety-fourth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

: Alright everyone!

*Crowd cheers.*

: That's right! It's finally the third Thursday, and that means we'll be getting to the next battle! If you missed last time, Topaz triumphed against Centorea. Though to be sure I'm not sure how. He just ran around until she sort of fell out of the ring.

Hey, it worked! You never heard of bullfighting?

: This isn't Spain and you're not your friend. And I don't believe that bullfighters suddenly grow wings and fly away!

That might be more interesting though. But I guess that's more something a person would do if they were BUFFALOfighters...

: Fair point, I think those might have wings. But enough about wrestlers with ten-million power.

: Agreed! And I'm personally glad the previous battle didn't end with Centorea bursting out of her shirt.

I know, Centaur Flash is a terrible attack against bosses.

: That's NOT the reason! Besides, I don't think that's how the attack works at all...

Who can know for sure. I mean, in some continuities Centaur Man IS a Wo-man.

: Huh, I guess that one Master in Nine really wasn't the first female then. Maybe, at least.

Wait, a female “Master” involving “Nine”? Is that any relation to a certain Saturn scout?

: Sadly no.

: I'm lost, so let's get back to the bloodshed! Now, Topaz was about to be shot illegally when this shielded girl entered and guarded him. She then introduced herself as "Annelotte".

: Certainly, and it seems that I shall be Topaz's next opponent.

*She swings her sword and takes aim at Topaz before pressing the tip in the ground in front of her feet. She then places both hands on the hilt as well, looking up with noble stature.*

Just one question, Annelotte. Why are you fighting for Aldra?

: I was expecting you to ask if I would allow you to do a blog on me...

: Darn it Topaz! Can't you do anything right? (Besides steal my heart-er, oh no! The palpitations!)

Okay, so there's THAT too, but I really want to know. Don't you know that Aldra is planning something evil?

: I do. Though I do not know the details.

I suppose that I don't either. But even so why are you helping the villain?

: I am not helping her.

I'm pretty sure that trying to defeat, kill, or steal my power would help her.

: You do have a fair point, but I did not join in order to face you.

What are you talking about.

: Do you not remember what the prize in this competition is?

Since I'm mostly forced into it, I can't recall.

: Koto, would you like to explain?

*Topaz and Annelotte turn to Koto, who lets out a yawn as she tosses the microphone. She looks quite bored, so she jumps when Annelotte speaks her name.*

: W-what?!

Hey, you shouldn't be falling asleep!

: Not my fault you keep being boring. Between your “plot” and “blog” there's way too much talking for my tastes. I bet the crowd agrees to with me, right? RIGHT?!

*The crowd is silent.*

: FINE! I'll tell you about the prize. Even if you've seen it for yourself, I think. The winner gets to challenge Aldra in honorable combat.

So that's why you're here!

: Precisely. I am only competing to face Aldra at the very end.

Well then, seems that we have similar goals in mind. But I doubt that you'll step down for me to take the path to Aldra.

: Of course not. I'll fight you with everything I have. I have a reputation to keep up.

You are a noble and honorable woman, Annelotte. Though I have been fighting a lot of those lately. It's as if Aldra had planned out a theme for this month...

: I'm sure it's just coincidence and she was collecting skilled warriors.

That's probably true. But speaking of which, how about I get on with the blog?

: It'll be no trouble at all. Go right ahead.

: *Sighs* Fine, I GUESS I can wait until you get done with this stupid thing.

: And do not worry, I won't attack Topaz until he has finished and prepared. There is very little he could say that would anger me.

: You'd be surprised...

: Wait.. Does that mean?

: Yes, you are free to go.

: WOOHOO! I'm going to take a break. I'll be back soon, once I take a short nap!

I wish I could take a short nap...

: Don't be lazy, Topaz! Your life isn't that busy!

I meant more so that I'd recover my HP, like in video games.

: Life isn't video games, Topaz. That doesn't work!

Oh, and a good massage from a tanned elf DOES?

*Riri facepalms and sighs.*

: .... Just get on with the blog...

Today's girl is:

Queen's Blade

Hey, why don't you use your last name?

: I'm not sure. I guess I don't want to wave my noble line in peoples faces. That or they want me to be like the other girls and not mention it, like with Leina and her family.

Fair point.

==Meanwhile, in the VIP room.==

*Aldra and Menace barely take a seat before the blog begins.*

: I had not expected that the concession stands would take so long. We barely made it here in time for Topaz's blog.

: Indeed. I even intimidated all the other customers to allow us to cut in line. Remind me to fire those employees.

: With pleasure.

: Now, let us await the blog-HEY!

: What is it, my mistress?


: Hmm. It seems that she has left the arena. Mayhaps the heat was getting to her?

: The Forge Arena may have blazing infernos, but it should be no hotter than usual. Not that it would not be impressive, but rather if we turned up the flames any more we would have difficulty seeing the battles. All I know is that we shall have to PUNISH Koto for leaving the arena.

: Of course.

Hair: Annelotte has really pretty hair. It's extremely voluminous and looks very fluffy, and the sides curve in front really cutely. She definitely looks quite glamorous as a result of her fluffy hair, and in back her hair looks nice as it becomes quite wide. Length-wise it's also good, being long without reaching her hips for maximum butt-appeal. She even keeps it flowing which to me is always beautiful, and her sides easily rest on her shoulders, with the tips reaching her chest. Probably the biggest problem is her crown/tiara/helmet in front. Not that it looks bad, as it matches the rest of her armor with a nice silver color and I like how interesting it is, but rather because it makes her bangs look really generic. She doesn't even show what I think is the part in front as her helmet hangs down in front. Annelotte's hair color is also pretty, being a mix of either silver or, more likely, purple and white. It matches her silver appearance quite well. That said I still easily prefer Annelotte's player 2 version/demon form as it has a beautiful black color. Mixed with her hair style it looks extremely beautiful, so it's a shame it's not shown off as much. Oh, and her headdress turns gold to match the armor change. Overall not a bad hair style, though blocking of portions is a shame (even if the way she does it is cool).
Grade: A-

Eyes: Annelotte has fairly basic eyes for the series. Sadly like so many girls she seems to have blue eyes, which hurts her score a bit even if I don't mind the color as much as Zettai. The eye shape is also a calming tarame, which while cute doesn't seem to fit with Annelotte's character. Luckily her eyes are MUCH better in her demon form. Not only does she gain a piercing tsurime, looking extremely fierce and dominant, but her eyes also turn red. I used to not like red eyes, but I've certainly seen the appeal recently and it helps that Annelotte's hair changes to black as well. Her eyes just look excellent in that form, which is a shame as again she's not in it a lot. Still it's enough to help out Annelotte's score from being too terrible for being generic here.
Grade: B

Face: Sadly there isn't too much to help Annelotte from being generic here. She's not one of the “cute” Queen's Blade girls and, while not as masculine as Cattleya, she does look a bit manly (though it fits her being a reverse trap). And it's not enough to make her bad-looking either, just slightly generic. Annelotte also seems somewhat mature, at least compared to her followers (though the fact she gets called “Oneesama” helps, perhaps). She does have fair-sized features, including her nose which is a downside. Sadly for once her demon form is a downside. Not because of the pointed elf-like ears, those are fine. The main problem is that she seems to be wearing make-up. The eye shadow I don't mind too much as it brings out her eyes, which as previously stated do look excellent. What I dislike is that her lips gain a blue lipstick-like color to them. I'm not big on lipstick, and the color makes it seem like Annelotte is extremely cold. Overall Annelotte's biggest problem is that she looks very generic among the other Queen's Blade characters.
Grade: B-

Build: Like a good fanservice series should Queen's Blade gives measurements for its girls. Annelotte seems to be 159 cm, which for some reason seems short for her (maybe it's because I'm thinking of her being a TDB; she is only one cm shorter than Tomoe which she looks about equal to). Her three measurements are 86/57/82 so sadly she seems to be bustier but within my reasonable amount of 5 cm. Her waist also doesn't seem too bad either. It is also fortunate that Queen's Blade is probably one of the best franchises for fanservice. As a result Annelotte shows off her butt quite a bit, with a piece of official art even showing off her naked apron behind. And it does look glorious and plump, as all girl butts should. I certainly feel jealous of her phantom steed. Her thighs also look fantastic, as does the rest of her body as well. Her limbs look really sleek, especially considering her strength. I'm not as fond of her “front” shots, such as when she's practicing with Siggy, but I guess I have to accept them (it would be better if she showed her butt more instead). Overall she's quite strong, but the problem is that with her mostly “average” body she really doesn't stand out among all the Queen's Blade characters. Even her demon form isn't different, not even having tattoos or something that would be more interesting (like wings or something). Well, other than a deep purple aura while fighting which looks kinda cool, but still.
Grade: A-

Breasts: Annelotte is more of a chest girl overall. One reason may be that she does have a larger chest with a 4 cm difference (as mentioned prior). Her frontal breast plate also seems quite brittle, breaking quite often and revealing her large breasts. Well, large in theory considering some of the other character in the series. Annelotte seems to be in the “average” area here as well, not being flat but also not having huge lumps either. She's just fairly nice, with a balanced chest against her body shape. She also gets some chest focus as well, but as Queen's Blade isn't a terrible fanservice show (*coughDxDcough*) it's not incredibly focused either so it doesn't get annoying. She also has fairly plain, but not too big, nipples which fit her chest fairly well. Overall her chest is fairly-sized and fairly-shown off, I'd say.
Grade: A-

Clothes: Annelotte has a fairly sizable wardrobe, especially considering that most Queen's Blade characters don't have more than one outfit. She's most well known for her breastplate with open cleavage which is probably a terrible idea, to be fair, but it's similar to Leina's for a cool continuity nod. The breastplate also has a tiara (as mentioned earlier), gauntlets that reach her shoulders or so, and thighhigh boots though sadly the sort with heels. Really, who fights in heels? They look awful, bringing down the entire outfit. The armor is a cool silver, again fitting with Annelotte's hair, and she wears a blue dress under it with big poofy shoulders, a white stripe on the bottom of the skirt, and some golden ornamentation in various places including shoulders and down her stomach. Blue works not just because it's a royal color but looks really great against her silver color (though I guess that's like her blue eyes paralleling her silver hair). Sadly she wears a “cape” in back, covering only past her hips though fortunately she seems to show her butt fairly as mentioned before. Underneath it all she wears boring panties, though they are pink. In demon form her armor instead turns golden and the blue turns a very dark red. The golden color isn't great, but the red looks really amazing especially with her black hair. Her sword, usually silver with a gold hilt, becomes golden as well with a black hilt and red gem. It looks really awesome and fits a “dark sword” as well (though why her personal changes also change her outfit and sword makes less sense the more you think about it...). Oh, and Annelotte also wears a choker with a horse's emblem that she uses to summon her phantom steed Ambrosius.
Of course, despite all that about her normal outfit Annelotte has a few more. As mentioned before she has a great naked apron image (sharing it with Aldra). She also wears a blue bikini, a blue dress, and a white wedding dress-ish dress (the two dresses being very frilly). She attempts to wear the revealing “vibrating armor” as well but she doesn't sync well with it. Annelotte also seems to have a cute white shirt for pajamas, and in the beginning of the OVA she has a royal-looking outfit with pants and looks a lot like a reverse trap. Really, her wardrobe is fairly strong but the bad hip cape and heels, not to mention not wearing her alternate outfits too much does keep her from an A.
Grade: B+

Personality: Annelotte is a great character, at least for my tastes. She's an honorable knight and I mean that literally, she was part of the Kreutz Knight Corps before they were attacked. Incidentally she was also the daughter of Margra Kreutz. Annelotte seems to be the last remaining one, having escaped a great explosion thanks to a nameless soldier pushing her away and into a river. She was also raised to take the throne, meaning that she was also raised as a man (though why I have no clue as this series has shown that females are perfectly capable). Even though she looks obviously female this apparently doesn't translate as she's still called “Oniisama” by her friends and gets groped to make sure (she prefers “Oneesama”). That said Annelotte is very much an “older sister” archetype, being more mature and a good leader. Hilariously even Siggy calls her “Oneesama” even if Siggy is older than Annelotte. Even her name “Anne” sorta sounds like “Ane”, which is Japanese for “older sister”. Fits as, well, she IS an older sister, but that's a tale for another girl...
But anyway Annelotte is really quite great. She's an older sister-like reverse trap and my favorite from Rebellion. However, I do see a lot of Leina in her and I can see how some people can interpret Annelotte as “boring” as well, she's not exciting like LunaLuna for example. She's still extremely charismatic though. I also will say that having Aya Endou be Annelotte was a perfect fit, and in general she's a great girl for my tastes. Oh, and before I forget she likes sweets, dislikes heights, and her hobby seems to be horseback riding.
Grade: A-


: Something the matter, Aldra-sama? Are you feeling ill?

: No, I just had a shiver up my back for some reason...

Libido: Annelotte doesn't show too much libido. She's a noble knight. That said she has a LOT of yuri options. Nearly every girl that she meets and gets to join her army has a somewhat crush on Annelotte. The yuri is especially strong between Annelotte and LunaLuna, though Yuit calling her “Oniisama” is also quite attractive. There was also the OVA where Annelotte trains with Alleyne so seeing two of my favorite QB characters sounds really good to me. Apparently in the books she also trains with Tomoe, but this isn't shown in the anime as of yet. Speaking of “training” she also works on sacred poses with Siggy in one of the specials, and considering how close they get-well, let's just say that the two are nearly kissing, but not with their lips... Annelotte also has shipping official art with Aldra (which is nice due to a certain reason), Liliana (though sadly in a “defeated foe” way), and Mirim, meaning she has a LOT of options.
Grade: B

Age: Annelotte's age is unknown. It's likely that she's the same age as Leina in the original series (as there's a time skip between the previous seasons and Rebellion, I think). I will say that all the girls that follow Annelotte do call her “Oneesama” so that's some added appeal here perhaps.
Grade: B

Total Grades: 80
Average score: 8.9
Final Grade: B+

And that's the blog for this week.

*Crowd cheers.*

: I am not sure if that is a good score or not...

: It's not THAT impressive, but it's not a bad score. I guess.

No need to be tsundere just because she got the same score you did.


*Ririchiyo sticks her tongue out at Topaz from the sides of the arena.*

But indeed, you did do quite well. You're even the highest scoring Queen's Blade character for me.

: Though I have a feeling that we'll have to blog about more as the year goes on...

*As they finish their conversation Koto runs back to the arena floor. She's wearing a cap with a chibi Aldra face on it, holding a banner with “Colosseum Rules!” on it, and in the other hand has a hot dog.*

: I'm back! Did I miss anything?

Yes, you missed the entire battle. What do you think?

: No need to be snippy, jeez!

: I think that Topaz isn't being snippy, he's just trying too hard to make a joke. Like always.

Sometimes my jokes are good!

: Key word being “SOMETIMES”!

: Arguing couple aside-

: WE ARE NOT A COUPLE! *grumble grumble*

*She sits down on a nearby chair, mumbling to herself.*

: Anyway, we are just preparing to battle. Are you ready, Topaz?

Hold on, let me activate my special ability.

*Topaz thinks long and hard about Centorea, giggling slightly at the wording before becoming serious.*

*Topaz has gained the power of Centorea. He inspects himself.*

Hmmm, I don't seem any different.

: Just be glad that you didn't grow a horse-butt!

Agreed. Though I wonder...

*Topaz opens his pants, looking down into them.*

Nope, I guess I didn't get THAT...

: TOPAZ, I thought you were better than making THAT kind of “horse joke.”

What are you talking about? I was thinking I'd get her bow, but I only have her lance and sword. How am I going to use Centaur Arrow at THIS rate?

: What were you thinking of?

: N-nothing!

*Ririchiyo blushes.*

: Just get on with the battle!

: I agree!

*Koto has mustard all over her face, the hot dog having been consumed.*

: I am ready.

As am I.

: Well then, let's get this MURDERFEST underway!

*Crowd cheers.*

*Annelotte makes the first move, drawing her sword as she lunges at Topaz. He attempts to leap back, but instead falls backward though he still avoids her swing. She then attempts to slam her sword down, but Topaz is able to crawl between her legs.*

: Would you look at that? Annelotte already has Topaz on the ropes! Not literally, this isn't wrestling. Let's hope that Topaz didn't find a string like last time, I want my battles to have some more bloodshed to them!

*Annelotte continues her onslaught, but Topaz's avoidance seems a lot slower than in the prior battles. He's already panting.*

: I told you that more exercise would be good!

It's not that... It's as if-*pant pant*-I'm suddenly-*pant* much heavier...

: Oh no! You got Centorea's great fat weight!

I don't think it's that!

*Topaz continues to barely evade Annelotte's attacks. Eventually he even takes out Centorea's sword, but his actions are easily predicted by Annelotte.*

My body hasn't changed, but it's more like I'm weighed down by something else...

: It must be all of Centorea's equipment, it's too heavy for your weakling body!

Huh, you'd expect that I'd get her strength with her weapons. But I guess having her horse backside helps her carry more.

: Encumbrance rules are silly with quadrupeds!

: Do not get distracted and put your guard down, Topaz! It would be wise if you would remember that!

*Topaz turns and sees Annelotte diving at him. He somehow swings at her in time, but she blocks the blade with the shield and it rolls off the said shield.*

: See? I have more equipment as well!

True, but don't count me out just yet!

*Topaz swings at Annelotte.*

: What's this? Has Topaz gained the upper hand?! WOW! Maybe he'll defeat an opponent for once!

: You're too slow.

*She easily blocks the blow with the shield. She then presses against the sword, sending it flying from Topaz's hands. The sword dissipates as it leaves his hands.*

: Looks like it's your loss-

Don't put your guard down!

*Topaz brings out Centorea's lance, and even though Annelotte puts up her shield the sheer power Topaz has taken breaks through the shield and knocks her back. She bounces slightly, blood coming out of a pierced wound in her torso.*

: WOW! Now THIS is what I was expecting from a Colosseum battle! Go on, finish her off Topaz!

I'd rather not “finish” her, though... Why don't you could start the countdown?

: What countdown? You either have to finish her or push her off the arena floor. Don't chicken out now!

That's unfortunate, hope I can move her without hurting her too much more.

: And why would THAT be?

*Annelotte starts standing up, propped against her sword. She seems wounded but still in fighting condition.*

Y-you're still...

: It will take more than a single attack to put me down for the count. Besides...

*Even if I'm lazy and the image does not show it, Annelotte enters her demonic form. Her hair turns black and her eyes red, and her armor turns golden.*

: Now you're in deep trouble! Come forth: Ambrosius!

*A phantom steed is created.*

: Oh no! Not more horses!

: Oh man! Did you get all that folks? After receiving a heavy hit, Annelotte is fighting back harder than ever. She even summoned her horse-eh? Is that legal?

: As long as it is not another character I will allow it.

: Well then, seems we got a quick reply from our Majesty Aldra-sama. Go right ahead and get your revenge on Topaz!

: With pleasure!

*Topaz backs up an takes a heavy gulp. Annelotte then charges, her sword pointed at Topaz. He looks around and notices he's still holding onto the lance. He somehow digs the point into the ground and leaps up with all his strength. He vaults right into Annelotte, knocking her off her horse with his heavy equipment weight. The two brush themselves up as the stand, with the horse disappearing now that Annelotte has fallen off the saddle.*

: So it's a Spear-battle you're wanting! No wonder you had the advantage over me... But I shall end this!

*Annelotte gets out a lance of her own and runs on foot towards Topaz. However, he leaps up again, using all his strength to jump, and lands on the smooth spearhead. This launches Annelotte off the floor and she hits the wall with a hard slam. Ririchiyo runs over to her.*

: It's alright! She's just knocked out!

: Well, I can't say that wasn't an exciting battle. Right, y'all?

*Crowd cheers. Meanwhile, a conversation is started in the VIP room.*

: How unfortunate. I was quite hoping that Annelotte would be victorious. Topaz surely has some superb luck...

: He does seem quite fortunate. But I think Annelotte underestimated him and that lead to her downfall.

: I am sorry that I have picked so many poor choices.

: No, no. This might make for an interesting next battle.

: Can you please explain, Aldra-sama?

: Since Annelotte has a demon form it's possible that Topaz, using his mimicry ability, will activate his demon form on the next girl. Then we can have a better idea of how powerful he is.

: You are a genius and see the good in even losses.

: Thank you. But do not forget to contact that Koto. We need to share a few good “words” before the next battle...

*Back at the arena.*

Thank you, thank you.

: Right! And with the defeat of Annelotte we only have one challenger. Luckily she just got here too, and I have no idea who she could be either.

Wait, am I having the battle immediately?

: Not even enough time to hit select a couple times? Er, I mean bandage Topaz up....

: It is Aldra's orders! She also says that I have to meet with her soon. Er, I hope it's not for anything bad... Oh, here the next competitor comes!

*A mysterious, eerie figure enters the arena. She seems to be decked out in a full black suit of armor, and walks onto the arena floor.*

???: Are you the one challenging me?

Er, um, I guess?

???: So you are the human that has come to destroy all the monsters?!

Well, I did beat up a half-demon.

: And stripped a tengu.

: And defeated a centaur.

???: I KNEW IT! You humans are all alike, destroying those that are different from yourself.

W-wait... No... It can't be...

???: What? Do you recognize me? I am not surprised...

*She takes off her helmet.*

Posted by emperortopaz | Jun 16, 8:36 AM | 0 comments
June 9th, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-ninety-third week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*The crowd is cheering as the blog begins.*

: Looks like the crowd knows what time it finally is! That's right, it's time for another bloodbath! Er, battle, but I sure hope that it's a bloody one. For those who were out getting concessions I'll catch you up. It's June, and that means that Emperortopaz has once again entered Aldra's Colosseum competition. Last week he was cut up by Setsuna Sakurazaki, though somehow he was able to strip her and thus win. It's bogus, I know, but let's hope that this battle will be much fiercer. You see, Topaz has to defeat the mighty Centorea Shianus in battle!

*The crowd continues to cheer.*

Am I really needed for reviews anymore?

: You should be glad that she's doing that for you. I thought you were lazy!

Good point! Thanks for that, Koto!

: Anytime! Be sure to repay me by having a great battle!

But where are we going to find one of those?!

: Perhaps thy maiden means thy combat betwixt myself and thou.

Considering my previous track record I think that's asking a bit much of me...

: Don't beat yourself up about that, Topaz!

: Right, that's Centorea's job. Now, before the audience starts falling asleep let's begin the fi-

The Blog! Good point, Koto.

: Thou should not interrupt, Sir Topaz. And I doth not believe that I gave thy permission for this “blog” of yours. I do not even understand...

I'm just going to talk about you on the internet. Like what happened with Setsuna.

: I see. Though I do not wish to have our battle finish in such a fashion.

: Same!

: Agreed, it was boring.

I make no promises. But moving onto the blog, it seems-

*Centorea stomps her hoof, making a loud “Clop”.*

: Still though, I do not believe I have given permission.

I thought you were alright by not objecting.

: It would not pain thou to ask.

True. But I was guessing that you would just say “Neigh”.

: I would not refuse that quickly. Doth thou think I am that adamant?

: I'd make a Pokémon nature joke, but it seems that joke already went over Centorea's head. And that's saying something considering how much she's towering over Topaz.

Yes, you could say that she's on a high horse...

: Topaz! Stop FOALing around-grr, now you've got ME doing that!

: I do not appreciate such banter. If thou continue such escapades, I shalt attack thou without allowing your “blog”.

: Quick! Make lots of puns! Um, er... What are under a tired horse's eyes-SADDLEBAGS! What do horses wear on their heads-Ten-GALLOP hats!

: HEY!

Look, even Centorea is doing it! Hay is for horses and all that.

: That's not funny!

Aww, I apologize for making fun of your lower half. I didn't mean for you to get such a long face.

: Topaz! Stop that this instant!

In all fairness the last one was unintentional. But I shall stop such horseplay right now.

*Centorea's eye twitches and she unsheathes her sword. She then charges at Topaz and swings. She nearly hits him as he was off-guard, sending him across the arena. He lands safely, though he did take 20 damage.*


A-alright. Don't worry. I'm done now. Man, that was like getting hit by a Nine-Handicap Level Nine Ganondorf. But enough about silly challenges, let's get on with the blog.

: A wise decision.

: Aww man. I was just getting into the battle! Can't we have that first?

But if Centorea leaves after being beating she won't be able to hear my thoughts.

: In addition it also means I can punish sir Topaz immediately if he doth say something offensive or embarrassing.

When have I ever embarrassed a girl in a blog before?

: Almost every time?

: I have a highlight reel from last time, if you're interested.

No need, but let's get going as...

: *sigh* Not again... Why does this boring thing always have to happen?

: I am quite interested in thy opinions, but doth not anger me with thou's words or thy will be in a world of hurt.

*Centorea takes a seat, positioned as other horses would.*

Well then, I guess it's time to pony up!

: Don't make me put you out to pasture!

: Stop making jokes like that, Topaz. You're just barely in stable condition!

Hair: Centorea has quite pretty hair. It is blonde, but it's also more of a golden blond and reminds me a lot of the color of hay or wheat which sort of fits considering she is a centaur. I do prefer darker colors, but I wouldn't call Centorea's hair a bad color either. Her tail color is also the same, which is a nice touch. She usually keeps her hair up in a fairly slender ponytail, much like a lot of swordgirls. Length wise her hair reaches her “lower body”, which would approximately be her hips. Her sides are quite long, reaching her chest though only the upper part. Her bangs are a bit of a mess, with a small bump and most of her bangs fanned out to the left. This also leaves her with a long middle bang that reaches her nose. Centorea does have a few other hair styles, including twintails in a certain disguise and having her hair down to comb in one of the specials, but most of the time her hair is up in a ponytail. And I just realized that pun... Anyway, we can't forget about Centorea's unusual ears either. She has horse ears, meaning they stick out rather far (similar to elf ears, though they seem to have hair on them). Overall Centorea does well, but her poor bangs do hurt and while it doesn't look awful I do like darker colors of hair.
Grade: A-

Eyes: Centorea does have blue eyes, though at least it's a bit more interesting with the other girls having different colors. Plus I think she has some European blood in her, possibly, so that might explain being a blue-eyed blonde. Anyway her eyes are pretty, like a lot of the cast and have a nice hue and shade to them. Centorea has a slight tsurime, which is good, but her eyes are also fairly narrow so it's harder to tell.
Of course, we can't move on without talking about Centorea in glasses. Yes, she wears them as part of a disguise, and they're a nice under-frame version too which look nice. While not a major scene it still got an official image, which is nice. In addition, the mangaka also drew an image on Twitter of Centorea cosplaying as characters her VA has. One of the two was Baker, so while not officially canon it was nice to see her cosplay as a meganekko.
Grade: B+

Face: While you wouldn't expect Centorea to have an amazing face, she really does. Most of the time she has a really stern, but not actually angry or mean, face. But when she's flustered she's simply amazing. Really, there's this one scene where her face turned bright red and that was one of my favorite moments as she looked so cute. She also has a few silly emotions, such as when she had a carrot that she especially enjoyed. That said, she does have fair-sized features, including her nose on occasion, which is a negative. Also her face curves fairly nice, but her chin is a bit more pointed than I'd like (or at least more than I'd expect). Overall Centorea has an amazing face with some problems.
Grade: B+

==Up in the VIP chamber ==

: How dare Centorea allow Topaz to blog her first. It fills me with anxiety awaiting the battle and, I am hopeful, Topaz's doom.

: Have more faith in your minion. After all, do you not think that she shall defeat Topaz to rescue her feathered ally?

: That is a good point. I shall hope that she is as noble as I expected.

: Yes, yes. And do not forget...

*Aldra spins a glass of wine before taking a drink.*

: Waiting only allows the taste of victory to be much sweeter.

: Your wisdom and intelligence always causes me to be in awe, Aldra-sama.

: Ufufu.. But I do wish that the battle would commence quickly. Though I may have to visit the little queen's room...

*She gets up and goes to the restroom.*

Build: Now we get to the bad part. Not that centaurs are bad or anything, but much like Miia Centorea's odd and unusual body does hurt her here. It's just so removed from my tastes it doesn't look great. Unfortunately we don't have a length or height, and Centorea herself refuses to let her weight get out. Kinda odd that the newly introduced characters have more accurate measurements, which is a shame for Centorea. Going by D&D logic the centaurs tend to be about 7 feet tall and about 2100 lbs which, in metric, makes Centorea about 213 cm tall and nearly 952 kg (wow, no wonder she'd be so concerned). Her three sizes are 103, 61, and- er, well, I guess she only has two sizes. The reason Centorea doesn't have a hip measurement is that it's difficult to understand what her hips are. Are they her entire horse lower half? Or are they just her back legs? I guess this would be a “if dogs wore pants what would they look like”-type of deal. I just don't enjoy her lower half, and the less I think about her silly last name's “namesake” the better. Her tail is cool, though. She has also had a few silly scenes involving her lower half getting in the way, such as bashing the lead with it, getting it stuck in a closing door, breaking a faucet with it, and breaking both a squishy chair (in the manga) and an exercise ball (in the specials). She also allows the lead to ride her on occasion, meaning on her back of course though this made him into her master due to centaur customs. Her top speed seems to be 60 km/hour as well. I suppose that I should mention her presumably high strength (she can lift both Mero and Miia with one arm each), and even though she's a large creature it's wasted by not having any additional reach.

: Stop making D&D jokes, your reader won't recognize them. Besides, the racial hit die make centaur a terrible creature to play as.

Fine fine. Anyway, while there's nothing “wrong” with Centorea's horse lower half. However, between that, missing out on her hip measurements, and well as lacking any sort of height she could never have done well here. Oh, and in an imagine spot Centorea thinks of being pregnant, but oddly enough it's in her “human” half which biologically shouldn't happen (I guess it's for the audience's sake, but it seems really poorly designed). And that's not even counting a deeper problem....
Grade: D

Breasts: Centorea has a very massive chest. As said before, her bust size is 103 and her cup size is I. That said, those are just what Centorea says, and she's embarrassed by her large size so she might be lying. That's possible as she has broken through no less than 3 different bras, including one that Papi and loliSuu both fit their heads in the cup of. As a result she doesn't wear a bra, so of course this means that she bounces around like crazy. Especially in her introduction where she bounces around for at least than five whole minutes, though in general Centorea gets a LOT of fanservice forced on her large chest. Granted as mentioned before they at least try to show off her horse side too, but that's not taken sexually at all. It's especially bad as it seems that at times her whole character revolves around having a large chest. And while she's the bustiest of the main cast she's only the fourth in the series (Okay, it's understandable that she's below her mother and the giantess-ish, but the series really didn't have to add a literal COW either). This show is not subtle about breasts, which definitely gets annoying at times. I think that in the fan-made spin off 4koma series she even teams up with Tio and the other busty girls to complain directly to the creator about how tiring and obnoxious having large breasts are (though it might be an official omake, I can't be sure).

: Most unusual. I thought mine bosom was to thine tastes.

Things change. But don't worry, I do like your large chest. It's extremely attractive and I can see why it's treated as your charm point. Even if Miia's explanation of your bust being large because you would have to feed rather large calves bogus, the fact that you would count as a “large” humanoid does give you a better excuse. Just not to the extremes that you're put through. I also appreciate that you show your bare breasts, though your nipples are large. They are well designed in the manga with a nice shading effect, though a shame the anime doesn't follow and gives you rather generic nipples that are even larger I think. You also “poke” out of your shirts quite a bit. I also have to say that there was an official sketch in the books with Centorea keeping a carrot between her chest which was a nice fauxzuri tease too. Overall her chest is attractive but I'd prefer Centorea to not be defined by her large breasts and have such fanservice forced every time she has a chapter focused on her.
Grade: C+

Clothes: Centorea has a few nice outfits. Usually, and the outfit she's most known for, is a sleeveless ribbed sweater with collar and a red handkerchief or black necktie around the neck. On bottom she wears a large black skirt which hides her lower half pretty well which she seems to keep on with a belt around her waist. That said the shirt could stand to be thicker as it seems like Centorea keeps bursting out of it (not without reason, but it happens too often to be coincidence). She also owns a full suit of armor that looks rather neat, and on the character song CD she wears a more breastplate-looking version with gauntlets and pauldrons though with a tight black undershirt underneath and a cool blue “blanket” decoration on her horse half (I know it's not a blanket but I don't know enough about ceremonial horsewear to know a better name). She seems to sleep in pajamas with frilly cleavage, even if she doesn't sleep that much and I imagine it's more for decoration. She also wears an apron over her normal clothes when cooking and some other outfits include a Suu-created waitress disguise, a kimono, a wedding dress, and what seems to be a sports bra and other exercise outfit in the online game. She also has a dark blue bikini though she needs one that fits her chest better and one of the few excuses I can see for wearing a pareo (Centorea is a bit embarrassed about having her lower half seen). She also wears a “one-piece” swimsuit that she borrows, which she also explains that she doesn't like her horse front shown even if her “parts” are in the back half as it still looks like she's not wearing anything from the waist down from the front. As said before the author did put Centorea in VA cosplay including both Baker and Petra, but that's not in the series proper. Finally, we can't forget the fact that Centorea has a lot of weapons. She's mostly identified with a sword, even if it's fake, but she has a great amount including lances and bows and is skilled with all of them.
Grade: B

*Aldra returns.*

: I have returned, so inform me of what has happened.

: Not much, I am afraid. Topaz has still not completed his blog as of this time.

: Blast it! I was hoping that he would be getting to the battle already!

: Do not worry. That time seems to be approaching.

*Menace glances at Aldra's hands. They seem to be covered in oil, grease, and blood.*

: ALDRA-SAMA! Are you alright?

: What nonsense are you speaking of?

: Your hands, they look far too damaged to only be from a washroom!

: I had some... BUSINESS to take care of. But I ask of you, drop it.

: But I see blood!

: It is NOT mine. You do not have to worry. In fact, it would be helpful if you forgot all about it.

: B-but...


: Fine...

*The spirit inside Aldra speaks to her.*

???: I too am curious about this “work” you could be doing. You're not doing something to compromise my plan, are you?

: You do not need to concern yourself. I am merely preparing a “back-up” if necessary...

???: What is THAT supposed to mean?

: Back-up? What does that mean?

: You were not supposed to hear that. Forget all about this conversation!

*Aldra's shouting surprises Menace so much she takes a step back. Aldra is then concerned with her minion's dejection and starts a new conversation.*

: You know. I do have faith in you Menace.

: You do?

: Yes, the warriors you have arranged have all been quite powerful. But I must ask, you DID prepare four, correct?

: I did, Aldra-sama.

: Then why have I only met the three?

: Ah yes. Well, I shall only say that she has had quite a trip from a long-forgotten land.

: I see, but do you have a name for this warrior?

: Of course, her name is-

Personality: Centorea seems to be a fairly standard honor blade, though unlike a lot she has blonde hair instead of black. This kinda makes her seem like Saber, and people were even saying that Saber's VA should do Centorea if an anime is made. That said Natsuki Aikawa, a relatively minor VA, took over Centorea. She does a great job, though sadly the subs weren't great with her old speak. She also has a couple of nice character songs that I enjoy as well.
Anyway, back to Centorea. She joins the harem when Kimihito, who she calls “Lord” or something similar (might be “Master” but that seems more like Suu's territory), saves her from a mugger as she was spooked and had her sword taken from her. Centorea was so smitten by his bravery that she became his knight and now protects him. She's sensible and level-headed, though not always honest with her feelings as she puts up a “wall” between those who she doesn't trust as she is bound by honor which gets better of her reason. Centorea is sort of a big eater, fitting her large body, but she mainly eats vegetables with her favorite seeming to be carrots. She does not eat meat, and while not as bad a cook as the more “carnivorous” characters her food seems bland and tastes like the ingredients. She has more taste buds than a human, which explains that. Centorea also loves Japan, turning her room into a Japanese-style tatami mat room without much furniture. She also seems to play a lot of RPGs and watches anime, though this isn't shown in the series (just the information she has learned through it). Centorea is also from a noble family, which explains her last name, but her father was also a human which is something she didn't learn until her mother told her. Overall she's a great honor blade with a lot of nice little quirks that make her different (and I don't mean just her lower half). I'll also add that she's usually called “Cerea” but I figured I'd use her full name as a sign of respect through the blog.
Grade: A-

Libido: While not as open as Miia or as domiant as Rachnera Centorea still has her fair share of libido moments. She's likely one of the more “pure”-hearted of the harem, treating him as if he was her master (in the nobility way, not the master/servant way). She may also have the highest self-control as she was at least able to explain the affects of the full moon before falling into the high libido the moon gives them. She also gets hypnotized by a devil/succubus and tries to take the lead right after as well. That said, she mainly uses her chest to tempt him when under these effects, which while understandable goes with what I said earlier about her chest being far too forced into scenes. That said she has shown a lot of love towards Kimihito, fantasizing about them both running away together and raising a family together. Overall she does well here.
Grade: B+

Age: Centorea's age is unknown, though she's likely the same age as Miia and the other girls which probably places her at college age or so. I can't be sure, though. What I do know is that Centorea's birthday is November 28th.
Grade: B

Total Grades: 71
Average score: 7.9
Final Grade: B

: Hmmm... That is an unusual name.

: I do not think we are in any position to say that, especially myself. But I imagine that being underground for so long leaves a lot of outer influences unknown.

: Perhaps-wait!

*Aldra holds out her arm.*

: It seems as though Topaz's blog is finally completed.

*Centorea stands as Topaz finishes.*

So what did you think?

: Overall I do not have a problem...

*She brandishes a large lance.*

: But do not think thy words did not anger me! Thou hath embarrassed mine honor and-

Hey, I think it's the series that focuses too much on showing your “honor”...

: Enough with such slander! Have at you!

*Centorea charges at Topaz, who rolls out of the way.*

: ALRIGHT! We're finally getting to the battle!

: Be save Topaz! Especially because she seems to have both Trample AND Piercing!

Yo dawg, I heard you liked dealing damage against defending creatures, so now you can deal damage while dealing damage!

: People won't get that sort of card-based humor. (Er, though I guess I started it. Stupid Ririchiyo, stupid Ririchiyo).


*Centorea charges. Topaz once again avoids her lance, but gets kicked by one of her hoofs. The kick sends him flying again, dealing 40 damage. When he stands back up he has a silly imprint of a hoof on his face.*

: Wow! That looked like it HURT! Awesome!

More like Ow-some! And believe me, it did hurt.

: Here I come again!

*She charges at Topaz.*

: That charge looks quite SPIRITED!

How awful, and she has a lance so it will do triple damage!


*She slams down her lance, barely missing Topaz.*

That wasn't a sword at all!

: Thus the “secret” part, doth thou not understand?

: Careful! Centorea may have been ordinary before, but it seems that she's more Resolute than we expected!

*Centorea swings a few more times, but after avoiding them all Topaz seems to be breathing heavily.*

: Thou movements are starting to slow, thou must be getting tired from the battles!

Maybe a little... But I have many more abilities that you haven't seen!

: I disbelieve thy attempt at intimidation.

*Centorea gets out a second lance. Each one is about as large as Topaz is, yet she can carry it in one hand with ease.*

: Now THIS is the proper way to intimidate someone!

*She starts running towards Topaz, who is backed into the corner. He looks to the left to see her spear, the right to see another, and under Centorea's centaur body to see four hoofs moving quickly. Every way looks dangerous.*

: Thou shalt not escape my grasp THIS time!

: She's right! That's a perfect way to negate Topaz's constant evasion, to make sure he has no way to escape! Alright! Might we see the end of Topaz right here?!

: I-I sure hope not...

*Time seems to act in slow motion as Topaz's thoughts spin through his head. Of his errors and mistakes, his great successes and achievements... All the way to Setsuna's blog last time-wait... Setsuna... Setsuna.... Topaz recalls the power of Setsuna!*

*Just as Centorea is about to strike Topaz he leaps upward. He then hovers around a bit on two large white wings, while the horselady slides out of control.*

Look Riri! I have wings too!

: Good job, I guess. I just hope that we won't be sponsored by any sort of energy drink now.

: WOW! Just when we think that Topaz is down for the count he springs back up! What a miracle worker!


: Wait! This seems unfair!

: To point that out would be the thing that is unfair. Remember, Setsuna also was able to fly without punishment. But....

*Aldra concentrates hard.*

: No, not at all.

: What is it, Aldra-sama?

: I was measuring Topaz's energy. It did spike up from normal, though unlike his “Mazoku” form this is much weaker. It must only be the Mimicry ability.

: I see, but what is the difference between his forms?

: Topaz's normal energy is unimportant. Rather high for a human, but not outside any radical ranges. Seems that this form is only fifteen percent, which is still out of a normal human's level but nothing compared to his “Mazoku” form.

: How much powerful is that?

: It doubles his normal power.

: But that doesn't seem like much.

: On a normal human it does not. But imagine if I were the one wielding such power...

: I see....

*Back at the arena floor.*

: Do not think that taking flight saves thou. I have learned from much research that such creatures are weak against arrows!

*She gets a bow out.*

: Oh no! She's a Silver Knight! Wait, those can't use swords...

Forrest Knight?

: Those can't use lances. I have to say, she's really confusing.

: Thou art the confusing ones! Do you not mean “Ranger”?

What does Ike have to do with this?

: Not that type-Grr, I'll just end it here!

*Centorea draws her bow, aims at Topaz, and fires. However, a cloaked figure runs into the field and intercepts the arrow with a shield.*

: WHAT?!

: HEY! I have to call foul and disqualify Topaz immediately!

: Wait, NO!

: But we had someone else enter the field to his rescue. Such things are illegal!

???: Yes, but Centorea has not moved since she charged at Topaz, correct?

: I haven't, but what does that have-

???: Look at your feet...

: What do you-OH!

*She notices that one of her hoofs had been placed on the ground, outside of the arena.*

: I must have placed it while sliding around for a foothold. My apologies, sir Topaz. It was I that nearly performed an illegal attack on you.

: *Sigh* Once again we have Topaz being the victor. Man, it's getting boring around here. Like if Topaz was a Pink Cure and talking down the villains.

: Hey! Some Pink Cures are cool! And also that one JoJo SNES game was cool too!

: But I must ask, who are thou who would run into danger on another's behalf? That show of nobility is quite honorable.

???: I am glad you asked that. Especially as I seem to be Topaz's next opponent. But it is I-

*The mysterious figure takes off the cloak.*
Posted by emperortopaz | Jun 9, 8:51 AM | 0 comments
June 2nd, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-ninety-second week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*Topaz and Ririchiyo walk into the Colosseum. Specifically the Grand Arena where they had previously fought a powerful foe.*

Well, I'm ready for this competition. Bring it, Aldra!

*Topaz makes a pose, but soon realizes that there's no one there except for the three of them.*

What gives? I was thinking Aldra and the others would have an audience. Like when we fought Melona in April!

: I think that we should be thankful that she hasn't set a trap up. And I don't mean a crossdresser either!

But Momoko told me that there would be the traditional arena battles this month! And we saw such a crowd entering the Colosseum too! If only we had some clue as to what's going on!

*Ririchiyo looks around and sees Momoko sweeping up the side of the arena.*

: Look! There's Momoko! Maybe she knows something!

Great plan!

*The two head over to Momoko.*

Hey Momoko-

: Oh, Hello you two. Sorry if I'm a bit dirty, but after I sorta failed to get you here I got demoted to janitor.

That's unfortunate. Luckily I'm here, so maybe you'll get the job back!

*She lets out a sigh.*

: Actually, that's the only reason I'm still standing. Aldra didn't like me being unable to defeat you, and nearly crystalized me like she did many other people. In fact...

*Momoko looks up at the large clock. It is only about five minutes to the hour.*

: If you don't hurry I'll get crystallized!

: Don't worry. We'll just get a couple of magical Aho Girls to unfreeze you.

She's a peach, not an orange Ririchiyo...

: Oh yeah... (Why didn't I realize that? I feel like an idiot!).

But we're here. Why would Aldra be mad?

: No no no. This is the GRAND arena. You were supposed to arrive at the FORGE arena!

All these new places are so confusing! Like that one Psychic attack that causes confusion... Hmmm... It's on the tip of my tongue...

: Psybeam!

That's it! But getting back to the subject at hand, where is this "Forge Arena"?

: Down the hallway and take the stairs. You can't miss it.

Thanks for the help!

: Think nothing of it. In fact, why don't you take THIS!

*Momoko hands Topaz a peachy sword.*

What? The Momo Kyun Sword?

: The namesake drop?!

: Don't worry. That's just a practice sword. Though it might help you defend against the many weapon users you'll be meeting next.

Sounds ominous, but I'm sure we'll be fine.

: You shouldn't assume that you'll win just because you're a protagonist...

Fair point. But for now we should hurry! Thanks for the sword!

: Good luck!

*Momoko waves as Ririchiyo and Topaz head back into the building. Meanwhile mysterious cloaked figure with a large slender sword wait at the Forge Arena. The Forge Arena seems quite warm, with molten metal and various machine-creations in the background. The crowd up in the stands are speaking among themselves. In the VIP chamber Aldra looks at her large pocket watch. She then turns to Menace, who is standing beside her.*

: Where is that blasted Topaz? He should be here, or we'll have to disqualify him for the competition. And believe me, I did NOT set all this up just to be disappointed!

: Er, I am not sure what could be taking him. Perhaps he is making use of the little boys room?

: He had better hurry up! The time is almost upon us!

*Meanwhile back on the arena floor the announcer girl is waving herself from the heat.*

: What's happening? Are we going to have the battle or not?!

???: Patience.

: I'd love to have some patience, but if Topaz will forfeit the match if he doesn't show up in... Oh my-THIRTY SECONDS! Twenty-nine... Twenty-eight...

*The crowd starts to chant as the number gets smaller.*

Crowd: Twenty.. Nineteen...

*Aldra also does the same, watching the second hand on her watch get closer to the hour.*

: Fifteen... Fourteen...

: Topaz had better hurry! Nine... Eight.. Seven...


*Topaz makes a running leap from the stands. He falls facefirst onto the arena, rolling a bit but eventually getting to his feet. He takes 20 damage, but, limping slightly, he gives a thumbs-up.*

I'm ready!

*Just as Topaz finishes saying those words Aldra's watch alarm goes off. She turns it off and Menace lets out a sigh of relief.*

: You are lucky that Topaz showed up in time...

: Of course, Aldra-sama.

*Meanwhile, Riri leans on the railing on the side of the arena.*

: I told you not to do anything dangerous before the battle!

It's alright, I made it in time!

: Wow! That was cutting it quite close. I bet the audience was on the edges of their seats waiting!

Sorry, I was given poor directions. Or actually, no, I wasn't told to come to the Forge Arena in the first place!

: That's really interesting-NOT!

What, are you from the Nineties?

: Well that IS when my show aired... But enough of that. Let's see who the first girl Topaz will face this month!

*The mysterious swordwielder throws off their cloak.*

: It is I, Setsuna Sakurazaki!

*Topaz gasps*

But what are you doing here?! I thought that Aldra would only recruit villains!

*Setsuna clenches her fist.*

: Do know that I would not normally sully my blade with riffraff such as yourself. But Aldra has taken something precious from me, and I need it returned immediately.

Uh-huh. So she took Konoka.

*She flusters.*

: W-what are you talking about?! I never mentioned her name at all! D-don't be making things up.

Totally Konoka.

: It's really obvious.

: Even I can see that...

: Anyway, it seems that you are ready for combat.

*Setsuna unsheathes her blade.*

: I hope you are ready for a proper battle.

: YES! I've been waiting for a good battle for a while now! Let's see lots of blood and guts!

I'd rather not.. In fact, I'd rather start my blog first.

: *sigh* This thing again? Why can't you do this backstage?

Because the arena battles allow me to reach a wider audience.

: He has a captive audience of more than one, is what he's really saying.

: I have been warned by Menace to not allow you to do a blog on me. But...

*She returns her sword to her sheath.*

: If you truly have some type of magic in your words I'd like to see it for myself. Do whatever this "blog" is to me. I am not afraid.

Well then, sounds like..

: Sigh... Well, I guess this means I can take a break for a while.

: No. If Topaz betrays my trust in him you should be ready to commentate. Though I imagine that he would not survive the first blow.

That's not very reassuring, but here goes Setsuna's blog!

Hair: Setsuna has really beautiful black hair. Usually she keeps her hair up in a big, spiky ponytail on her left side, but there are rare occasions where it's down. Sadly in the main series it only reaches her shoulders, which isn't too bad and gives her a cool boyish-look or so. In the Negima?! series she has much longer hair, reaching her waist when down and I prefer that version. Her bangs are blunt-but only on the right side. Because of Setsuna's ponytail, though even when it's down, the left side of her bangs are parted to the side. This makes her hair look a little lopsided; I don't mind when the ponytail is in, but it doesn't look as good without it. It's also said that Setsuna is an albino and her hair is only black because she dyes it. This would be unfortunate if it were true, but I don't think we see her without black hair so it likely isn't accurate. Oh, and she also wears cat ears in the magical world arc and bunny ears during the school festival, both looking pretty cute.
Grade: B+

Eyes: Setsuna has fairly nice eyes. They start out with a strong tsurime, but as she becomes more relaxed so do her eyes. It's unfortunate as I do like sharper eyes, but I also like seeing her character grow too. Negima?! and that other, lesser season don't help as in it her eyes are a bit more tsurime, sorta like how they were in the books at that point. Don't get me wrong, her eyes do retain a bit of slope which is nice. Her eyes are a dark brown color, or at least as far as I can tell. It's a pretty color. I'll also add that when she goes into her winged form her eyes may become red, though as it's a supernatural form I don't mind too much (plus red looks nice with black). Again we have to address the fact that Setsuna may be an albino and she wears contacts to change her eye color. It's a bit more reasonable, but I think it's a more magical method as, like said, her winged form seems to have red eyes. Overall Setsuna does have nice eyes, but her sharp tsurime is missed.
Grade: B

Face: Setsuna has a cute and simple face, much like a lot of Negima characters. Having a small nose also helps her here. Both her emotionless “cool” face and the various cute faces that are more recent look great with her, showing many sides of her personality. Setsuna also seems to have a bit more blush in the SHAFT version so her cheeks seem softer. I will say that she's pretty, but so are a lot of girls in Negima and Setsuna doesn't stand out. Not that she's bad, of course. It's just that she's not spectacular.
Grade: B

Build: Setsuna has a lot of measurements! She's 151 cm tall and weighs 65.6 kg (I'm not sure why there's a decimal either). Her three sizes are 71-52-74, which are quite nice and shows that she's more of a butt girl. Unfortunately I can't think of any significant moments though do know that Negima is a pretty fair as far as that goes. We do see a bit of her buttcrack when she's changing before her and Asuna's battle in the tournament as an example, and there's probably many other places as well. Except in the Xebec anime at least, that seemed to avoid most of the fanservice and they also in general might dislike butts. She's also pretty slender, though I mean that in the best way, and pretty strong despite her lean frame. She also is classified as a traditional Japanese beauty, with pale white skin and very beautiful. She also has nice, if thin, legs. She also has white wings that she hides in the beginning (and whenever it would be convenient) though she's hated in her tribe for that. The reason is that she's a Hanyou, or half-demon (that's a very vague if easier to understand comparison). Though like the girls in the series I'd say that she does look cool and angelic. Setsuna's skin is very beautiful, but she's a bit too lean I'd say. Especially her lower half could use some meat on it, butt included.
Grade: B-

Breasts: Setsuna leans on the “flat” side of the scale. Especially with some of her co-stars. That said she's not perfectly flat either. As said before her chest is 71 cm, and she does have a bit of a curve as well. As a middle school student I'd say she looks about “average” or so. Though as said she's a Japanese beauty and her mostly-flat chest does help out in that regard. It also helps that Setsuna really doesn't mind either, it's good to see a girl that's not concerned here.
Grade: C

Clothes: Setsuna has numerous outfits, and probably many that I've forgotten but I'll try my best to remember them all. First off is the Mahora Academy uniform, which consists of a brown blazer with white shirt underneath, red neck tie and plaid skirt, and short socks. The lack of good legwear is kinda balanced by wearing spats under her skirt, and like many classic sword girls before her she wears a sarashi too (unknown if she wears a fundoshi, though I imagine that it would be hard to hide under spats). She also stops wearing the blazer when it starts becoming summer. While preparing for the school festival Setsuna gets forced into a bunny outfit, becoming embarrassed by being the “only” bunny. Fortunately she's a lot more comfortable wearing a fluffier-looking one with Negi (though it does expose her navel). She, alongside Asuna, wears frilly lingerie as they didn't notice it while dressing and Setsuna herself wears a maid-like outfit over it. Setsuna also wears a samurai outfit in the theater village and a kendo uniform at times. In the Negima?! spin-off she somehow has the chibi form of a crane. She also wears a gym outfit with a white shirt and blue shorts (sadly not even spats). There's also a green maid outfit she wears during her pactio moments with Konoka, another blue-er maid outfit, and when dressing up for a ball Setsuna wears a lovely suit with necktie. As far as bathing suits go Setsuna prefers the classics, wearing a sukumizu (though at one point she wears cat ears and tail for added appeal). She also wears a white one-piece in the SHAFT anime and a green bikini in official art (though she's not showing too much). She also tends to carry around a sword of course, and through Pactios she gains the ability to summon up to 16 short swords or one big, green sword that Konoka can amplify with her magic. Overall there's a lot of sexy outfits, both masculine and feminine-looking, that Setsuna looks amazing in.
Grade: A

Personality: Setsuna gets introduced as a side character, not really doing much of anything. However, as the story goes on she's thought to be a spy for an opposing magical faction. However, it's revealed that she's instead Konoka's bodyguard and childhood friend. However, Setsuna has been keeping away and protecting her in shadows due to an incident where the two of them nearly drowned in a river. While at first she keeps her distance, as the story goes on Setsuna becomes a lot more open with her emotions. Eva even points it out during their fight in the tournament, but Setsuna proves victorious by saying she's stronger BECAUSE she's closer to those that she has to protect now. Sadly it does mean that Setsuna does go from a “cool” emotionless girl to one that shows her emotions more freely, but she still has hints of a more serious personality. I don't mind it as much as the growth is actually shown really well (though the Xebec anime does really skip out on her past, if I remember correctly). I'll also add that Setsuna belongs to the crow tribe specifically though it was translated as “bird tribe” (the kanji seem to be similar, but I wouldn't know for myself). Her white wings were considered a bad omen so she was kicked out.
Setsuna is, of course, a very skilled swordswoman. Her fighting style, Shinmei-ryū, is a reference to Akamatsu's former work Love Hina. She has numerous demon-slaying strikes, though most often they're used to remove clothing. Setsuna also knows some magic, including the ability to use shikigami. She also can make a small chibi version of herself that looks cute. She likes kendo practice and Konoka, and dislikes idle chatter and perverse things. Setsuna is also voiced by Yuu Kobeyashi which does her voice really well. She's also a native of Kyoto, though I'm not sure if she has an accent or not. Overall Setsuna is an extremely wonderful girl that grows very well through the series in mind. Oh, and in the epilogue Setsuna mainly wanders but saves up money for a Cruiser. She also marries in 2017, which “happens” to also be the year that Konoka marries. But more on that in the next area...
Grade: A

Libido: Setsuna's libido really depends on which version you're experiencing. She may have slight yuri moments with Asuna, but that's both a mix of the two being rivals and arriving in the magical world together. She also has shipping scenes with Negi, including one that she promises to protect him when he's in trouble. It's joked that it looks like a love confession, but I could see the two being more like family than romantic. She does give him a good, well, “holding” when she think he's attacking him in the bath. Oh, and Tsukuyomi also has a major crush on Setsuna due to both using the same style of fighting (though Tsukuyomi more has yandere-like glee in fighting her). But that's not what you were expecting, right?
No, the obvious pairing is Setsuna and Konoka. Setsuna has a definite crush on her ojousama. The two are often seen together, and Konoka seems to “innocently” embarrass Setsuna a lot (such as asking if it matters that the two of them can have a Pactio. This involves a deep kiss, and the two DO get one later on in the series). In the Negima?! series this is brought up a lot more, with various eyecatches of Setsuna admiring Konoka. The most obvious scene is when she's staring at her ojou's body and has to go into shade as she's getting “hot”. It's possible that the two were married together, as mentioned before. However, the sequel UQ Holder tends to flip-flop on this issue. At first we were introduced to the lead guy who has a last name of “Konoe” and is related to Negi, but later on we see practically two identical girls to Setsuna and Konoka (Isana and Honoka, respectively). One has to wonder if they were added due to complaints, but having canon grandchildren makes this a pretty awesome yuri pairing.
Grade: B

Age: Setsuna starts the series at 14 and ends up being 15 by the time it ends. That's not too bad of an age, but she is still only in middle school. As additional information her birthday is January 17th of 1989, making the series in 2003. Though who knows, I seem to have trouble keeping track of the time that long-running series start in. Hayate being inconsistent certainly doesn't help either. Also I cannot remember if Setsuna has been mentioned as being alive or dead while the events of UQ Holder are occurring (the series is set in 2086, but Setsuna is also half-demon and Ayaka, a powerless human, is still alive).
Grade: C

Total Grades: 72
Average score: 8
Final Grade: B

And that's the blog for this week!

*Topaz turns to Setsuna, who is angry and embarrassed, trying to keep from exploding.*

: Wow! It seems that Topaz's talking has really angered Setsuna! Let's hope that she really lets 'em have it!

: Ahem. Do not take offense. Although your words are quite... colorful, it is not because of the blog that I have to defeat you.

Right, it's to rescue Konoka!

: Stop bringing her up!

*Setsuna unsheathes her sword.*

: But yes, now that you won't be lasting much longer I can admit it. Aldra has kidnapped Konoka, and if I manage to either kill or remove the demon seed inside you she will be released.

Demon seed?

: Stop thinking dirty things! She obviously means the shadow elemental core in your body!

That.. would be a fairer idea.

: Don't worry, I know of a way to get it out that is relatively painless!

You can? Wow, and doctors were wondering how to remove it for some time.

: That's right!

*Setsuna leaps in the air.*

: All I have to do is kill you. Then you won't feel ANY pain when it's removed!

*She comes crashing down, narrowly missing Topaz as he dives to the ground.*

Sorry, but I have to decline that offer.

: Wow! Did you see that attack? And Setsuna was leaping, which would mean extra damage!

: Seems you're more trouble than I was expecting. Guess I shouldn't go easy on you.

*Setsuna slashes at Topaz a few more times, each time forcing him to step back.*

: Will you just hold still?!

: Looks like Topaz put all his points in evasion.

: This is boring, let's hope that Setsuna doesn't run out of PP or Topaz starts attacking himself. WAIT, what's THIS!

*Setsuna has backed Topaz to the end of the arena floor. It even crumbles slightly.*

: If he gets pushed off, it will be the end of the match! Don't do it Setsuna. That would be anti-climatic!

: It does not matter. I shall slay him here! Zanmaken Ni-no-Tachi (Evil-Cutting Sword, Second Strike)!

*Setsuna uses a powerful sword strike where Topaz is, but he tumbles under her skirt. Unknown to both of them he pulls at a single stray thread, loosening it slightly.*

: What evasion! Let's hope that Topaz has a counter attack in mind!

I do! Take THIS!

*Topaz pushes the black-haired swordgirl on the back, unbalancing her. The thin thread is pulled even further as Topaz's foot is on it. Setsuna falls forward and is unable to catch herself, so Topaz starts to celebrate.*

: Boring! But it seems that Setsuna has-


: She activates her trap card-wait, wrong game.

: Good. I was hoping that she'd use this ability.

: Interesting indeed...

*Setsuna spreads out her wings with a mighty "fwooomp". She then flies above the field, completely avoiding hitting the ground.*

Hey! Flying should be illegal in this sort of competition!

: Tell that to Giran the monster! You've got to figure out an alternate way to beat her!

: Like beating her senseless, or dead!

Both of those sound like horrible ideas.

: I don't see YOU thinking of anything.

I will... Eventually...

: Stop delaying the battle any further. Though do not worry, as I'll end it right here! Sica Shishikushiro!

*Setsuna activates her Pactio, creating 16 small blades that fan out around her. She shoots one at Topaz, but he avoids it.*

: So you're continuing to evade, aren't you. Well, let's see you avoid THIS!

*Setsuna shoots out several blades at once, all flying at Topaz. He avoids two, but one seems unavoidable. It is at that time that Topaz finally takes out his sword. He then hits the incoming blade, causing it to bounce off.*

: What?! You were armed the WHOLE TIME?

: Why didn't you bring that out EARLIER?!

I was saving it for a later battle. Didn't want to play my whole hand at once.

: A brave notion, but looks like you've lost the element of surprise!

It is a shame.

: But since you are armed I have no qualms with using my full power! SHIKA SHISHIKURO!!

*Setsuna spreads out all sixteen blades and shoots them at various angles at Topaz. He manages to deflect some, but many hit and he takes 40 damage from the multiple blades. He looks somewhat injured.*

: ALRIGHT! Now THIS is a fight!

: Don't get too injured Topaz! N-not because I worry about you or anything, harumph.

Don't worry, they're only flesh wounds!

: Hmmm... Hopefully Topaz will activate his "Mazoku" form soon. That way we can get a good sense of his power.

: Agreed. I do hope that once we take his power it will be enough for my... purposes. He should be activating it now, while he's on his last legs.

: Do not think you can evade me as well as you once could!

*Setsuna flies around the arena, using aerial attacks in addition to strike Topaz with her multiple smaller blades. He manages to evade, but he soon becomes tired. However, as she floats around the arena the small lose thread gets caught in the grinding machinery of the Forge arena.*


*She goes to strike, but gets stopped. As if something tugs her backward.*

: Confound it! What matter of mischief are you up to this time, Topaz?

Not me!

: A likely-errgh.. story. Stop it this instant!

*Setsuna keeps pulling and pulling. Eventually the thread has taken enough and Setsuna's outfit falls to pieces, showing off her fundoshi butt and sarashi flat chest, as well as the rest of her body. She turns bright red.*

: NOOOO!!!

*She floats down and runs off, covering her body with her wings.*

: Don't run off! You'll lose the match!

: I don't care! I've already lost my modesty and dignity! GWAAAHH! I am sorry to have failed you, Konoka-ojousama!

*She leaves the main arena area.*

: Well then, looks like Topaz is the winner!

Awesome! Thank goodness for load-bearing outfits!

: You got insanely lucky that match.

Luck is still a skill. One that I seem to have quite high.

*Still up in her room Aldra pounds the arm of her throne.*

: MENACE! How has Topaz been able to defeat one of the girls you blackmailed into fighting for us?

: C-calm down, Aldra-sama. It was merely dumb luck that allowed Topaz a victory. I assure you, the next girl has far more raw power than the scrawny teen.

: For your sake, I hope so...

*The crowd cheers for Topaz.*

: Seems you've quickly become a crowd favorite!

In all fairness they may have just jumped on the bandwagon.

: Or they're a bunch of perverts!

Could be that too.

: Either way we'll be starting the next match in ten minutes! Or technically next week, for broadcast!

: Sometimes time works funny.

Like how one year in a manga or webcomic could take upwards of years real-time?

: Exactly.

: Anyway, let's introduce the next girl while Topaz is getting his wounds treated.

Treated as in bandaged up. They won't let me actually "heal" between matches.

: *While applying bandages to Topaz* I suppose that's part of the challenge, but it does seem like it effects you more than the other girls.

: Do not question Aldra's ways. And now, let's have a big cheer for the one, the only..

*Horse hoofs are heard.*

: Great! A mounted unit!

No... It can't be...

*A centaur arrives in the arena, decked out in full armor. She takes off her helmet to great the audience.*


: That is correct. Now allow me to be the one to defeat thou!

I guess I shouldn't be surprised that Aldra has hired non-human creatures, but how do they expect me to beat HER?

: I sure hope it doesn't involve how Setsuna lost... (For both my sake and the reading audience.)

: Thou would be mistaken to think that such a silly ploy would work on me! But I await thine opinion, next time...
Posted by emperortopaz | Jun 2, 7:51 AM | 0 comments
May 26th, 2016
Anime Relations: Momo Kyun Sword
This is the Three-hundredth-ninety-first week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

Welcome back everyone!

*Topaz stretches.*

Man, I feel great.

: See? I knew that one of my "massages" would perk you up.

: I'd rather not know...

: Especially once I stopped using my hands, ufufufu.

: I SAID I didn't want to know!

Don't make Ririchiyo nervous. *Turns to his assistant* She didn't do anything like you're expecting. Unless you think she stepped on my back.

: I suppose that's not as bad as I was think-HEY! That's my favorite seat! Hopefully she didn't break anything!

: Don't worry, I was gentle.

It still felt great. Somehow I feel as if I regained my lost hit points.

: Sadly you did not gain a level, though.

: In an earlier draft he would have. But speaking of blogs shouldn't we find another girl to talk about?

: What? You don't want to speak about me again?

I don't think the reader will appreciate that.

: Or he'd think it was all one big mistake.

A shame about "Character" from "Show", I suppose.

: I don't know what that means.

: Never mind, blog humor.


: I see. So what should I do while you do this thing?

Well, I guess you can watch over the house and do housework and stuff.

: Don't push all the work on her just because she's a maid!

: I don't mind, but...

*Críet takes out a large cash register-like machine.*

: I'm going to charge you for everything...

Whoa now, let's not do anything too crazy!

: You're so cheap, Topaz.

*While Topaz and the others are talking they don't notice a bush sneaking around outside his house.*

???: Ufufu, they do not expect a thing. Now, to wait here until they exit...

*Back inside.*

: Well, I think we've wasted enough time inside. Come on, let's go searching for girls.

Cruising for babes?! I didn't know you would allow me to do that!

: NOT THAT! I mean one for the blog!

Of course.

: Good luck. I'll stay here and take care of the house.

Sounds good to me.

*Riri and Topaz leave the house, with Críet waving nicely from the doorway. She closes up and Topaz looks behind him to make sure that everything is alright.*

: Stop dawdling! We've got to find a girl-and fast!

I was just worried and-OOMPH!

*A girl leaps out of the mysterious new bush and tackles Topaz to the ground. Riri is still walking forward, not noticing the attack.*

: Let's see... That's this much for bus fare and-


: Right, that much a piece and-


: What? Do you want some fruit to snack on or-

*She finally turns around and sees Topaz is under a girl wielding a polearm. His hands are on the spearhead base, the point over Topaz's head. *


I know!

: Get off him this instant!

*Riri slams her body into the mysterious girl's body and pushes her away.*

: Reveal yourself!

???: I am...

*The girl flings off her huge cloak.*


: That's it? No last name?

I think she's based on a fairy tale.

: I see then.

: I don't know what you mean by "fairy tale", but I was born from a peach!

: Sounds suggestive. I'd say someone I know would like that, but...

No, she means the fruit.

: Ah yes. Now I remember. She's that one genderswapped Momotarou, right?


: Seems my talent precedes me! Do you want to stand down or face me in battle?

Can I wait until after my blog is finished to decide?

: What's a blog?

: He basically talks about you to other people.

: This isn't going to require me to remove clothes... right? Like when I got popular as an idol.

Not unless you want to-KYAN!

*Riri smacks him upside the head.*

: Hey! You can't have nudity during the blog. And stop trying to corrupt innocent girls.

I wasn't trying on purpose, but as you can see...

Today's girl is:

Momo Kyun Sword

Though I would like to mention how dumb the name "Momoko" is for her.

: Well, technically she is a swap of Momo-TAROU.

I meant because her "peach" isn't in the right spot.

: What do you mean by that?

Peaches are obviously butts, not breasts! A shame you don't show off your "true peach" instead.

: To be fair breasts are usually "melons" and Suika already had THAT name...

Fair point, but even if she's Momoko due to coming from a peach there's no reason for her dumb outfit and-

: Whoa whoa whoa. Let's not get too carried away. There's still plenty of blog to go.

Fair point, so let's get started!

Hair: Momoko really has lovely hair. It's a beautiful black color, easily my favorite color for hair. That said, she does have the ability to fuse into different forms using her animal companions. This in turn changes her hair color into blonde, green, blue, or pink depending on which companion she uses (the last one being all three for the finale). Not as great as her basic black hair, but even the pink version isn't too troublesome. She also has somewhat-nice bangs. They look almost hime-like, especially with the sides being so long (and layered, she both has her ears covered and hair down to her neck) though her bangs have a large part in the center. This is because she wears a red peach headband. Her hair is really long as well, reaching down past her feet even when up in a ponytail (her usual look). She also has a really long ribbon at the base of the ponytail, with a golden peach holder on it. The other forms also have separate hair styles, with the blue being very similar, the green and pink also have ponytails, and the pink is more free. Sadly the blonde monkey form has short hair. Overall Momoko does really great here, though I would definitely enjoy if she had it down more to showcase her volume.
Grade: A-

Eyes: Again Momoko has a great color scheme here. Her eyes are a beautiful purple color, though again her eyes change in her various forms. Another problem is that Momoko's eyes are a somewhat generic tarame. Nothing wrong with that as there's still other girls with tsurime eyes, but having such rounded eyes does make Momoko look younger and more childish than she needs to. Nothing bad, though, and I suppose glasses would do a lot to help out.
Grade: B-

Face: Momoko has an amazing face too. She has great puni-like cheeks with a rosy blush. She also has a big, expressive mouth and a small nose. Really, everything looks nice for my tastes, and there's not much to discuss here. I will say that, as a sorta low-budget series, that Momoko does occasionally fall off-model too. She also gets various facial.. paint? Tattoos? Some sort of design on her face when she transforms, though it's not permanent.
Grade: A-

Build: PEACHES ARE BUTTS! Er, I suppose that's more something for the next area, but really. Momoko should show of her “true peach” more often, and by that I mean her butt. She does get a couple of quick moments, but Onihime her brown-skinned rival seems to be more of a butt girl (granted, that's slightly more fair than a lot of other series, but still). Other than that she does have a nice, curvy body. Her arms and legs are also properly proportioned, and in general she looks really nice. She's also somewhat strong, though in most battles she has to merge with one or more animal companions to beat the opponent. Speaking of which, when she merges she gains some properties of the animals (such as a dog/monkey tail or feather-like hair decorations). She may be somewhat tall, but without any sort of measurement or scale it's hard to tell. Another thing I'd want to mention is that, in an early episode, Momoko gets challenged to an eating competition and eats so much her face and body are stretched out. While it's not for long I found it to be interesting that she'd change so much, even her face gets plumped up. That said, it's still a shame that she's introduced with her chest being a “peach".
Grade: B

Breasts: As said before, it's really dumb that her chest is considered her “peach”. I mean, the way they position her shirt does make it look peach-like, but it's a really dumb introduction. Momoko does have a pretty large chest, though considering some of the other girls in the series she might be placed as “average” among them all. That said she's certainly a chest character, showing cleavage and getting clothing destruction all the time. It would be fairly nice for me, though the rest of her body needed to be shown off too of course. And Momoko definitely has a “bounce” problem. She'd jiggle just by WALKING and the first episode has her bounce so much that her breasts nearly become VERTICAL. Sadly I imagine that Momoko being so fanservicy turned a lot of people off the series, which is a big shame as the series needs more attention. Size-wise and not bouncing around like she's trying to make a fruit cocktail Momoko looks pretty good, but she certainly has her annoying situations. I mean other than the dumb “peach” idea too. Apparently in the Blu Ray she also has a minor nipple peek. A majority of the series was nude-free, but for whatever reason there was a screen crop on the broadcast and they sneaked in a nipple when Momoko is losing her top. It's not the best-looking and actually hurt her a bit more than you'd expect. Down with boob peaches!
Grade: B-

Clothes: Momoko's clothes are, well, they're not great. What they are is thematic, though. Her traditional-looking outfits certainly fit with the time period the series is based in, though with a lot more exposure than I'd expect. Momoko usually wears a white top with a peach-based opening to show off her cleavage (still dumb), a pink shoulder-jacket over that, a purple belt with three stones and a smaller, lighter belt over it, and a short red skirt that's unfortunately pleated. She also has unattached white sleeves and white thigh-highs, and seems to wear panties under her skirt. She also has some variety as her outfits change when she absorbs her animal companions. The dog form gives her a purple strap-top of sorts with silly loincloth-like pants (as they hang down in front for some reason), the pheasant gives an even more revealing white sling-top with flowing bottom, and the monkey reminds me of Infernape for obvious reasons with furry joints, breastplate of sorts, and gauntlets. In the beach episode Momoko wears a pink and white bikini, though when the top is lost she has to fight with another girl's top (much like Goldilocks she had to look at one too small, one too large, and one that was “just right”, if slightly tight). Oh and of course she often ends up naked or with torn clothes after battle, though it's usually covered with pink fog. Overall her biggest problem is that her outfits are mamocentric and that definitely needed to change, but the variety does help.
Grade: B

Personality: Momoko is the genderswap version of the classic “Momotarou” fairy tale. As a result she was born from a peach and raised by her adoptive grandparents. In reality she is a child of celestial and demonic birth, and her sister's reveal was another fairly big surprise for the series. Other than that, there's not much to talk about in her past. Well, I guess there are three animal companions that hang around her (a dog, a monkey, and a pheasant. The latter is female, if wondering). Much like a magical girl Momoko can fuse with them using her “Momokyun Possession” ability. She also keeps a dagger that belongs to her grandfather, which she loses in an episode and has to go retrieve. Otherwise she's tasked with finding shards of a divine peach, going to various locations around Japan to get one.
Momoko is a standard lead character. She's airheaded and is somewhat of a dojikko (especially when it will put her in a perverse position), but she's honorable and has a strong sense of justice. She certainly tries hard and is a bit stubborn, but she's friendly and has good intentions. She's also fairly skilled at combat, even if she often has to combine once an episode. She usually uses a sword, but in other forms she uses different weapons; with the dog she uses a polearm, the monkey gives her a pair of claws, and the pheasant gives her a bow. Overall she's not exactly a complex character, but for the series she's from she certainly works.
Momoko is voiced by Ayana Taketatsu who is a really good VA. She did Momoko really well, at least I think so. Though she does need more attention to her fanservice-lead series like Momo Kyun and SekaTsuyo (also another series she voiced a sorta fruit-named tall girl with long dark hair).
Grade: B

Libido: Sadly Momoko really suffers here. She doesn't seem to really have any interest in love at all. I will say that she chastises her male animal companions and others for being perverse, which would hurt if they weren't actually animals. Probably the closest thing she has here is her rivalry with Onihime, which I do support. Though I would say that Onihime would more likely be the lead in that pair. She also gets fondled by Ringo, the red-haired divine assistant, in the hot springs and returns the favor too. Not that anything would come out of that, but I felt that I should mention it.
Grade: C-

Age: Momoko's age is never mentioned, other than being born in a peach some time ago. She seems to be in her high teens or twenties, but I cannot be sure.
Grade: B

Total Grades: 70
Average score: 7.8
Final Grade: B

And that's the blog for this week!

*Topaz turns to Momoko who is flustered and covering her face with her hands.*

: I can't believe that you would look at me with such lewd eyes!

: Don't be too embarrassed. He does that to all girls.

: HEATHEN! I will have to pass on my offer. I'm going to defeat you!

But I haven't done anything wrong!

: Nonsense! Menace told me that you were a cruel man and wanting beautiful women to become your harem!

That would be nice, but that's not the intent of this blog.

: Honestly, considering she wants to rebuild her kingdom that sounds like something SHE'd want to do...

: Enough of your lies! I shall defeat you here! Then you shall be judged in the arena!

: Wait, so you're not going to finish him off?

: No, I am but a messenger. I was told to force Topaz to join the Colosseum matches that start next month.

Didn't I just beat Melona there?

: That was separate. But if you won't come easily, I'll be forced to knock you out!

*Momoko slashes at Topaz, cutting his clothes as he narrowly avoids her polearm.*

Alright then! I'll go, I'll go!

: Enough of your tricks! You'll probably try to escape half-way. I'll put an end to your lying devious ways this instant by knocking you out!

If only Momoyo was here I'd have her fight in my place!

: She probably wouldn't be challenged enough. Plus the close names would make the audience confused.

: Who is this "Momoyo" girl?

She's a strong fighter that has "peaches" as her favorite food.

: Wait, do you mean butts again?

No. Though considering it's Momoyo I wouldn't be surprised. She does like Yukie, after all...HEY!

*Topaz narrowly avoids another slash.*

: Be careful, she looks fast!

You think I want to be hit?

: No, I mean because she looks like she'd crit every time!

Those are just first generation rules. Like how X Accuracies are broken. Wait, no. It was like that in GBC too.

*Momoko makes several more strikes. Suddenly Críet bursts through the door.*

: What are you guys doing out here that's making so much noise?!

*She sees Topaz under attack. It looks like he's cornered.*

: Oh no! Topaz!

*Críet slides between Momoko and Topaz, her maid dress getting heavily damaged and showing her sexy tanline body. Though nothing questionable is shown as she still has her bra and thong panties on.*

: Don't get in my way, minion of Onihime!

: O-Onihime? Who's that?

: Don't consider her a demon just because she has pointed ears and dark skin!

Listen to Ririchiyo, she knows demons! She even is one!

: HEY!

: You expect me to believe your words when you work with such forces of evil? And YOU, leave so that I may face and knock Topaz unconscious myself!

: What if he wins?

: I don't see how that can be, but sure. If I get knocked out instead I'll take you all to the Colosseum. There you can fight in the annual battles, as usual.

Oh yeah, forgot that was in June...

: That's good to hear, so take THIIIISSSS!

*Críet swings the cash register-like machine at Momoko, knocking her out.*

Man! That was sure one good COUNTER ATTACK!

: Topaz... Only Spanish people will get that.

Nothing wrong with that, and the internet will help with the rest.

: At least my math skills have come in handy... And speaking of that-

*Críet makes an obscene hand gesture.*

: Topaz, you need to stop making sex jokes...

That wasn't me! Technically, at least.... But for now let's wait until she gets up...

==Time passes and Momoko explains a bit more==

: And that's all I know about Aldra, Menace, and the Colosseum. Are you sure you want to go?

Sadly we didn't hear anything new, so I can edit that out. But I do feel I have to go. If anything this is a huge trap and I need to be there for plot reasons.

: I just hope that nothing dangerous happens.

Don't worry. What's the worst that could happen?

: I don't know, but for some reason I have a bad feeling...

I'm sure it's nothing. Besides, I bet we'll meet great girls there! So check back next week, readers!

Posted by emperortopaz | May 26, 9:03 AM | 0 comments
May 19th, 2016
Anime Relations: Astarotte no Omocha!
This is the Three-hundredth-ninetieth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

Welcome back everyone! Last week we were visited by the motherly Mercelida.

: Technically I'm still here. It's the same day and all.

: We totally don't film these in advance-er, I mean. Wow that was a long week and stuff!

Exactly! Anyway, after the blog Mercelida was asked by her handmaiden if she could have a blog as well. As I'm a generous person, I agreed to it.

: You totally don't have ulterior motives, right?

Certainly not. Though I do wonder what's keeping her...

: She does like to make an entrance. Maybe she's up to no good.

I can't imagine that being the reason...

*Meanwhile, unknown to Topaz and the others a maid is climbing up a ladder on the side of his house. She even gets on the roof.*

???: Ufufu. Won't Topaz be surprised to see me fall into his arms all romantically. He won't be able to keep himself off me! Though I'll be in charge, of course. W-wait... I'm stuck!

*The maid gets her panties somehow caught on the side of the ladder. She manages to pull them free, but by doing so her panties rip off. This results in the girl losing her balance as well as she stumbles across. She eventually hits the wrong spot and falls through the roof.*

???: SHOOOT!

*She falls through into the room that Topaz and the others are sitting. In fact she falls butt-first onto Topaz's face. All he sees is a flash of white being squished by two meaty buttocks.*



: I see that's what she was trying to do then.

: Are you alright, Topaz?!

*Topaz struggles under the flabby behind for a bit before becoming limp.*

: Quick! Give him some air! It looks like he's ASS-phyxiated!

: Wait, don't! He's not Zettai!

???: How about if I just get up then?

*The mysterious maid stands, allowing Topaz to cough as he breathes the fresh air.*

???: My apologies! It seems that my plan didn't go as expected!

No worries, I certainly enjoyed it this way too!

: This is no time to be enjoying pandering, Topaz. At least introduce the girl!

Good point.

???: Right, it is getting tiring trying to keep in shadows like this.

Well then, why don't you come out of them, CRIET!

*The mysterious shadowy maid finally reveals herself.*

: Exactly! Though don't think anything perverse about that narration.

: Aww man. I like thinking dirty things!

: We know. So how is your face doing, Topaz?

Quite nicely-or wait, is that an insult?

: N-not at all! (what if he thinks I think he's ugly.. I'd better write a large apology!)

: And how come you don't use accents and stuff either?

Americans are bad at that sort of thing! Also pronunciations.

: But in reality Topaz has no clue how to add them and has to look up the accent on the internet every time. Then he copy-pastes it.

Shhh, don't tell them my secret.

: Regardless, as Mercelida has told you, I would like a blog!

: Oh no! You're going to review the sunburnt goddess!

: Ehhh? What do you mean?

I think she's confusing you with Hestia.

: ... Fair point. But they do look a lot alike.

: Thanks, I'll take looking like a goddess as a compliment.

You should, and getting to the blog itself...

Today's girl is:

Críet Trédís
Lotte no Omocha

: At least he put the accent in there. But why did you link Mercelida to the anime and Críet to the manga?

I did experience the anime first, but sadly Críet did not make an appearance in the anime.

: Sadly the anime needs a second season so I can be shown! But it looks like the company's not interested.

: A shame. I'd love to put in more work.

Just make sure that Xebec doesn't do it. They have enough work perhaps ruining Keijo.

: Topaz is an eternal optimist. Sadly Xebec does not seem to have the greatest track record.

: But neither does J-CUP Staff and they did our show well.

True, though the series does get bogged down with breast moments and, for whatever reason, a random trap.

: Naoya isn't random.

: Agreed, he's cute in girl's clothes!

I meant the other one. The one that puts the name "Leo" to shame.

: A-HEM. As much as I'd enjoy standing here and listening to you complain, how about you get started on the blog?

Good plan!

Hair: Críet's hair is one of her best features. It's long, going past her hips but fortunately avoids cover her butt at times. Her hair being up in twintails usually helps, especially since hers are on her sides, and even when it's down and looks gorgeous we still see her butt. It also looks silky and smooth when down, though as she was taking a bath at the time it may have just been wet. Her hair is also black, which is my favorite hair color and it plays off her dark skin even better than normal. She also seems to have two short antenna pointing upward, though they aren't noticeable overall and is something I just recently noticed. Críet's only “weakness” would be her bangs; while being somewhat close to a hime her hair has a bit too much space between the bangs in a zig-zag-like way. I'm probably poorly describing her bangs, but overall they look great still and her sides are likewise really great by reaching her cheeks. Críet also often wears a maid headdress and occasionally wears ribbons at the base of her twintails. Overall she does really wonderful here, definitely a high-scorer.
Grade: A

Eyes: Sadly Críet does not wear glasses, even for a short time like Mercelida did. And her shape, while having a slight inward incline, is not as great as the succubus queen's either. Críet's eyes are also a bit bigger, fitting her younger age I imagine. What really helps Críet is COLOR. Specifically because she has the best color for me in purple and looks really great. That said sadly she's not in the anime so the most we see of her with this color is when she's a chibi on the back cover of one of the books. A shame, really.
Grade: B

Face: Críet has a very soft-looking face. It's slightly puni, fitting the other younger characters in the series with soft-looking cheeks. Críet's cheeks also have a bit of rosiness to them as well. Oh, and as she's the series's “Dark elf” equivalent she has pointed ears, though to be fair almost every character has them. Her small features and dot nose certainly appeal to me too. Overall she's very cute and has a lot of nice moments, but it's sadly not enough to boost her up or make her too memorable (if only she was in the anime...).
Grade: B+

: I'm doing well so far!

I agree, if only you wore glasses like Mercelida you'd be doing much better.

: Though only a small amount better...

: Well then, let's see what I have here.

*She brings out a big box and throws glasses all over.*

: Glasses for everyone!

*The girls get glasses conveniently landing on their faces correctly, looking even more beautiful than ever. Topaz even has on his face, though he has at least three extra pairs on his head.*

I may like glasses, but this is silly!

*He takes off the superfluous glasses and returns them to Mercelida.*

: This reminds me of all the moments Zettai has where he caters to you. You really need to be a better friend for him!

I do...

: Don't worry. I'll be sure to visit him in a “dream” later on...

I'm sure he'll love that, though he'd like it even more if you described it further.

: Well, it would involve me and all his favorite mothers all caring for his every need. Rinko, Meme, Akiko, Cattleya, Rosa, Iris... The list goes on. Of course he'll have to cater to our every sexual whims. Which of course means dominating him with our big mature butts.

: I'm sorry I asked...

Don't be sorry, I'm sure he'll love it!

: Of course, such amazing dreams will require a lot of mana on my part. I sure hope that he's up to “satisfying” me enough to “recharge” after he wakes up.

: With all those gassy foods you'll eat on the way there I'm sure that he'll sploot it out in no time!

: Don't be ridiculous. I'll force him to endure for a while being my seat. THEN I'll have anal intercourse and, after he's satisfied me, I'll let him release.

: Something tells me that we should have censored that.

Don't worry, hopefully no kids happen on this blog!

: Good point-WAIT, stop getting distracted Topaz. You have a blog to finish!

You're right!

Build: Like Mercelida before her Críet also has measurements. She's 154 cm and 41 kg, meaning she's still somewhat teen-sized. What isn't teen-sized though seems to be her three sizes, which are 85-57-84. So in other words she's what's considered an “oppai loli”. Fortunately for Críet she's not as mamocentric as another JC Staff girl that's also a look alike (though who knows how they would have treated Críet...). Fortunately she does seem to show her butt quite a bit to balance things out. From wearing thongs to the off-roof landing where she falls butt-first onto Naoya she has a significant amount of butt scenes. That said her older sister Helga shows off her butt more anyway.
Of course the main reason I like Críet is for her skin. Wait, allow me to rephrase that. Críet has some of the most unique skin I've seen, and that makes her memorable. Er, what I'm getting at is that Críet is actually a mixed-race character. As she is only mostly “Dark elf” her skin as a whole is brown, but as she's mixed race her skin is much more mottled in certain areas. Críet herself has probably the best type of mottled as, conveniently, she has a permanent swimsuit-style tan. She's embarrassed by this, but much like Naoya I find her to be beautiful. Overall her height is the main problem I'd say; not that there's anything wrong with short girls but I prefer taller ones like Kan'u Uchou (another great dark-skinned girl).
Grade: A-

Breasts: As said before, Críet has a bust size of 85 cm. She also has an E-cup, meaning she's quite sizable. With the exception of Effie the literal cow she probably has the biggest chest in Lotte's mansion too. She's also shown off quite a bit, being proud of her large chest and even attempting to seduce Naoya with her breasts. Her chest is also pale, as said before she has a swimsuit tan and that includes her chest. For a bit of off-screen service she also has a bust-sumo match with Effie as well (though it was one sided. Probably would have been fairer had they used butts, but sadly the series didn't think of that). We also do not see Críet's nipples, though there isn't many moments where they would have been shown anyway. Overall she has a great chest, with her main weakness being that it tends to dominate her service at times.
Grade: A

Clothes: Críet has quite a few nice outfits. We first see her in a school uniform-like outfit, including pantyhose though it should be said that it's not as easy to tell with her dark skin. It resembles a sailor uniform as well, with the collar and ribbon as well as a shirt with a turtleneck. Then, for her job she dons a well-covering maid uniform, complete with apron and long sleeves. Sorry if I can't define the color of her outfits, she's manga-only but sorry for adding that so much too. Under it she seems to wear string panties, which she gives to the often-nopan Asuha. Then she wears a customized one after Naoya tells Críet her skin is beautiful, a definite downgrade as she shows off way too much cleavage and seems to be lacking straps of any kind. I'd rather have the first version back, even if I like her being proud of her tanline. Other outfits she gets put in include thong underwear, a well-supported bikini for the aforementioned bust sumo, a nurse's outfit with hat and necktie, and a leotard that is part of a catgirl outfit. Probably the biggest problem is that, much like the other girls in the series, Críet seems to have a problem with showing her chest off most often. To be fair she has an understandable reason, she knows that Naoya likes big breasts and is actively trying to wedge herself between him and Lotte (it obviously doesn't work). A flimsy reason sure, but at least it's better than the often-used reason of big breasts meaning more fanservice. But chest focus aside she does have a lot of nice outfits.
Grade: B+

: Sadly as proud as I am Mercelida still has a shapelier body.

: Ara ara. I am older than you after all.

Almost twice as old!

*Mercelida glares at Topaz.*

Er, I mean....

: Don't worry, I was just being playful.

Well, anyway you have to remember that sizes aren't the only thing I judge on.

: Right. Though sometimes it sure seems that way *coughboobscough*.

I suppose there is that, but I also aren't as judgmental on measurements as people probably just pick numbers at random. There's also proportion as well. For example, Críet has hips that are 11 cm smaller than Mercelida's, but she's also 21 cm shorter too so her butt might look bigger. We can't rely just on numbers, and that's not even counting series that lack measurements.

: Get off your soapbox, Topaz.

Oh, I'm not saying that we should ignore them either. Especially the problems with unfairness between breasts and butts. I guess it's just a case-by-case situation.

: You're right, Topaz! I knew that I could count on you! How about a reward?

Oh? What would you do?

: Well, I could show you why they call me a “handmaiden”, ufufu.

: That sounds like something we shouldn't show...

I'm sure it's just a simple massage, like she gave Naoya.

: Even so, you've got a blog to finish!

Good point! Let's finish up!

Personality: As mentioned before, Críet is a secondary character that comes late and ends up not being in the anime as a result. She's introduced as King Sveinn's illegitimate child that was away during the first part of the series (the King being the king of the “Nótt Álfur”, the resident “dark elf” group). She returned as her mother died and they had been living independently from the royal family. As Críet didn't want to live on hand-outs she came back to seek work. Not only that, but Críet became scared of showing her body as their small family had to stay on the run. Seeing her brother Sigurð and sister Helga hopelessly in love when she returned lead her to want to investigate Lotte's relationship. As a result Críet got a job working at her mansion to spy. That said, the plot was only a few chapters long before Críet started to fall for Naoya herself, especially after he complimented her skin. She hung awhile for the rest of the series, but sadly she really doesn't get closure on this. I mean, it was found out but Judit, a meganekko in Lotte's service, thought that the rivalry might be useful. That's really the biggest problem with Críet as she ends up just working for Lotte in the ending, I mean I wasn't expecting much but at least have her meet with her siblings again.
Críet is embarrassed of her body due to culture reasons, though luckily that part of her grew and she's much more confident at the end of her arc. Críet herself is pretty perky but not in the annoying excitable way either. She's very optimistic and not afraid to show off or tease others. Overall she's a fairly strong secondary character with more background and personality than just being fanservice (unlike a certain dairy fairy or trap). Oh, and her name is often shortened to “Críe”, forgot to mention that in Mercelida/Merce's blog. Another thing are the random vital statistics and skills, with Críet's most random one being that she has a level in ACCOUNTING of all things (Maid level 2 and Housekeeping level 2 make more sense).
Grade: B-

Libido: As said before Críet enjoys teasing others, even if told to do so by Judit. It's not to the point of wanting to establish a romantic link with Naoya, but rather to split the couple up so that her siblings can pick up the pieces. NTR is bad though, so it's a good thing that she doesn't succeed. That said I do like how she does research into Naoya's fetishes and as a result teases him with her chest a lot. She also facesits him while giving him a massage (I think, it's hard to tell) and I like the silly way she mentioned that she'll make him “sploot” it out when he's sick xD. Naoya might be older than Críet as well, but he seems shota enough that it still seems sexy. Speaking of shotas though, it's a shame that they stuck the trap Leofin (who is 13, if curious) with one of Lotte's friends rather than Críet. Well, it's sort of rude to shove a trap in to try and fit in with what's popular at that time, but still. After all, it would have been a perfect relationship; I get my favorite with a trap and they'd go away, and he'd be happy as he'd marry into “royalty”. He even seems fascinated with Críet in her maid outfit at one time! Though sadly this also lead Críet to to dress HIM in girl's clothes as he was more admiring the outfit, and that ended up being a slippery slope that the series really didn't know what to do with. Sadly as said he doesn't seem interested, and even Naoya isn't too interested despite blushing after looking at her chest at times. It all makes Críet start thinking that the problem is with her, which is a shame as she's a beautiful and seductive girl! Though it is a shame that she was worried she'd be “attacked” by Naoya as the opposite would be much better.
Grade: A-

Age: Sadly Críet is somewhat young. She's fifteen, which makes her body not seem as appealing. Nothing wrong with it, but do note that her body always seems more mature. That said it's still better than Mist, one of Lotte's friends, who has about the same measurements even though she's only ten.
Grade: C

Total Grades: 80
Average score: 8.9
Final Grade: B+

: That's it? Mercelida got a much higher score!

That happens some times.

: She even got a picture, so what gives? I thought that I was your favorite from the series!

You are, but sometimes the blog and my personal opinions don't match up.

: If it helps, you tied with Mercelida when Topaz first started his rough draft. Sadly not appearing much in the last few books really hampered your score.

Exactly. I would have liked some sort of resolution with your backstory or something.

: Don't worry. I'm sure that Topaz will think highly of you after you “perform” for him. Ufufu...

: I just want to say I'm against such things.

: You can't keep a cutie like Topaz-bou all to yourself, Ririchiyo.


: Er, slip of the tongue I'm sure. Anyway, prepare for a the best massage of your life.

: While you're doing that I'll head to Spain. I have some “business” to attend to...

I “hope” Zettai enjoys your “fun”. Mothers are awesome after all.

: I'm sure he will, though maybe I'll have that dominant assistant of his teach me his more sensitive spots...

*Mercelida flies off, making sure to show off her C-string wearing butt aplenty.*

: Don't worry, I'll wait until the end of the blog. Then I'll work out my “frustrations” on you, heh heh heh.

Sounds like a good time to me, but first before ending this blog I need a hint about next week's girl.

: Well, you don't NEED one but it does give fans something to look forward to. So what is it?

Let's just say that I might be feeling “fruity” sometime next week.

: Topaz, that's the first blog of April. It's like the end of May already. Or have you forgotten Nagisa this quickly?

Not that kind of “fruity”.

: Either way, I hope to return. After all, once I'm done Topaz shouldn't forget about me <3.

*The scene fades out as the blog ends.*
Posted by emperortopaz | May 19, 8:13 AM | 0 comments
May 12th, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-eighty-nineth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

Welcome back everyone. Last week we looked at a dancing girl, but now we're back home!

: Thank goodness! It was a busy time last month, so even with the concert I'm exhausted!

Luckily we're having the mother come visit us, and she's even coming over from another world!

: But we've already done a mature space alien girl! Though in all fairness she wasn't a mother...

True for Mizuho, but don't forget we've also done Tearju.

: Oh yeah.

So do you remember the hint I gave last week, Riri?

: About that...

*Ririchiyo whispers in Topaz's ear.*

O-oh.. Well then, let's see this mother that Zettai did last *cough*December*, Mercelida Ygvar!

*A beautiful curvy succubus enters, the camera focusing on her curves including butt.*

: Oh my, how naughty!

: I told you to get that perverted camera fixed!

I see no problems. Now, come over here and talk about things.

: Are you sure that the only thing you want to do is "talk"?

Ahh-er, um...


Y-yes, that is all that I should do.

: Are you su-re~? I mean your friend got a facesitting and mo~ore <3.

The former sounds great, Zettai can keep the latter. No offense to him, of course.

: I'd rather not see either.

You're just saying that because you want to be the only one to sit on me.

: N-nonsense!

*Ririchiyo blushes and averts her eyes.*

: How cute. Don't worry, I'm sure there would be plenty of room.

I wouldn't be so sure, your butt is pretty big.

: That's both "pretty" and "big", of course. But I suppose that I can tease you in ways your friend wouldn't enjoy too...

*Mercelida holds Topaz's chin and looks into his eyes. She's so close he flusters as she might kiss him.*

Uh... uh...

*Topaz likewise averts his eyes, but Mercelida frees him.*

: You're going to be a fun pair to tease, ufufu.

: This is your fault, Topaz!

Maybe, but I didn't realize that I'd be so weak towards mothers.

: So you DO remember a certain archer's blog. She did tell me to let you eat all the "melons" and "peaches" you want, even if it would have to be off screen.

Riri! Can I?

*The loli lets out a sigh.*

: I suppose so. You've been a good boy for a while so I'll give you permission. Of course you cannot feed her "there" though.

*She wags her finger to emphasize her point.*

: And of course, you have to do the blog first.


: Ufufu, how pure.

I'm pure in some ways, but I still enjoy sexual things. As an example...

Today's girl is:

Mercelida Ygvar
Lotte no Omocha

: Somehow I'm not surprised that you managed to find an image with Mercelida in glasses...

No glasses girls escape my Keen Eye! Also my accuracy can't be lowered but that's not important.

: Liar!

Alright, so I don't actually have that ability. Good thing too as it sucks. I really used the image because there's so few official images of Mercelida floating around. Though I can't say that it's completely independent of her glasses. But now that that's clear, let's begin!

Hair: Mercelida has pretty great hair. The length certainly looks great, reaching past her hips but fortunately (as far as I can remember) it doesn't block her butt. It's also a bit wavy, though she sometimes keeps it up in a bob for a more elegant style. She also sometimes has it up in a ponytail, and in flashbacks she often has twintails (both with short hair and without). Her bangs aren't that impressive, being somewhat generic with a long middle bang though the sides are also long. Speaking of long sides, Mercelida also has long sides on the side of her head that reach past her shoulders. She also has two long antenna. Of course, we can't forget that Mercelida is blonde, but that's a bit bad as I do prefer darker colors. Nothing wrong with blondes but it isn't too notable for me.
Grade: A-

Eyes: Mercelida has pretty eyes that have a lovely, seductive tsurime shape. It's a strong tsurime too, going inward with a thick upper eyelash. Her eyes are also a greenish color that looks nice, and while the pupil is a little unusual it's not too noticeable. While her eyebrows aren't especially thick, they are noticeable as well though that's fine for me. Overall her eyes are pretty, and the fact that she wears glasses while sneaking into the school also helps. Sadly I don't think she wears them at any other point, but they are a nice thick-framed pair of red glasses and I appreciate these sort of moments. Just wish that Mercelida would have worn glasses more.
Grade: B+

Face: Mercelida also has a fairly nice face. She is a bit more mature than most girls I talk about, but that's completely understandable. It's not a bad thing either, though she does have a large nose at times which I'm not fond of. Also, since I forgot to mention them Mercelida, being a succubus, has pointed ears. That said, in the series that's not too surprising as almost every character has them, though I'm not saying it's a bad thing either. She also has soft, shiny, and supple-looking cheeks that look amazing. Er, on her face, of course. Finally, she also seems to wear make-up, or at least lipstick as her lips are visible.
Grade: B

: Ufufu, you are really different from the other one who blogged about me.

Well, Zettai and I look at distinctly different things. Like me and my glasses fetish.

: So, for example...

*Mercelida puts on a pair of glasses.*

: I were to put THESE on...


: Settle down, pervert! You've still got plenty of blog to do!

But look at how gorgeous she is!

*She sparkles with beauty.*

: Oh ho ho, well I AM a queen. And a succubus.

: Title drop? Not quite, sad to say. Wait, I shouldn't make meta jokes like that.

: Seems Topaz really likes me in glasses. How about I sit on your lap while you finish?

I don't think that Riri will appreciate that...

: Grrr... Stop moving on him, you floozy! (wait, do people still use “floozy”? Curses, I'm beginning to second guess myself.)

: A shame...

I agree, though in all fairness it would probably distract me...

: Oh? You don't want to. be. Distracted?

*Mercelida winks while adjusting her glasses.*

...Uh, were you saying something?

: Ufufufu, you pure boys are so much fun to toy with. But since you want to finish, I'll remove them for now.

*Mercelida sadly removes her glasses.*

: There. Hope you won't be as distracted.

Huh? Where was I? It's like I was in a dream for the last few moments.

: Don't be ridiculous Topaz. Just having a mature mother in glasses isn't anything that special. I mean Cattleya does it all the time.


*Topaz spaces out again, only to be hit painlessly in the back of his head by Ririchiyo.*

: Stop dazing off and get back to the blog!

: Ufufu, you two are so comedic together.

Build: Mercelida is a succubus with a very curvy body, so it should be obvious that her score is good here. And we actually have measurements too! Mercelida is 175 cm tall, which is nice for me as Naoya (the male lead) is only 170 cm, and she weighs 65 kg. This makes her one of the heaviest anime girls I know of, though there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Her three sizes are 103/62/95, and there's a major problem already. No, not the wide waist. I like plump girls so that's completely fine. No, it's that her bust and hips are 8 cm apart, and that's far beyond my personal rule of 5 cm. Granted, Mercelida is not the poorest example and that's even in-series, and she still gets a fair share of butt service. In fact, 95 cm is pretty high all things considered, and her plump butt looks amazing. Not only that but her legs and body looks great in general. She's just an extremely attractive woman. Which I guess makes sense considering she's a succubus, complete with tail and bat-like wings (no horns, and sometimes she keeps the wings kept in and they look like tattoos). Oh, and I should mention that she's the mother of at least two girls, but likely only those two. Not sure why she suddenly had two kids and then stopped for at least ten years.
Grade: B+

: Raising heirs is hard work. Releasing “airs” is not, ufufufu...

Breasts: As said before Mercelida has a large chest size. Her bust is 103 cm and she's an H-cup apparently. That said, it's still not the largest example in the series but at least Mercelida isn't oversized like the cow girls. She actually looks fitting, and while she doesn't show nipples this is only because she wears pasties. Overall she looks great, and even with a bit of motherly sag she does excellent here for me.
Grade: A

Clothes: Mercelida wears a lot of sexy outfits, with the one she's most known for being her blue leotard with cleavage and navel windows, and on bottom she wears pantyhose. It's kind of a shame her outfits focus so much on her cleavage. I get that she's proud of her libido, but for a “lolicom” series Lotte seems to be preoccupied with breasts far too much. Oh, and I should add that she also wears long sleeves, though they aren't connected to the leotard. She also wears a similar outfit later on, though with a c-string and bra strap. She also wears a blue bikini in the beach episode, showing off her supported chest and thong back well. She also has a frilly royal dress, though it still shows cleavage. Other outfits include a lot of lewd outfits as a child (seriously, one has an exposed chest with pasties), a great suit when impersonating a teacher (though sadly lacking a necktie), a bathrobe, and in the past she borrows a sweater with necktie. She also wears a fairly heavy wedding dress in the finale. Overall she does quite well, appealing to a lot of my tastes but sadly her cleavage focus does hurt her a bit.
Grade: B+

: You ARE quite different from your friend. I mean, I could tell when you talked about my face, but those scores are far higher...

: You'll have to understand. Topaz is still a recovering boobaholic. As a result he still thinks with the wrong brain sometimes.

I am a terrible person occasionally, but at least I have empathy!

: That's kind of you, but it explains why you were poorly refusing my attempts. You'd prefer something el~se <3.

Yes, but likewise I have to refuse. At least on camera.

: Don't worry, I understand. Though I'm surprised you complain about my outfits showing off my chest. I'd think that it would cause you to be excited, ufufu...

That doesn't mean I can't complain. It is still annoying how often girls aren't well supported.

: Yes, but I can do your favorite <3.

Y-you know about pa-pa-

: Of course! You think I wouldn't know about that sort of thing? I also know about the other names of “boobjob” and “ti-”

*Topaz puts up his hands.*

Hey hey hey. No need to use that sort of language here.

: Besides, you may be a mother and have a sorta-similar outfit, but I've seen enough from that one Granblue girl recently.

She has gotten quite popular... *ahem* Anyway, let's get back to the blog.

: Wait. Since you're here how about you show me the sort of girl's outfit I should wear?

More glasses! More suits! More pantyhose! More glasses!

*Mercelida writes on a notepad.*

: Uh huh uh huh.

Also for my friend more thongs and C-strings! Though not with pantyhose. Well, maybe the C-strings, but I'm sure you understand. Have I mentioned more glasses?

: And not as much forced cleavage either! Change the school uniforms to blazers! With buruma! (wait, I shouldn't be caught up in such a stupid conversation.)

I approve of those changes.

: I see. And do you have any sort of fabric that I can use?

Riri, show her your thong.

*Riri whacks Topaz again.*

: I'm not even wearing a thong today!

Going commando then?

*He is hit again.*

: NO! And I'm not telling you what sort of panties I have on either!

*Mercelida is lifting Ririchiyo's skirt in the back.*

: Looks like it's striped this time. Here I was expecting something oddly sexy to tease your boyfriend with, ufufu.

*Riri turns around and shoos Mercelida back to her seat, pulling her skirt back down.*

: Stop pestering us and allow Topaz to do your blog!

: Fine fine, ufufu.


*Topaz pulls something out of his pants.*

: Please rephrase that description immediately, narrator.

*Fine, Topaz removes an item out of his inventory.*

: What an odd place for an inventory. To bad you found what you were looking for. I'm sure I'd enjoy searching, ufufu...

*Riri shoots the succubus a glare.*

Anyway, here it is!

*Topaz holds up Tsugumi's ribbon.*

: I suppose that counts as a piece of cloth...

: That's perfect!

*She takes the ribbon.*

: I can't wait to turn this into my next outfit!

: Don't you mean an inspiration for your next outfit? Or an accessory?

: No, ufufu...

Glad you like it.

: Now... How about a reward?

*Mercelida closes in on Topaz again.*


: We take material goods and not services though.

Hey, when was that decided?

: Just now, because I don't want to see you taken advantage of.

But it's not like I'll trade a Chocobo Egg for a Magic Gourd!

: Nice classic game reference. But we'll gladly trade you something for that ribbon, Mercelida.

: Hmmm. I'll have to check with my handmaiden. She's waiting outside.

Handmaiden? Why?

: Well, I don't want to be stuck here on Earth. Again.

Fair point. See you soon then.

*Mercelida leaves, floating through the door. After opening it, of course. She soon returns carrying a photograph of some sort.*

: Well, this is all we have that we can give away. Don't worry as it seems that we have more copies at our castle.

*She hands it to Topaz. It seems to be her two daughters playing in a pool while wearing school swimsuits.*

Oh my, what cute lolis! I imagine that this could be very important to someone!

: Right! Like Zettai.

I imagine he'd prefer a picture of Mercelida bending over, showing her big butt. Bonus points if she's ripping one.

: Why would I rip up a picture of-OH! I understand, tee hee.

: Anyway, pictures aside how about we get back to the blog.

Sure thing. We're in the home stretch now!

*Topaz slips the photograph into his inventory.*

Personality: Mercelida is the third daughter of a royal family. Sadly her sisters, in their attempts to claim the throne for themselves, killed each other so Mercelida was made into the queen of her country. She might have a sexual mind and be somewhat lazy, but at least she's not an evil queen either as she genuinely does care for her people. Of course this includes supporting her two daughters Lotte and Asuha as well as Asuha's father/baby daddy Naoya. She's a really great mother even if she can't be with her children all the time. She might be carefree but as said she appreciates her family, even visiting and dropping off a gift for Asuha's birthday even if she had to do it stealthfully. She also used Naoya's, er, “seed” to return home one time when she was stuck in our world, which lead to him being an absurdly young father at 13.
Mercelida is voiced by Yuuko Minaguchi. She does a lot of great milf voices, though oddly I think her voice fit Mercelida better in the OVA where she's eighteen. That's just my personal opinion though. Overall Mercelida doesn't have anything too strong, but she's still a very great girl with a lot of great traits.
Grade: B

Libido: Of course Mercelida scores well here. She's a succubus with an amazingly large harem of “feeders”, but in all fairness I prefer a more “exclusive” romance (though in all fairness she does need “fluids” to survive, being a succubus and all). That said I'm fine with Mercelida taking pride in being sexualized by her soldiers. In fact, in the manga when the rebellion hit she was able to calm both sides by showing off her sexy body after they proclaimed their love and “use” of her figure. Mercelida does seem to have a favorite haremette/servant named Ursula. Yes that's a girl's name, but she's a futa anyway. Of course, the main appeal for me here is that Mercelida is a mother and specifically she seems to still have feelings for Naoya. Her daughter Lotte does marry him, but it seems that Mercelida will still stick around him.
Grade: A

Age: Mercelida does amazingly well here. She's 29, which while slightly out of my range isn't too far. Not only that but she's much older than her sorta-love interest Naoya, who is 23. Yes, that means that as an (approximate) eighteen-year old Mercelida seduced a then-thirteen Naoya into bed. Canon shotacom is great! I'll also add that we see her quite a bit in flashbacks, and within Mercelida's tenth and eleventh she seems to have had quite the, well, “explosive puberty” to say the least...
Grade: A+

Total Grades: 87
Average score: 9.7
Final Grade: A-

And that's the blog for this week!

: Oh man! Another high-scoring girl!

: Indeed, it's over 15 points higher than your friend gave me!

As said we do look at different things. Your high age certainly helped me while it was Zettai's lowest scoring area.

: Not to mention she has certain *ahem* PARTS, which seem to appeal to you more...

Regardless, Mercelida is another girl that gets a special image this year:

: Sad that you had to use fan art...

It is unfortunate that Mercelida does not have more official art. And I didn't want to have her naked and laying with a shota.

: Why not, ufufu? You seem to like that sort of thing.

I try not to have nudity.

: What a pure boy. But, since the blog is over I should get going. Hope to see you again!

*Mercelida waves and takes off again.*

Well, that's that.

: I'm surprised you let her leave so easily. She promised “fun” for you.

That's alright. I still have you.

: I-Idiot! Don't forget to give a hint about who you're doing next time.

I have no clue.

*Suddenly, Mercelida returns.*

: Big news everyone! Wait, the cameras are still here? A shame.

: How come you're back already? Forget the ribbon?

: No. I still have that. But I spoke with my handmaiden and it seems that she wants to be blogged next week as well.

: Great. Another cow.

: I take slight offense, but no matter. This isn't a cow. What would I do with a wetnurse anyway?

: To be sure I can't imagine you'd need one in the first place.

: Ufufu, a queen shouldn't have to do something like that. But no, this is a maid and not Elfleda anyway.

Wait, why isn't she coming up to ask for one herself.

: To put it gently she's a bit afraid to come in. After all, she doesn't have a voice for herself...

I think I understand what you're saying, and it seems we have a dark-skinned maid next time!
Posted by emperortopaz | May 12, 8:11 AM | 0 comments
May 5th, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-eighty-eighth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*Applause is heard as Topaz and Riri are sitting in an audience.*

Welcome back everyone! We just saw a performance, but as they didn't allow photography I had to wait until now to begin the blog.

: Sure, let's go with that. And not that you were lazy and didn't want to look up dancing videos.

That too, but more that I don't want the problem of having to make sure videos are up-to-date. Youtube is really picky about that type of thing.

: That's fair. Who knows how many dead links we have to various videos.

Hopefully none of the Pretty Cure girls have that problem. It's a good tradition to show their transformations and attacks.

: True. But speaking of blogs we really should get going.


: Wait, how are we going to see a famous idol like this? Don't tell me we're going to invade the sewers to sneak into her room!

Of course! If we could get in the sewers THAT easily we wouldn't need to get her autograph on a banana peel!

: This is no time to be quoting old SNES games!

Alright, but that means I can't mention this Backstage Pass!

: Where did you get that?

It was part of the tickets we were given, so let's go visit this week's girl!

*The two travel backstage.*

And we're here!

: Thank goodness for transitions.

: Hey, wait. Who are you and what are you doing back here?

I'm Emperortopaz, Topaz for short, and this is Ririchiyo, Riri for short.

: Hello.

: Well I'm Rin, and I don't have a shorter name!

You sure that Rin isn't short for "Oshirin"?

: I don't think parent would name their kid that. They'd know their child would be the butt of every joke.

: So should I call security or...

We're not suspicious!

: Don't say that! That's exactly what a suspicious person would say!

Then we are suspicious!

*Riri facepalms.*

: You can't say THAT either!

: Are you two a comedy duo? That show is another night.

We're here because we have backstage passes.

*Topaz flashes the SS Ticket, I mean Backstage Pass.*

: Ah, you're the ones who defeated the slime girl!

: Among many other people, but sure as that's what we were rewarded for anyway.

: Now I recognize you! You did a blog on Sumire!

Also Juri!

: And Aoi, and Yurika-wait, if the girls from this series don't usually do well why do you keep doing them?

Because a show like this is worth appreciating in blog-form. Besides, I can't expect kids shows to be showing ecchi situations.

: Right, because that's what other anime is ruined by!

Exactly! Wait, no. Only some of them.

: That's fair-Wait, didn't Bulma flash Muten Roshi her, well, "front" and show her bare butt to the audience fairly early on?

Dragon Ball is special, especially the first series.

: This is all so confusing...

: Topaz! We're confusing the blog girl! Get to business!

Alright then. Anyway, I'm here to ask for a blog.

: Well, since you did such a good job with Juri and Sumire's blogs I guess you could do mine as well.


: That was easier than I expected!

Are you complaining that we didn't get attacked?

: I suppose that is a good point...

Anyway, let's waltz into the blog as...

Today's girl is:

Rin Kurosawa

: That was a really forced joke, Topaz. (Don't scold Topaz for bad jokes! Y-you just want him to pay attention to you-NO! Bad Ririchiyo!)

But bad jokes are my forte!

: That's another idol-based joke! And I'm pretty sure I heard a drum roll after it...

Hair: Rin has surprisingly nice hair. Well, the length is good by my standards as it reaches a bit past her shoulders. The back is also fairly cool, with a wavy and layered look. What's surprising is that she has a fairly wide gap in her bangs, looking sort of like Iori from Idolm@ster with the same windswept look. It looks really regal and stylized, and the tip at the bottom of her bangs seems to be dyed a red which gives her a lot of unique style. Very few girls in anime seem to have streaks, and while I don't mind Rin's hair looks really nice with it. The rest of her hair is a nice platinum color too; I usually like darker hair, but whites and silvers look good too. Rin also wears a blue hairband most of the time as well, with a knot on the left side of her head. Overall while not normally something I'd be into I do appreciate how much Rin stands out from my usual tastes. Even at her first introduction I thought her hair was cool, and she quickly became one of my favorites from the second generation (though there was no topping Sumire still). There are also a few alternate hairstyles Rin has had. For example she has worn a ball cap at times, though she wears it sideways because she's from the streets, yo. There are also some occasions where she puts her hair up in a ponytail as well, such as the summer festival episode.
Grade: A-

Eyes: Rin also has fairly nice eyes. They're a nice tsurime shape, leaning inward though she does have a curve still. She also has somewhat sharp corner of her eye too, though I mean that as a good thing. Her eyelashes show but they're not too noticeable in the show itself. What is noticeable are her large eyebrows, though again those are more often a source of moe than anything else. I'm not too big on golden eyes with non-KDEG girls, but for Rin they really work well with her hair and are fairly pretty. It might help that they have a gradient with orange or brown in them too. Like quite a few girls in this series Rin is awesome and wears glasses when out in public! They have thick frames too, though only they do only have the underframe portion. That said they make her look better and smarter too, no offense meant of course. Sadly near the end she starts getting recognized even in glasses, so I hope she would continue wearing them anyway.
Grade: B+

Face: Rin has a great face, I think it's a really nice artstyle as all the girls are cute. That said her face is mostly similar to the other girls, not that I mind as the small features such as her nose are things I enjoy. She also seems to have fairly soft cheeks, adding a bit of shape to her face. I suppose that she does show her forehead a lot, but that's more something for “hair” and a feature I don't mind in Rin's case. Speaking of hair though I did forget to mention that her left ear shows due to her hair being pulled back on that side. It doesn't look bad but did need to be added. Of course we can't forget Rin being cute either. During her introduction episode she gets so flustered that her entire face turns bright red, and her face steams up as well. It was adorable, and shows how even the cool Rin can get embarrassed when complimented.
Grade: A-

Build: Sadly this is where most Aikatsu/Precure girls tend to suffer. Rin isn't too much different from the other Aikatsu girls, having a fairly standard teenage body without much curve at all. She does have somewhat thick thighs, but otherwise she's fairly slender and unimpressive for my tastes. She also shows her navel during the beach episode, but sadly we don't get a shot of her from behind. I will say that her robotic-like dance does look really cool, and in general she loves dancing so she must be in shape well.
Grade: C

Breasts: Like most Aikatsu girls she doesn't do too well here either. Rin is slender here as well, though I am impressed she wears such a tight top during the beach episode.
Grade: D

Clothes: Rin is usually seen in the Starlight Academy uniform, though she has a lot more outfits. As said before (and copy/pasted): The Starlight Academy school uniform, consists of a dark blue top coat with a white shirt inside, a red ribbon around the collar with a gold button, and a white skirt with a dark blue line and two buckles. On the shirt are four gold buttons, with the top and bottom two connected by a chain. I may have forgotten to mention, but there's a summer uniform that consists of a white sailor shirt with fluffy shoulders, a red ribbon and gold buckle around the neck, and a blue skirt. Rin seems to enjoy practicing in a track suit, and in general seems to wear a lot of pants so that's a good thing. She's even counted as a “track suit alien” in one of the drama special-episodes. As far as her brand she wears outfits from Dance Fusion. There's a lot of great outfits, I like the dark colors (especially blues), and in general I like the slightly futuristic designs (though not as futuristic as Futuring Girl). She also wears a cool headset with one dress set which has a variety of colors that change through the performance.
Rin has a lot of cool casual outfits too. She has a particularly nice “street” outfit that consists of a green shirt with neck though lacking sleeves, black shorts, backpack, and white boots with heels (even if I'm not too fond of heels). She also wears a white and green kimono during the summer festival. Rin also has a shirt with a picture of a record which she wears off-center, exposing her shoulder. With that she wears pants with a line on them, and the shirt with Rin's hairband really makes me think she has a lot of inspiration from the 80's-90's culture. She also has a nice casual outfit which includes a green shawl with yellow collar, white shirt under that with a red collar and plaid cuffs, a matching plaid necktie, red skirt with black belt, and tall boots (though not knee-tall). There's also the beach episode where she wears a bikini. The bottoms are perfect, being tight and reminding me of blue buruma even if they're tied on the sides of her hips. Wish she would have shown off a bit more, though. The top I'm not as fond of; it's a tube top that is the same color as her bottom, though it has a big frill on the bottom. I suppose that they wanted to make it a bit more feminine, but that seems like it would get in the way. That said it Rin is the only one without a strapless top, but unfortunately I do prefer straps. Overall, even if her bikini isn't the best Rin still has a lot of great outfits and looks great in all of them.
Grade: B+

*Ririchiyo sighs.*

What's the matter now?

: I still can't believe that you still can't appreciate the beauty of a middle school girl. N-not that I care, I don't need your approval to call me beautiful. But for her sake.

In all fairness I probably would have judged better if she had shown her body off more. Like with Yurika getting that nice buttshot!

*Rin is bright red, with her hands on her cheeks.*

: J-just thinking about it makes me...

: Stop that Topaz! You're going to make the innocent idol overheat!

Hey, I wasn't the one who brought it up! Though I do admit that the standards could use some work. But I imagine that wouldn't happen at some random blog and instead happen at a notable number. So it's not going to happen anytime soon.

*Rin cools down and returns to normal.*

: H-hey. Let's get back to the blog!

I agree, we've gotten sidetracked so let's finish up!

Personality: Rin was first introduced when she joins Starlight Academy later in the third season. She's introduced as a street dancer, with the nickname “Dancing Bolt” (or “Dancing Lightning”, depending on the translation). She also loves to dance, sometimes moving her feet while standing around. She soon becomes one of the best dancers in the school and gets paired up with Sumire who is one of the best songstresses to create “Dancing Diva”. Later on she joins with Madoka and Juri to create “Vanilla Chili Pepper”, being the “pepper” portion as she loves things such as pepper steak and black pepper. Speaking of food Rin enjoys deep fried Shiratama anmitsu and it's said that's her favorite food. Rin's character color seems to be navy blue, though sometimes it's show as black.
As far as personality goes Rin is a cool and refreshing girl. She has an easily embarrassed side and she still is energetic, but in general she's a great character as she makes what would normally be something I'd consider a flaw really fun. Her catchphrase is “Resonate! The BPM of her heart!”. I'll also say that her voice really appeals to me. Yuuki Takada does a really fitting voice for Rin, being cool but not emotionless and really beautiful-sounding. Overall she's definitely one of my favorites from the second generation, and I would have wished to have seen her more (like Juri she does get pushed back for the main trio). I also find it funny yet unfortunate that my top three third-gen characters (Rin, the Hokkaido-girl Risa, and Sumire) were ranked in places 6-8 out of the eight named characters for the Starlight Queen. Alright, so I understand Sumire falling, but Rin and Risa could have done better (at least Juri did well, ranking first for the first two days xD).
Grade: B

Libido: As a kids show Aikatsu doesn't go too far into relationships. That said Rin does have a lot of potential partners. The biggest one is certainly Madoka. They're roommates and came at about the same time, being nearly inseparable as the show goes on. There's even an episode based around the two having to start doing separate things, but their friendship continuing on. Continuing with Vanilla Chili Pepper, which is a unit consisting of Madoka and Rin, there are some interactions between Rin and the third member Juri. That said it would be a bit more of a stretch for that pairing. In other idol groups we can't forget about her and Sumire being a part of Dancing Diva. Sumire was also the one that made Rin realize teamwork up on stage. I'd love if those two got together as they're my top two second-gen girls, but I doubt that would happen as Sumire seems to like Akari more (still, Dancing Diva is a great duo). Rin even has a childhood friend that we saw in an episode named Minami that was the one to teach her about dancing. Finally, Rin is a big fan of Johnny Bepp, but it's more respect and adoration than actual “libido”. That said, it is fair that a lot of her relations are more subtle but still.
Grade: C+

Age: Rin is 13 when she's introduced, and ages up to 14 as the series progresses. She's a year behind the other girls, despite being the same “age”, because of how Japanese schools are. Rin was born on January 1st so she had to wait a bit longer to start school.
Grade: C

Total Grades: 64
Average score: 7.1
Final Grade: B-

And that's the blog for this week!

: Hey! That's less than Sumire and Juri got! What gives?

It's alright, it's not like you're that far under them. And it doesn't mean that I like you less than them either. Okay, so I do favor Sumire but still it's not enough to get angry about.

: Right, that's about what Yurika got.

And you're still in the 60's which is a fair point for most middle school girls from series for young girls are.

: I suppose that is a good point. Besides, the sixties were famous for the twist and-

*Rin gets up and does a few poses with fancy footwork.*

: I can't be mad at any sort of dance!

Glad you're alright with the score.

: Of course, just getting blogged on is a major compliment!

: Just be glad you weren't a villain either.

: Thank goodness about that too, though I'll be seeing you two perhaps again.

Sounds like a plan, but for now we must be going.

: From Topaz and I, we bid farewell.

: Laters!

*Topaz and Riri leave the backstage area and take a train back home. On the way, a conversation comes up.*

: Wait a minute! You forgot to say who you are doing next time!

Heh heh heh. Luckily I've planned out a perfect girl!

: Don't leave me in suspense! Tell me-er, I mean our readers. Yeah.

Well, since Sunday is Mother's Day I'm going to be doing the traditional mother blog. And it's a mother that my reader likes too!

: But wait! You've done Rinko already. And Cattleya.

Yeah but-

*Ririchiyo puts on thick glasses, adjusting them slightly. Then she pulls out a legal pad and flips through the pages.*

: And Irisviel. And Akiko. And Fate, by technicality. And it's not like Ringo had enough screentime for a good enough blog. Same with most of the PreCure mothers. That's not even counting you still have to finish Suite if you'd even want to do Aphrodite. Since we're talking about mothers from shows you haven't finished we can't forget Chichi or Masane that wouldn't be able to be done.

*Topaz looks at the listing and flips pages. He then points at a name.*

There. She's the one that I meant.

: I suppose that she counts well enough. He does seem to like her, even did a blog on her earlier this year.

Exactly, so I bet that all our reader will be looking forward to it!

: I'll keep a close watch so that nothing vulgar happens. Especially considering the girl...
Posted by emperortopaz | May 5, 8:14 AM | 0 comments
April 28th, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-eighty-seventh week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*Topaz and Ririchiyo walk through the arena backstage area.*

Wow, I'm surprised that we didn't get stopped on the way here.

: Certainly, but I imagine that it's because you're lazy.

Perhaps. And for those of you just tuning in we're at the Grand Arena. It's a new part of the Colosseum that Aldra controls.

: New part nothing. I'm pretty sure this “Grand Arena” is just a fancier name for the old section.

So that's why it looks familiar. But to finish we're here to face Melona as she's finally challenged us to a one-on-one battle.

: She challenged YOU. Otherwise a two-on-one battle would seem unfair.

Good point. But at least you're here for moral support.

*Topaz rubs Ririchiyo's head.*

: Hey, stop that! I didn't say that you could touch me!

Fine fine.

*The two continue out to the center. A cheering crowd greets them, and Melona is standing in the middle of the arena. She smirks once she sees Topaz coming out.*

: I'm glad that you weren't so intimidated by my challenge that you ran away. Having you here will at least keep me entertained for a while.

But why are you bothering me?

: That's none of your concern.

I think it is. You DID attack me a lot.

: I just needed someone to play with. And young boys like you and Zettai are so much fun to toy with.

: Careful Topaz! She might be plotting a devious trick!

: Awww, you give me too much credit. But even without a silly trick I can still defeat an idiot like you! In fact, since I'm curious how about you do a blog on me first? Might as well do a great beauty such as myself before you end.

*Meanwhile, up in the VIP room Aldra clenches her fist and slams it against the arm of her throne.*

: That Melona is stalling again!

: She's never been someone who enjoyed listening to rules.

: I hope that she shall not regret asking Topaz to do such a thing...

: I doubt it. Topaz is honorable and wouldn't attack her without warning. However, it does give him time to prepare...

*Aldra hits a few buttons and a microphone emerges from her throne.*

: MELONA! What do you think you're doing? Destroy Topaz this instant!

: Nag nag nag. You never let me have any fun. Even if you are Aldra-sama doesn't mean I have to obey EVERYTHING you say.

: You dare betray me?

: Betray nothing. I respect you giving me a chance, so allow me to take my time.

: *Angry* FINE! But you shall not get any help from me!

: I wouldn't want it any other way!

*Melona turns to Topaz, who has entered the arena. Between them a cloud of smoke appears and a fox demon girl announcer appears.*

: Is everyone ready to BATTLE?!

Oh, haven't I seen you before?

: That's right! I work for Aldra, but only in purposes pertaining to the Colosseum. Hey, haven't I seen you here?

Sure! A few times, no less!

: Neat. *To audience.* Well then, it seems that Topaz wants to do his blog before facing Melona. Hopefully those bloodthirsty members in the audience can handle the wait! But I imagine that the Grand Arena, one of the three new arenas, will be the place for a major battle today!


: Yes, didn't you know? There's the Grand Arena, the Terrain Arena, and the Forge Arena. But enough exposition. I'm sure everyone knows what we're really here for...

Today's girl is:

Queen's Blade

*The audience cheers.*

Hey! That's my job!

: Let other people announce the girls once in a while. Sheesh...

Fine, saves me work. But as the announcer says let's begin...

Hair: Melona has fairly neat hair. Sure it's pink, but it actually looks really good and fits with her character as well as outfit a lot. Plus I like how her bunny ear-like protrusions look when pink. I'm not a big fan of the Lime green variety in the game books, but luckily she doesn't use that in the actual series. Style-wise Melona is pretty nice too, she has huge wavy hair that looks really pretty. It goes until right above her hips, meaning it's a perfect length. She even has a really nice hime cut too! As mentioned before she has rabbit-like ears that look really soft and squishy, and thanks to her shapeshifting abilities she has a lot of varieties with her disguises. Even including wings in one image. About the only problem is with her sides, but it is a major one. While the sides themselves aren't bad, reaching her chest and making her hime cut look better, I really dislike the fact that her hair ends in hands that are used to support her chest. Barely support at that, and while more of a clothing issue (I'll probably talk about it there too) it's one of the things I dislike about Melona.
Grade: B+

Eyes: Her eyes aren't too great either. While she can change the shape of her eyes, she's unable to change the color. This is a bad thing as Melona has blue eyes like an unfair number of characters in her cast. She also usually has a tarame, which isn't exactly great for my tastes. She also has notable eyelashes, though they aren't too much of a problem. Melona also has flower-shaped pupils. I don't usually enjoy objects in eyes either, but considering the supernatural nature she has and the fact that it's black and actually look like pupils I don't mind too much. Technically I actually enjoy it as it helps notice the differences between Melona being disguised as someone and the person themselves (though I'm not sure if her transformation in Rebellion was noticeable). While she didn't do it in the show, that I remember, she does shapeshift into Cattleya in one official image. While nothing major having a canon shot of Melona, even if transformed, in glasses is nice. It also means that she can form glasses with transformations, though that's just me thinking of my tastes xD.
Grade: B-

Face: Again Melona can change shape here too. Shapeshifters are hard to blog on xD. Luckily Melona is a fairly cute character in her base form and doesn't look bad at all. She does have a fairly sizable nose which I'm not a fan of. She also has rosy cheeks as well as what seems to be lipstick around her mouth. Hmm, combined with the eyelashes it does look like she's wearing make-up in general, but she probably just makes herself look like that as it sorta fits her carefree attitude. Anyway her head looks acorn-like and is framed nicely by her hair. And hey, at least she looks feminine which is more than I can say about Cattleya!
Grade: B

Build: As with the previous areas, Melona can alter her body shape at will. This means that she does not have set measurements, unlike the other characters. That said her base form seems similar to a lot of other characters from the same series, at least the non-loli ones. She does have great legs and butt, the latter of which has a particularly spectacular shot in the second series ending. Really, her butt looks really rounded and soft-looking which is great!She really has an extremely sensual and beautiful body, really, and the series certainly doesn't hide it either. I suppose that I should count her tiny travel-size version when she becomes weakened, but that's balanced out by becoming a giantess in the manga. Overall she has an amazing body and the ability to change it at will makes her even more interesting!
Grade: A-

Breasts: Sadly Melona does not have a perfect body as this is where her problems are. While not too bad compared to some other girls, Melona still has a fairly large chest. It's one of the reasons she should require much more support than her “hands” can handle, pun unintended. Her walk cycle is fairly bouncy from what I can tell, which it probably wouldn't be if she had more support. But the main problem is, of course, that she shoots acid breast milk at opponents. This is a very silly thing and it's brought to ridiculous levels in the first episode no less. You see, Reina presses against Melona's chest and keeps her from spraying. As a result Melona gets huge breasts, to the point of exploding. As this is the first episode I wonder if a lot of people's opinions were judged just based on this poor (if goofy) scene. Speaking of expansion there's also a scene where it's revealed that she was disguised as Ymir through Rebellion. This comes with a scene of Melona returning to normal, starting sadly with her chest. That's also not counting that for whatever reason Ymir can become bustier in Rebellion with a transformation and it's double the horrible surprise. Overall Melona isn't too big, but her problems certainly are.
Grade: C

Clothes: Melona actually does fairly well here. As mentioned before she keeps her chest contained in her hair-hands. It's a very unique look, but due to the lack of support I dislike it. Other than that I don't mind her outfit, which is a transparent pink dress that fits her well. Especially as you can see her butt and she doesn't wear underwear (I think the front is blocked, fortunately). She also has a lot of variety as she can also transform her clothing. First I'll mention the outfits from the specials. First is her pink and white sailor outfit (as the specials are set in a school); while not bad and I like her bow I dislike how she still has her “hands full”, to say the least. She also wears pink panties with it, though they are wedgied up her butt. In the second season specials she seems to wear a black bikini, including top for once! In the Rebellion books she seems to wear a more queenly gown, a shame as it doesn't show her bum as well but I do like how her hands are supporting her chest from below as well as her larger sleeves. As far as transformations go, she has images where she's disguised as Irma, Elina in a leopardess outfit, Reina, Nowa, Tomoe, and Listy and she also disguises as Ymir (as said before). Other outfits include a geisha kimono, a barely-covered catgirl, a race queen with an umbrella, a Chinese dress, a gambler with cards, a maid, and a dragon. Considering Queen's Blade characters aren't known for their numerous outfits, usually at best having two, Melona's great variety is a great thing.
Grade: A-

Personality: Melona is a servant of the Swamp Witch, the main villain of the series. In particular she's good at espionage, which includes obtaining information and assassinations (the latter gives her the nickname “Protean Assassin” though she goes by “Protean Trickster” in Rebellion). As said quite a bit this is helped by Melona being a shapeshifting slime. That said, even though she's a servant she likes having fun over being obedient and serious. She likes toying around with others, especially in battle. This is because she's extremely strong and her slime-like body makes her nearly invulnerable. She could be described as being a little childish as she has the occasional outburst, but that just makes her more entertaining. She's willing to work with anyone but only if it benefits her. That said, don't call her a “monster” as that makes her upset. Overall, she makes for a good villain but we really don't have much of a backstory and she's relatively simple overall. Not a bad thing, mind you, but she makes for an interesting character.
Playing against her usual roles Melona is voiced by Rie Kugimiya. She portrays Melona's great, flirty personality well and I really like it. It's very seductive as well. That said it does cause some oddness as Rana is also portrayed by Kugimiya (though that lends itself well to one of Melona's disguises).
Grade: B

Libido: On one hand Melona is extremely perverse and sadistic. She's a very flirty and fun-loving girl that loves to tease others (especially toying with her opponents). Not only that but she doesn't have a problem with nudity. On the other hand she does suffer a bit as she really doesn't have a steady pairing. I suppose that Reina may count, due to being her first opponent in the series, but other than that she doesn't seem to have any set pairings.
Grade: B+

Age: Melona sadly has no official age. That said as a slime she likely doesn't age and she has the base figure of a young adult which works well here. Again Rebellion did hurt somewhat with the Ymir reveal, but I already punished her once for that.
Grade: B

Total Grades: 74
Average score: 8.2
Final Grade: B

And that's the blog for this week!

: WHAT THE?! I was expecting a better score than Zettai gave! What gives!

We do have different criteria, remember. Just because we're friends doesn't mean that we have to like the same things.

: Right. Like how Zettai has good tastes and Topaz is dumb and mamocentric!

Only sometimes! It's not my fault I'm extremely weak-willed...

: Don't worry. You won't have to feel bad for long. Take THIS!

*Melona swings her fist at Topaz, but he barely evades.*


: Not so fast!

*She changes the shape of her arm, wrenching it back and smacking her fist against Topaz's head. He takes 15 damage.*

: Oh no! Topaz!

Don't worry!

: Did you see that everyone? Melona is certainly using her transformation powers well in this battle! How will Topaz survive? Or will he not? Let's continue and find out!

Take THIS!

*Topaz tries to smack Melona in the back, but the slime girl expands her butt huge. As a result Topaz airbags off it and falls down. He stands up quickly.*

That's one huge tushie! My attacks bounce right off!

: Wahaha! What's the matter? Too distracted to fight?

Nonsense! I will stand my ground with honor!

: Quick, attack her chest! As a busty girl she deserves it!

Great plan! I might not have Rika's latest attack, but getting slapped would probably still hurt.

*Topaz goes and attempts to slap Melona's large breasts. However, she sucks them in and becomes flat chested. As a result Topaz stumbles forward, barely able to stay standing.*

: How foolish. Announcing what you're going to do beforehand while in earshot won't work! Though I do admit that I like this figure. Maybe I'll go tease Zettai with it, as he can appreciate my slim slimy beauty.

That's true, and he deserves all the fun he can get. Unfortunately, I have to defeat you here!

: HA!

*Melona returns to normal off-camera so dumb expansion isn't shown.*

: I've just been TOYING with you. I haven't even used the attack I'm most known for!

Oh no.

: You can't be serious!

We can't show that, this is a clean blog! Er, mostly, I guess. At the very least we have rules about what we can show, and that type of thing is a no-go!


Rules aren't eggs!

: Who cares, now prepare to die!

*Koto's head takes up half the screen, so that Melona is not seen. However, the assassin shoots her acid at Topaz and his evasion is seen.*

: Wow! What an, er, unorthodox style of fighting... Topaz is really on the ropes now!

: Topaz! Watch out!

What do you think I've been doing?!

*Melona keeps up her attack.*

: Mwahaha! What do you think of me NOW?!

You really ask me that while I'm being attacked?

: Fair point, but if you grovel to me and allow me to hand you over to Aldra this will be all over!

Never. I won't let the villain win!

: Suit yourself!

*Melona starts destroying the ground. Soon there's a large outcropping from the stones of the Arena getting lopsided.*

: Wow! What poor aim! Luckily there's a splash guard for our crowd in such an attack!

*The screen focuses on Melona about to hit the crowd with random acid spray, but magical barriers protect them.*

: But how can Topaz stand to defeat this Vicious Viscous Villain?!

*Topaz's eyes light up.*

Viscous... wait a second...

: Oh? Do you have some sort of idea to fight back? About time! You can't evade all day, and I'm getting bored just being a long-range shooter. Come, give me your best shot!


*Topaz puts his hand in his pants, and the whole arena flinches and boos.*

: REALLY TOPAZ?! Is this the best time for that?

: I know! Weren't you just just complaining about her attack?!

: Don't worry, ufufu. I bet I cause that reaction a lot.

It's not what you all are thinking. And they call me a pervert.

: You are.

Fair, but that's not my intent this time! Melona, take THIS!

*Topaz throws an object at Melona, but she forms her arms together to make a tower shield-sized defense.*

: You fool! I said that I can block any attack!

*However the sound of glass breaking and falling to the floor is heard.*

: H-huh... I'm feeling... funny...

*Suddenly Melona's butt becomes huge and balloon-like. It's at least twice the usual size.*

: What the?!

: What just happened?! We've seen Melona transform before, BUTT this seems caused by Topaz's attack.

That it was!

: I'm not sure how you got my body to do this, or why. I mean, other than looking sexy as all get out, but this doesn't give you any tactical advantage.

That's what you think!

*Topaz runs behind Melona, who turns much slower than normal due to her inflated backside.*

: Huff... Huff...

What's the matter? Why are you... DRAGGING YOUR BUTT?!

: That's not funny! Stop moving so fast too!

Plus your large trunk gives me the perfect target for THIS!

*Topaz throws another item from his pants, and hits Melona's jiggly slime butt. Again the sound of glass breaking is heard.*

: So you've got some more of those things. I'm not quite sure what they are, but-


*Melona lets out a huge fart.*

: Oh gag! How smelly and loud!

: You know Topaz, you cater to Zettai far too much.

More like I don't cater to him enough, considering all the problems I cause him. And those aren't even all the problems he has to go through either!

: Hey! Get your head back in the battle. Or I'll defeat you by sitting on you with my huge butt!

As great as that sounds, I can't be defeated here. Though, *cough* I probably shouldn't be standing behind you...

*Melona continues to fart repeatably.*

: Oh come on! They aren't even as bad as Airi's!

*Another voice over the loudspeaker is heard.*

: This isn't the time to say that! Stop embarrassing me publicly!

Right, don't be distracted and keep your head in the battle!

: You don't need to use my words against me! Here, take more firing!

*Melona prepares to “aim” again. Before she succeeds to “reveal” Topaz tosses a third glass item at her. As a result her breasts become so huge they drag, rendering her “weapons” useless.*

: How gross!

You're telling me! But strategically it works.

: Wow! At first it seemed like Melona had the upper hand, but whatever Topaz has been tossing at her seems to be affecting her coloring and body.

: You'll pay for ruining me like this!

I think I have the upper hand here! More mass means I don't have to aim as well!

*Topaz hits Melona while she's distracted. Her whole body trembles.*


*Then Melona becomes a giantess, towering over him.*

Wait, no! This should be against the rules!

: Worked for a certain green guy.

: Yeah, but they don't pay me enough to deal with this. I'm outta here!

*The announcer escapes towards the entrance.*

: MWAHAHAHA! Seems your random items have paid off in my favor! Now to squish you easily!

Oh yeah? Remember what I said about mass?

: Oh no...

That's right!

*Topaz takes two more items out of his inventory and throws both at Melona. Even though his accuracy would suffer he manages to hit with both.*

: I can barely feel such tiny specks. You'll never be able to defeat...FFFFWWWRRRPPP-er, defeat me!

*Melona goes to step on Topaz. However, instead she grows a beard.*


*Melona's body then rumbles the entire arena.*


: What?!

No time to explain!

*Topaz ducks behind the outcropping from before.*

: Fine then.

*Riri hides in the entrance to the arena. Just as she makes it Melona explodes with a loud BANG, covering the entire Arena with pink slime. Koto sticks her head out.*

: Er, well... Seems that Topaz is the victor here.

*Meanwhile, up in the VIP room Aldra stands up and walks away without saying a word.*

: Are you not going to say a word for her?

: *Without turning around* Harumph. She got what she deserved. She misjudged Topaz, and put her life on the line. She failed, and failing is not an option for my troops.

: But...

: Oh, and Airi. Clean up that mess. I don't need goop all over my precious Arena.

: But...

*Aldra turns, trying hard to keep from crying and yet a tear forms.*

: Are you going to betray me TOO?

: ... No, Aldra-sama.

*Aldra marches off. Back in the arena.*

*The crowd cheers. Ririchiyo also runs out to Topaz.*

: Congratulations! You defeated Melona! But what happened? What were those items you were throwing?


*Topaz pulls out a mostly empty case of vials.*

: Huh?

Remember the potions we got a while ago from Touko?

: Touko... Oh, the invisible school nurse... WAIT! You mean to say that all of Melona's transformations-

That's right! They were the effects of the various potions!

: But I thought you had to drink them for them to work...

Ah yes, but you have to remember that Melona is a slime. As a result any fluid that hits her would take affect immediately.

: Is that why she exploded too?

No, that was potion miscibility.

: Potion Mis-ability?

Miscibility. It means that the various ingredients in the potions worked against each other in such a way that it caused a giant explosion. I'm just lucky that it happened then, as I only have one potion remaining now...

*He pulls it out, showing off the label “INV.”*

: Hmmm, it's fortunate as giving Melona Invincibility would have made her unbeatable.

She'd be a Star, man!

: That was a horrible joke...

: Ahem!

Oh, you're still here?

: Of course. While Melona had you ending the blog as a wish if she won you get a prize as well.

Well then, I wish Melona was-

: We can't do that sort of thing.

Aww. Well then, I guess I just wish for some free time for relaxing.

: What a coincidence then.

*She hands Topaz two tickets.*

: I just happen to have these tickets to an idol show for next week. Why don't you take your girlfriend over there?

: I'm not a girlfriend!

And besides, how do we know that this isn't a trick?

: I'm not working THAT hard for Aldra...

Fair point. And look Riri, it's for a certain Dancing Bolt!

: Eh? Melotta used Thunderbolt?

Close, but not quite... But anyway, thanks for this prize.

: Welcome, thanks for the great battle. I'm sure that the fans enjoyed it!

Indeed. But it seems that this is where the blog ends for this week. Join us next time!

Posted by emperortopaz | Apr 28, 8:09 AM | 0 comments
April 21st, 2016
This is the Three-hundredth-eighty-sixth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*We join Topaz and Ririchiyo outside his house. He is holding a box of donuts and opens the door.*

Welcome back everyone. I'm finally returning home today.

: Hopefully Rika and Topaz haven't been having wild parties.

*Rika greets them.*

: Welcome home, Ni-pah~

How adorable!

*Rika's eyes glare at Topaz as he attempts to hug her cute loli body.*

: Don't even think about it.

Fine then.

: Still, welcome back. And same to you too, Ririchiyo. I assume that it was hard work keeping him on track.

: Honestly dealing with all the girls trying to kill Topaz was more difficult.

: Sounds interesting. Let's talk about it in the living room.

Certainly. Here, let me put down this box of donuts I got as an apology in the kitchen.

*Topaz sets them down on the counter and the three of them sit down in the living room.*

Now, it all started with-

*A loud crashing noise comes from the outside, as if something broke into Topaz's house.*

Oh no! Not again!

: I knew we shouldn't have come back while there were still attempts after your life!

: Quick, check the bathroom! That's where they came last!

*The trio rushes to the bathroom. It seems pristine.*

Wow, the government really returned this to the former glory after January.

: Now isn't the time to appreciate our washroom. There's someone attacking!

Good point!

*The three rush to the bedroom, but no one seems to have broken in.*

Phew, looks like no one is here.

: Of course. You're bedroom will never make noise! (Er, that wasn't too mean I hope...)

Nice joke, though I'm alright and proud of that. But if it wasn't one of these rooms where could it be?

: The kitchen!

But isn't that a little overdone? I mean, with all the girls breaking through that way can't I come up with anything better?

*The trio hurry to the kitchen. There, they see a large hole and a girl with long dark hair sitting with a sword.*

Oh come on!

: Well, I guess that at this point it's more of a running joke. And like Working you sure love your running jokes!

But she burst through the wall and is probably going to kill me!

: Not only that, but she ate ALL the donuts!

*Rika shakes the donut box and only crumbs come out.*

: That fiend!

: Go show her the arrow of her ways, Topaz!

Don't you mean "error" of her-

*Topaz turns back and sees Rika trying to arm a crossbow.*

: What? That's not the saying?

We're not going to shoot her with a crossbow!

: Agreed. While ignoring Topaz's poor excuse for strength we need to save the uses on those weapons for a better time!

Besides, where did you find that?

: I have a lot of torture devices laying around.

I guess people really do have odd collections. Hey, do you have a morning star?

: Two, in fact. Though one is in pretty rough shape.

Well then, get the good morning star.

: Alright then!

*Rika goes off to get it while Riri facepalms.*

: You just wanted to use that joke didn't you... I mean sheesh, "Good Morning" star...

Hey, I know a guy who beat up an alien invasion with one! Well, by that point it was a Shooting Star but still...

: This is no time to be talking about retro NES games!

I thought that was almost all we talk about during blogs?

: NO!

*The assassin pops the last bit of donut in her mouth.*

???: Now that I am out of donuts it is time for you to face me!

*She stands up and draws her katana. She then lunges at Topaz, who barely avoids it.*

: Who is this even?!

Can't you tell? I mean her show was fairly recent...

Posted by emperortopaz | Apr 21, 7:14 AM | 0 comments