ZettaiRyouiki's Blog

Back to ZettaiRyouiki's Blog

WARNING: BECAUSE OF REASONS I MUST TELL EVERYONE UNDER THE AGE OF 18 TO GET OUT OF MY BLOG! OBEY OR I’LL BE DEFENESTRATED! ALSO BE WARY OF WILD ROAMING SPOILERS! YOU’VE BEEN WARNED!

Welcome back. Last time Haruhi told me the culprit was a giantess so I quickly went after the now much more interesting villain. On our chase this girl showed up and offered gladly her help on this.

: Leave the great Kyouka on the case! Together we shall find this girl in no time at all!

: So... who is this girl?

Well, mistress, sadly her show is not popular so no wonder you are in the dark, but the identity of this maiden is none other than...



: That is me all right! Ha ha hah!

: So why are you helping us?

: Because by chance my family and I came to Spain in vacation and as the mother of my children no one who tries to ruin our vacations will be forgiven!

Makes perfect sense, well done!

: Certainly... MOTHER?

: What, you want to be another of my children too?

: No, I mean... You’re a mother? You barely look older I do...

: Chiaki, nowadays lolimoms are all the rage. Look at Testament, Teekyuu or even Okusama.

: Good point, so this must be some hipster lolimom.

: What’s a hipster?

Something bad.

: Hmmm, that tells me nothing but bet I’m not that anyway. Anyway, do one of these blogs of yours about me and I will help you gladly, well-trained pig!

Why is that?

: Well, first I want to know how you feel about me and my beloved family as just because you happen to be the main character I cannot side with you that easily.

Sounds fair. If only other shows would be fairer with the main character...

: Hey, some of us light novel leads are NOT broken overpowered Sues even if that is quite rare! At least all my power is for comedy.

Head

Hair
Kyouka has dark purple hair. Sometimes it looks dark blue, but nope. The main issue is of course her hair is too short, not even reaching her shoulders. She also has the typical big bang with smaller ones many girls have, but the sides framing her face look quite cute at least. She also has an ahoge, but this one is special as it lets her talk with others telepathically in an ability named Mobile Phone for reasons. The best trait and perhaps saving grace is her cat ears, matching her hair and looking lovely. That might explain at last the framing hair. Overall Kyouka’s hair is fine but could be better.
Grade: B

Eyes
Kyouka has green eyes. While not the most original color, is better than more blue and goes really well with her hair color. The shape of her eyes is actually variable though maybe the show’s low budget is the culprit. Anyway Kyouka’s eyes are somewhere between tsurime and tareme normally, with bold moments giving her tsurime while sweeter ones go with tareme instead. Kind of unique at least. Wish she had glasses much like her husband but otherwise not too bad.
Grade: B

: Cat ears are adorable, right? *puts on some*

: What, are you trying to be like the great Kyouka? You will need a tail as well!

: But my slave prefers the “tail hole” to be usable...

: Let’s just change the topic, please. *also wears cat ears for no reason*

: Hmmm... Interesting more holes can be used.

Body

Build
Kyouka has a great body. Despite being an adult she has a lolish body which is simply the best, and is officially described as looking like a middle schooler which makes things even better. Of course that means she has a glorious flat chest though is so unsatisfied that she does bust up exercises despite her husband liking it so boo such horrible corruption of mind caused by mamocentrism. Her flat stomach also looks great and for the art style her legs are pretty good. And of course she has cat ears and tail for more appeal; sure dog ears and the like are more my thing but cat fits Kyouka more so nothing wrong. Pretty much the only issue sadly is the art style and her really simple face. See, faces do matter albeit rarely so. Also in the novels she gets pregnant and pregnant lolis look really off.
Grade: A

Butt
Kyouka actually has some nice shots of this thanks to her spats, but the best shots would be of course her ED ones as the first 10 seconds of it are just Kyouka shaking her ass in tight clothes with nice close-ups for even more appeal. On top of that her bare ass gets shown in the mandatory springs scene, which was a nice surprise! Shame shows have gone downhill ever since.
Grade: C+

: Think that you meant downBUTTE here now!

Good catch! Love your ideas!

: Of course! Who you think I am again? *shakes her ass in pride*

: A pervert.

Clothes
Kyouka has some awesome variety of clothes. Her default costume is a pink and beige dress with short puffy sleeves and a huge cat bell near her neck. Note she has cat bells with most costumes and also has smaller ones in wristbands. She improves this nice costume with black thighhighs along beige and red shoes. She also has a similar dress though colored red and with the skirt being shaped differently. Kyouka has another nice normal costume consisting of a sleeveless orange T-shirt and spats; go spats! Beside all of these she has more occasional costumes: from her ED but also used elsewhere this includes token bikini in this case orange and pretty cute, wedding dress, explorer of sorts, pink frilly waitress with white thighhighs, cute space soldier, sweater school uniform because of course, various cat fursuits plus a jellyfish one, and sukumizu because school swimsuits are love. So much she wears a white one too, and also the famous magical girl costume with lots of pink and frills and exposed navel and lovely bells looking nice on her hair as well. Overall Kyouka is solid in this and deserves love.
Grade: A-

Mind

Personality
Kyouka is the “mother” in Operation Cozy Family, which takes all the possible children of the dead God of Destruction Enka and makes them live together as a family of sorts to make sure they become nice instead of naughty. If this plot sounds wacky note the author also did Sasami-san and everything will make more sense. As in it will become clear this guy is nuts, the plots will still be insane. Presumably Kyouka is the mother as the oldest female around, despite being the shortest in the family. Before this quite nuts plan started Kyouka was hailed as the god of the Underground Empire which explains so much about her personality, and she was named Kyoukya Eaeriaea instead. As is obvious now she prefers her crazy family. From what I gathered she was the younger sister from Enka named Vanessa El Dragon who got sealed in a baby’s body and then left for said Underground Empire to do the rest. Crazy stuff.

Due to being worshipped during years Kyouka is really smug and proud, often pushing some of her wacky ideas on others though nothing too bad. In fact despite this fairly arrogant behavior Kyouka is a kind person who really cares for her family and will always fight hard to support them and do anything for their sake no matter what the problems come to. Guess that is what being “Kamidere” or Goddere implies as this is how at one point she defines herself in one notable scene. Amusingly she also says the word kuudere which is were most of us heard of it first so awesome! The family love also includes being a caring wife as seen in Libido in short. Much like cats she is no good with hot food. Oh, and she has powers naturally besides being crazy strong such that already mentioned telepathy and mind control ability but also the mini-me army of sorts and briefly temporally turned into a magical girl. Overall Kyouka is a fun wacky heroine protagonist that made her series much more enjoyable to watch and not many animes have mothers as main characters. But stuff like Sailor Moon with future kids.
Grade: B

: Wait, so your hair can talk with other people?

: Of course! Let the great Kyouka show you how! *her ahoge stiffs up and waves while making this sound* This is the great Kyouka. Your reply, please...

: Why does everyone use that line...?

: Hey, Salami! How is life going?

: Never liked that name... In fact I would prefer if you let me play, this course with the Ghost House theme is obnoxious.

: Can’t spare a bit of time for a fellow goddess?

: Sorry, but I’m from Shinto beliefs while you’re from the Demon Tribe and that is not even remotely in the same pantheon.

: Dull as always...

: So I am. Now excuse me as I close the divine chat room. *does so*

: And that was that.

This was pretty strange all right.

: Slave, stop meandering and finish the blog!

Libido
Kyouka is interesting because she’s married but the reasons were rather unorthodox so one would expect this to be bad. Nope, as Kyouka truly loves Ouka and is totally and utterly devoted to him like good wives are. Sadly he’s not a good husband and lacks much interest in his beautiful loli wife, for shame. Kyouka can be quite jealous too though blame this on TV being terrible influencing people. At least he eventually did realize how awesome his dommy loliwife is because she gets pregnant so go maturing.
Grade: B+

: Sounds like the people who claim video games are evil and will make you kill people.

Mistress, that’s old. Now video games will make you touch little girls.

: They do? Then honey should play lots of games so he touches my body plenty!

Sadly for you all these claims are baseless nonsense from people who think games about chest growth are for pedophiles and some bouncy breasts are AO material.

: So boobs turn people into boobs?

Except mistress, yes.

: Hence why you are such an ass!

Age
Kyouka is 20 years old. Normally this is bad, but since she is loli this is awesome. On top of that her love interest is a few years older, so even better. The show also joked once that girls 20 or more cannot be magical girls and Cure Flower scoffed at that because of how dumb the statement was. Because of her age in the novels she does smoke and drink but the anime removed these for whatever reason, presumably quite arbitrary censorship boards being absurd as usual.
Grade: A+

Voice
Ayumi Fujimura has a nice cute voice for Kyouka, good but not amazing. At least this is like her best role of her for me so there is that, give this woman better roles please because honestly she deserves that much. Also her personal ED is cute and nice and overall really fits Kyouka so that helps.
Grade: B

Total: 80 (B)

: Eh, not as well as Haruhi but beats the reverse of me at least.

Sorry, but scores just come that way sometimes...

: Is fine, though. Now I see you are an honest man! And perverted, too.

: That my slave is!

: Hence my constant Fujioka punishments.

: Ha ha hah! Zettai, looks like these girls adore you very much.

Well, seeing as how they stuck around for years this much is obvious.

: Well, in this case I shall assist you in this noble entourage!

: What?

Means she joins the party.

: Yes, but only until we find and defeat the giantess. Quick, let’s go! *takes both lolis by hand*

Think that you forgot someone.

: Oh, sorry. *grabs Zettai’s neck with her tail and holds his face near her ass* At last set, so HERE WE GO! *leaps hard following the trail of destruction*

Oooooh! *squirms from the strong tail and soft ass*

: Here we are! *stops in front of the giantess*

: Thank you! *lands safely*

: That was fun! *lands safely*

OWIE! *bounces on Kyouka’s ass and lands poorly*

: Hey, at least you got to enjoy my ass on your face!

Right, right, thank you... *gets up and stares at the giantess* YOU!

: I am Tsukiko formerly known as Catnip or just “T” if you meant that... Perverted Blogger #2.